Embrace life

I am warrior trained to warn pains

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“The problem was she wanted to be loved so badly she couldn’t tell it wasn’t love.”

— Leo Christopher

[heavensghost]

Bury a friend // Billie Eilish

[re-flashero]

billie eilish // bury a friend

[ninditanm]

I'm home

Yassalaaam entah sekian lama udah ga buka tumblr gara gara blokir kemarin and now I'm baaack. Sunggu menyiksa ketika hasrat menulis itu tinggi namun platform kesayangan malah gabisa diakses. Saya. Sungguh. Sedih. :(

Dan udah gitu aja.

Terkait kegalauan yang melanda akhir-akhir ini, yah, rasanya mau coba dipasrahin aja. Sesuatu yang dipaksakan gaakan berakhir baik bukan?

Semoga dia bahagia jauh di sana (eh!)

Semoga perjalanan masing-masing kita menyenangkan ya.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming.”

— mindsetofgreatness

[ninditanm]

About book

Days are the pages, it might have interesting stories. Some may cut shortly on a day, some might continue to another day.

Those pages are collected and divided into several books. Books for introduction, for friends, for family, for lover. But everyone has this one book, the master book, where it contains all the pages, uncensored. That book are only meant to be kept, not for anyone else.

As we meet new people, we give them, based on how worthy we perceive the reader. Those books may have come in series, but they need to pay the right amount of attention, right amount of details to unlock the next book.

And yes, as mentioned before, those books aren't meant for everyone. Some might left even only after reading a chapter. Some might not continue because they are somewhat clueless.

***

People said I'm an open book. But they don't know how much layer I have. I might have none, I might have tons of layer.

And you just read me rightaway without giving me your book.

But again, what's life without reading each other?

Aren't we just books waiting to be read?

Clock's ticking. The life of a chapter will be decided soon, I think.

Whatever for the best.

[ninditanm]

Whatever you say won't matter as long as I don't ask the question and you don't answer it.

[arabwife]

[ninditanm]

a cry for help

Never thought I would gone to a place I've avoided for years.

Memories rush through the stream, drowning me in pain, holding me in those past moments.

On how we walk in the rain. Or how you unveiled the surprises. On how you ride those red bike. And how we first met, and how we bid farewell.

Oh how can I even move on?

When I tightly hold onto those memories of you, and I cover it with other things I consider even more important.

Maybe I just want a friend to talk to. Like the way we talk that long. Or how we suggest some sweet song.

And those sea.

La mer.

And those sleepless night.

On how you make me upset and make it up.

Everything about you, i still hold it tight.

I just refuse to let it go. And I do whatever people consider as good.

I never left.

I wanna go to somewhere else.

With better companion.

I dont wanna miss you, but I do.

[zenpencils]

PROCRASTINATION! Words by Edgar Allan Poe, illustrated by Zen Pencils. BUY THE POSTER

[quotemadness]

Even if you know what’s coming, you’re never prepared for how it feels.

Natalie Standiford (via quotemadness)

[chibird]

I really think the world could use some light and positivity today. I have no words for all the tragedies occurring around the globe, so please have this positive bunny instead. 💛

Patreon | Webtoon | Instagram 

[ninditanm]

To the one that's still on my mind

This is my millionth attempt to post another thing about you. Back in the days, I might hate you more than I love you, but, ah, love is a complex thing right?

But anyway, we went separate ways. Hell, we never even walk the road together. Call me idiot or something, but everyone is a fool when it comes to love.

But I'm happy to find someone as kind as you. I'm grateful to know you. I loved you, and maybe still do, but I know boundaries. I'm happy to know I fell for someone that quite understand me, or at least makes me feel like being understood and appreciated.

Please be good. I pray for you and everyone that goes with you. I hope your life will be good.

[charliewam]

Î̡̩̜̗̦͖͎̺̬̪̬̣̱͊̐̌́̄̋̽͒̊̓͘'̙̩̲͐̇̃ͪ̓̿̉ͬ͋͜ͅm̶̛͔̣͉̙̼̖̬̭͖̩̤̪̹̭̞̙̌̌̈̂͋̃͑̋ͥ̊ͨ͛̈ͪ͗̚͢ ̶̸̨̫̣̘̲̳̟͖̲͇͎͚̫͇̪͓̿͋͊ͥ̏̓̄̓́ͭ̈ͥ̽͢͢c̸̦̖̰̣̙͎͙͓͙͕̼̘̱͔̬ͨ̋̀͗̏͗̍̊̐́͆̆́ͨ͒ͮ͆̚͞o̢̦̟̗̝̘̫̬̽̊̒̒͊̉ͥ̿͌ͬ̆̄ͪͤͬ̓̕͜͝m̋̓͐҉̨̖̹̺̺͉̱̣̱̺̹̣̯͍͔̭͉̺͕i̡̡̦͖̻̦̼͈̤͉̞̦̻̎͐ͮ̈́ͤ́̕ͅņ͍̜̜͔̼̜͉͎̱̹͍̺̘̖ͣͨ̐̅ͨ͐̿̽̊ͫ̆̅͑̐́͞͞g̴̶̶̳̟̞͖̺̏̔̇́̈ͫ̏ͭ̇ͥͩ͊͛̀̕

[lum1natrix]

Things went…wrong…

[ninditanm]

Forgive others, forgive yourself. Let go of all your pains and make it all up.

[ninditanm]

Hello mtbar!

It's been awhile... Nah, a year I guess since our last chat. But in all seriousness, I've been avoiding you for frikkin 2 years. Ever since we flew away from where we grew up together. Blame it all on the mellow songs, but I still miss the idea of you. I miss my illussion of you. I fully aware that you're never real. I share the idea of you to others, that is true, but you were never there. Physically, you're there, but never as someone I can't stop think of. Yes, indeed we have some discussion here and there, but all the emotions are all made up, I guess. I will never know. Is it too cruel to me? Am I hurting myself? I'm guilty of making the idea of "meet just when you're 18 and leave me just before you're 23". Those numbers should mean to you. I know you know. Silly that I miss falling asleep for three hours while watching you to sleep. There are some unanswered questions, only a sincere, deep "thank you" for i don't know what. And I'm lost now. ...guess my words are scattered here and there, but that's the point of rambling right? No, I don't wanna ruin each other's life. Life's been great. We got our own happiness. But some egotistical side of me think we still have some unfinished business, which in fact we don't. I just wanna know if some years we share have meanings to you. I just need a help, I guess. I need to know if I ever be something to someone. Funny that, I will never be able to look you in the eye anymore.