Minors DNI @nightskye-wfsn - Tumblr Blog

oh no no I'm not saying he doesn't have sex and plenty of it I'm saying when he's feeling frustrated and other people seem occupied france is his only choice, if he's not available, he just has to wait

Hmmm disagree. I think Arthur is a functional sex addict. Do I need to write like an agenda thing?

Watch out... kinda cracky

A week in the life of one Arthur Kirkland AKA Erotic Ambassador!

Monday

Woke up in Spain's bed, forgot what happened last night. Man is an octopus did not want to let me go until I grabbed his dick. Then he blamed me for getting hard and me not taking care of him. I fucked him to shut him up. Was late for the meeting.

Germany reprimanded Spain for being late and raised an eyebrow at me as he had not expected me to be late as well. I rolled my eyes. France remarked that the hickey on my neck was a beautiful colour. Would have punched him if Germany didn't order me to sit down. I'll deal with the prat later.

Belgium had offered me a little mirror and some skin care products to take care of the blue spot on my neck. She told me I owe her a drink, I asked her if she was free later and she said yes and that I could hit her up and tell her where and when to meet. I like Belgium, she's always been such a sweet but feisty woman.

Meeting ended and Germany asked to speak with me. Said my behaviour during the meeting was unacceptable. I told him I was sorry, and that if there was anything I could do for him, in order to make up for it, I'd do so in a heartbeat.

I gave him a hand job while leaning against his desk as he seemed very stressed and in dire need of one. Was not actually too hard to convince once given the health benefits.

Afterwards we laughed about the fact that 'Handy' means something completely different in our respective languages. Note to self: Germany is so much more tolerable post-orgasm.

Walking out I encountered Francis who remarked with glee that while my make-up skills had improved since drag started being popular in my country it still couldn't hide it completely. I asked him if he wanted a matching one. He raised an eyebrow reminding me that we needed to get back to the meeting hall in 25 minutes. I asked him if he was too old for a challenge?

France and I were late for the meeting. Germany saw us and rolled his eyes. Belgium complimented Francis' beautiful purple mark on his neck. Belgium did not offer Francis her mirror and make up. Belgium is getting another drink on my tab tonight.

Meeting ends, I go home to my hotel to freshen up, and do a bit of reading and paperwork as I had not yet gotten the time. Meanwhile arrange the meeting with Belgium later.

Meet with Belgium for dinner, she played 'footsie' with me under the table and I enjoyed myself. Paid for dinner. I am a gentleman after all. Belgium remarked so as well. We had a lovely walk in the park, which happened to be deserted. Feisty woman, she pushed me against a tree and made out with me. Dragged me to her hotel and had her way with me. She told me I could sleep over, and I was too tired to move so I agreed. Would probably regret it in the morning but "yolo" as America likes to say.

Tuesday

Woke up with a mouth around my dick. I came surprisingly fast. I apologised to the lady, and made up to her by making her come under the shower afterwards. I am a gentleman.

We got dressed and she told me she had a brunch appointment with Hungary later but that she enjoyed our tryst. She informed me that she had some new toys at home that we could try out if I'm ever in Brussels again. Note to self: Hit up Belgium when in Brussels

Funnily enough I met my dear lad, Canada, in the corridor on my way out. He seemed to come out of the room Belgium had told me yesterday was assigned to her brother, I'll admit I asked the lad to join me for brunch pretending not to know, with the plan to ask him about it during. Do I believe I am evil? No, just a man looking out for my child. Note to self: I should speak with the Dutch cradle robber later.

Brunch with Matthew was wonderful, managed to ask him what he was doing in this hotel as I thought he was sleeping in the same one as his brother a bit up north in the city. He admitted he slept at the Dutchman's place after having gotten drunk at the bar. Pretended like I didn't figure out what actually happened.

Travelled to the airport and checked in with luggage, had no issues and boarded the plane well.

Funny coincidence. I was seated next to the Cradle Robber on the flight back to Europe. I subtly let him know I was aware of what had transpired with Canada at the hotel. He told me, he was aware of what I did with his sister.

We thus decided to drop the subject.

45 minutes before arrival he informed me he had not yet had the opportunity to join the Mile High Club. I asked him what that had to do with me. He grinned at me and I'll admit, I am a weak man.

Airplane bathrooms have not grown larger since the last time I have done this. My arse hurt for the remaining 25 minutes of landing. Note to self: bring packets of lube that will not be removed by airport security.

Dutch bastard had the decency to apologise and tell me he would make it up to me at my hotel. I remain impressed by this cheapskate's ability to invite himself and leach of everyone around him as I suspect he had no place to stay upon arrival.

Vincent, as I was allowed to call him, sucked me off in the hotel elevator. The ride was not long enough for me to come but it was exhilarating.

Ordered room service and he insisted on ordering strawberries covered in chocolate with crème fraiche. Initially I was annoyed with him for wasting my money, but when he made me come with just his fingers and then fed me said strawberries, I'll admit I must have seemed very docile.

Fell asleep with him on my chest. Was pleasant, I'll admit.

Wednesday

Woke up and Vincent was gone. Should have known. Not surprising, I am of course not upset.

Felt better when I found a note telling me he had a meeting with some ambassador and that he had fun and that we should do this more often.

Open my calendar and see that I too have a meeting with my good friend Portugal, luckily it is only in the meeting and thus I fill my day with some paperwork and some light reading to keep up to date with my work.

Francis sent me a nude around 4PM, to ask me what I thought of the new lingerie he bought. I told him it looked nice, and asked him if he was going to wear that underneath his suit the next time we had a meeting. He just sent me a wink emoji and I spent ten minutes wondering if he was just being cheeky before he called me, telling me he was disappointed I hadn't picked up on the fact he wanted to sext. I told him, we could still phone sex. This seemed to satisfy the French bastard and we had an enjoyable time.

We reminisced about the old days where this all needed to be done with letters and thus took way longer than the hour we had spent on it. I told him he was a nostalgic fool, upon which he blew me a kiss and ended our call, but not before telling me to look forward to next meeting. Note to self: Investigate Francis' undergarments next meeting.

I finished up some more paperwork before meeting up with Portugal at the restaurant. We discussed business for an hour, discussing everything that needed to be discussed as fast as possible so that we could finally start changing our water to stronger stuff. I like Portugal, I still enjoy my time with him like I did when we were but boys.

After the restaurant we went to a niche little pub I remembered we once went to decades ago. I paid for the first few drinks and Port paid for a couple of drinks, I lost count after a while. At some point he looked at me with that look and then went to the bathroom.

I followed him and that's when he pushed me against the wall and snogged the ever-loving shit out of me. Telling me it had been way too long, I agreed with him but asked him if he really wanted to do so in this filthy bathroom?

He fucked me against the sink, assuring me that this was the most hygienic place of the whole pub. He was pressing all the good buttons so I did not really care at that point.

He dragged me back to his hotel, I was quite drunk I'll admit.

Remember having a wonderful time.

Thursday

Woke up with Portugal sprawled across my body like an octopus. Snorted, realising he was just like his brother. Note to self: never ever tell any of the brothers this.

We had gentle morning sex. Was nice.

Had breakfast together. I had English breakfast and he had an avocado bagel admitting to me that he liked this new human trend. That's when he asked me if I was going to the dance/ball soiree organised by Austria tonight.

I had forgotten. Note to self: Start writing things down better!

Portugal who had a meeting with some ambassador. I had nothing to do so I decided to go to the clothes shop to get myself a suit for the party tonight.

There I met none other than Prussia testing out suits. He noticed me and smirked seeing me there asking if I had forgotten too, I laughed and felt a bit better about having forgotten.

The man turned a nice shade of red when I complimented his attire. Gilbert looked good in the three piece suit. Said he was just testing it ironically. I said he should also buy it and wear it ironically He stuck his tongue out at me but I did see him telling the staff member to put it to the side.

Chose a couple of suits, tested them out, noticed Prussia had decided to stay to judge mine. I suspect he had tried to embarrass me, but honestly it does something to one’s ego to have another person be speechless when one comes out.

Gilbert said something about there being an issue with the suit and that he would help me fix it inside the changing room.

Got sucked of in changing room, was hard to not make any noises and I’m sure the staff were aware of what we were doing. Just hope having bought multiple suits made up for the fact.

Invited him over to my hotel room to “test out more suits”

Were late for the party. Note to self: Fashionably late doesn’t work when it’s fairly obvious what you were doing.

In any case, hadn’t eaten yet so we decided to raid the banquet. Francis was there and joined us explaining what exactly we were eating in detail as if we were cavemen who had no knowledge of decent food.

Nearing midnight it had become pretty clear to us that someone spiked the drinks. I suspect America and Francis to be responsible although Russia was definitely looking guilty.

Friday

Past midnight, I was not completely drunk yet, having only had two glasses however others weren’t fairing so well. I noticed I had not greeted the host and hostess of the celebration and decided now was a perfect occasion before I was going to take my leave for the night.

I greeted Hungary first with a kiss on her hand, like the good old days before turning to Austria and thanking him for being a gracious host.

Prussia had joined me just while I was telling Austria that he was one lucky man with a wink towards Erzsébet. The man must have been quite drunk because he said “that’s one socially acceptable way to tell someone you’d like to bang their wife.”

I remember being mortified and glaring at the man who just cackled and walked away. An arm on my shoulder stopped me from running after the man, “actually Arthur...”

Never in my life would I have thought I’d ever have to send Gilbert of all people a bouquet of flowers for one of the kinkiest threesomes in my life.

Hungary and I smoked a cigar together while her husband just read a book. His wrists were still red and he was occasionally rubbing over them while he read. It was very peaceful which was strange to, as if we hadn’t spend the last three hours having sex in various positions while he was tied to the bed.

I was waiting for them to tell me if I was allowed to stay in their bed, when there was a knock on the door. Austria moved and let in a clearly drunk but tired Prussia who fell face first on the bed, immediately falling asleep at our legs.

“Now we can sleep,” Roderich just said, with a small smile, flicking off the light. I was tired so I slept like a baby.

It was only around midday when we woke up again that I realised how very strange the situation was. Hungary seemed to be spooning Prussia from behind, who was drooling on Austria’s chest. I sat up and Austria told me he would make us all breakfast.

While he was away his wife woke up and told us she wanted us to make out and have sex in front of her. We asked her why. She said she thought it was hot. Gilbert shrugged and ask if I was fine with it. I was.

Austria came back inside with some freshly backed goods and tea and coffee for us and set it on the table in the room. He did not even react that much to the fact I was fucking their lover, telling us we better hurry or it was going to get cold. His wife told him to enjoy the show, and he responded that he couldn’t due to Gilbert moaning like some common whore.

I snorted and suggested he could shut him up. Hungary and Austria looked at each other and decided that wasn’t so bad a plan.

I had to go home at some point due to a short conference call with my prime minister.

The moment I finished the conference I got a call from France asking if it was true that I had had a foursome with our hosts of the evening and Prussia. I told him it was none of his business and he laughed, asking for details.

France was still in the city so I met with him to get dinner together.

Afterwards he dragged me back to his hotel as he assured me it was fancier than his.

It was.

I told him I was too tired to do anything anymore but he told me it was fine and we could just cuddle and watch a movie. We did and I had a wonderful time. We emptied the entire hotel fridge and then ordered some more. I remember falling asleep on his chest after he told me one of those stories that despite having heard them a million times still make me laugh. Note to self: Never admit to the man that you love him.

Saturday

At 8 there was a short call between France and Germany for which France briefly had to get out of bed.

When finished he told me he had to have some business with Germany and that they were going to grab lunch together. Francis told me I was allowed to come and I hesitated. France then shrugged and said he had already told Ludwig I was going to be there and I sighed. I did not mind the man but I just hoped that unlike France he was not aware of what I did with his brother the night from Thursday to Friday.

When we were done making lunch plans we went back to bed and slept till 11am.

It appeared Ludwig wasn’t up to date on what I did with his brother and lunch was good. I had a simple salad with some soup.

Throughout lunch I became aware of Ludwig turning more and more red as time went on and being a little flustered. I frowned at Ludwig and asked him multiple times if everything was alright. He just nodded and looked away.

France was wearing a suspicious grin and at some point I realised something was up. I pretended to drop a napkin and dove under the table for it, just in time to see Francis retract his hands from where they had been rubbing Germany’s thigh.

I came up once more and frowned at Francis who just shrugged. Meanwhile Ludwig looked like he was trying to melt into the ground.

I raised an eyebrow at Francis who just winked at me. I rolled my eyes.

After having finished I bid both of them farewell as I still had to catch up on some work. Ludwig nodded, understanding, and complimenting my diligence. Francis rolled his eyes and planted a soft kiss on my lips, making the German’s eyes widen. I was flustered too. “Please join us, we will be quick,” Francis promised, not sure if it was to me or to Germany.

I’m a weak man.

Germany is apparently a weak man.

In the end it did not matter, what Francis wants Francis gets. He swore it was the best threesome of his life. Of course it was as he did not have to do any of the work.

After having joined Ludwig in the shower while Francis took a nap, I decided to leave a note for Francis and kissed Ludwig goodbye.

I still managed to do some paperwork, but not as much as I wanted to because my thoughts kept going back to what had transpired that afternoon.

In the evening I was asked by my brothers to meet up once for dinner and discuss some UK events and politics. Dreadful affair.

Afterwards, we got quite drunk, it wasn’t really eventful.

Sunday

Sunday morning I woke up on the ground next to the sofa of the house we had met up with my brothers. At least one of them had had the decency to cover me with a blanket.

Had breakfast with Scotland, who spend his time ranting about something stupid. Said bye to brothers who went to church.

Went home and there I spend most of the day catching up to work I was unable to do due to being “preoccupied”

In the evening I get a call from Spain asking if I wanted to join, him, Prussia and Francis on a pub-crawl.

I said yes, as I finished catching up on all the work I was supposed to do.

After pub 3 or 4 and my 7th or 8th drink, I’ll admit I do not remember much.

I remember having done karaoke night.

I remember having bought drinks for everyone.

Might have vomited in Spain’s plants. unsure.

Did end up in bed with all three of them.

We didn’t have sex. Maybe we shall tomorrow morning?

I’m a weak man. Note to self: Don’t do this on a Sunday evening.

--- and the cycle continues