Incorrect New Girl quotes

Here to satisfy your new girl needs. I post when I remember this exists. Side Blog. Main: acourtofglassandfandoms

[newgirlincorrec]

Schmidt: Are you busy? Nick: No. Schmidt: Want to do something? Nick: Why would you try to ruin this for me?

[newgirlincorrec]

Winston: I let my cat drink the bathtub water while I was in it. Priest: Once again, kind of weird, but not a sin.

[newgirlincorrec]

Cop: What are your names? Nick: Don't tell them, Schmidt. Cop, writing: Schmidt... Nick: Crap. Schmidt: Nice going, Nick. Cop: Schmidt: Uh oh.

[newgirlincorrec]

Schmidt: Is anyone going to tell me what's going on in here?! Jess: It's kind of complicated, but Nick- Schmidt: Got it. Forget I asked.

[newgirlincorrec]

Jess: Hey. Nick: Hey? Jess: I can't sleep. :/ Nick: I can. Goodnight.

[newgirlincorrec]

*when a child starts crying in public* Jess: *tries to make the child laugh* Cece: *tries to play a game with the child to make them calm down* Schmidt: *gives detailed instructions to the parents* Winston: *cries with the child* Coach: *ignores the child* Nick: *is the reason why the child is crying*

[newgirlincorrec]

Jess: If I was sick, could I do this?

Nick: What are you doing?

Jess: Cartwheels, am I not doing them?

[newgirlincorrec]

Nick: Is the pink panther a lion?

Jess: Say that again but slower.

Nick: I don’t get it.

Jess: He’s a PANTHER.

Nick: Is that a type of lion?

Jess: No, it’s a fucking panther.

Nick: googles panther They aren’t pink?

Jess: AND LIONS ARE?!

[newgirlincorrec]

Cece: You deserve a reward for putting up with me. Schmidt: You are my reward. *meanwhile* Nick: You deserve a reward for putting up with me. Jess: True, you can be really difficult at times.

[newgirlincorrec]

Winston: Oh, fiddlesticks. Nick: Look, I understand this is a tense situation, but let's watch the fucking language.

[newgirlincorrec]

Nick: *sneaking in through his window*

Schmidt: *turning in his chair and flicking the light one* You want to tell me where you've been all night?

Nick: I was with Jess?

Jess: *turning in her chair* Wanna try again?

[newgirlincorrec]

Nick: I'm sick and tired of being called "mortal" like, you don't know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet. Stop making assumptions. It's rude.

[newgirlincorrec]

Schmidt: Met a dumbass today. Awful.

Nick: You looked in a mirror?

Schmidt: Someday you will have to answer for your actions and god may not be so merciful.

[newgirlincorrec]

Nick: Watcha doin?

Winston: Stealing the neighbour's cat.

Nick: Scandalous.

Nick: Can I help?

[newgirlincorrec]

Jess: When I said bring me something back from the beach I meant like a conch shell!

Nick: *Struggling to hold a seagull* Fucking say that next time!

[newgirlincorrec]

Schmidt: And here we see Nick and Winston in their natural habitat. Texting eachother variations of the word "garlic bread" to try to make eachother laugh.

Nick: Gaelic bread.

Winston: Grueling brad.

Nick: Ha ha, glamorous beans.

[newgirlincorrec]

Jess: Why would anyone want to harm Nick?

Schmidt: Maybe because they met him?