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hi im keith im 14 and i have the ugliest first name i hate sluts and the company of men i think im hilarious and kawaii don't message me if you aint hollerin i don't want no fucking dumbass ho i blog to impress and express i if you like to know what i do for fun just touch my butt

[manlyhusbando-deactivated201807]

[noodle-poup]

beat the pussy so good she gets sent to the shadow realms

[whawtwhohow]

LMAO Sophie Turner is a fucking Queen!

[noodle-poup]

this is what happens when people don't get irony tho

[mommyandherbabyprince]

A little cute argument me and mommy had before bedtime! I love her so much😊

[movedtoscammer-deactivated20190]

if i talked like this to my mom i woulda got my ass beat

[movedtoscammer-deactivated20190]

hold up

[noodle-poup]

I'm cringing so hard my asshole has another asshole

[portcitywriter-deactivated20181]

[noodle-poup]

and I'm not sorry for calling you a cunt, you cunt

[jennyhoelzer-deactivated2016120]

[noodle-poup]

fucking garbage keyboard 

blue kaihl shit

[leptoceratops-deactivated201806]

oh my god

[becausebirds]

pew pew

[dr-falcon-fox-and-coyote]

HERE’S A FUN FACT - Ravens only make this sound if they really love you and think you’re their family. :D

[noodle-poup]

What @falcon-fox-and-coyote said is absolutely false. Ravens have a brain capacity fair to a parrot and are one of the most intelligent species of birds, if not one of the most intelligent species of animals. They’re able to mimic sounds and if a phrase is spoken enough, they’re able to repeat or “copy” said phrases. Also, a flock of crows is called a murder. Despite the name and popular culture, they rarely—if ever—attack people. lastly, their mental capacity allows these birds to solve simple problems such as opening a bottle just by watching and emulating by example.

[n0kiv]

Dead at the “lol you wild. Wyd though”

[ahzodiac]

Mom: Virgo, Capricorn, Libra, Cancer

Dad: Pisces, Taurus, Scorpio, Aquarius

Tyler: Sagittarius, Gemini, Aries, Leo

[noodle-poup]

@ahzodiac dude shut the fuck up

[shokaku]

Me getting in my house

[dancegavindance-deactivated2019]

can u imagine being this sad inside

[shokaku]

My friend I’m chillin a house built out of hard earned currency in the form of big PVC tiddie bress I couldn’t even care less if I’m sad as FUCK I’m rollin in cash under all this mess

[noodle-poup]

you can feel his parents crying on the inside 

[thebootydiaries]

me: 

saw weed 3 times

has 7 gf 

has 9 abs

listens to john lemon

saw a google image of marijuana sock once

has 3 phds on english

you: 

0 or maybe 1 or 2 gf

0 abs 

listens to marijuana and the diamonds

never met picasso irl

never heard of john lemon 

cryign blooger with 0 phds 

bye sweaty :)

[thebootydiaries]

[rugadh-ar-an-mbealach-seo]

I’m with jorober93538 on this. I’m in English Literature classes as my minor and the way you speak is not proper English. And the funny thing is that it’s my second language (Gaelic Irish being my first), and I still speak better than you. Plus if you have 3 PhDs then you will be intelligent in the medical field. If you’re talking about having a degree in English, then what you mean is a doctorate which is the highest degree you can get in anything. Plus, three doctorates in three different fields would make more sense than what you had said. Also, it is impossible to have nine abdominal muscles. Because abdominal muscles come in horizontal pairs of two, you would look improper shirtless. Also, that would mean you workout constantly (If it were possible to have a nine pack), which would mean that you would have no time to go to work (assuming you have a job if you have “3 PhDs in English”) and spend time with your girlfriend. So, overall, either one or all of your things are incorrect.

[thebootydiaries]

u come in to my HOME where i WORK OUT and CRY and tell me that my abs are impossible?? sweaty i raised them myself since i was an umbilical cord. im 11 so shut the UP binch!!!

[band--width]

One of the most cringe inducing wannabe troll posts I’ve ever seen on the Internet, let alone tumblr. I had no idea thebootdiaries was this pathetic - unsubscribing

[thebootydiaries]

1) this post has 83,659 notes 2) it’s called unfollowing binch :) go plague youtube with your presence 3) don’t let the door hit you on your way out

[thirteenredvampirebites]

You want to know why there’s so many notes? Because people are laughing at you! You have no grasp of the English language or biological knowledge of any kind!

[thebootydiaries]

i hate to break it to you but that’s definitely not why there are so many notes :) i made a joke :) and now it’s getting more notes because of ur superiority complex :) so now you’re the joke :) this has been a psa :) sweaty :)

[billie-roses-deactivated2016050]

yeah, no. we’re laughing AT you, not with you….and I’m guessing that’s why your icon is a trashcan. because you’re trash.

[thebootydiaries]

its called a selfie :) but dont beat urself up for not knowing that :) its not ur fault ur 40 :)

[noodle-poup]

my god it’s like watching a fucking kid fall down the stairs as they’re still trying their best to insult someone grow the fuck up kid you ain’t shit quit acting like a fucking prick jfc

[noodle-poup]

"I thought you said you weren't attracted to black or tan girls" Well I thought you weren't a cheating piece of shit but here we are

[noodle-poup]

But yo it's cool just don't complain when you ask to hang out next time with everyone else and you say "why wasn't I invited" because you know fuck you

[noodle-poup]

It's cool when friends make plans in front of you and repeatedly talk about it like you don't exist

[colonel-orneryarchives]

[revedas]

THIS WAS SUCH A GREAT JOKE

[charlesoberonn]

I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND

THIS EPISODE AIRES 43 YEARS AFTER THE ORIGINAL SCOOBY DOO WHERE ARE YOU

[noodle-poup]

^thanks captain dipshit obv i think everyone got that

[episodechooseyourstory]

Welcome to Episode: your home for interactive, visual stories, where as the player YOU choose what path your character takes!

[koolaidwaterjuices]

Oh no my mom’s home! Now jump out of the fucking window and leave me here suspiciously naked alone I’m bed because she obviously won’t think anything odd of that!

[noodle-poup]

I'm a bed

[heyfunniest]

Cannot be unseen.

[noodle-poup]

when people bash on 4chan and then there’s this

[danmangan]

i dropped my apple in the toilet

[danmangan]

[handslikebutts-deactivated20141]

did you decide oh im going to the bathroom better bring an apple with me

[danmangan]

basically yes

[joshramzay-deactivated20140130]

why is there a cat 

[danmangan]

he was helping

[noodle-poup]

this entire post makes no sense im so pissed off

[hoodniggashit]

Visit Original Link

[pushingpositivity]

Flowers | Nujabes

[qqqqqqqqqwe-deactivated20170301]

i ain’t ever heard this version, it has an intro…where did yall find this

[noodle-poup]

The beginning is a sample of Dinah Washington's "What A Difference A Day Makes" yall need some real music in yo life god bless nujabes for knowing music tho