ind. priv. sel. low-activity MARTY MIK.ALSKI of THE CABI.N IN THE WOODS. paranoia fueled by dru (she/her, 21+). RULES COMING SOON. non-rp blogs, please don’t interact. vehemently anti-whed*n. also found @drunivers.
RMH
trying on a metaphor

Andulka

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

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untitled

bliss lane
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

oozey mess
ojovivo
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Not today Justin
Keni
YOU ARE THE REASON

pixel skylines
sheepfilms
Sade Olutola

Kiana Khansmith

Origami Around
Game of Thrones Daily
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@nihiliski
ind. priv. sel. low-activity MARTY MIK.ALSKI of THE CABI.N IN THE WOODS. paranoia fueled by dru (she/her, 21+). RULES COMING SOON. non-rp blogs, please don’t interact. vehemently anti-whed*n. also found @drunivers.
OUR PATIENCE IS WANING (is this entertaining?) THERE GOES MY MIND !
decided that marty is bi & ace.
90slash:
@nihiliski ♡ ‘ d !
❝ you know that part in scary movies when somebody does something really stupid and everyone hates them for it? this is it. ❞
“that feels kinda harsh, man.” marty doesn’t let it get to him -- he doesn’t really know this mickey very well, and sure, let’s make fun of the weed guy. whatever. “why would ghost, uh, what’s his name? ghostman? why would he wanna kill me, dude? what’d i do?” he nods sagely, comforted by his own logic. “i’m not even familiar with his lore -- buddy, i couldn’t find woodsberg on a map.”
marty blows out a stream of smoke. “listen, you do you, buddy. but i’m not going to cloister myself just because some edward butt-munch cosplayer might be skulking about. you only live once, right?”
marty’s favorite ‘scary’ movie is probably beetlejuice. it’s not that he won’t watch ‘actual’ horror movies, it’s just that he judges movies entirely based on the good memories he has associated with them and nothing to do with their content. sidenote: he’s actually the worst person to watch any movie with because he’ll talk during the entire thing, not even about the movie, just about whatever’s on his mind that day.
also if anyone wants to write the other cabin characters .... hi.
okay i’ve decided that marty’s engineering knowledge came from working with/following around his electrician uncle when he was a kid. marty’s parents (both lawyers) kind of looked down on this uncle for having a blue-collar job, but he and marty were always really close, until he died of a heart attack when marty was 16. in college, marty was majoring in psychology (somewhat due to parental pressure, somewhat due to not knowing what he wanted to do with his life, somewhat so he could take classes with his friends).
like for memes.
8 reasons why… ↳ I love Marty Mikalski. (The Cabin in the Woods [2011])
like for memes.
hellfireleader:
“ look man, i’m not saying music is the most important thing in life- BUT, it is one of them. i mean, take a look at those mindless orcs over there- ” haphazardly he flung his hand towards the prude and perfect, letterman wearing losers gathered on the track field. “ people come, watch them play their wittle ball game, slam dunks- yawn, but have you noticed they can’t perform without a band there? you don’t see men throwing balls in hoops at concerts! music, like fucking real music is like blood, it’s NEEDED, without it life is just- ” he stopped, head swimming and trailing off as the swaying of the trees demanded all his attention.
maybe the shit they’d smoked was slightly stronger than usual. maybe it was kicking in a little more now. “- wait, what were we talking about? ” @nihiliski
marty nods enthusiastically -- he’s never one to let something as small as having no idea what an orc is get in the way of good conversation. and eddie’s good conversation, for the most part. especially when he goes on one of his rants; it’s soothing to listen to the yelling, especially when marty knows he’s not going to be asked to contribute. like listening to a mildly interesting class, knowing there won’t be a test anytime soon. “music, man,” he agrees rather cheerfully, taking another hit. “hey -- music man? isn’t that the name of something?” he’s thinking of a superhero wearing tighty-whities with little music notes on them, so it’s possible he’s a bit off.
marty takes another hit, “hey, don’t you start blaming the weed, my guy. ‘s not lady reefer’s fault if you can’t handle the good shit.”
no but it’s about how much marty cares about his friends??
𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐘, (a prompt list lifted from the novel/book with the same name, by ivy tholen, triggers for gore, violence, blood, injuries and general horror will be present. change pronouns as you see fit)
is this a joke? please tell me this is a joke.
i put the car in reverse and managed to drive away unseen.
i was never going to walk away from this.
please don’t make me do it.
i’ve already given you enough therapy material for the next thirty years.
stop it! you’re going to kill us both!
too bad your phones gone. your fans would die if they could see you now.
it’s like licking copper pipes covered in sand.
i can’t have you bleed to death.
nobody ever becomes a professional musician anyway.
you’ll probably become an accountant or something.
i’m not going to kill you. i’m just going to end your life.
too rough for you?
someone will see this and call the cops. they’re coming for you.
they ain’t gonna catch me.
you confessed to everything and provided enough evidence to convict you.
this is texas. you’re gonna fry.
i don’t have it in me to mutilate you.
you have to die, but you don’t have to slasher movie die.
i wasn’t going to put all of this online.
it’s better to go out with a bang, right?
i can help you. it doesn’t have to end this way.
what is done can be undone. please call me.
you put on a freaky costume and stalked her.
is this a joke? where are you? what did you do?
you’re a real sick piece of shit.
they think it’s fake! should i be offended or flattered?
i’m less and less scared the longer were up here.
oh my god, why are you acting like this is a party?
are you really in a position to mock me?
oh what are you going to do? kill me?
you decided. you decided before we even got here.
you just lied to yourself and said you’d spare me so you’d feel less like a villain.
well, i can’t exactly put all this online. or can i?
who would agree to do that for you?
it was hard to decide to kill you. you don’t deserve it. not like the rest of them.
of course you did. why wouldn’t you?
you butchered them. how are you not drenched in blood?
you put up a fight though, more than i expected.
who wouldn’t want to stare into these bette davis eyes for eternity?
does this mean your idea of heaven is staring at yourself in the mirror?
i don’t care anymore. just tell me what you’re going to do.
you must be in as much pain as i am, right?
how can a person be mopey and anxious at the same time?
so i’m pathetic. you’re pathetic. we’re kindred spirits.
are you finding jesus right here in this carnival or something?
i’m miserable. i thought it would make me feel better.
when i first decided to do this, i planned to kill you.
i didn’t want to mangle you or make you suffer.
why? we had a deal. why did you kill her?
give us a story and we’ll stick to it.
people never really give each other the benefit of the doubt.
everything is too much, right? you get it?
have you ever felt like the entire world is turning against you?
they’re so cute i could steal them and take them home.
i mean, i can’t say no to ice cream.
it would be better than murdering your friends in cold blood.
right, right. shouldn’t talk shit about the dead. my bad.
you’re such a little fighter, trying to find a weapon. i respect that.
you’d do anything for a friend, wouldn’t you?
we we’re never that close. you’d sell me out in a secound.
we’ll say we never saw the killer without his mask.
technically, you have to be crazy to kill someone in general.
i’ve seen this asshole in action. if he wanted you dead, you would be.
i will be right back and i will have cops with me.
one a scale of one to ten, how screwed are we?
can you enjoy a moment without researching it?
can you enjoy a moment without documenting it for your followers?
why didn’t you save me? i would’ve saved you.
if you’re not going to hurt me, can i leave?
i don’t even know who you are. you’re wearing a mask.
in fact, don’t hide at all. i’m not going to hurt you.
i already played hide and seek with [name], i’m bored with that game.
i can’t die in a room that smells like feet and old coffee.
can we please not refer to anyone in the past tense?
why are you telling me this right now?
you’re not crazy. i’m sorry if i made you feel that way.
i need you to know in case something happens.
we’ll be testifying at this asshole’s trail.
do whatever your little heart tells you.
i can’t touch a dead body.
he’ll find us. he’s had no trouble so far. it’s like he can teleport.
shouldn’t we hide as best as we can and wait?
there’s no happy ending for me. i threw it all away.
i’m pissed off and what you’re witnessing is me doing my best to feel better.
i’m not taking off the fucking mask. i might take yours off though.
it’s hard to hear anything inside this mask.
there’s never a good reason to murder people, you’re crazy.
if you run, i’ll catch you.
don’t run. i’m not moving. you don’t move neither.
i’m smashed up too. won’t be stopping me.
am i a horrible person if i say no?
it’s like you said. we have to save ourselves.
since when did you become a badass?
did we learn our lesson about dropping our weapons in front of murderers?
i’m light headed. i can’t do this much longer.
aren’t you dumbasses supposed to be hiding from me?
do you have a death wish? because i sure don’t.
you can tell me. are you the killer?
you told her to act like a kitty and fall asleep. it’s your fault.
how do you kill someone with a carousel?
we’re putting people in coffins?
when you see blood, you know blood, you feel blood.
if we don’t die, you wanna get married?
we’re going to die, aren’t we?
there’s a psycho in a cloak and mask chasing us around and you want to go into a haunted house?
you sound like the hero in an action movie. no one talks like that.
what if it’s more than one person?
do you have your phone with you?
this isn’t nearly as fun as i imagined it would be.
this night needs to end.
that fucking carousel music. it’s going to be stuck in my head for days.
fair enough. conversation dead and buried.
ugh. i don’t want to talk about this anymore.
if i tried to do that, i’d break my neck.
dude, this isn’t school. you don’t have to raise your hand.
people like to think they can survive a dangerous situation.
look, you don’t have to if you don’t want too.
never mind getting caught, how are we going to get home?
i want to go to college next year, not prison.
we need to get it done so we can explore the creepy abandoned carnival.
if people don’t want to ride with me, i’m not going to hold them hostage.
why are we playing along with this circus?
i’d sooner die than be so close to a body of water.
we’re breaking into a carnival with all our friends.
i’m a bad enough driver as it is.
i know for a fact she almost didn’t get an invite.
i read about it in an article on women’s self-defense.
i wouldn’t call me names if i were you.
you’re not a teeny bit concerned i might try to finish the job later?
i paid attention and learned.
are we all getting the picture now?
i can’t carry you. you’ll have to stay here.
i didn’t want to leave her there. i had no choice.
check yourself and make sure you’re okay.
yeah and the brown stuff is dried blood.
scared your name will be there?
your story was hard to believe.
i don’t want you to be freaked out about something when it probably means nothing.
maybe you’re putting together a pattern that isn’t really there.
i noticed something weird. you can’t call me crazy if i tell you.
what if we’re the only ones left?
it’s not about physical strength. we’re smarter than him.
the clock is running out for some people.
take off your mask.
if you’re going to kill me anyway, you might as well tell me who you are.
maybe i’ll take her and leave her in chunks. maybe i already have.
it’s not about not liking you. i don’t particularly dislike any of you.
i’m curious, have you wondered why i’m doing this? what’s my motivation?
if i were in your shoes, i’d have so many questions.
turn around and look at me. it’s hard to hear anything inside this mask.
this doesn’t feel like reality. is it? is this really happening?
don’t joke about [name] hurting people.
let’s not get too upset. emotions breed mistakes.
i don’t want him to go to jail. i want him dead.
if i see him again, i’m going to take your hammer and bash his brains in.
i wish i’d drilled a hole in his head when i had the chance.
it’s like there’s a million spiders running down my neck.
he killed my best friend. if i get my chance, i’m going to make him pay.
i picked it up when we ran.
he’s in here somewhere.
we have to keep running or we have to find a better hiding spot.
we also have to be prepared to fight.
i’m gonna hurl. it smells like lemon, cheese and metal in here.
see. carousel as murder weapon.
i’m serious. this is life or death.
all you have to do is curl up like a kitty and fall asleep.
then he found me. the gross tongue mask from before.
can you come here? i’m so high i’m hallucinating. or i hope i am.
move as fast as you can while we still have light.
did you put your arm around me to guide me into the building or so i could hold you?
my immortal soul just drifted up. just now. it bloomed.
mmm, grilled cheese. i should of gotten another one at dinner.
if i have to fight him, i’m playing for keeps.
it could be anyone. we can let the cops play detective.
i’m less concerned with who he is and more concerned with getting out alive.
you think it’s the same guy?
that has nothing to do with right now.
did you think i wouldn’t see you?
are we going to make it out alive?
we’re going the long way around to the house of horrors.
will you please get off the ground?
there was supposed to be a guard here tonight, wasn’t there?
i’d rather die than eat anything sweet.
i’m not so high that i can’t outrun this guy or even take him down.
you can’t go looking for them alone.
[name] is dead and if we don’t leave this carnival, so are we.
if you want to leave, go.
i’m going to try to find the others.
i have no idea what you’re talking about. we gotta go.
something something no man left behind.
we. can’t. leave. them.
we won’t be able to help the others if we’re dead.
there is someone in a black hooded cloak and demon mask.
it’s a scare actor costume from the carnival.
we have to get outta here.
well, i welcome him to come to me, i’ll kick his fucking ass!
why do i automatically assume people are dead?
what if everyone is dead?
we’re more likely to be arrested than murdered.
one hour and i’ll be done. sixty little minutes and it’s over.
god, i really don’t want to be here.
if i stop, it’s over, i’m dead.
you never know if you’ll get stuck without a bathroom when you need it.
i can’t wrap my head around one person wanting us dead. what could we have done to two?
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐃 𝐆𝐔𝐘𝐒 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 — a collection of one - liners taken from the 2022 animated film, the bad guys. slightly edited for clarity. change pronouns as necessary. spoiler free !
❛ would you please just drop it ? ❜ ❛ i mean , come on , everybody loves birthdays ! ❜ ❛ now i know the exact moment our friendship died . ❜ ❛ i am the villain in every story . ❜ ❛ these are the cards we’ve been dealt , so we might as well play ‘em . ❜ ❛ out of all the people in the world , i hate you the least . ❜ ❛ i believe that deep down , [ name ] is a kind and generous soul . ❜ ❛ the only one i self - loathe is you . ❜ ❛ i thought we weren’t supposed to make things personal . ❜ ❛ there is a flower of goodness inside all of us , just waiting to blossom . ❜ ❛ she and i will need to get up close and personal . ❜ ❛ they say that art reveals more about the viewer than the artist . ❜ ❛ even trash can be recycled into something beautiful . ❜ ❛ i will not hesitate to take you down with me . ❜ ❛ i’m alive , thanks to you . ❜ ❛ you’re such a good boy . ❜ ❛ i'm having a baby ! ❜ ❛ let’s make like a wolf and get the pack out of here . ❜ ❛ ah , wordplay ! … i don’t get it . ❜ ❛ being good just feels so good . ❜ ❛ when you’re good , you’re loved . ❜ ❛ not everyone gets a second chance . make the most of it , [ name ] . ❜ ❛ welcome to the first day of the rest of your best life . ❜ ❛ that cat is obviously defective . ❜ ❛ you’re volunteering ? you’ve never volunteered for anything ! ❜ ❛ i've been waiting my entire life for this moment . ❜ ❛ don’t you ever get tired of lying ? ❜ ❛ don’t do it for them . do it for you . ❜ ❛ this is a chance to write your own story . ❜ ❛ it’s just a shame that you have to carry all that baggage . ❜ ❛ i don’t waste time thinking about stuff that’s never gonna happen . ❜ ❛ it’s crime time , baby ! ❜ ❛ i was hoping you were gonna ask me to dance . ❜ ❛ figured it was time i got comfortable in my own fur . ❜ ❛ i think i like the new you . ❜ ❛ change is impossible . you should always judge a book by its cover . ❜ ❛ i'll kill you ! you hear me ? you’re dead ! ❜ ❛ our life was perfect until you decided to ruin it . ❜ ❛ nope ! i’m still the best . ❜ ❛ i’m not okay . i’m very , very un - okay . ❜ ❛ i’m still me . i’m just me on the right side . ❜ ❛ that’s not really your color . ❜ ❛ that was very cute , that thing we just did there . ❜ ❛ we stole it fair and square ! ❜ ❛ my friend was sad . i was just cheering him up . ❜ ❛ what ? i’m sentimental ! ❜ ❛ [ name ] , you feel like a girls’ trip ? ❜ ❛ i don’t have any friends ! ❜ ❛ i love you too , buddy . ❜ ❛ i’m really a big fan of redemption arcs . ❜ ❛ i got you to admit how much you care about me ! ❜
OUR PATIENCE IS WANING (is this entertaining?) THERE GOES MY MIND !
The Cabin in the Woods (2012, dir. Drew Goddard)