actually since i know im not gonna finish the rake goring drawing anytime soon (busy for the next few days) i shall leave u all with this thank u thank u..
Man posting writing on deviant art these days is a nightmare I've gotten multiple messages of people selling the chance to turn my story into a comic. All with 0 art posted and a 'message me on discord!' so I can only assume this is some ai art scam. Shit is rough out there.
It's always a vague positive comment that makes it clear they didn't read shit. How lame.
But uh hey, Mrcreepypasta said he plans on posting a reading next week. So at least I'll have that to link at some point.
that is one of the generic coats I draw often yes. Though I do think it would be really funny if the reason the squid started stalking him was due to the shoulder drop off part of the coat matching how their body kinda has that going on. Not canon but fun.
Coming over from mr houseparty’s blog but who is mills? Like, as a charecter
Mills is a man who was a part of a group of random people selected sacrificed to bring an eldritch monster into reality. They picked people who didn't have family or people who upon observation were judged as easily forgotten.
Instead thanks to outside influences, an annoying dick named Kenneth (who lives in Mills' head now), and his own spite ended up devouring the eldritch being's heart instead. Inheriting the title of 'Eldritch Lord of ancient flesh', and a pocket dimension made entirely of meat an bone.
This wasn't really something he set out intending to do, infact he hates everything about it. Yet the reason he was even capable of handling something like that is largely due to his own choices and mistakes. If he hadn't have stepped up the world would have basically been doomed. So he's saddled with power he never wanted, when he'd really rather just be at home watching old action and kaiju movies.
With his options basically being locked away, attempting to take over the world, or become a monster hunter he landed on the monster hunter path. He's got a truck load of guilt, and that route was the only one that would stop other people ending up like he has.
Now he struggles to maintain his sanity when faced with what he is, and how no matter how hard he tries to fight it he'll never really be human again.
There's a lot more but I think that's okay as an overview?
drew perverted rake art, felt bad, so i am now scribbling Mills!!!!! I MISS MILLS I MISS MILLS!!!! I NEED MILLS!!!! I'LL DIE MILLS IF U DONT LET ME S..no. I shan't say...
When things spiral I’ve always resorted to spewing my thoughts down on paper. Something about seeing everything laid out tends to clear the mind. Unfortunately it also ends up making the mistakes made even more glaring, but a little embarrassment and a handful of regrets aren’t much to worry about at this point. I’ve been dealing with a situation, yes, most people have their fair share of problems. Though this one’s gone from being a tad absurd, to an outright trainwreck in the stupidest way.
It started months ago, and long story short, there’s a squid monster that lives in the woods behind my house. I know how it sounds, but I swear there’s a 6 foot tall tentacled being that just hides along the trees out there. I still don’t fully know why or how something that should live in water survives out there, but they sure did.
It’s weird. Sometimes it spreads its seemingly endless tendrils outward blending into the grass and dirt. Other times it’ll focus more on height, twisting in on itself and stretching upwards and hiding in a mess of branches and leaves. Naturally it has a slightly purple tone to it’s… flesh? I guess? You’d figure it’d stick out even if it is dark out there. Well, unfortunately it’s full of solutions. They've got this fun little hobby of changing the entire texture and colour of its skin, so as to better blend in wherever it's hiding. Meaning when pretending to be a tree it is borderline impossible to notice, but sprawled out on the ground elevation difference gets the better of it. Since the head can never flatten out enough to fully mitigate that aspect.
All of this is stuff, it's just fun facts I’ve learnt about it over time. It could be basically invisible if it wanted to. Unfortunately, it decided that it wanted to be noticed, and after it made that choice it found out that it really enjoyed watching me react at the sight of it through my window. At least, that’s the only way I can make some sort of sense out of all of this mess.
I had no real idea what to do back then, and was basically terrified 90% of the time. Doing nothing wasn’t helping, so I picked off the problems I could. Starting with figuring out if I was just crazy, or if all of this was actually real. Since it seemed set on keeping its distance for the time being, I covered the house in a pretty crazy camera set up. That move that murdered my bank, got results while also making things significantly worse.
While I quickly amassed footage of it, and proof it was real. It was tied up with something far more bitter, the realization of just how often it was around. At first I had a motion detector set to beep anytime something was picked up, but when it started going off every 10 to 15 minutes it wasn’t long before it got muted. Was that just ignoring the problem? Yes, but the other option was making myself sick with anxiety and dropping a truckload of paranoia on my brain. Given that falling asleep was already enough of a problem even before all of this. I figured I’d die of exhaustion long before I came up with an answer, or the squid made its move.
Ignorance was far from bliss, but it was enough to keep going day in and out while I kept building up a stockpile of photos and videos of it. My so-called undeniable proof, and my ticket to getting the cops involved. I don’t really know what I expected them to do, but I was convinced that getting armed help of any kind was my way out of this. It’s just… You get stuck in your head after dealing with something like that for so long. It’s easy to forget that what’s now ‘normal’ still isn’t to the rest of the world. So when you lose that perspective, and start a conversation with what could be summarized as ‘oh hey, there’s a squid living in the woods and it’s stalking me’, people don’t really take anything that follows seriously... I tried several times, with more and more concrete footage but all I ever got in return was a; ‘oh it’s probably some teen pulling a prank’, Or a ‘well hey, if they don’t cross the property line there’s nothing illegal here’.
It didn’t make sense to me. How could they look at it changing to blend in and still think that it was something a normal piece of tech, or an idiot with a costume could pull off. That’s not even touching on its unnatural movement or how each tentacle was capable of moving independently.
Every time I tired, I left with the sound of them mocking and laughing at me still ringing in my ears.
At that point I just wanted someone to see what I did, so I tried at least posting what evidence I had online, but either it was called ai, or ‘impressive special effects’. Sure there was a guy or two that was convinced, but when their post histories involved mostly conspiracy ramblings, or ratings of obscure porn it didn’t exactly feel like the kind of company I wanted to keep. For some reason I had these standards like ‘at least I wasn’t that crazy’. Given my diminishing sanity at the time, yeah that was vastly overestimating how I was doing.
So I’d hit a wall, I was out of options, stuck knowing that I was being stalked but with nothing I could do about it. Everyday could have been the day that it finally decided to do more than just watch. Instead time just ticked away, days turned into months and slowly I fell into a routine of ignoring the problem again. Really, It was really only a matter of time before things got bad again. Though I still don’t have an answer as to why things changed when they finally did. One morning I just woke up to rabbit corpses strung up along the back of my fence. It didn’t take a genius to put together what’d done it.
It wasn’t an easy watch when I finally got the nerve to check the recordings. Even factoring in the distance and video quality, the brutality and cruelty is still burnt in my memories. Each of the animals had been alive at the time it was attached. Left to hang, wrapped in the part that made this somehow even worse. The squid had torn off its own tendrils, unlike the ones I’d seen it most of the time to move around. They were thin, hard to break, and long enough to be a perfect replacement for rope. Assuming you ignored how they bled, rotted, and how disgusting it looked and smelt.
Not knowing where else to turn, I fell back on old habits. I managed to convince myself that the cops had to take this seriously after that. There were bodies involved, even if yes they were just rodents it’s more than what I’d had up till this point. While that guess was right, it did end up getting them to do a single investigation. One that ended after an hour… When officers left they seemed tense, I swear they saw something but no matter how many times I asked it got ignored. They just left, leaving me feeling more defeated than I’d ever been.
That was the breaking post in a lot of ways. I started looking into getting a gun, something I avoided after the cops mentioned it could be some idiot in a costume. Of course I knew that was obviously bullshit, but I lacked the nerve back then and wasn’t ready to commit murder to get out of this. Not that it mattered in the end… At some point reporting to the cops like I had must have been put on file, and came up when a background check was done. So I got flagged as a mental risk.
When I pivoted from that I considered moving, but quickly realized that it really an option, financially, occupationally, or contractually… While getting out prioritizes not dying, there was the potential of never finding more work, the job market is a deeper hell than I was drowning in. I could be without a place to stay, no savings or safety net… Starving out on the street cold and alone. At least if the squid decided to finally get rid of me it’d probably be quicker… I’d also die full and warm if given the choice. Delusional conclusions maybe, but after facing this problem for months I can’t say that my thoughts were in the best place.
So after so long of that stupid game, I just got to a point where I reached acceptance. Grew numb to all of it, after all even the scariest and loudest jumpscare eventually stops hitting when you see it every day. Now It was just a part of the routine. and since things didn’t seem to get worse it kinda started to feel like we had a quiet agreement. It got to watch me, all it wants as long as it stays on the side of the fence… and I’d just have to get rid of the mess it’d make all over from time to time.
Not that cleaning up was completely without experimentation. If I immediately removed the bodies, more showed up sooner. If I left them hanging for too long, something living in the woods would eventually try eating them… The squid really seemed to really hate that, and I’d find larger animals like raccoons, foxes, and a few birds of prey just left dead and left on the ground in front of the ‘decorated fence.
At some point I reached a state of manic genius, and got this hypothesis stuck in my head that maybe my clearing up approach was wrong from the start… I’d put on gloves, stuff everything in trash bags and throw it out like normal trash. From its perspective that’d be like me accepting its gift that it’d been leaving. So instead I tried spraying the bodies with a hose till they fell off where they were hanging from and leaving them there. Hoping that that'd make it clear I both saw its offering, and had no use for it.
I can’t explain how hyped I was to find out that my message did indeed get across. Though the results were less than perfect. It made it change its habits, yes, but instead of leaving me food it started knocking over the trash, and eating whatever scraps were left. So maybe instead of not seeming interested, I’d just told them I have too much food… Still it was an improvement! Even if I’d just replaced one type of mess with another, this one was only annoying, and not an outright massacre.
It wasn't a situation I wanted to deal with but at least it became manageable. After everything that’d happened I could live with that. Unfortunately though… Just as some degree of understanding was being reached I made a mistake I couldn’t ever recover from. One that wasn’t due to the squid at all.
No, instead their name was Jake. He lived near my house growing up, was always a little strange but I’d chalked that up to a weird sense of humor. It’s not like we were best friends, but these days once every few months the dude would randomly hit me up.
It was the most basic of basic conversions. How could I have known what it would lead to?
“So what’s new with you?”
I could have talked about work, or whatever I was playing, or how the weather has been pretty awful… I’d made real progress with the squid problem. I didn't need to talk about it. But I was stupid and didn’t treasure what I had going. I wanted to rant, complain, and feel like I wasn’t crazy for a once in a blue moon. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
I caught him up on the bullshit with my forest squid. Showed him the pictures and videos. And he just kept asking for details, and like an idiot I answered, never questioning why he was so interested in it. Though the signs were obviously there. It started with saying how ‘pretty’ the colour they were most of the time was, or how it was more of an octopus anatomically. Which didn’t make much sense after thinking about it for more than five seconds. The octa being the glaring problem given it has more than 8 tentacles. I think he was just trying to sound smart while talking out his ass.
His obsessions on strange details were… uncomfortable to say the least. Like how he said it ‘sways its hips’ when it moves despite having none to speak of. If it had a beak hiding under all limbs… Or if it had one heart or two. What skin to sucker contact would feel like...
Unfortunately I answered like he was asking legitimate questions. Sure it felt off, but that squid had been tossing in a dash of unending nightmares to my day to day life for so long… How could I have even imagined that those strange little tangents of his were implying what they did!? Even after rereading the logs I still don’t fully understand when it happened, but somehow to Jake this conversation had become about another thing entirely… And it turned out I’m dumb as a sack of bricks for not fully processing everything until he bluntly made his tastes clear, he even included art he found relevant… That stuff…
Yeah, I don’t ever want to remember, much less write down the details. The visceral revulsion that hits lands significantly harder when you’re faced with the subject in question waiting directly outside your window. The details don’t need to be recorded beyond that. Just know that it took me a long time to respond or even process that he could see that thing as a possibility… uh Mate? Boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't feel like the right word to use when half the combo is more tentacle than body.
Of course I said the obvious things like it’s going to kill you if you show up, or how it might get pissed at me and ruin this little cold war thing I’ve got going for me. I even got desperate enough to try and argue that it wasn’t even a recognizable gender so it might not even be physically possible… Promoting a horrifying
‘it’s close enough for me, tentacles can fill in a lot of gaps.’
I still remember wanting to crawl out of my skin after that… I hated it, and even after he made his intentions completely clear I still tried to pretend like it was just all a stupid joke, and hoped that this’d never come up again. He’d stopped talking after that, so I could still pray that maybe, just maybe he was just drunk when he was messaging. I’m not that lucky unfortunately, because two days later, he was knocking like his life depended on it.
When I eventually gave up and opened the door for him, he looked like a mess, and his hair was tangled and had leaves and sticks stuck in it, and he was covered in caked on dirt.
“This is a joke right?”
“You expect me not to show up after all that?”
“You stopped responding so yes.”
“I had to prepare.”
“By rolling around in the dirt and diving into bushes?”
“There’s definitely a bush I’d love to dive into, but no It’s called blending in.”
“...Is that supposed to be a sex thing? It’s a squid it doesn’t-”
“Details, details.”
“Please leave.”
“No, come on this is a once if a time chance, you’ve gotta show-”
God I still remember the manic look on his face as I tried closing the door on his face, practically clawing at the door frame before he forced his way in. He was dedicated to this in a way I’d never seen before.
“This isn’t like that weird anime thing you sent before Jake. It has been out there stalking me for months.”
“Lucky bastard, I’d take anything being interested in me at this point.”
I was admittedly a little knocked off guard by the depressing honesty of that, and unfortunately I was stupid enough to consider that maybe this was more complicated.
“Are you doing okay man…? Did you stop taking your meds or something?”
“Let’s not get into that, so have you gone back there looking for it yet?”
“Jake, what you’re aiming for here isn’t going to happen. Come on, sit down, you aren’t thinking right.”
“I’m fine.”
It was an obvious lie but he went and sat down on the couch, and I had a real opportunity to at least try and steer the conversation away from his stupid degeneracy.
“Be honest with me, how are things? ”
Instead of looking me in the eye his attention was drawn to the table lamp beside him, It was made of metal and had a glass lamp shade. A real fancy antique that he immediately got to pulling the small chain and turning it off and on. Stopping eventually to ask;
“Have you gone out looking for it?”
“Jake, you can ask as many times as you want but the answer is still no. It’s too dangerous.”
Again he delayed his response just letting the repeated click of the lamp turning off and on to fill the air.
“Has it ever done anything to you?”
“Besides killing animals, ruining my sleep, knocking over my trash, and making me seem crazy?”
His eyes finally moved away from the lamp to me.
“That’s not actually attacking you, just the wildlife.”
“‘Just wildlife’? Come on Jake you can’t be that naive...”
“You’ve never been out there, you don’t know what they’re like.”
It was like my words weren’t even reaching him. He ignored so much of what I said just to go back to the same thing over and over. It was so outrageous, and stupid, but somehow sent off a sick feeling that kept boiling in my stomach. Still I convinced myself that if I could just lure him away from this topic maybe it would save him.
“It’s not going anywhere. How about we go out, watch a flick or something. I hear a bunch of stuff is reviewing really well lately.”
The lamp clicked on and off again, and again.
“You don’t even know what’s playing do you?”
“Has that ever stopped us before? Remember that one summer where we snuck in to the theater and hopped from movie to movie and every sucked worse than the last-”
“You're trying to distract me.”
“It doesn’t come out till night, Jake.”
“Then I’ll wait here.”
I got so desperate then, not just to save him from himself, but to avoid him breaking what little stability I’d built up.
“Please stop, either it eats you alive or it doesn't show up and you get lost in the woods.”
“That forest isn’t even big enough to get lost in.”
“Pretty sure you could find a way, given that you’ve never camped and you barely leave your house.”
He avoided looking at me, attention locked back on the metal lamp.
“I’m going to go out and see her.”
“You’ll die, how many times do I have to repeat that before it sinks in?!.”
“And that’d be fine by me.”
“...Excuse me?
“I’d rather go out doing what I loved, than deal with the other crap going on.”
“Jake, please breathe and think this over... You’re acting delusional, it’s a monster looking for a meal, not… Whatever you think this is.”
“A meal is a date regardless of the menu.”
How does a person even respond to something like that? It’s a joke, I should’ve been able to play into it, and make a retort about how terrible his taste in women is... But when everything's overshadowed by the reality of what he wants, how obviously messed up his head was then, and how it could wreck the fragile status quo I had going… I ended up resorting to a threat.
“If the only way to stop you is calling the cops trespassing, I’ve got ample proof. There’s cameras all over and you forced your way in.”
“Go for it, I’ll be in the forest by the time they show up.”
“You’ll get caught long before it gets dark.”
“Then I’ll just have to show up at night once I get bailed out.”
“Jake no matter what you tell yourself this isn’t worth it.”
“It really is though, you’ve got the hottest thing I've ever seen wanting your dick and you're just acting like a bitch about it! If you are going to hop on that I will!”
“Wanting my what…? Really? How, are you really going this goddamn stupid!? I’m the one who will have to deal with the situation if anything happens to you.”
“Then come with me, you can introduce us and make sure the introductions go buttery smooth.”
“I’m not marching to my death just because you’ve got this stupid idea rammed in your head. You’re going to get killed, and I’ll be the one left telling your parents you died trying to screw a squid.”
“It’d be an improvement on their end. They haven't talked to each other without spiraling into an argument in three years.”
“That’s…”
“Yeah it’s stupid isn’t it? They hate each other and are actively fucking other people but won’t untie that knot cause it’s a sin. Fighting 24 7 though? Well that's all good.”
Even in hindsight this was miles above my paid grade. My sanity had been battered again and again for months, how was I supposed to talk someone down when my own brain was being held together with tape and a copious amount of ‘ignoring every problem that came my way’.
“Jake… Come on man, let's go out, we can get a drink and get your mind off everything.”
“I don’t need that. I rushed over the second you showed me everything and I won’t let you get in our way.”
“Rushed over? ...But the last time we talked was two days ag-”
Before I finished that final word the lamp he’d been fiddling with came colliding into my skull. The details after that are foggy even now. There was a sickeningly loud cracking sound, some shattering glass too, but they seem inconsequential. No it was Jake’s completely expressionless face, and his dead looking eyes that managed to cut through damage the clearest.
Looking back, maybe it was strange that I got stuck on the time aspect before the nonsense about getting in the way. Was it because that problem felt real while his obsession was just repeating nonsense? Clearly pointing the problem out triggered what came after, but why…?
I don’t know, and it’s not that the answer to that puzzle would help me much now, much less back then… The blow to the head was bad enough that I should have died. Instead woke up being held together by a dozen arms. It was a sense of safety I hadn’t felt since I was a child, a feeling quickly smashed to pieces when I finally opened my eyes.
The room was drenched in blood, there wasn’t anything identifiable, just hunks of meat spread randomly across the floor. The monster that had been stalking me for so long, had wrapped itself all around me while I was out cold. Prodding at my skull countless tiny appendages, some dug deep, others scratched the surface, but all of them broke something. Words wouldn’t come, my body couldn’t move, and only my mind was left screaming begging for it to all end. Each movement it made led to a pressure building within my brain and in my eyes, escalating to what seemed like the only possible end point…
Just as I felt like my life was over, the prying tendrils pulled back and a voice filled my mind. Each phrase came with an unnatural tone, some whispers, while others battered every sense…
“I, understand
we, have learnt.
The source…
Disgusting.
Harmful.
Desperate.
UNWORTHY.
Yet the corpse..
is useful…
The feeling…
We misunderstood
affection…
Admiration.
And love…
Clarity through..
CONSUMPTION.
How…
Awful it was.
Yet you breathe.
So…
We are
Happy.
It drew my head upwards and locked forcing me to stare up at its purple and orange eyes, their horizontal iris’s moving ever so slightly. They were unnatural and unnerving, yet breathtakingly beautiful. It was a moment that felt like it lasted an eternity and hours seemed to meld and pass like seconds…
That’s how things ended up the way they have. She hasn’t left since then. Sometimes I give in to the peace and comfort she offered, we share meals and act like a screwed up couple and pretend nothing's wrong. Other times she seems on the edge of ripping me apart. It wakes me up enough to remind me that I need to run, but no matter how far I travel I’d always end up back home. I even resorted to praying for a while, that maybe work or the police would figure out what had happened. But like always no matter how blatant the proof, or how obviously wrong things were… Problems always work out in her favor. Leaving me ensnared in her ‘loving’ embrace, her tentacles wrapped around my throat as an ever looming reminder. Constantly dancing on a razor's edge..
How did a simple ‘whats new with you?’ spiral into this? This wasn’t something I wanted to deal with, hell I actively did everything I could to avoid getting involved with her for months.
God that’s not even the most frustrating part…
What gets me is that I know Jake is a bastard and I should be glad he’s dead. Instead there’s just too many missing pieces muddying the water. Why did those real moments have to slip in between him wanting to screw the damn squid? He tried to murder me, I’ve earned the right to hate the guy haven’t I? Then why won’t that resentment stick? Am I convinced he's a victim in this too? Or am I just using that thought as a way of telling myself to not fall for the comfort that grows more and more tempting as the days pass.
Even after writing all of this down I don’t know. The fact remains that Jake opened the door for her, and instead of getting what he wanted… His ‘dream’ was forced on me, while his corpse went cold as it coated the floors and walls.
Now the only way to survive is to keep her ‘happy’. That's my life now.
i got 3 more asks until I open up the inbox again, but instead i did these two things!
both hc related for rake obviously, I think i actually shared these two ideas before, or at least typed them out..just an excuse now to doodle splendorman patting rake LOL
Mills belongs 2 @/myhatisblue
part of me sometimes forgets i hc'd rake losing their teeth a lot..and having..quite a lot of teeth to spare...
tbh i am working on cuomms atm, but needed to doodle silly things and mills bc im freak, and also a possible future drawing??question mark? after im done w this other stuffs. maybe. depends i guess... anyways urrmm
Man there's no doubt that the next story part is gonna be the longest. I'm not even done the rough draft and it's 11 pages. Plus I know for sure that there's already parts need to be elaborated further on.
...It really doesn't help that I've been quite lazy lately.
gotta say,,weirdest fanart doodle of someone elses character i have drawn i think, guess this can count as a warmup lol!!
Edit; all that yaopin and i forgot; SNECKDRAW BELONGS 2 @/MYHATISBLUE
Anyways Long winded yappering undercut
due to sneckdraws more..frail? skeletal look on his face and baldness, wiz (or more-so, Her) and his colors (red and white,) would prob see/make references related to him with fireflies, specifically the maya depiction of fireflies(kuhkay), they have their associations with the underworld(and smoking/cigars, mills woulda gotten one too but he's not bald or dead looking enoughloltho nearly nude mills....🤤)
i seem to be very big on drawing sneckdraw without clothing, not enough boils/cysts things bc initially i was gonna be erm, wiz pov type thing and I don't think they have seen him nakey thankfully
if ur curious, the symbol on his head(and the wings) is the glyph for dark
^^ Justin Kerr's K8007, Vase depicting fireflies! (mayavase,pretty nice collection of vase art and info on where they're found, alongside sculptures and sites etc)
wiz canonically isnt maya but aztec have traded with the region, i believe? i could be wrong..
That's so fucking cool, and makes a lot of sense for them!
Though I have to wonder if this is just Wiz trying to soften the blow of Snecko just being some decrepit lab rat, and not some monster that he postures as.
Not that Sneckdraw can even really play the part of a human accurately anymore. Since he kinda cut away anything that got in the way of his 'work'.
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