the words between us - hwang hyunjin
in which we see the five times hyunjin almost said ‘i love you’ and the one time he finally said it.
1. the time y/n fell asleep on his shoulder.
the movie was halfway through but hyunjin had stopped paying attention quite a while ago. y/n, his girlfriend of a few months, was sitting beside him on the couch in her living room, her legs tucked under the knitted blanket.
the glow from the tv was casting a soft hue of blue and gold across her features - an old, comfort film she’d chosen for their weekly movie night, which both of them had seen a dozen times before but it was one of her favourites… and hyunjin loved making her smile so who was he to deny her watching it another time?
at first, she was sitting up straight beside hyunjin with her legs folded infront of her. she was smiling with her eyes fixed on the screen, laughing along to the dialogue she practically knew by heart. but somewhere between scenes and low giggles, her chin came to rest on her fist in her lap as her eyes grew slightly heavy.
gently, without even realising, her body had naturally leaned sideways, her head coming to rest against hyunjin’s shoulder.
of course it wasn’t the first time she’d been this close to him, but it might as well have been with the way he froze in his spot and his heart started beating just a bit harder against his rib cage. this time felt different. he would usually brush her hair away with delicate fingers, would make sure her head was laying just right to prevent her neck aching when she woke up.
but now, all his thoughts were numbing. because he could feel the warmth of her breath through his thin t-shirt. he could smell the faint yet familiar smell of her shampoo, of her perfume and it was driving him crazy.
he swallowed and didn’t dare move, didn’t dare risk waking her up or ruining the moment.
y/n’s hand slipped from her lap and brushed his arm, very delicately, barely there. and yet, as if on instinct, hyunjin covered her hand with his own. he brought her hand to his lap, caging her warm fingers with his own palms and beginning to trace delicate, gentle shapes into her skin. it was an unconscious action, one he’d done many times before and didn’t even think about, but now..
now, he could feel every dip of her hand, every curve of her fingers, every bit of her warm skin beneath his own and he suddenly wanted to press his lips to her hand, as if to press his love into her.
y/n shifted slightly and a small, relaxed sigh escaped her lips - the kind that melted every muscle in his body.
the movie played on but hyunjin couldn’t hear it anymore. all he could focus on was the light patter of the rain against the tall windows in her apartment, the steady rhythm of y/n’s breathing, and the unbearable softness of the moment.
he craned his head just enough to look at his girl.
her hair had slightly fallen onto her face, lashes resting peacefully against her cheeks, and pink lips parted slightly in her sleep. she looked so peaceful - like the world had finally given her a break.
something inside his chest ached.
the words came so easily to his head, but they felt too heavy on his tongue.
he wanted to whisper it, to let it linger in the still air between them both, but he didn’t. instead, he smiled calmly. his cool fingertips ran over her knuckles ever so softly, and he pressed his lips to the crown of her head in a feather-light kiss.
“sleep well.” he whispered, barely audible, “my beautiful girl.”
y/n stirred under his lips, as if she could sense his tender words against her hair, but she only leaned closer into him and hyunjin swore he almost lost it. his heart nearly gave out.
he tilted his head back against the couch and let his eyes travel across the plain white ceiling, over the dimmed lights casting their faded brightness down on the two of them. he couldn’t help it when he exhaled a quiet laugh - one of those small, disbelieving ones that come when something feels too perfect to be real.
by the time the credits rolled, y/n was still asleep against hyunjin with her hand still between his.
and hyunjin sat there, completely motionless, still smiling like a lovesick fool, watching over her as though the whole world had stopped - and honestly, for him, it had.
2. the time y/n wore his hoodie.
hyunjin wasn’t prepared for the sight that would greet him when he tiredly walked into the kitchen of y/n’s apartment that morning.
there she was – standing by the counter, half asleep, hair a gloriously tamed mess and wearing his hoodie.
it wasn’t just any hoodie either, it was one of his favourite hoodies - plain black with slightly frayed edges, the one he always swore ‘looked better oversized’ but secretly kept it for days off or dance practices where he didn’t want to worry about what to wear.
it hung off of her frame like it was made for someone twice her size as the sleeves seemed to bunch at her wrists. she was frowning into her mug of coffee, trying to stir it with a spoon that clicked against the edges with her gentle motions.
hyunjin, grinning, leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms over his chest. and y/n, sensing his presence, looked up to find him practically staring holes into her with his tongue poking the inside of his cheek.
“what?” she asked with her raspy morning voice.
“nothing.” he replied, “you just look..”
“i look…” y/n carried on, holding her mug close to her chest as she looked at her boyfriend expectantly.
and hyunjin pushed off of the doorframe with a reluctant smile. he took small steps over to her by the counter and once he reached her, he couldn’t help his hand from circling around the back of her waist as if on instinct.
“you look warm.” he finished, knowing what he actually wanted to say was: you look like home.
when y/n gave him a cute smile in return, he carried on with a playful tone, “first the blanket, then the snacks, and now my hoodies… should i be worried you’re taking over my life?”
“you’d miss me if i didn’t.” she joked back with just as much teasing glinting in her eyes as she stared up at the boy.
hyunjin also gleamed down at her, “you’re probably right.”
y/n brought her mug to her lips and took a careful, slow sip of her hot drink all while hyunjin still couldn’t stop staring down at her. his fingers gently ran across her back over the familiar material of the hoodie and y/n could feel it - his tentative fingers - and she hid her smile behind the rim of her mug.
“stop staring.” she lowly mumbled when she caught his still glare from the corner of her eye, “i know it looks better on me.”
“excuse me?” hyunjin gasped rather dramatically and placed his free hand on his chest, “that hoodie was custom made for my artistic proportions.”
“yeah sure. by artistic, you mean dramatic?” she snapped back and hyunjin could only sigh in defeat, lips parted in faux shock.
y/n was still smiling when hyunjin took the smallest of steps forward and both of his arms came round to rest on the front of her belly, caging her fully in his arms. he rested his head on her shoulder and y/n only smiled lovingly when he pulled her closer against his chest.
“keep it, it suits you better.” his voice was a feather-light breath against her ear, enough to make her cheeks redden instantly.
“mhm.” he brushed a small strand of her hair behind her ear ever so delicately, “besides, now it smells like you. i’ll just steal it back the next time i miss you.”
his girlfriend only groaned in response and rolled her eyes playfully, pretending to be disgusted by his words, “you’re such a sap.”
hyunjin grinned from ear to ear as he watched y/n turn back to her coffee sitting on the counter infront of them whilst mumbling something about how ridiculous he was. but she was too distracted to feel how hard hyunjins heart was beating in his chest, how his throat was constricting because he was holding back the three words he so badly wanted to shout out loud.
but he held back, because even though this moment was another perfectly beautiful moment between the two of them, he was waiting for the right time.
3. the time y/n took care of him after practice.
the door clicked open a little past 11pm.
y/n looked up from where she was perched on the couch aimlessly scrolling through her phone. her slightly sleepy eyes blinked up at the sound of shuffling, hyunjin putting his bag down with a gentle thud, and taking his shoes off by the door. he stepped further into the room - hoodie half-zipped, hair messy from hours of rehearsals and shoulders slumped as if the weight of the choreography still sat on them.
he looked exhausted. beautiful, but exhausted.
“hey.” y/n’s low voice called out to him softly, clicking her phone shut, “you’re home later than usual.”
he smiled, though it barely reached his eyes, “yeah, practice ran over time. again.”
“of course it did.” the girl sighed and got up from the couch, “you didn’t eat, did you?”
at her words, hyunjin seemed to hesitate as if he didn’t want her worrying for him anymore but when she raised an expectant brow in his direction, he sighed reluctantly.
she shook her head but nevertheless, a smile sat prettily on her lips, “you’re impossible.”
“you sound like my manager.”
“your manager doesn’t love you enough to make you soup at almost midnight.”
those words earned her a real laugh - soft and tired but it was real, “touché.”
hyunjin had made his way over to the couch as y/n walked over to the kitchen in silence. he dropped onto the couch with a deep, tired groan, almost like an old man after the slightest bit of movement. every part of him ached. his muscles were tight, his back screamed for some relief and his head felt like it was being pounded by a thousand hammers at once.
and yet, when he saw y/n working silently in the kitchen with her hair tied up and one of his hoodies over her pyjamas, the tension seemed to ease in him just a little.
it was only about five minutes later when she returned to the couch with a steaming bowl of soup and that firm don’t-argue-with-me look that had him smiling uncontrollably.
“you didn’t have to, baby-”
“oh shut up.” she snapped back with a hint of playfulness in her sharp tone. her careful fingers placed the bowl and a spoon down on the coffee table for him before she took her own seat back beside him.
“i made it a few hours ago when i came back from work. i only warmed it up, baby. now, eat.”
hyunjin leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, his mouth suddenly salivating just at the sight of the bowl infront of him. he hadn’t eaten anything in hours, his stomach was practically growling at him and he could’ve devoured about five of these bowls right now.
he obeyed her instantly, because honestly, he didn’t have it in him to fight her anyway. it was a simple seaweed soup, and yet the familiar warmth, the smell, the fact she made it, made it feel even more like home.
y/n returned to scrolling on her phone as one of her hands absentmindedly traced her fingertips up and down his spine. it was an unconscious action, one none of them paid any mind to. hyunjin quietly ate his food for a while as he occasionally glanced up at her, not wanting to talk but rather basking in the familiar comfort only she could bring him in a quiet room.
the room was dim, save for the two lamps cascading their soft yellow light into the room, and the faint city lights seeping in through the curtains. everything felt soft. familiar. safe.
as soon as he was finished with his food, he sat back with a satisfied sigh, “i might not ever move again.”
“perfect.” y/n shut her phone off, and instantly got up from her seat once again, “then i can do this.”
before hyunjin could even ask what ‘this’ meant, y/n had already returned from the kitchen with a small jar of muscle balm. hyunjins lips parted slightly at the sight of the familiar bottle yet he shut his mouth when y/n signalled for him to tilt his body slightly to the left so that she could kneel behind him.
“shhh.” her voice was firm but affectionate, full of care and attention, “you’ll thank me later.”
she sat back down behind him and her fingers were instantly reaching for the hem of his hoodie, pulling it up and over his shoulders, with a little help from hyunjin. his back was exposed to her, the familiar, strong muscles on display, ones she’d seen a few times before, but she had no sexual intentions in any way shape or form. she just wanted to make her boyfriend feel better.
her hands were warm. they were so careful and so soft and the balm was incredibly cool against his skin. she started off slow, rubbing her palms in gentle circular motions over his tight muscles. she moved up and down his back, her fingers even reaching up and over his shoulders, up the back of his neck, down his sides.
and hyunjin swore he could’ve fallen asleep right there and then. her hands felt like absolute heaven against his tired skin and he could instantly feel himself relaxing under her fingers, his muscles loosening and a sigh of content leaving his lips ever so often.
when she kneaded her palms against a particular knot in his back, a groan left his lips - involuntarily, embarrassingly - and he immediately flushed a dark red.
y/n laughed softly, “don’t apologise. that means i’m doing a good job.”
“more than good.” he mumbled in reply and his eyes fluttered shut.
every knot she worked on seemed to loosen something inside his chest too - not just the pain and tiredness, but all the unspoken words sitting there.
“i swear, one day your body’s going to revolt and quit before you do.” y/n told him after a heartbeat of comforting silence.
hyunjin smiled at her teasing words, eyes still closed, “maybe. but then you’d have to carry me everywhere.”
“i’d do it.” she giggled, “you’re light enough.”
hyunjin laughed, a genuine, breathy laugh that only made the smile on y/n’s lips stretch even wider, “you’d really do that?”
“of course! you take care of me all the time, hyunjin. let me take care of you sometimes, too.”
something in his chest twisted.
he turned his head slightly as he caught her wrist before she could move her palm up to his shoulder even more. his eyes held nothing but content and love for the girl in front of him and his voice was a lot softer this time - “you’re too good to me.”
she smiled, brushing his hair away from his face slightly, “someone has to be.”
he looked at her then - really looked - and for a moment, the ache in his muscles eased completely and his thoughts just numbed. the world went quiet. there was only her, bathed in soft lamplight, her balmy hands still resting against the back of his shoulders, her eyes warm and tired and still so incredibly kind.
he wanted to tell her right then - i love you. i love you so fucking much, you don’t know what you do to me.
the words even burned on his tongue.
but instead, he just smiled; that shy, lopsided smile that seemed to always give him away and he gently squeezed her hand in his own.
“thank you.” he spoke, “for this, and everything else.”
she smiled back and he swore his heart physically skipped a beat, “any time, baby. you deserve it.”
4. the time she took care of him when he was sick.
hyunjin: baby, i think im actually dying 😭
hyunjin: everything hurts. even my hair
y/n laughed at that, shaking her head as she read the message. that was definitely him - overly dramatic even with a possible fever. still, something in her chest tightened when she imagined him laying limbless in bed, miserable and alone in his dorm.
so, of course, thirty minutes later, she was at his door with her hair pulled back and a huge tote bag on her shoulder filled to the brim with different medications, homemade soup that he loved so much only because she made it perfect, and her favourite box of tissues (because the ones hyunjin always bought seemed to feel like sandpaper).
when he opened the door, y/n almost laughed out loud.
he looked like he’d been attacked by some blanket monster - his hoodie was pulled up and over his messy hair, nose unbelievably red, eyes watery and a tissue clutched between one hand as if it had wronged him personally.
“y/n?” his hoarse voice croaked out when his eyes cleared up and caught sight of his pretty girlfriend infront of him, looking as beautiful as ever, meanwhile he was looking like he’d been in a fight with his bed. he hadn’t bothered looking at the entrance camera before opening the door, which was why he was so shocked.
“you didn’t have to come.”
her brows lifted, “you texted me that you were dying.”
“i was being dramatic.” he sniffled.
“i know. when are you not being dramatic?” she giggled and walked inside anyway. she began taking off her shoes as he only stood by and watched her, “but i came anyway because i don’t trust you taking care of yourself like this.”
he closed the door and shuffled after her as she easily made her way to the kitchen. she placed her tote bag onto the counter and began unloading everything she’d bought and hyunjin could only watch her, amazed but internally relieved at the sight of everything she’d bought just for him.
“you’re like a mom.” his raspy voice teased her from where he stood by, leaning against the counter.
she glanced at him briefly, “a mom who cares about you enough to save you from dehydration, yes.”
he tried to grin but it seemed to melt into a soft smile instead, “you’re too good to me.”
“don’t sweet talk me.” she replied with a firm voice and signalled to the chair by the counter, “sit. drink this.”
she handed him a glass of water like some general giving orders and yet, he still obeyed without complaint. his tired eyes never left her as she moved around his kitchen naturally, stirring soup, preparing food for him in two separate bowls, fussing with the stove as if she’d done it a thousand times before.
when she finally set a bowl down infront of him, hyunjin looked up at her from where he had slouched against his fist, his eyes practically dropped to a quick sleep.
he glanced at her with soft and glassy eyes, “you’re seriously an angel.”
“eat.” she bit back her grin.
he ate slowly and y/n ate with him, stealing the quick bites he would hold up to her on his spoon. he was slow with his eating, probably due to how physically tired he was, and occasionally stopped to cough or sneeze or wipe his nose with one of the million tissues in his pocket. y/n couldn’t help laughing at the way he pouted every time his nose got stuffy again, and he even caught her giggling once.
his eyes narrowed at her, “are you laughing at my suffering?”
“a little.” she admitted, “you’re kind of cute when you’re all pathetic.”
he instantly pointed his spoon at her dramatically, “that’s cruel, y/n. insanely cruel and heartless.”
after he’d finished, y/n made him take some medicine - this seemed like a whole battle in itself. mostly because he insisted he didn’t need it, or that he was strong enough to get better on his own.
but y/n only gave him one look, one raise of her brows and he immediately downed the spoonful of the bitter medicine. he put the spoon down, muttering something about her being “scary when nurturing.”
finally, she had coaxed him onto the couch with some fresh blankets and pillows, to which he sank into with a heaved sigh of relief, practically half asleep already. y/n tucked the blanket tighter around him and delicately brushed his hair back from his face too.
hyunjin’s eyes fluttered open at her warm touch, just long enough to meet her gaze too, “you’re staying, right?”
he nodded and she took a seat beside him, “obviously i want you to. everything feels better when you’re here.”
that one sentence seemed to almost break her heart entirely.
silence engulfed them instantly. hyunjin had situated her under the blankets with him, and practically stuck his own body to hers like a koala to a tree, his fingers digging into her sides and pulling her impossibly closer to him as he rested his pounding head into the crook of her neck. the room was warm, the air filled with strong scent of soup and eucalyptus from the balm she’d rubbed into his temples.
hyunjin shifted slightly onto his side so that he could see her face better, just inches away from hers.
y/n chuckled under her breath, “you’re delirious and half asleep.”
“maybe.” he mumbled back, eyes half shut, “but you’re still pretty.”
y/n flushed a tinge of pink and her thumb reached up to brush against his cool cheekbone, a touch barely there but it made both of their hearts flip in their chests.
he hummed in response but didn’t act on her words yet. instead, he continued staring at her, the way he always did when he thought she wasn’t noticing except now, she stared back with just as much love and affection swimming in her eyes. his chest felt tight but not from the cold or his sickness, but rather from the thought that if he were braver, he would’ve told her exactly what he was thinking in that moment.
how every little thing she did - from the way she scolded him to the way she worried about him - it made his heart ache in the best way possible. it made his throat constrict and his head pound and he practically had heart-eyes as he stared at her right now.
i love you, he wanted to say. even with this stupid fever and stuffy nose, i love you so much it hurts.
instead, his hand reached up from under the pressure of the blankets and he let his fingers find hers. y/n smiled at the contact and instantly reached forward to press a delicate, loving kiss against his burning cheek.
her thumb traced gentle circles into his skin as he squeezed her hand once. she pulled back from the kiss and smiled against his skin, “better?”
5. the time she saw one of his paintings.
she wasn’t supposed to find it.
hyunjin didn’t mean for anyone to see it - especially not her.
it was late on a sunday afternoon with the sunlight spilling through the open windows in hyunjin’s dorm. he was in the kitchen washing his paintbrushes, humming faintly to himself, when he heard y/n call his name.
something in her tone made him turn instantly, “yeah?“
when she didn’t reply, his brows furrowed and he was about to continue cleaning his brushes when he remembered he’d seen her walking into his art room as he was going to the kitchen. he thought nothing of it, since she was always in there gushing over his work, but then he remembered that one painting.
the one that held the painting he’d never planned to show her, yet.
it stood on an easel in the corner of the room, usually covered with a sheet whenever she came over, but he forgot to cover it after he was done working on it a few hours ago.
hyunjin froze instantly, water still flowing into the sink.
“shit-” he dropped the brush into the sink, turned the tap off and hurriedly reached for a towel to wipe his wet hands with whilst he walked over to the art room.
and of course, it was exactly what he had suspected. y/n was standing by the easel, the cover half-draped or basically falling onto the floor, and she stood there.
completely silent, neutral, no expression.
and that made his heart rate spike.
“y/n, it’s not finished-”
she didn’t look away from it, “you painted this?”
he hesitated just a bit, rubbing the side of his arm nervously, “yeah. it’s kind of… nothing. just practice.”
thats what made y/n turn to him. there was a soft look in her eyes, one that always made his heart flip, but there was also a glint of disbelief, as she couldn’t believe he was calling this masterpiece just ‘nothing’.
his eyes followed her gaze back to the painting.
she was sitting on the floor of his dorm, by the couch, with a book in her hand and a gentle, comforted smile on her lips. she was in one of his woolly sweaters, one that drowned her whole frame, and behind her was a huge window - the same window in his living room that fully ran from the ceiling to the floor and in it, he had painted the most beautiful sunset she had ever seen.
each brush stroke carried something of her - the way her shoulders curved as she leaned down to read her book, the way he had painted the gleam of the light onto her skin.
y/n stepped closer to inspect it as her heart began beating even louder in her ears.
“you even painted my finger after i lost my nail.” she huffed a humoured breath as she eyed her fingers wrapped around the book in the painting - and she couldn’t believe just how much detail he had painted, how much attention he paid to her in real life.
hyunjin’s cheeks flushed just a bit, “yeah.. i did.”
“you’ve been working on this for a while?”
when she looked over at him, hyunjin snapped his head away to avoid eye contact and looked down to a jar of brushes that suddenly seemed like they needed some attention.
he bit on the inside of his cheek, debating dropping the topic, but the way her eyes tore into his soul so expectantly, he couldn’t help but sigh a little, “since you fell asleep in the living room that afternoon while reading your book. you just looked so peaceful and i didn’t wanna wake you, or forget that moment so i painted this the next day.”
her chest ached just a bit more at his words, at the softness and vulnerability in his tone, “hyunjin…”
he glanced up and their eyes met.
there was something so open in his gaze - a kind of quiet devotion that had only intensified the more he fell for her, the more his love for her grew. his fingers twitched at his sides, like he wanted to reach out and pull her closer, to kiss his love into her.
“you’re… amazing.” y/n breathed out, “this is so beautiful, oh my God.”
he laughed a little, “you think?”
as if reading his thoughts, y/n walked over to him in only a few small steps. her hand instantly reached for his, her eyes searing themselves up into his with a quiet intensity, “why didn’t you show me this before?”
“because i didn’t paint it for anyone to see.”
“then who did you paint it for?”
he hesitated again as a hint of blush slowly coated his cheeks once more, “me.”
y/n lifted her brow, “you?”
he nodded with a shy smile and y/n swore he’d never looked as beautiful as he did in this moment. so shy, so quiet.
“when i miss you, i paint and it just kinda- helps.”
y/n blinked up at him, “baby… you paint me when you miss me?”
“yeah.” his laugh was soft, full of self-consciousness, “that sounds pathetic, doesn’t it?”
“not even a little.” she shook her head and smiled so endearingly at him, he thought his heart would constrict right there and then, “that’s actually the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.”
at her words, hyunjin squeezed her hand in his. he bit the inside of his cheek as his eyes roamed her face - the sunlight hitting her hair, making it glow just a bit, the soft curve of her lips, the mole on her cheek that he loved to kiss so much.
he wanted to say, i painted you because i love you.
because every version of you - laughing, tired, quiet, angry, even the one in my dreams - feels like something i want to keep forever.
instead, he smiled so brightly, and ducked his head to brush his lips against her temple.
when he pulled back, his usual playful expression took over him once more, “don’t tell anyone i’m this cheesy, okay? i have a reputation to uphold.”
y/n laughed at that as she wrapped an arm around his waist to press her head into his chest lovingly, “don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me, my romantic boyfriend.”
+1. the time he finally said it.
the rain had started softly - just a quiet drizzle that blurred the edges of the city and painted the streets in sheets of silver. y/n and hyunjin hadn’t planned to be caught in it.
both of them had gone out for a walk after dinner, sharing an umbrella and easy conversation that seemed to flow between them naturally, like always. but when the wind had picked up and the clouds seemed to darken even more, the umbrella had become completely useless.
y/n was the first to scoff with her lips parted in blatant disbelief, and hyunjin could only laugh at their upturned umbrella before he had grabbed her hand and made a run down the street. there was barely anything nearby for them to hide under, save for the bunch of trees by the park at the end of the street and hyunjin made a beeline for it.
by the time they had reached the trees, the umbrella was abandoned on a nearby bench. hyunjin stopped in the middle of the path to take a deep heave of breath, hands resting down on his knees. his long sleeve shirt had completely clung to his skin now and rain kept dripping down from his hair.
he looked like something out of a dream - cheeks flushed, shirt clinging to his skin and eyes still bright and happy even under the grey dullness of the sky.
but only when he looked at her.
y/n laughed through her heavy breaths too as she stopped a few feet away.
“you’re actually insane!” water clung to her lashes, to her hair and dripped down her skin as if she’d just walked out of the shower with her clothes on, “we could’ve just gone home.”
hyunjin grinned, that soft, boyish grin that made y/n want to just slot her lips over his.
she chuckled and wrapped her arms around herself, stepping closer to him, “you’re ridiculous.”
“probably.” he replied with that same teasing tone he always used with her, “but you’re still here with me.”
the way he said it - so quiet and fond - made y/n’s laughter slowly die down. the rain was falling a lot harder now, a steady rhythm against the pavement and hitting itself against every inch of their bodies, but none of them seemed to mind. for a moment, everything disappeared and hyunjin could feel his heart beating just a bit louder and harder in his chest.
y/n didn’t move. she stayed rooted in her spot, the hint of a smile still on her lips as she watched hyunjin approach her.
“y/n.” he said softly. it was low compared to the harsh thrashing of the rain but y/n could hear him loud enough, “can i tell you something?”
“you’re already soaked, hyunjin. i think you can tell me anything.” she smiled, shivering slightly.
raindrops scattered themselves over his hair and down the contours of his face as he shook his head playfully, “you always joke when i’m being serious.”
“that’s because you’re scary when you’re serious.” she playfully remarked in return but her voice came out quieter than it meant to.
he took another tentative step closer, close enough that y/n could feel the heat of his breath fanning itself against her skin despite the rain falling in between them. if he moved any closer, she might’ve even been able to hear his pounding heart.
“i’m serious now.” he said as his sharp eyes searched hers - soft, uncertain and full of something that made y/n’s heart stumbled.
he took a shaky breath, “i’ve been trying to say this for weeks and every time i almost do, i stop because i don’t wanna mess it up. but… i want to say it properly now.”
the words were raw and trembling but full of certainty. it wasn’t loud, it didn’t need to be. the rain could’ve swallowed the words whole but somehow, y/n heard them perfectly. her heart rate spiked and she blinked up at him as if she didn’t hear him properly.
“i love you.” he repeated, a lot firmer this time. hyunjin’s hands found hers and his cold fingers enveloped her shaky ones, the pads of his fingers squeezing her skin lovingly.
“i love you so fucking much it actually hurts and trust me, i didn’t plan on saying it like this but-” he chuckled, “it feels right.”
y/n was alarmingly quiet for a heartbeat longer than normal. the loud patter of the rain was the only sound between them, mixed with the loud silence of everything that had been built up over weeks, months even, and hyunjin could only hold his breath in anticipation of her reaction.
she smiled that quiet, trembling smile that always made him forget how to breathe, and hyunjin’s heart seemed to have found another reason to keep beating, to keep living.
to just make her smile like that for the rest of their lives.
“say it again.” she whispered lowly.
he exhaled a laugh of disbelief, rainwater still sliding down his face, “you heard me.”
“i know.” she said, much softer this time, “but i want to hear you say it again.”
hyunjin dropped his forehead to hers, his cold skin almost attaching to her own as their hair stuck together, breaths mingling with each other’s beneath the spray.
“i love you.” he whispered, ever so delicately, “i love you, i love you, i love-”
it wasn’t neat, but how could it be with the rain pouring all over them and their hearts pounding in their ears and their hands slippery as they latched onto eachother. but it was real. the kind of kiss that felt like it’d refreshed them in some way, like it had been waiting forever.
the kind of kiss that tasted of rain and relief and every unspoken word that both of them had been too afraid to admit to each other after only a few months of dating. y/n’s hands reached up to caress the back of hyunjin’s neck and when her cold fingertips reached into his hair to scratch against his scalp, he shivered.
it was an unnatural shock that ran through him and he could only tighten his hands on her waist as he tilted his head to deepen the kiss.
when y/n pulled away and hovered her lips just above his own, they both were already giggling and gasping for air.
“you’re drenched.” she said as she brushed some water from his cheek.
“so are you.” he removed a hand from her waist to tuck a soaked strand of hair behind her ear, “but you’re still the prettiest thing i’ve ever seen, muse.”
y/n rolled her eyes, cheeks burning despite her reaction, “you’re hopelessly impossible.”
“i’m hopelessly in love with you.”
and y/n couldn’t even argue with his correction because she loved hearing that word fall from his lips so effortlessly, as if loving her was as easy as breathing for him.
“good.” she laughed again, a bright and warm sound that he adored so much. she wrapped her arms around his neck tighter, pulling him impossibly closer, “because i love you too.”
he stilled for a second and his eyes only shook as they searched hers. and then - very quietly, “say it again.”
she leaned in and her lips brushed the shell of his ear, “i love you, hwang hyunjin.”
and hyunjin could only close his eyes in response as he dropped his head to her shoulder. the shy yet proud smile that overtook his lips was uncontrollable and his hands only bunched her hoodie between his fists as he breathed gently against her neck.
“finally.” he murmured and a breathy, quiet laugh escaped him, “i’ve been dying to hear that.”
both of them stayed there, under the bunch of trees, tangled up in the rain - two soaked, breathless idiots in love, laughing like the whole world belonged to them.
and maybe, for that moment, it did.
germansingergirl
blakekathryn
2087
turnnoffyourmind
areudirty
prguitarman
theartofmadeline
