If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

our universe is a white hole

[wowsohigh]

[luvbey]

why are breakfast dates not  a more popular thing? like forget your 9pm fancy dinner reservation, lets go eat pancakes at 9am in our pjs

[ostracizedpoodle]

I will never wake up before noon for a man

[nonsensicallyvalid]

They do exist...she's usually putting her panties on telling me to hurry up and put mine on so we can get to chikfila early

[paprika]

[forfightersnotlovers]

Cody Garbrandt vs. Dominick Cruz UFC 207 (December 30, 2017)

“No Love” dodging punches from the Dominator with good head movement, which helped him win the UFC Bantamweight Championship.

[randomness-is-epic]

[theandromedastrain]

Why the fuck hasn’t anyone ever wonder this about Mr.Krabs & Pearl?

[factfiend]

Fun fact: According to Greek legend there was a famous prostitute who managed to avoid a death sentence by showing the judges her boobs and arguing that it would be a crime against the Gods to destroy something so beautiful. 

Before you ask, yes there are paintings of this. And yes, they’re amazing.

Read more.

[karlosmadera-deactivated2019022]

I love history.

[bipolarbulgogi]

Role models tho.

[blackwoolncrown]

[barcoque]

The gay one

[suzie-guru]

No, but this is one of my absolute favorite bits of history! 

The courtesan named was named Phryne and she was indeed a renowned beauty, and was indeed was put on trial for a capital crime. And yes, the sum of her defense consisted of her stripping in court (helped by her lover/defendant) and asking the jury (all males) if they were prepared to destroy this. 

But this is actually a very interesting case of Values Dissonance - the capital crime she was accused of was blasphemy. In Ancient Greek society, exceptional beauty was a sign of favor from the gods, and they took the idea that beauty indicated goodness with great seriousness. They even called their nobles Kaloi k'Agathoi, “the Beautiful and the Good.” 

So by showing off her great physical beauty, Phryne was being very clever indeed, her argument essentially being “How could I possibly commit blasphemy if the gods have given me this body?“ 

God, I adore history. 

[nationalshitpostingagency]

”If these tits are legit, you must acquit.”

[nonsensicallyvalid]

Reblogged just for that last comment ^^^ fucking genius

[ruinedchildhood]

[rainbow-puking]

[brokebackboys]

[someclassysas-blog]

[psych2go]

If you like these posts, check out @psych2go.

So some of you gave me feedback that the bg of the other ones were a bit dark. I made these ones lighter! Hope you like them!

[nursery-deactivated20160926]

aries: *basic human trait* taurus: *basic human trait* gemini: *basic human trait* cancer: *basic human trait* leo: *basic human trait* virgo: *basic human trait* libra: *basic human trait* scorpio: *basic human trait* sagittarius: *basic human trait* capricorn: *basic human trait* aquarius: *basic human trait* pisces: *basic human trait*

[mariofartwii]

me as hell

[pettyrevenge]

Back in college, my suitemates decided to prank a friend of ours who lived on the floor above us. During an entire Sunday afternoon, 8 of us blew up balloons which we stored in one of our bedrooms, and once our friend went to work on Monday evening (at the campus library), we filled her room from floor to ceiling with the balloons.

Ironically, as a relatively direct result of this prank, she and I began dating. She mentioned (playfully) that she would “get me back” for the balloon prank, but that I would probably never realize what she had done.

Her revenge was so subtle that I, indeed, had no idea that anything had been done to create the minor annoyance that plagued me for the remainder of our time at college. She sewed a library book security tag into the inside of my backpack, so every time I left the library, I set off the alarm and had my backpack searched.

[pettyrevenge]

At work I measure out two ounces of cashews in little bags. The bag itself weighs .03 ounces so I usually do 2.03 or 2.05 ounces to make up for it.

A lady asks me for a bag of warm cashews, I hand her one and ring her up. She holds them in her hand and tells me that that is not two ounces. “Ma'am I assure you they are two ounces, I measured them myself.” She does not believe me and asks for me to measure them in front of her. I put the bag on the scale and it measures 2.05 ounces, so I say “Oh! Looks like you have a little more” So I remove a single cashew from the bag and hand it back to her.

She was not happy and refused to buy the cashews but it was worth it.

[pettyrevenge]

Roommate was being a dick so I rubbed some grease from the leftover fried chicken on his xbox’s power button. Now, whenever he’s playing, his dog will walk by and sniff the button, turning it off mid-game.

[pettyrevenge]

I was on a four hour flight and had specifically chosen a window seat because I like to look outside the window. Once we were in the air the guy sitting behind me reached through the crack between the seat and closes my window. He gets out his laptop and begins shaking and kicking my seat. So I put my seat in the laid back position and reopened my window.

Enjoy the rest of your flight.

[doot]

a collection of gems from @pettyrevenge