it's written

[napadivya-blog]

“Those who believe in karma do not blame. They do not judge. They accept that humans live in a sea of consequences, over which there is limited control. So they accept every moment as it is supposed to be. They act without expectation.”

My Gita

[napadivya-blog]

Why Gender Matters?

We are part of a time wherein everyone believes that gender should not matter and to an extent that is true. It shouldn’t matter when an organization is recruiting, it shouldn’t matter when promotions are being handed out and it definitely shouldn’t matter when parents are expecting a baby! But it is good to understand the differences between both the genders. This enables us to understand each other and move forward with a united front.

Why Gender Matters “broke ground in illuminating the differences between boys and girls--how they perceive the world differently, how they learn differently, how they process emotions and take risks differently”. For example, did you know that a girl/woman’s voice sounds too low for a boy/man? Imagine this - you are a female teacher teaching and the boys in the back are always distracted. You as a teacher might think that they are disobedient or don’t understand the lesson. But it might just be that they are distracted because they can’t hear you! Why Gender Matters is full of such information that will help every individual understand how their gender and the opposite gender functions!

Go ahead and read this book, if not anything, you will understand why YOU behave the way you do!

[napadivya-blog]

“is not about making the world a peaceful place; it is about us being at peace with the world.”

Devdutt Pattanaik, Jaya: An Illustrated Retelling of the Mahabharata

[napadivya-blog]

It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live

Harry Potter

[napadivya-blog]

This Is Us

This generation has been bombarded with television shows about supernatural events, superhumans and elite private school children. Right in the midst of this came a small show about a family. The Pearsons are as normal as any family - read dysfunctional at some points but mostly sailing through.

I had seen no teaser or trailer before watching the first episode and am I so grateful about that decision because I was in for a pleasant and heart tugging surprise. The series is about the three Pearson siblings and the parents. It goes on to show problems any individual can face while growing up, while in a marriage or while being an adoptive child (sorry about the spoiler!). The problems are shown in a realistic manner with ineffable simplicity. Every episode touches your heart and sometimes rips it apart!

To everyone reading this review, here is my favorite quote from the show that brought big drops of tears rolling down my cheek, “there’s no lemon so sour that you can’t make something resembling lemonade”.

[napadivya-blog]

Karwaan

Everyone at some point has made a road trip plan with a bunch of friends. More often than not the plan has come down crashing. Either because you were too young, too poor or too old (think children crying and throwing tantrums). But have you ever heard of a road trip to exchange dead bodies? If you haven’t (I’m seriously hoping you haven’t) then Karwaan is the film for you!

There are three main characters in this film. Avinash, the usual creative stuck in a corporate job - the millennial’s cliche. Shaukat, the rumbustious friend of Avinash’s that offers to drive him to Kochi. And Tanya the angry, young teenager. What do they all have in common? Daddy issues. Through the film, these three people get through their respective issues. I mean, we can’t all go to Spain to figure out our lives, can we?

There are more than a few things that work for this film, the story, the actors and the wonderful dialogues. If you are looking for a feel good film for a lazy Sunday afternoon, look no further, watch Karwaan!

[napadivya-blog]

She pictured herself in a classroom with other girls her age. Mariam longed to place a ruler on a page and draw important-looking lines.

A Thousand Splendid Suns

[napadivya-blog]

“How easy it was to lie to strangers, to create with strangers the versions of our lives we imagined.”

Americanah

[napadivya-blog]

Padmaavat

I finally watched one of the most controversial films of the year. I’ve for the most part liked Sanjay Leela Bansali’s films but this one piqued my interest because of all the ongoing commotion.

Like all SLB films, Padmavati – yes, I’d like to call it that - had all the splendor and grandeur. Shahid Kapur’s night clothes were what I’d wear for my wedding. And Deepika Padukone’s low-key, day time jewelry were things I couldn’t afford. So pretty much a regular Sanjay Leela Bansali film.

Before watching the film, I read a few reviews about how the film was ‘too long’, ‘misogynistic’ and romanticizing Sati (Jauhar). What did I think? Yes, I agree the film was long. But any epic (noun not adjective) film is bound to be long. If the film was shorter and things happened in the blink of an eye, we’d have a problem about how it isn’t realistic. We are never satisfied!

Misogynistic, this is a tricky one. Let’s imagine the following situation. It is the year 3010 and they want to make a film about an event that happened in 2018. Would it be fair if they portrayed our world as fair? Would it be realistic if they said that men and women got equal pay? Would it be truthful if that film said women felt safe walking the streets any time of the day? If we are making a film about a different era, with a completely different society and way of living, how can we expect mindsets we ascribe to?

Finally, Sati (Jauhar). I didn’t for a moment think they romanticized Sati. I did think that Rajput’s put their pride and honor above everything (which really didn’t help them). But did Padmavati kill herself because of her love for her husband – Maharawal Ratan Singh? No. She, unfortunately, didn’t have too many choices. It was either dying or being raped and abused by her conqueror Allaudin Khilji.

Instead of all this, I’d suggest watching it for some wonderful acting. Ranveer’s narcissism, his childlike stubbornness and megalomaniac attitude. Shahid’s calmness, valor, gentleness and Rajput pride. Deepika’s strength, intelligence, breathtaking beauty and power. Jimmy's gender fluidity, his jealously and undying love for his Sultan! And finally, Aditi Rao Hydari, a gentle, beautiful soul caught in Khilji’s cuff.

[napadivya-blog]

Crazy Rich Asians

Disclaimer: This is not a film about the Ambanis. If it were, I would have watched a film about pre pre engagement parties and Nita Ambani dancing to Shubhaarambh.

So, what is this film about? It is nothing new or out of the ordinary. It takes the age old concept of ‘parampara vs pyaar’ and gives it a funny and Chinese twist. The film starts with Nick Young asking his girlfriend, Rachel Chu to come to Singapore with him. The rest of the film is about how Rachel finds out that Nick Young is ‘crazy ancestral rich’ and not the normal rich. Of course, this means that his mother doesn’t approve of Rachel and nor do the 10,000 other people living in Singapore (wait, what is Singapore’s population?).

The film does well because there are those sweet and bitter moments that different characters share. I personally loved Nick Young’s mother - Eleanor Young telling Rachel that she would ‘never be enough’ for her son. (Why do we have issues with the Chinese? Indian moms and Chinese moms are the same!) I also loved most of the scenes with Peik Lin, Rachel’s close friend from her college days. Peik Lin is boisterous, loud and very ‘new money’. One of my favorite dialogues of Peik Lin’s is, “she just thinks you’re some like unrefined banana. Yellow on the outside, and white on the inside.” PS: if you didn’t know, Indians raised outside are known as coconuts - brown on the outside, and white on the inside.

To all those people out there that think Chinese men and women are unattractive and uncultured, please go watch Crazy Rich Asians. All I can say is, “hubba hubba!”

[napadivya-blog]

I wondered if that was how forgiveness budded; not with the fanfare of epiphany, but with pain gathering its things, packing up, and slipping away unannounced in the middle of the night.

Kite Runner

[napadivya-blog]

Sultan

Every once in a while, when you are utterly bored, you end up doing something out of the ordinary. Sultan, was such an experience.

I walked into the theater not expecting much, maybe a few laughs at most. I had no clue that what awaited me was a film with complete disregard to women and their dreams. 

The film starts off with Salman Khan being a 30 year old with no direction in life. He meets Anushka Sharma and its love at first ‘fight’. He starts stalking her and she says she cannot marry a non-wrestler. Anushka is a wrestler training to go to the Olympics. He starts training (halfheartedly), they start hanging out and he introduces her as his girlfriend. She humiliates him and says she isn’t his girlfriend and she cannot marry someone with no direction. Suddenly, Salman takes wrestling so seriously he becomes the state champion in about 15 minutes. All he needed was one intense song that shows him working out. Life is easy when you are a Khan. Anyway, when Salman wins the state title, Anushka asks him to marry her. 

The film proceeds with the married couple taking part in international tournaments and winning titles. They finally get their selection letters to the Olympics. Only to find out that Anushka is pregnant. She decides to keep the child because Salman is so happy that she is pregnant. Somehow her dreams and her ambitions are thrown in the back. How Anushka took this decision in a few seconds is beyond my understanding. She takes the decision not because she wants the baby but because of her husband’s happiness. How is it that the husband completely forgets about his wife’s ambitions and dreams? He doesn’t ask her what she is thinking or going through. He takes it for granted that she will have the baby. 

The film then goes on to show how he becomes an arrogant wrestler, the couple lose their child and he gives up wrestling. His second chance in life comes knocking and he trains and wins the title to a pro league. During the tournament, he is severely injured meets Anushka and all mistakes are forgiven. Great. Happy ending for Salman. Wait, is this his reel or real life?

Now during the credits, they show that Anushka has started training again. Momentary happiness. A second later, they show Anushka in the hospital and the doctor telling Salman to distribute sweets. 

Conclusion is, the guy who starts wrestling to impress his lady love, makes it big. The girl who has been training her entire life, gives it all up for love. 

[napadivya-blog]

But you, you’re special to me. When I’m with you I feel something is just right. I believe in you. I like you. I don’t want to let you go.

Haruki Murakami

[thegabdonwrites]

We betray our mother tongues, for the languages of nations that will never fully accept us. We let the strangeness infest our mouths until we forget how to accommodate our original tongues.”

- mother tongue, f.gabdon (via thegabdonwrites)

[indavidual]

I simply existed today, and it was about as much as I could handle.

(via indavidual)

[napadivya-blog]

Cinema

Cinema to many people is a form of entertainment. A dream one can go into with spending very minimum. The happiness of good winning over evil, how often does that happen in reality? The devout lovers that spend eternity thinking of the other. The heroic sacrifice one makes for the greater good. The grey characters you end up falling in love with and subsequently questioning your ideals. An art form that goes above and beyond.

Being brought up far away from home, I struggled to understand where my loyalties lied. How was I sure what was home? Where was my heart after all? The answer came from a Mani Ratnam film - Roja (1992). There was a particular scene in which the protagonist jumps on the Indian flag, as the terrorists burn it. I felt almost provoked. A frenzied anger shot up. My face was burning, my heart racing, my palms sweating and a surprising love for the protagonist. I knew then. I knew where the heart was. 

Cinema for me hasn’t just been entertainment, it has been an anchor to home and almost an extension of self.

[napadivya-blog]

Princess Diaries

As you grow older, whenever you pick up an old book or listen to an old song, you are flushed with memories. You remember your life back then, reminiscent on how different things were. Similarly, as I was cleaning my bookshelf the other day, I found all of my Princess Diaries books. When I opened the book, I read Mia’s ramblings about her cat. How amazing it used to feel to read those ramblings. I also particularly remembered Grandmere’s way of saying Amelia. 

A friend of mine would say that Mia’s ramblings reminded her of the way I spoke about things - whiney and ungrateful for the most part. I was whiney about several things - math homework, lunch at school, waking up early, going to meet relatives during the summer and getting my parents to understand ‘my’ culture.

One thing you definitely don’t understand at that point is that those arguments, lunch break laughs and Princess Diaries books are all going to become a fond memory one day.