I'm writing this exactly one month after my last post.
I don't know how to keep going. I'm just stuck. It takes so much out of me just to keep me functioning and rational. But I'm still paralyzed.
It hurts to breathe. It's like a solid 8 whenever I feel the pain.
My body is shaking non-stop. Not because I feel cold.
I'm hungry all day, but I also don't have an appetite.
I want and need support, but I'd rather not beg for it. I'll accept what I receive. Though at the end of the day, there's a pain in my heart still. Is this what feeling lonely feels like?
I find it a little sad that my closest people think I'm just okay. That I don't feel tired of living or that maybe I'm struggling at all.
Do people think that I'm strong? That I got no worries at all? When all I want to ever do is lie down in bed and rot.












