Hayden had the vague inclination that Jay found his nerves amusing. Somehow, his pride wasn’t too wounded by it. Every rule that Hayden had ever made for himself and lived by, Jay had somehow managed to be the exception to it. Not always, for he could recall plenty of arguments the two of them had, when Hayden would show up with another bruise, guard up and hackles raised, spitting his anger at Jay as he demanded the other boy just leave it alone. For the most part though, Hayden had allowed himself Jay, Jay, Jay over and over again, even when he knew he shouldn’t.
He raised an eyebrow at the other man’s snappy tone. Perhaps there was a time where he might have flinched at how sharp it sounded. As a teenager, a tone like that usually meant a fist would follow. But Jay had helped him learn that wasn’t always the case, and he knew how ill-tempered the other man often was as a teenage boy. Nothing Hayden couldn’t fix with a few well-placed kisses, but that was hardly an appropriate solution right now. His cheeks flushed at the thought.
Instead, he just huffed out another laugh and rubbed the back of his neck. At least they could both acknowledge the situation was weird.
That, it seemed, was where they stopped viewing this whole scenario in the same vein of weird. Hayden had thought he’d disrupted the other man’s day completely. It wasn’t every day you clocked into work and then immediately had your ex-something thrust upon you.
Evidently, Jay thought differently.
Hayden’s eyes widened at Jay’s words. The last thing he’d been expecting to hear was an apology from Jay. Jay, who Hayden had inadvertently put into danger through the selfish act of loving him. He’d been so out of his mind with affection for the other man that he hadn’t realised how much he’d been putting him in harm’s way, up until his father had found them together and dragged Hayden out by his hair. He’d left Jay exposed, vulnerable to the violent side of a man who’d never been able to understand just how deeply Hayden felt about Jay. As far as Hayden was concerned, there weren’t enough sorries in the world to make up for that, so he didn’t like the idea of Jay giving him one and deepening his debt.
True, when Hayden had finally allowed his injuries to heal and finally went out in search of Jay at all their old meeting points, he’d thought that Jay had finally had enough and ghosted him. Not that he’d even blamed him at the time. Hayden wasn’t a brave enough person to have not known he’d have done the same. Then, he found out what had really happened to Jay and nothing had ever been the same again.
“Jay, you have nothing to be sorry for. I mean, I’m the one that put you in that situation and then, what happened to you was…” His voice cracked. It was impossible for it not to, not when he thought about the ordeal Jay had been through. Media training only got you so far, and that didn’t extend to keeping a straight face when you thought about the boy you’d loved for half your life being thrown in jail.
“Shit,” Hayden whispered, before he stepped forward and threw his arms around Jay.
He pulled the other man tightly against him, squeezing his eyes shut. He could feel how much Jay had filled out over the years, how Hayden’s lean frame was so slight in comparison, even if he did still have an inch or two on him. His thumb idly stroked Jay’s shoulder through the material of his coveralls - which were probably smudging grease against Hayden’s shirt. Not that he particularly cared.
“I’m the one who’s sorry,” Hayden said. For once, the words didn’t stick in his throat. He wasn’t apologising for getting under his father’s feet or for a crash that wasn’t his fault. This time, he meant it.
stormborns
yousharknotpass
snowghoul
theartofmadeline
kaledo-art
andulkaphoto
vaporwave
areudirty
