Fuck he didn’t like me
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@mygaycrush
Fuck he didn’t like me
Why can’t he just tell that I like him, I’m shit at hiding it.
He got a hair cut and when he came up to the table I couldnt fucking talk and there were these awkward pauses where I just stared at him taking it in, holy shit he was so hot.
I wish everything was easier, he’s found a new girl and I’ve found a fucking broken heart
I was wrong
I have decided that his and I’s friendship is worth more than some stupid crush. I may like him a lot but I've remembered how to turn it off, so I will not be pursuing my feelings for him any longer.
I’m not an idiot, I’m just worried he’s gonna find out I like him because I told people about my feelings for him without thinking of the consequences.
I’m so fucking fucked, I’m an idiot, an absolute idiot. Why the fuck do I do this shit. He’s gonna find out, _ _ _ _ _ is gonna fucking find out.
_ _ _ _ _ pt2
why does he have to look like that, move like that?
why does he have to be so soft, so funny?
Why do I have to like him so?
why is he so captivating?
Why does his touch make me spiral and tingle? Why is he so pretty, so handsome? Why is he so close? Why does he steal my breath? Why does he make me daydream?
I wonder what would happen if he found out?
I wonder if he’d stop talking to me, wonder if he’d get mad, or worse uncomfortable, wonder if we’d stay friends.
I wonder if I’ll ever find out.
_ _ _ _ _
why does he have to look like that, move like that?
why does he have to be so soft, so funny?
Why do I have to like him so?
why is he so captivating?
Why does his touch make me spiral and tingle? Why is he so pretty, so handsome? Why is he so close? Why does he steal my breath? Why does he make me daydream?
Daydream of the spring at the park, laying on a blanket on the hill, just me and him. Sneaking out of my second-story window. Holding his hand. His hand on my back.
I wonder if he finds me the same.
I wonder if I’ll ever find out.
A day in positivity #3
Today I did a science experiment, I drank a cup of water before school then I had my metal water bottle and a plastic one from home, filled them both. Off to school! By the second period , (Lunch), I was oddly thirsty so I had already drunk the metal water bottle and more than half the plastic. I had chicken fingers and a vegetable tray, I felt healthy eating it. In the third period, we did dancing again. By the end of the third period, I had finished the plastic water bottle and was extra thirsty for a third. I thought this was odd because generally, I go throughout the day on one Dasani water bottle. Well between the third and fourth periods, I headed to the vending machine and purchased a Dasani water bottle. Math was up, but the bottle was too cold, so I drank about a quarter by the end of the Fourth period. Social came and I studied hard. Near the end, I realized I hadn't finished my water bottle, I chugged it. Hometime. 3 cups of water and 2 water bottles. Studied and ran for 10 mins on the treadmill. Conclusion: my pores look smaller and my fine lines have filled out, but I pee constantly
A day in positivity #2
This morning I woke up late, instead of my early wake up last day (6:40) I woke up at 7:30. But luckily, I took my shower and still had time to spare! English Advanced once again, we were assigned easy homework, a collage and poem of sorts. I haven't had homework like this since middle school! Second period, Lunch. My friend had confided in me about how she had attempted suicide and I invited her to sit with my friend group during lunch today and she seemed to be more relaxed, my friend group is pretty positive and happy. Third period, Chinese, turns out we do not have time for studying in class, so convincing her I am dedicated will be more challenging, but I will do it. Then we practiced the dance we will be performing in our Multi-cultural Event. We wore kimonos and danced to a Chinese song, ironic. The kimono Triggered my Body dysmorphia and made me feel fat, but I tried to ignore it and dance through, after the third dance-through of the song I was feeling much more confident and wasn't bothered by the kimono anymore. I left the class feeling confident and energized. Period Four, Math, we have been learning trigonometry, and I am thoroughly confused. I began my homework in class and everything was going smoothly, I was understanding and solving. But later, the homework would prove to be more confusing than first anticipated. Finally, fifth period, Social Studies, this period would usually announce the end of the school day, but today, and for me, it would not. Yesterday I had finished Unit 13 at home and today we were beginning Unit 14, which I would later complete. I worked hard and today's class was enjoyable, Mrs. Dyck is an amazing teacher and has such a bad reputation among the students for no reason. Sixth period, Technical theatre, that drive and energized-ness from math and social carried into Tech and I finished carving the gravestones! Hometime, which I began by cleaning the skink enclosure! my mom had started a bit of it before I was home (thanks mom love you) and I was able to complete it in a little bit less than an hour, which is a record time! Now. The time has come. homework, as I had said before, math homework had proven to be a struggle I finished the first few questions in a breeze, then the last two (and a half) questions. I just could not figure them out, even though I was using the right formula the answer was just wrong. But no tears, I moved on to Chinese, I studied the first paragraph in the reading final. I did a ten-minute run, I felt so much better afterwards:)Last but not least, I finished Unit 14 in social with the help of my friend Jen. Now its bedtime. Good night!
A day in positivity
I awoke early, I was ready and even though the holidays had ended and I missed relaxing, I also missed my friends. The school began with English advanced, today though the class seemed foreign, turned upside down. I don't know quite why but that feeling of unnatural ended at around the 4th period. but lest we continue, period two, I had already been given a PRT to write that we had loosely planned; so I was relieved for the second period, lunch. the offness of the day did still continue with the table being oddly chat-less. I ate a soup some baked Cheetos and some fuit gummies. period 3, Chinese advanced. we were given the final reading exam to study. to get a high grade I have to study in class so Mrs. Cai believes that I am dedicated to Chinese, which seems to boost my mark. a simple period, it was hard to stay awake some parts, and others I was fully immersed. Period four, THE FUNK FINALLY LIFTED! I talked to my friend Avarie about the guy I liked we joked a bunch and were given an easy unit and simple homework to do for tonight. It was still slight-a-funk but I think that's just the after-break-blues. Math I find easy so this period was very relaxed. Next period social. I cannot remember what happened, I had zoned so far out that period. Finally home time. I spent my home time Facetiming my cousin and doing homework and setting up my exam schedule.
this sweater looks comfy
can anyone send me
send me some songs for unrequited (gay) love?
I don’t know what to do
The guy I have liked for a year and a half, broke up with his girlfriend. (He’s bi) I don’t know if I should pursue him? I have been comforting him but he doesn’t feel too upset about it, idk if it’s the new shock or what ever. But I’m fucking anxious all the time but I like him so much and yeah.
Little Falls Herald, Minnesota, November 16, 1900
Okay I haven’t posted in a long time but news flash:
I met a boy, he’s really nice, he’s in my chinese class
We started talking during this art thing, it felt a little forced, but wasn’t terrible
Two days later we go on a field trip to a art museum and as we’re walking I noticed he’s standing next to me almost the whole time.
After we looked at the art we were moved to a new room where the whole class does art. He leaves his friends, even though they are calling him to sit with them. He talks to me and we joke a bunch.
On the bus ride home we kept looking at each other
I went home and found his Instagram and followed him, he followed me back.
But I’m dating this girl, and I don’t know what to do cause I’m a fucking idiot. And gay as fuck
I hate highschool