Domestic Violence Laughed At In The Street - Don't Worry, Victim Male
If, like me, you're living in 2014 and you've been knocking about on social media sites recently the chances are that one of your 'politically active' friends has shared this video, by ManKind, along with the type of one-word-caption that usually accompanies these things ("Horrific", "Unbelievable", "Sickening", etc). The Chairman of ManKind told The Huffington Post that he wanted to make this video after seeing the recent footage of an attack on Jay-Z by Solange.
"The reaction to the Jay-Z and Solange lift incident exposed the stark double standards towards violence against men and women in society. After the attack, the question trending on social media was 'what did Jay-Z say to Solange?'. If it was the other way around and Jay-Z had attacked Solange, people would have been asking very different questions."
Unlike most of the faux-political links that your friends bombard you with every day (they're usually articles from The Guardian), this one is actually worth watching. If you clicked on this article because you saw the headline, got ready to be outraged and appalled, and then calmed down when you read the 'Victim Male' part - you're part of the problem.The first half of the video shows a male actor abusing his female colleague in the street, and the reaction from onlookers is satisfyingly one of outrage. One man even offers the woman a place of refuge in his office so she can be safe, though most of them just verbally attack the abuser (surprisingly, nobody kicks his head in, though I'm guessing there was a lengthy conversation about where they could film the scene without him needing bodyguards).
But, as fans of Manchester City are well aware: the second half is where things get interesting. The 'couple' re-enact the exact same scene only reversed; with the woman abusing the man. The reactions from onlookers is decidedly different this time, with most people laughing at him, smiling to each other, and even taking pictures; undoubtedly so they can show all of their followers the hilarity of a man being verbally beaten down by a woman in the street.
And therein lies the problem. Not a single person rushed to the victim's aid this time, and though it's hard to say how much this contrast has been achieved through -ahem- selective editing, there is definitely a different atmosphere surrounding domestic violence when it is suffered by men at the hands of their wives or girlfriends.
The campaign has polarised opinion since 'going viral', with some wholeheartedly agreeing with the sentiment that men should feel more comfortable in coming forward and reporting these crimes - which is what they are - both to the authorities and perhaps more importantly, to their friends and family. Though this attitude change can only come from a dramatic shift in widespread opinion regarding domestic abuse, one that works towards breaking the stigma attached to being a domestically abused male.
The other camp, with whom I struggle to agree on this particular topic, are outraged. Claiming that the "double standards" associated with domestic abuse should not be the focus of discussion. One person even commented on an article by the Huffington Post stating that domestic abuse towards women remains "a far more lethal problem". This is where I start to struggle. If a hundred people are killed by cars, and one person is killed by a bus, is the bus less lethal? Of course it isn't, that's the thing about lethality - it's kind of an all-or-nothing concept. Male victims of domestic violence shouldn't be ostracized or forgotten about just because not enough of them are suffering from it. That would be like refusing to treat pneumonia because more people have cancer.
The video ends with the hashtag #ViolenceIsViolence, which is obviously the key 'take-away' from this campaign. To those of you who subscribe to the theory that ManKind are doing women a disservice by highlighting the disparities between how male and female victims are treated, simply put - you're wrong. This campaign isn't funded by money that has been redirected from support charities, it doesn't stem from a shift in government policy, it is simply spreading a message of equality and raising awareness of the cause. Ironically, many of the people who do align themselves with this opinion are people who so vehemently campaign in the name of equality on other issues.
Violence is violence, and support is support; neither of these concepts give a shit about gender. Neither should we.