It was a Thursday afternoon in Port Angeles, and there I was, locked in a boutique dressing room, eyes full of tears and feet tucked onto the bench, hoping and praying that Jessica Stanley would leave soon.
It was prom season at Forks High School, and somehow I had managed to secure a date. Me. Of all people! A boy from my math class, Edward Cullen, had asked me yesterday if I would be his date, and though it took quite a lot of convincing, I had agreed to go. I was pretty sure it was a prank of some kind and that I was setting myself up for disappointment, but my mom had insisted I give Edward the benefit of the doubt.
His family was new in town, and he seemed pretty shy, keeping mostly to himself or his siblings, but so far he had been nothing but nice to me. He never laughed when I made mistakes in class or tripped in the halls. He had even told me I looked pretty once. I thought I could trust him, but I guessed I would just have to wait and see what happened.
Edward's smile had been enormous after I said yes to his invitation, and I was happy that I had made him happy. It felt nice to make a friend, if that's what you would say we were. He had even suggested we get together soon outside of school to make our plans.
For him, "soon" meant Saturday, so there I was on that gloomy afternoon, trying to put my plus-sized body into something resembling formal wear and hoping I didn't break a hip trying on matching high heels. My portion of "making plans" was not going well.
The store had been empty when I first arrived, thank God, and the sales associate had been as uninterested in me as I was in her. She waved her hand vaguely toward the back corner when I asked about finding my size and, since then, had not even looked my way.
It was okay, though. I was used to it, even if I wished I wasn't. People usually took one look at me and either sneered in disgust or ignored me completely, all because of my weight. I had lived with it for most of my life, and though I had learned to deal with the stares pretty well, their words could still hurt me.
I was flipping through the one rack of dresses in my size when some of those words hit my ears yet again. I groaned silently as the nasally whine of Jessica Stanley rang out behind me.
"I doubt you're going to find anything on that rack in your size, Y/N," she mocked. "But I heard Newton's is having a sale this week. Maybe you can get a good deal on a tent to wear!" She laughed her stupid hyena laugh as she looked at her friends, Lauren and Angela, for backup.
"Did you hear that, guys?" she asked. "I told her to go to Newton's!" She laughed again, Lauren joining in this time, while Angela said nothing.
I didn't reply to Jessica, but she knew I had heard her and kept up her rude commentary.
"I doubt she actually has a date to the prom. I mean, who wants to buy three tickets?" she asked.
"Three?" Lauren repeated. "Why three?"
"Well," Jessica began, "she's obviously big enough to count as two people on her own, so two for her and one for her imaginary date!"
They cackled in unison as I yanked some hangers off the rack and rushed over to the fitting room to escape them. I didn't want them to see me cry, and I could already feel the tears burning in my eyes.
Why were they so mean? I wondered that as the door slammed closed behind me.
This was why I had wanted to say no to Edward's invitation. Sure, he was nice, but the other kids at school were vicious, and once they saw him with me, they would make him miserable too. Any hope I had of being his friend would disappear immediately.
As I listened to my classmates continue to laugh at me, I came to realize that I was going to have to call off my date with Edward. I just couldn't let everyone treat him the way they treated me. He didn't deserve it.
I wiped my wet eyes with the back of my hand and flung the dresses I had grabbed onto the bench by the fitting room mirror. I was going to call Edward right now, and when Jessica and her awful friends went to try some clothes on, I could run out of there and go home. I should have known coming there was a bad idea. I grabbed my phone from my purse and quickly selected Edward's name from my contacts. He picked up immediately.
"Y/N?" he asked. His voice was strained, and he sounded worried. "What's wrong? Where are you? Alice said you were in trouble."
Alice? His sister? What did she have to do with anything? I shook my head to clear my thoughts.
"Edward. Um... hi. I'm fine... I just..." I took a shaky breath. "I can't go to the dance with you! I'm sorry." I did my best to muffle a sob and hoped to God he couldn't hear it through the phone.
"What? Why? Y/N, tell me what's wrong. Why would you say that? Why are you crying?"
I could hear the concern in his questions, and it broke my heart a little more when I repeated myself.
"I can't go with you to the prom anymore. There's just... reasons. I'm sorry, Edward." I whispered. "There's still a few weeks left, though. I'm sure there are lots of girls who would love to go with you... I just can't."
"Please, Y/N," Edward begged. "Don't say that. I don't want to go with anybody else; I want to go with you. Can I come see you so we can talk about this? Where are you?"
"I'm in Port Angeles, in a dressing room, but Edward, you don't have to—"
"Give me twenty minutes, Y/N, please! Just stay where you are. I'm coming!"
He ended the call before I could respond.
I huffed out a deep breath as I sat down on the padded bench, avoiding my reflection in the mirror. I didn't want to see my red-rimmed eyes or the deep frown on my face.
It was a hard pill to swallow, realizing Jessica was right about me not being able to find a dress that fit, but having to explain that to Edward was going to be even worse. I didn't know why he felt like he needed to come see me, but I knew I had to convince him not to go to the dance with me. I hoped he wouldn't hate me for it.
My tears began to fall again, and I had to cover my mouth to hold in my loud sobs. It just wasn't fair.
I lifted my feet onto the bench and hugged my knees to my chest, attempting to comfort myself and make myself as small as possible. Jessica and her cronies had watched me go into the dressing room moments earlier, but maybe they would forget about me if I didn't make any sounds or movements.
Edward had said he needed twenty minutes, but it might as well have been a lifetime. And what would he do when he got there anyway? Scare Jessica away?
I closed my eyes and tried to block out the voices of the other girls in the shop. My fingers reached out to stroke the soft fabrics of the dresses I had cast aside. I wished I felt half as pretty as they looked. Maybe if I was really quiet, I could try one on without drawing any attention. I wouldn't need to buy one, since I wouldn't be attending the prom now, but still, the experience might be nice.
I rubbed my fists against my eyes to clear away the remaining tears and, when I opened them again, tried to view my random dress selections with an open mind. I stood and hung the gowns up properly, smoothing out the wrinkles I had inadvertently created.
The first dress looked a bit matronly, unfortunately; a dusty rose color with gauzy flutter sleeves. It was probably more appropriate for a mother of the bride, but it did appear to be in my size.
The next one was more youthful in appearance, but not by much. It was a tea-length dress in navy blue with silver sequins scattered throughout. There were long bell sleeves that added a little whimsy, but it still wasn't really suitable for my age.
The third and final option showed some promise and was the one I chose to try on. It was entirely black, with long, smooth sleeves and an A-line skirt that fell to the floor. The top was made of soft, rich velvet, and the bottom was matte organza with something underneath it that made it puff out slightly.
I took my clothes off as quickly and silently as possible before taking a fortifying breath and sliding the black gown over my head. I had to tug a little to fit it properly over my breasts, but once everything was in place, it fit perfectly.
I closed my eyes tightly and turned to face the mirror, afraid of what I was going to see looking back at me.
Just as I began to crack one eye open, a knock sounded on the fitting room door, and I whirled around in shock.
"Uh... this one's occupied!" I called out quietly, hoping to any god above that it wasn't Jessica Stanley.
A high-pitched voice answered back.
"I know, Y/N. It's Alice. Cullen. You know, Edward's sister?"
"Um... hello, Alice. What can I help you with?" I asked hesitantly.
"Edward's out parking the car," she told me. "But I wanted to see if I could help you out at all. Do you want me to lock the Bitch Twins in their dressing rooms so you can shop in peace?"
A loud laugh burst out of me, and I had to cover my mouth to stop it from happening again.
"No, Alice, that won't be necessary. I was getting ready to leave soon anyway."
"You can't leave without a dress, though! Maybe I can help you find one?" she offered.
I sighed and opened the door to tell her the truth about not going, when suddenly I heard a gasp from just behind her.
"Y/N," he whispered reverently. "You look beautiful."
I looked down and realized I was still wearing the black dress I had tried on. My cheeks flared hot as I realized how ridiculous I must look. I fixed my gaze on the floor, doing everything I could to avoid looking at him.
"You shouldn't have come, Edward," I told him sadly. "I meant what I said on the phone earlier. I can't go to the prom with you."
He moved to step around Alice, whispering something to her that I didn't hear before coming to stand directly in front of me.
"I know what you said, Y/N. But I don't understand why. Is it something I said? Or something I did?"
I shook my head slowly. I didn't want to talk about this in the middle of a boutique, but I was realizing I didn't have much choice. He needed to hear my reason. I was about to respond when Alice interrupted.
"Why don't you two talk in the dressing room?" she suggested. "I'll go distract the enemy!" She giggled as she danced away, leaving Edward and me alone.
"Shall we?" he asked, waving a hand toward the fitting room and unnecessarily showing me the way.
I nodded and made my way back inside, sitting carefully on the bench and leaving enough room beside me for him.
"Edward," I began nervously, "I know you must be upset with me for canceling on you, but if you only understood..."
He reaches out and gently takes my hand in his. “Help me to understand then, Y/n. Do you want to go with someone else?”
“No! That’s not it at all! I did want to go with you, I do, but I just can’t. Do you know what people are going to say if we show up together?”
“Are you embarrassed to been seen with me?” He asks dejectedly.
“What? No! Of course not! It’s me that’s embarrassing. Edward, I don’t want you to have to been seen with me! You should have heard Jessica taunting me earlier, and the things they say to me at school! If you go to the dance with me they will turn on you too, and I don’t want that to happen! It would just be better if you took another girl.” A lone tear rolls down my cheek and Edward is quick to wipe it away with his thumb.
“I don’t care about the idiots at school, Y/n, and there is no other girl. You’re the one I want. They can tease me all they want, but it’s not going to change the way I feel about you.”
“The way you feel about me?” I ask shyly. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I really, really like you, Y/n. No playground bully is going to change that. I want to take you out to dinner, and movies, and walks in the forest; anywhere you can think of to go. I want to take you to the prom, and the Forks Street Dance, and ballroom dancing, and we can dance until we can’t stand up anymore! Jessica and Lauren can’t change my mind, no matter what they say.”
“Edward… that’s so sweet! I really like you too, but that’s not the only reason I can’t go. I don’t have a dress and when you are plus sized like me, it feels impossible to find one. Jessica even said…”
He stops me. “It doesn’t matter what Jessica said. She’s wrong. Do you not like the dress you have on?”
I look down in confusion, having already forgotten that I was wearing a gown all this time and not my regular clothes. “Oh, I guess I don’t know. I haven’t looked,” I admit.
“Well,” Edward says as he rises to his feet and offers me a hand up. “Let’s look together, shall we?” He steers me in front of the floor length mirror in the room and stands behind me with his hands firmly on my waist. “What do you think?” He asks.
I looked in the mirror and saw the shocking picture we made. He was tall and handsome, nicely dressed in a soft-looking beige sweater and dark jeans, and I...
The dress fit me beautifully, clinging to my curves in all the right places and flowing gently away from the areas I typically tried to hide. My eyes were shining brightly, no longer red or tear-filled, and I was smiling widely. Whether it was because of Edward or the dress itself, I didn't know, but I liked what I saw reflected back at me.
"Wow," I breathed, twisting back and forth a little to see every angle.
"I agree," Edward chuckled. "Wow, indeed. So what were you saying before about not having a dress to wear?"
He was teasing, but sweet.
"I guess I was wrong," I admitted quietly. "This is perfect."
"You are perfect," he replied gently. "So if we buy this dress, and Alice finds some shoes that you feel comfortable dancing in, will you still go to the dance with me?"
"I will! Oh, Edward, I'm sorry to drag you into my insecurities like this. I didn't really want to cancel. I just thought it would be easier on you if I did. I won't make assumptions anymore, I promise."
He lightly kissed the top of my head, his hands still resting securely at my waist. He watched me closely in the mirror as he spoke.
"We all have insecurities, Y/N. They just show up in different ways. You mean more to me than your dress size, and I'll do whatever I can to show you how much I care about you from here on out. If you really don't want to go to prom, that's okay."
Edward paused before continuing softly.
"But don't let cruel people make that choice for you."
I stared at our reflection in the mirror, at the sincerity in his golden eyes, and something inside me loosened for the first time in years. No one had ever looked at me the way Edward did—like I was something precious instead of something embarrassing.
"I do want to go," I admitted quietly. "I think... I'm just scared."
"That's all right," he murmured. "You won't be alone."
Before I could answer, the dressing room door flew open dramatically, and Alice poked her head inside with a triumphant grin.
"Good news!" she announced. "The Bitch Twins have retreated to the clearance section, and I found shoes!"
She held up a pair of black flats covered in tiny sparkling crystals.
Alice scoffed. "Please. Beauty should never require broken ankles."
Edward laughed, the sound warm and musical, and I found myself laughing too.
Alice ushered me out of the fitting room and practically shoved me onto a little pedestal near the mirrors while she knelt to help me into the shoes. They fit perfectly.
"There," she declared proudly, standing back beside Edward. "Now look."
I glanced at the mirror again and nearly stopped breathing.
For once, I didn't immediately notice every flaw.
I saw the soft way the velvet hugged my figure. The shimmer in my eyes. The smile tugging at my lips.
I saw a girl dressed for a dance with someone who genuinely wanted to be there with her.
And standing beside me, Edward looked positively awestruck.
"You're staring," I muttered shyly.
"I know," he said unapologetically. "I can't help it."
From somewhere behind us came Jessica Stanley's unmistakable voice.
I tensed instantly, my shoulders curling inward out of habit, but Edward's hand slipped gently into mine.
"Don't," he whispered. "Look at me instead."
So I did. And somehow, for the first time ever, her opinion didn't matter nearly as much as his.
Jessica strutted closer, Lauren trailing behind her. Both of them looked smug—until Edward turned toward them with his arm still firmly around my waist.
"Jessica," he greeted politely.
"I didn't realize you were shopping here too," he continued calmly. "Y/N and I are almost finished. We're excited for prom."
The way he said it—confidently, proudly—stunned me.
Jessica's eyes darted between us, clearly waiting for Edward to laugh or reveal some hidden joke, but he never did.
Finally, she forced a sickly smile.
Then she turned and hurried away so quickly that Lauren nearly tripped trying to follow her.
Alice burst into wicked little giggles beside me. "Oh, that was beautiful," she whispered.
Edward leaned close enough that only I could hear him.
"You know," he said thoughtfully, "I think they're jealous."
His expression remained perfectly serious.
"You're going to prom with the most handsome boy in school."
I rolled my eyes so hard it made him laugh again.
A little while later, after Alice insisted on buying me a silver hair clip "because every princess deserves accessories," Edward walked me out to my car under the gray Port Angeles sky.
Rain misted softly around us, cool against my warm cheeks and before I could climb into the car, Edward caught my hand.
"I need you to know something." His voice had gone nervous all of a sudden, which felt impossible considering how calm he always seemed.
"When I asked you to prom," he said carefully, "it wasn't a joke. I wasn't dared to do it. I wasn't trying to make anyone laugh."
His fingers tightened gently around mine.
"I asked you because every day in math class, I catch myself looking for you first. Because when you smile, I can't think straight for the rest of the day. Because you're kind even when people are cruel to you. And because being near you makes me happier than I've been in a very long time."
Tears burned in my eyes again, but this time they didn't hurt.
"And," he added shyly, "because I think I started falling in love with you a while ago."
The world seemed to go still.
Rain pattered softly against the pavement.
Alice pretended (very badly) not to eavesdrop from inside the car.
I stood there holding my beautiful black dress and sparkling shoes, feeling more seen than I ever had in my entire life.
Slowly, carefully, I reached up and kissed Edward on the cheek.
His stunned expression made me laugh.
"I think," I whispered, "I might be falling in love with you too."
His smile then was brighter than any sunshine Forks had ever seen.
And when prom night finally arrived a few weeks later, Edward Cullen looked at me like I was the prettiest girl in the room.
For the first time in my life, I believed it too.
