Just a little mcyt-obsessed idiot. Sometimes I complain about my life. Mostly I just reblog stuff I find interesting or important.
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Claire Keane

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
RMH
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occasionally subtle
ojovivo

#extradirty

izzy's playlists!
Sade Olutola
Misplaced Lens Cap
trying on a metaphor
NASA
h

JBB: An Artblog!

Andulka
hello vonnie
Show & Tell

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@nikothecheese
Just a little mcyt-obsessed idiot. Sometimes I complain about my life. Mostly I just reblog stuff I find interesting or important.
User boxes made by the amazing @xxx-ang3l-w1th-a-sh0tgun-xxx
ZKOUŠKA SIRÉN!
Zkouška sirén, zkouška sirén, právě probíhá zkouška sirén!
The single most vital skills you need for exam season is emptying your mind right before the exam so you don't panic from stress.
The second is bullshiting so confidently it makes your teachers question everything they think they know.
cub and jevin pranked scar (with guardians and stuff) and tried to come up with some witty joke to leave for him but ended up putting this instead
might be the sweetest sounding vaguely threatening welcome message i've seen
Okay so Victorian erotica is literally the most heinous, morally bankrupt, horrific shit I've ever read - but I've read a fair bit, partly from historical interest but also because a while back I helped a friend with a university project she was doing about censorship and pornography in 19th century England.
Anyway I need to share with you all the most hilarious line that has ever been written, circa 1887:
I feel like this excerpt is significantly enhanced by knowing that the novel in question is a first-person narrative written from the perspective of an inexplicably sapient flea who lives on Bella's body, and that's why the third priest's penis is described in this way: from the narrator's perspective it literally blots out the sky.
me when im a flea
> be Mumbo Jumbo
> title stream “this is a test stream, please ignore”
> bumble about on Hermitcraft for a bit
> lose your pickaxe
> be baffled when you realize that nearly 8k people are watching
> be baffled when you realize that people can donate through youtube chat
> you’ve made £30 doing absolutely nothing
✨Professional Youtuber✨
while they share a similar base flavor, dick tastes more umami while pussy tastes more acidic, though recent menstruation conveys an overwhelming metallic flavor that some diners object to (though i am not one of them). recommended wine pairings are
(today i learnt that if you don’t know how a post should end, just post it unfinished anyway and someone else will come up with an ending)
We talk about this website's hate mail game, but the "yes, and..." game is pretty solid, too.
I don’t know why this was my first thought. I’m sorry.
The only adhd tips that work:
1. Never tell anyone what you're planning to do until you do it (you will get a premature dopamine hit and sense of accomplishment from telling them and lose motivation to actually do it)
2. Never sit down (never sit down)
one of my favorite tidbits about speedrunning that comes up every time the games done quick marathons come around is how Wind Waker speedruns are about five hours long because of the giant wall in Hyrule that actually forces the runner to play the game because they’ve been throwing shit at this wall for over a decade and still can’t figure out a way past it. the wall in hyrule is entirely unglitchable and the only way past it is to play the game properly. the speedrun would be like one hour if they could get past this wall but nope, it’s five hours. fuck the wall.
and the comedy of this situation is exponentially amplified the more you know about skips and glitches in speedruns in general
as examples of how broken WW is elsewhere, you can clip through walls and go out of bounds to skip entire dungeon sequences pretty much anywhere with a ledge, use the Wind Waker to enter a state where you ignore physics and swim at 5000 miles an hour, and even fly infinitely into the sky after dying like some kind of helium zombie. do you know how many games could be broken wide open by an infinite height trick? TTYD would shave off 3 or 4 hours.
but this fucking barrier around Hyrule Castle, against all odds, is just completely insurmountable with any of this. Ganondorf is literally the most successful and powerful villain in gaming history and this Super Extendo Fuck You Shield™ is a shining testament to it
This is the kind of information I want on my dash
Okay but do you have any idea just how big the Super Extendo Fuck You Shield™ actually is? Try approximately four times the height of the castle itself.
And not only that, but even if you get over the invisible wall, there’s another barrier that causes damage and knockback. So even if you managed to get over the invisible wall part of the Nintendo Containment System™, there’s still an additional, cylinder-shaped barrier that will do damage to you and knock you back out, even if you try to get in from the top or bottom. That castle has more security measures than Fort fucking Knox and it’s all to give a middle finger to speedrunners wanting to finish the game in an hour. It’s fucking wild.
https://youtu.be/7XBPrFYN1MU
As of July 2019, the barrier has been defeated in all versions of the game, and the current World Record is 1hr 04m50s. The current method is to give yourself seventy invisible grappling hooks, which corrupts so much of the game’s memory that there’s not enough left over to load the barrier (or a lot of other things, like enemies or cutscenes. It’s amazing). You can just walk right trough where it’s supposed to be.
Cant believe the only way to beat The wall™ is to stop it from ever existing in the first place
The line “seventy invisible grappling hooks” killed me
Incredible things happening in the speedrunning community.
A note from the Tumblr team
A few weeks ago, a small but higher-than-normal number of accounts were mistakenly suspended. The suspensions were quickly reversed, but our response wasn't good enough, and we want to say more.
We're sorry it took us this long to address this. Trust and safety issues are difficult to discuss publicly, and we can’t share details about specific individuals or how our systems work without exposing Tumblr to bad actors. But caution led us to say too little, too late.
We’ve heard from members of the trans community on Tumblr that they were disproportionately impacted, and that deserves a direct response. According to 3rd party researchers, Tumblr’s userbase has the highest proportion of LGBTQIA+ folks on social media, so it makes sense that when something goes wrong, those communities might feel that disproportionate impact.
One thing we want to emphasize is that we do not moderate people's identities. We moderate behavior. We know that identity shows up across a Tumblr profile in many ways, from followed topics to the flags people put in their bios, and more. However, these signals play no role in how our moderation systems make decisions. We monitor those systems for evidence of bias and take corrective action when we find it.
We understand that the communications sent to affected users, and our broader silence to the community, didn't meet the standard people expect from us. That feedback is fair, and we apologize. We've updated the messaging sent to people impacted by these incidents. We are also overhauling our process with a goal of responding to mistaken suspension appeals within 24 hours, and have instituted an ongoing internal review of how suspensions and appeals are handled.
Going forward, we're committed to finding a better balance: being more transparent with our community about issues that matter, even when we can't share everything.
Tumblr belongs to everyone. We take that seriously, and we intend to earn back your trust. We are not afraid to have tough discussions with you or make updates based on your feedback, though on occasion, it might take some time.
To the people whose accounts were affected, and to the members of our trans community who felt targeted: we are truly sorry.
Tumblr Staff
Tumblr’s CEO won’t even apologise for following a trans woman offsite, leaking sensitive information about her account & sexually harassing her on Twitter to hundreds of thousands of people. How the fuck are we supposed to believe these lies if they can’t even account for that? Not to mention all the different times Matt Mullenweg has personally said that TERFs are not breaking any rules by posting their vile transphobic hate speech. He has a personal vendetta against trans women, and we will not be gaslit about it. This trust can only be earned by actually doing something about the structural problem here rather than telling us we’re all delusional for noticing that trans women are targeted harsher & impacted wider by the tumblr moderation system.
dnes jsem objevila, že tahle knížka existuje a ano, je to od týpka, kterej vymyslel ferdu mravence
Češnekový linoryt 🐌🧄
milý: povedlo se mi vytopit koupelnu
já: dobrá práce, věřil jsem v tebe
milý: naložil jsem pračku a nevšim jsem si prádla, co se přivřelo ve dvířkách. takže sice byla zavřená, ale netěsnila :(
já: to je dobrý. alespoň teď víme, co se stane, když omylem přivřeš oděvní artikl ve dvířkách a nemusíme ohledně toho mít stresující intruzivní myšlenky!
milý: ...
já: ...
milý: lásko.... měl jsi stresující intruzivní myšlenky ohledně přivření prádla ve dvířkách pračky?
já:
My dva v jiném vesmíru: