Made of dust and ivory ;

Narcissa Rhea Black Slytherin ; 6th yr ; Pureblood ; Neutral Death Eater

[morallyblack]

narcissistblack‌:

That’s what made her hate me. She knew that even when they were younger, and she often scolded Sirius herself for being reckless–it hadn’t been a secret just how much of an outcast Sirius had been to their family, and Narcissa had moved around their house like a ghost and heard everything. She was an observer, but she withheld everything to herself, bottled up with a tight lid out of fear for what she knew and what the consequences would be if she had anything to say. 

“Forced off?” She balked, gasp ringing off the walls around them. “I want to be married, Sirius! I want to have children and continue our legacy! I am not forced–I am my own person, mind you, even if my life has already been mapped out for me–why do–why do you and Meda both not understand that?!” She hadn’t meant to let Andromeda’s name fall off her lips, but she was frustrated and angry at the two of them for questioning her own methods and thoughts, as though they were poisonous and like falling into quicksand. “It’s safe this way! You had a choice, and you made it. You could’ve kept your head down–” Could’ve been like her with her own agenda and ability to choose little things in life that gave her pleasure without her family knowing. “You could’ve gotten out eventually with marriage and a family of your own.” That was her plan, wasn’t it? To leave hers with a different name, yet be privileged with the maiden name Black and new one Malfoy. 

His own arrange marriage he’d chosen to opt out of–fled from–claiming that he would’ve died on his own wedding day. “And now you’re going to be missing mine.” The sob wanted to tear itself from her throat, but she swallowed it back, her own gaze dropping to the stone slabs on the floor. Was it so easy for her to destroy his face from her memory? From her heart? He ran, he left, and he didn’t regret it. It was a slap to the face to hear, the pounding of her heart rushing to her ears. “Then…we have nothing more to discuss.” Her tone dropped octaves, plummeted with the decision to move forward as the rest of her family had. Sirius had chosen his side, and now Narcissa was left standing with the other. 

I want to be married, Sirius! The statement sent him back, one step away from Narcissa with his brows furrowed. She wanted this? She wanted this life that he had so easily thrown away? A part of him felt sick at the realization that Narcissa isn’t like her sisters, isn’t like him, but her own person caught in the middle of all of this. Why do you and Meda both not understand that?! Shaking his head, Sirius didn’t know what to say. “I didn’t realize that you actually – you want this? You want to marry Malfoy?” But that was the issue, wasn’t it? That he could never wrap his mind around being complaisant enough to follow through with their parents’ plans. To be comfortable in marrying someone for one reason and that reason not being for love. The reason being out of loyalty, for the future generations and a pureblood line. That was never in the cards for Sirius yet for Narcissa, it was all she had. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize that you believed your life to be safe.” He thought about the woman who occupied his mind, his heart, and how he would have never been happy marrying another. And how his family would have never approved of him marrying such a woman because of her so inferior birth. 

When Sirius left that awful home, his awful family, guilt didn’t hit him until hours later, when everything had calmed down enough for him to think about what he lost. He didn’t just lose parents who hated him or a house that felt like it was suffocating him for years now. He left a brother that he loved, cousins that he loved, and losing them proved to be a harder pill to swallow. And now you’re going to be missing mine. Sirius didn’t realize how much that statement would have hurt but it came from Narcissa and it was laced with a similar hurt in her voice. Even if Sirius stayed, standing by and watching his cousins marry some of the worst people he could think of, Narcissa with Malfoy and Andromeda to Lestrange. He wouldn’t have been able to stomach it. He didn’t have anything to say and it was clear that their conversation was coming to a close, the heaviness in his heart wouldn’t lift up as he sighed. “I guess so,” he spoke just as low as she did, looking at her with such a heavy sadness that it was painful, physically and emotionally. “You don’t have to listen to me, Narcissa, but take care of yourself, okay? Keep being happy and get the life you deserve.” With one last small smile, Sirius turned away from Narcissa, blinking away the stinging in his eyes as he would leave her be.

[narcissistblack]

END

[narcissistblack]

antonin dolohov·:

Breaking theBlack sisters was a cake walk for Antonin. One was fun, one was weak and easy, and one was stupid enough to think she held some sense. The third, the final—hewas looking at, some tilt of his head as he smiled softly onto the blonde.Surely, if Bella let him—he’d destroy dearest Narcissa. But in the light of it,he preferred her sister wrapped around his finger, and he wouldn’t relinquishthat fire so long as he held blood in his veins.

“Lucius is a boy, and you’re too deluded to seeotherwise, sweetheart. Don’t worry—we allgrow up eventually.” Her notion to question his protection, as he stood, handspocketed, approaching the third sister slowly. “Well—I protect those I believe worthy of being protected.” He murmured,low enough for her to hear. “Protect you all, no. But that’s for you to know and to never tell someone else. Because I would find out if you did.” He smiled widely. 

“I am that strong, love. I don’t take ashying to your dear sweet sister because she’s timid and weak like you. But youknew that, right…”

Her jaw clenched, uncertain why Antonin’s words rang some truth, herself naive and perhaps deluded and inexperienced to see. But Narcissa was more offended that Antonin dared question her chosen suitor, a person picked solely for her out of everyone her parents could have chosen. That was offending her family, wasn’t it? “You’d best to bite your tongue, Dolohov. Any dig at Lucius is now a dig at me and you’d do well not do so.” There was a rarity in Narcissa getting defensive, as cold as her icy orbs, not as powerful as Bellatrix or as stoic as Andromeda could be, a blend of the two perhaps when she grew up eventually. 

Worthy of being protected-- “What does that even mean?” She asked, having all but heard that her entire life and not having a clue. Of course, her family would protect one another, someone worthy wasn’t Sirius, but betrayal had never been taken likely with the Black family. “I speak on behalf of myself and my sister when I say we are not timid or weak. Who are you to question our power?” Was it whispers from Bellatrix? Had she been the one to deem them as such?

[narcissistblack]

rosamund nott·:

Rosamund smiled, ideas for gifts for her bridesmaids already in mind but only closer to the day of the wedding, more as a thank you than as a bribery to be there in the first place. “Ah, but see it was difficult to ask you with the rest of my party because I actually need your advice on that. Regarding your sisters and how much you feel they will want to be included. As Rodolphus’ bride, it would only be proper for me to involve Andromeda and if I ask two of you, I should ask all three. But, you see, I have never been as close to either of them as I am to you and if I am asking Alecto and my cousin, too, then eventually I reach a situation where I have more bridesmaids than guests.” A huge exaggeration, of course, but there was something about three bridesmaids, along with perhaps a little flower girl or two, that sounded better to her than five or more.

It fascinated her to see Narcissa’s expression as she pictured the wedding. Ros was all about the aesthetic and the artist in her had planned the details with beauty in mind but it had been a fairly recent image in her mind. She had never been one to dream about weddings, not one to fantasise about marriage at all. The dreamy look on Narcissa’s face suggested they differed there. “Have you a vision for yours and Lucius’ wedding?”

She considered Rosamund’s question, already envisioning a flattered Andromeda fulfilling the role per being asked and out of obligation being betrothed to the other Lestrange. Cold feet surely was the only thing preventing her sister from seeing how much potential her fiance had. “I know Andromeda would say yes if asked.” She answered then, not able to visualize Bellatrix screaming giddy to be a bridesmaid or any sort of happiness at the idea of holy matrimony. “But it couldn’t hurt to ask Bellatrix,” Maybe there was some sort of flattery in just being considered? “I think she’d forego the idea of ice blue for herself, however.” 

A faint blush crept across her cheeks at Rosamund’s question about her own wedding. Aware to not actually speak her truth and instead giving another what they wanted to hear. “Oh yes, I have many visualizations, themes, color ideas, it all really depends on the when. Ideally, I’d love a winter wedding myself, out in the snow. That or spring when the ivy is at peak greenery. It’s no wonder I was chosen to be Slytherin, green is another one of my favorite colors.”

[marvelsrunawayss-blog]

[narcissistblack]

bellatrix black·:

The castle was nothing but a cursed reminder that she’d been shackled to the expectations in which her parents had put into place. She was to remain pure, to remain enslaved in her would be hell for mere months before she’d been allowed to reign free. To watch blood fall from the sky if she’d so wished it. There was a darkness that loomed within her, a wickedness so demonic that she’d oft shielded it from her sisters. From those she’d sworn to protect. Unlike her blood traitor cousin, Bellatrix had no notion to ever abandon blood. For, it’d been thicker than anything, had it not? The beginning and end of every single action that she drew her sword by. Their blood defined them, it was something to be envied. It’d been a shame such a thing was wasted upon the likes of the Gryffindor scum, she’d thought. A pity he’d shared not only that but a name, enough to make her sick. 

She glides through the corridors and people had parted like that of the red sea, cowering in a fear that she’d managed to rule with an iron fist. It was what fed her, as if she herself had become something of a hooded figure, gaunt and skeletal as she’d sucked soul from those with whom she’d thought below her. Nothing had brought her more solace than knowing that it was fear that she’d instilled, that within the murmurs that surrounded her name it was hairs that rose on the back of ones neck, cowering vocals and trembling lips. She’d never quite been soft enough to relate to Narcissa, blonde and porcelain enough to be mistook as a doll. Surely her parents had treated the girl as such, giving her carelessly to the highest bidder –– Lucius Malfoy. She’d never quite been as understanding as Andromeda, then again she’d never quite allowed herself to mistake naivety for such. 

The honey suckle sweet vocals of her youngest sister ring through her ears and it’s upon heels in which Bellatrix turns. Lips pressed tightly, whilst protective, she’d also found herself distant if only because she’d known her her pleasure was their burden. “Have you been avoiding me, Narcissa?” It’s part of her curious nature, brows rising in question as she speaks. “One might believe such a thing, what with such a coincidence.” 

It seemed the sisters were scrutinized even more so with Sirius’ betrayal, not fearful they too would follow in his stead but that they would somehow destroy the family name with a trivial mistake. Druella’s letters were reminders, a constant warning that if Narcissa didn’t do everything in her power to secure the Malfoy lineage blending with theirs that she may as well remain at Hogwarts and never return to the house of Black. But unlike her siblings, Narcissa was blindly devout and believing with every fiber of her being that her family had her best interest at heart. Devout but not naive--she observed, listened and knew more than she let on, forever desperate to find a way to be her own person and not the doll passed around by her family. 

A doll that Bellatrix had wanted nothing to do with.

Like a new moon and the sun the two stood in stark contrast to one another, and Andromeda the middle between the two with them in her orbit. But how the new moon hid the sun during an eclipse Narcissa would always trust in Bellatrix’s strength and trusted she would be protected. “Why would I be avoiding you, Bellatrix?” As always she attempted the same callous nature, backside straightening, and her own brow raising. Someone she could never hope to catch up to, a queen wearing a crown of thorns. “I haven’t a reason to--if anything I blame my Prefect duties from delaying our chance meetings.” A lie, Bellatrix had been correct in Narcissa avoiding her--since she’d received the very Death Eater cloak she was wearing from Rosamund during the break, worried about Bellatrix’s reaction. If any--perhaps that was the worst of all, not even being worth any sort of reaction from her own sister.

[wildblues]

–– she was very beautiful and kind, but sad.

[witchinghour]

The Lovers (1958) dir. Louis Malle

[narcissistblack]

sirius black‌:

“I’ve never been one to keep my head down and you know that. My mother knew that and that’s what made her hate me.” Never one for obedience. It was too clear at a young age. As Narcissa spoke, practically yelling at him, making it seem that she isn’t in a cage, Sirius wanted to laugh. But he bit his tongue, shaking his head as this was the same ridiculous notion that they all had. Every single one of them stuck in a pureblooded home, force to think the same way as their parents and the parents before them. Stuck in this archaic thinking. “You are, Narcissa! You’re caged, every single one of you. Forced off to marry and the only thing expected of you are children, especially male children, and fuck if you get a say or thought in any of it.” Why couldn’t any of them see that? Why couldn’t they see there was more to life than having to carry on a pure line of blood? “And you could have been like me. You all could have. But you felt some sort of loyalty to people who only saw you as a tool, not a person. I wouldn’t have–” he stopped himself because his thought was wrong. He had already left them.

I’m not allowed to speak to you. The words were expected and yet, he flinched at them. Already having said enough, clearly hurting Narcissa with what he had to say and she did the same in return, even if they didn’t mean it. You left us. The words made him look down, almost with shame filling him despite never feeling ashamed for his decision. The Potters had been the only choice for him, the first glance at a real family and familial love. “I couldn’t pretend any longer that I could have lived in that house, that I could have survived in that family. I was to be married off too, you know, to Alecto. I would have been poisoned on our wedding day.” The thought made him shudder, especially when his heart so clearly belonged to another. “If this is so hard for you to deal with then why don’t we make this easier on you. I ran, I left, and I don’t regret it for a second.” Even though it hurt. It hurt to remember what he lost while he gained, who he hurt as he loved and that his decision wasn’t as easy as he made it out to be. “And I ran to my friends, to my family.”

That’s what made her hate me. She knew that even when they were younger, and she often scolded Sirius herself for being reckless--it hadn’t been a secret just how much of an outcast Sirius had been to their family, and Narcissa had moved around their house like a ghost and heard everything. She was an observer, but she withheld everything to herself, bottled up with a tight lid out of fear for what she knew and what the consequences would be if she had anything to say. 

“Forced off?” She balked, gasp ringing off the walls around them. “I want to be married, Sirius! I want to have children and continue our legacy! I am not forced--I am my own person, mind you, even if my life has already been mapped out for me--why do--why do you and Meda both not understand that?!” She hadn’t meant to let Andromeda’s name fall off her lips, but she was frustrated and angry at the two of them for questioning her own methods and thoughts, as though they were poisonous and like falling into quicksand. “It’s safe this way! You had a choice, and you made it. You could’ve kept your head down--” Could’ve been like her with her own agenda and ability to choose little things in life that gave her pleasure without her family knowing. “You could’ve gotten out eventually with marriage and a family of your own.” That was her plan, wasn’t it? To leave hers with a different name, yet be privileged with the maiden name Black and new one Malfoy. 

His own arrange marriage he’d chosen to opt out of--fled from--claiming that he would’ve died on his own wedding day. “And now you’re going to be missing mine.” The sob wanted to tear itself from her throat, but she swallowed it back, her own gaze dropping to the stone slabs on the floor. Was it so easy for her to destroy his face from her memory? From her heart? He ran, he left, and he didn’t regret it. It was a slap to the face to hear, the pounding of her heart rushing to her ears. “Then...we have nothing more to discuss.” Her tone dropped octaves, plummeted with the decision to move forward as the rest of her family had. Sirius had chosen his side, and now Narcissa was left standing with the other. 

[narcissistblack]

lucius malfoy·:

WHEN: January 18th, 2:39pm WHERE: Slytherin Common Room WHO: Lucius & @narcissistblack·

“Brilliant. Just the person I was looking for.” Lucius Malfoy looked like he was a man on a mission. He wasn’t talking to anyone in particularly— just stopped off guard when he found the person he had been searching for the past twenty or so minutes. When one looked at the Slytherin they likely assumed he was the type who thought of their birthday as a national holiday. Anastasia Malfoy used to throw her only child extravagant parties when he used to be at home for them still. One could also argue the woman just liked the excuse to throw a party, but no— she certainly treated the day as a holiday. Lucius had already received two letters and several presents from his mother, but Abraxas…not a word. He hadn’t wished Lucius a ‘Happy Birthday’ since the boy was young enough to believe there was cause for celebration. However, for someone who was usually in a foul mood on that particular day Lucius looked in well enough spirits. 

“Miss Black,” he greeted, tossing a smile the younger Slytherin’s way. “As it is my birthday and I am to be your future husband—” He may not quite celebrate his own unless his mum was present to make him, but he didn’t mind using the excuse on Narcissa. She had no knowledge he ignored the day every other year. “—I have came to claim my gift. Your company. This afternoon— if you have no other preexisting arrangements, that is.”

Narcissa hadn’t expected to converse with Lucius today, or really on any day that wasn’t planned or prepared for, so when he said that she was the person he was looking for, there was a thrill and a swell of pride that fluttered through her chest. She was doing her best but according to her mother, it wasn’t enough without official proof like a wedding date. Was she really doing ‘everything she could’? But Narcissa had done her research and knew what today was and what it meant--Lucius’ birthday. 

She felt herself smile at the words future husband, the gravity of them enough to at least internally confirm with herself that yes, she and Lucius were to be married, even if Druella wasn’t around to hear it. “I suppose this means I can return your other birthday gift since the pleasure of my company is priceless.” Another gift that was just upstairs and Narcissa had been waiting for the right opportunity to give it to him. She stepped forward, indicating that yes, she was his for the afternoon. It was a chance to get to know Lucius, though she would’ve preferred the chance to have done things her own way. Circumstances that weren’t controllable, but Narcissa was content in letting him lead today. “No other arrangements worthy of my time. What would you like to do on this special day?” 

[narcissistblack]

brenton avery·:

“Ooh, scary,” he said, mockingly. Brenton had never been one to respect authority and Prefects were no different. What were a few House points or detentions, to somebody who cared nothing about the House Cup? In fact, her bringing it up was a sure-fire way for him to act out. “Professor McGonagall,” he said, words dripping with false self-importance, “said that there had been a potion dropped and it’s still not all cleaned up. Somebody went to the Hospital Wing.” He said the last sentence in a whisper, like it was huge gossip to pass along. In fact, the entire story was bullshit, as many things out of Brenton’s mouth often were.

Narcissa held her tongue, not quite as quick with it as Bellatrix or Andromeda when the occasion called for it, but she could cut someone down if she needed to. But usually they weren’t worth the wasted breath and Avery was one of them. He answered finally, and it did chalk up to a waste of time. “How dull. And I suppose Professor McGonagall put you of all people in charge of policing the hall.” She didn’t ask the question, Avery’s antics were signature and she knew better than to believe him. It wasn’t like she’d rat out one of her own, Narcissa had taken on the Prefect title for the power and privilege. 

[narcissistblack]

rosamund nott·:

There was a definite advantage to having so many friends in Slytherin. Her younger cousin had let her in, almost too happy to be invited into the wedding considering the strains between the two branches of their family and Rosamund made her way from the third year dormitory up to the sixth to find Narcissa. Part of her had wanted to keep up the pretence of last term that there was no engagement which might tie her down but that was too much to ask after the New Year’s Eve party. Everybody seemed to have found out, now, and the calibre of dress most of them were considering took time to make.

“Not a specific date, but it will be during the holidays next Winter. You will be a bridesmaid, won’t you? I’m thinking ice blue. As well as having a little dress shopping day over Easter.” There was more Rosamund wanted to talk to Narcissa about, but she felt it was best to talk wedding first.

“Of course I’ll be a bridesmaid, though I would prefer in the future a gorgeous arrangement with you popping the question to me and the rest of your party.” Her expression was serious, but Rosamund had been around Narcissa enough to know when the girl was teasing. She relished in gifts, and her fellow blonde had been one who hadn’t disappointed in the years of knowing her. “Winter with ice blue, that’s hauntingly beautiful. And you’ll wear crimson lipstick, won’t you? It’ll stand out shockingly against your fair complexion, ice blue dresses surrounding you like snowflakes.” Narcissa sighed dreamily, her own wedding one she’d been planning since she was a little girl and her mother told her she’d marry the right man chosen for her. 

[runawaysbish]

[narcissistblack]

@andromeduhblack, @morallyblack

[bob-belcher]

[wildblues]

VIRGINIA GARDNER AS HARPER BENNING IN DOLLY PARTON’S HEARTSTRINGS “SUGAR HILL” (2019)

[narcissistblack]

bertram aubrey·:

where: Great Hall or Library or Gryffindor Common Room when: January 11 - 15, 1978 who: Bertram Aubrey and anyone 

After all the rumors about the four older Gryffindors - and arriving at school late to boot - Bertram couldn’t believe that the faculty is just letting them assimilate back with the students. Would there be no explanations? No clarifications of any sort regarding why exactly the Marauders entered the campus a good three days before everyone else did? These thoughts have been plaguing Bertram for days and he can’t help that something about it should be done. Surely, he wasn’t the only one thinking about it.

“Hey,” he turned to his seatmate out of the blue. “Can I ask? What do you think about James still being the Head Boy?”

A brow cocked in the direction of Bertram, questioning why he was speaking to her when all they would do was go about their Prefect duties on an every day basis. But the subject of Potter was brought up and Narcissa felt compelled to express her opinion. After all, Bertram had asked, why would she be cruel in denying him of her honeyed words? “He who is present at a wrongdoing and does not lift a hand to prevent it is as guilty as the wrongdoers.” She said vaguely, allowing the words to sink in before continuing. “Potter has been Head Boy and done nothing to prevent any of the chaos and carnage that’s been going on. If anything, it’s only piled up since he accepted his duties--it has to make you consider he’s a culprit, and I’m glad they’re finally questioning him.”

[narcissistblack]

brenton avery·:

Where: Hogwarts corridor Who: Brenton && open

He was sat on a windowsill, one leg jigging repetitively so that his foot kept hitting the wall and picking away the peeling paint from the window frame with a frenzied focus which was broken by a high-pitched squeak and some movement out the corner of his eyes. He cast a lazy hex at a mouse, almost hitting someone who just happened to be passing at the same time.

“I wouldn’t go down that way if I were you,” he said in a sing-song voice. 

She halted in her steps, annoyance creeping forward with Brenton’s tone and having been bumped. “I’d remind you that I’m your Prefect,” Her tone warned, shifting her attention onto him before a smirk curled on her lips and act all but dropped. “But I am curious to know why.” 

[narcissistblack]

Location: Slytherin Dormitory Tagged: @nottsoinnocent​

Absolute rubbish the chaos that followed the appearance of the Dark Mark, the additional hours for the Prefects to patrol the castle and ensure the safety of the toddling ducklings. The accused four and only one of them she was confident had nothing to do with it, only one that she was concerned for and the rest content to be expelled or exiled themselves. Narcissa knew who she would protect, who would protect her, and everyone else was fodder. The survival of the fittest was best displayed in moments of fear. She could be stronger, but where was she to start? Not a full initiate of the Death Eaters and only aware of their existence, and appreciative that Rosamund Nott understood this. 

“Have you and Lestrange set a date yet? My seamstress needs at least six month’s notice to ensure every detail is perfect.”