I need a drink. @occasionally-gives-a-damn - Tumblr Blog

I always heard you. Shadows in the streets, prickles on the back of my neck. Your voice. Pushing me, picking me up when all the colours were black.

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what do you mean Just Standing There Ominously doesn’t count as socializing

thesmartassdetective

by John Nugroho

obsessionsarenotforheroes

occasionally-gives-a-damn:

“I doubt fanning the flames of this conflict is appropriate right now, Jessica.”

The remark earned a loathful grunt in response. She couldn’t quite string the right words together to signify how little she agreed with Kilgrave’s sentiment, but part of Jessica knew he could feel it. Even with enough tranquilizers in her system to send the average person into a very long sleep, Jessica’s reluctance to be in any proximity to the purple man was palpable.

“Hush Jessica, you are going to be fine. Do not worry.”

A hand caught Jessica’s waist, coaxing to the forefront of her mind an uncomfortable sea of memories of occasions in which he had touched her in such a way. Reflexively, she felt herself stiffen beneath the contact, bracing for the invisible threat whilst being all-too-aware of her inability to combat it in her current state.

“Prick.” The word dripped with venom between them, angry in more ways than one. Angry that he felt he could dare to touch her. Angry that a man set on killing her was putting up the façade of caring what happened to her. Angry at herself for not being strong enough to break that hand that settled so confidently onto her waist.

Fighting the movement of the room, Jessica planted her feet to the ground in an effort to steady herself. A deep frown set itself about her features. There was too much bullshit going on to be dealing with Kilgrave on top of it all. Before she had so much as a chance to collect her thoughts, he spoke again, furthering the growing hints of anger simmering beneath her surface.

“Jessica. Don’t be stupid. You can barely walk on your own.”

And with that, the hold that had been keeping her upright began to shift, only just managing to earn some groggy compliance from Jessica’s feet. As soon as the drugs wore off it would be a different story. They were wearing off, just slower than she would like. But when they did, he’d be very stupid to stay so close. He’d be dead in a heartbeat once she turned on him out of her semi-lucid state.

Was it perhaps best to pretend a bit? Lower his guard? Maybe. If it was at all possible to endure whatever he had in store. He wasn’t stupid, after all. The same trick wasn’t going to work twice. And then came the added complication of what his role was in all of this, and whether he was needed to put an end to it. The sea of complications was enough to give her a headache without the lousy feeling of being hungover and strung out on medication.

As she stumbled out of the building, Jessica cast a bleary gaze across where they were. She didn’t recognise this part of the city. Not well enough to navigate. Absently, she began to fumble at her pocket in the vain chance her abductor had left her phone. Nada.

“Shit…” She muttered beneath her breath. The photos and evidence she’d gathered there was likely lost for good.

After a few moments, Jessica’s eyes caught up with Kilgrave’s noting the faces of the homeless and strung-out watching them. No-doubt it was a bizarre scene to witness. Part of Jessica wanted to shout out, to cause some scene. But it was hardly worth it with Kilgrave’s ability able to smooth the edges down so quickly. None of these people would be of any help. Involving them only put them at further risk.

After approaching a livelier set of streets, Kilgrave turned to her. Jessica wouldn’t admit the relief she felt at having the opportunity to pause and get her bearings. The street names were familiar sounding again, only about a fifteen-minute walk from Hell’s Kitchen.

“Are you injured in any capacity? Or are you just brutally knocked out with whatever drugs they pumped into your system?”

“What do you care?” The embittered response came from where Jessica stood, shoulders squared with tension after taking pains to shirk out of the contact and steady herself against a building instead.

“I’d take the creepy warehouse kidnapping over you any day. Or are you going to tell me that was you too? Get your story straight, asshole.”

It was honestly like trying to unknot a string of barbed wire. No matter how careful you were, no matter how much tact you used to unravel it, you would always end up cutting yourself one way or the other. The spikes would scrape against your skin, nick it, maybe tear it open in some unfortunate parts. Jessica would always carry her hatred for him on her sleeve. God, she was so wrapped up in this, it could get tiresome.

Though Kilgrave now at least accepted it that she hated him. Perhabs always had hated him. He regretted meeting her. As fun and entertaining as controlling her had been, Jessica Jones was not worth the constant hazzle. Still Kilgrave could not stand the thought of anybody but him eliminating Jessica Jones. He hated the thought of anybody else having anything to do with her. She was the albino stag, he had decided to pursue and he would be damned, if he was not going to be the one to mount her head on the wall.

However right now, neither of them could focus on their mutual hatred. Right now they had bigger problems to worry about. Hence why when Jessica eyed him with absolute bile and called him a prick, Kilgrave gave a short “Point taken”. Other then that, his grip on her merely tightened, whenever Jessica was about to slip from her lucidity.

Kilgrave kept his gaze watchful on Jessica. Being this close to her was not recommendable. Especially now that he could no longer control her. Even though they were securely hidden underneath his purple scarf, her finger prints still littered his skin like burns. Jesus Christ, ths woman had a grip like iron! And she could get pretty volatile. Kilgrave rather wanted to make sure that he was out of striking range, should it come to it. Though he obviously would favour it, if he could convince her that trying to kill him was not a recommendable action. After all she did not seem to be any step closer to her end goal. Her end goal, which they seemed to share. Whether she liked admitting that or not.

“I care, because I am worried about you”, Kilgrave said and leaned a touch closer, though he was careful not to intrude onto her personal bubble, “I know you, Jessica. You are as tough as wire. Seeing you like this - as delicious as it is - it’s not normal. You are not someone, who gets knocked out easily.” It honestly infuriated Kilgrave that anybody, who was not him, had reduced Jessica to such a state. It did not suit her at all!

Kilgrave looked around to make sure nobody else was listening. He then said: “I already told you: This whole situation is not my doing. I had nothing to do with it! In fact, I had planned on leaving New York for the time being.” He tapped against his neck. “After all you did quite a lot of damage there. I was not keen on running into you again. However when I noticed somebody was targetting supers, I grew worried. I just… I do not like the idea of seeing you in peril. So I decided to make sure you are okay. Turns out I was right to look for you.”

Kilgrave urged: “Listen, Jessica, you can call me a liar on everything else if that pleases you, but in this instance you have to believe me. I do not know who is roaming the streets, but it is clear that you cannot handle him on your own. If I am honest, I fear I cannot do much either. I tried controling this potential enemy, but he was nothing but lights and shadow. I cannot control something that’s not really there. Face it: We are at an impass.”

occasionally-gives-a-damn

The persistent touch seared an unending reminder into Jessica’s mind. Even after all this time- even after besting him after every disadvantage, Kilgrave always won in one way. There was no end to the way his voice turned her blood to ice. There was no overcoming the fear that built in the pit of her stomach at the sight of him. Even the pliant, helpful gestures he offered felt positively weighted, as though loaded with hidden intention.

“I care, because I am worried about you” He inched closer before seeming to remember himself. Perhaps their last run-in truly had etched a hint of caution into his brain. Pity Kilgrave’s fear seemed less deeply rooted.

“Spare me the pity act.” Jessica drawled, feeling the words slur at the end of her tongue as she glowered towards what could only be interpreted as a threat after all their years of conflict.

“I know you, Jessica. You are as tough as wire. Seeing you like this - as delicious as it is - it’s not normal. You are not someone, who gets knocked out easily.”

Jessica’s lip curled at the backhanded attempt of a complement. Everything was too convenient. Kilgrave had to be involved somehow. As opportunistic as he was, it was hard to believe he hadn’t orchestrated such a situation to suit whatever sadistic whim had settled on his mind. That, paired with the unsettling attempt to play nice had Jessica’s heart picking up a notch as she fought the sluggish weight of drugs in her system.

“I already told you: This whole situation is not my doing. I had nothing to do with it! In fact, I had planned on leaving New York for the time being. After all you did quite a lot of damage there. I was not keen on running into you again. However when I noticed somebody was targeting supers, I grew worried. I just… I do not like the idea of seeing you in peril. So I decided to make sure you are okay. Turns out I was right to look for you.”

It was too much.

The smothering insistence of concern, the closeness- everything. With a scoff of unbridled disgust, Jessica aimed a slow shove in an effort to remove the unwanted contact.

I can’t deal with this right now.

Without pause, Jessica picked a direction and began a swift walk, still battling dizziness and bumping into passers-by as she took her route into the bustling streets.

She didn’t need to look back to know he was still there.

“Listen, Jessica, you can call me a liar or everything else if that pleases you, but in this instance you have to believe me. I do not know who is roaming the streets, but it is clear that you cannot handle him on your own. If I am honest, I fear I cannot do much either. I tried controlling this potential enemy, but he was nothing but lights and shadow. I cannot control something that’s not really there. Face it: We are at an impass.”

Her steps grew quicker and clumsier as his voice followed. As the crowd thickened, Jessica took a quick dive into a back alley, feeling a bleak sense of dread as the presence followed. With heavy movements that lacked the usual grace and control of sobriety, Jessica lurched towards the Purple Man, snatching at the collar of his shirt. Pale knuckles pressed the reminder of the last time she’d touched his neck as she mustered up every inch of bluster she could manage.

“So you’ve found something else you can’t toy with. I’m sure it really bothers you.” Venom lingered in her words. They were close now, but it was on her terms. The unwavering grip was all the warning needed.

“You’re not exactly selling yourself, Kevin.” Jessica hissed, tightening up her grip just enough to get the message across.

“Playing the hero doesn’t suit you.”

#obsessionsarenotforheroes #well shit #consider this a tentative return

musesxinnumerable

occasionally-gives-a-damn:

“Thank you… for coming for me.”

Jessica watched as Clint gingerly made an effort to steady himself. The weight behind his every movement spoke of what had happened before he’d been found. Something grave settled into Jessica’s expression as she categorised the severity of it all. He was such a mess it felt hard to know where to start. As little as the concept of babysitting appealed, the conclusion that Clint was in no state to manage entirely alone in the immediate aftermath was beginning to dawn on Jessica.

“I’ve got it from here.”

The hoarse attempt at saving face was enough to pull Jessica back to the present. In her haze, Clint had only managed a measly step ahead. Jessica was swift to close the distance again, this time shifting to block his path.

“Like hell you do.”

I see through your bullshit, Barton.

Jessica was no stranger to being in the uncomfortable position that Clint found himself in; home invasion via means of unwanted help. The number that she’d extend the courtesy to was remarkably small. Hopefully he knew that. He’d helped her in ways that felt impossible to repay. It was difficult not to feel at least a little indebted to him. An unwavering stare fought to hold Clint’s attention from the uncomfortable proximity she had created.

“I’ll go when you’re strong enough to push me out the damn door. You look like you couldn’t make it to the bathroom if you needed a piss.”

It was a firm reminder. Part of Clint had to know that being alone and vulnerable at his home with Parker out on the prowl was asking for trouble. He’d been lucky to get out alive this time. If they got hold of him again, the outcome would likely be even worse.

They didn’t need to make it anything more than a practical arrangement. Jessica didn’t want it to be anything more than that. She had her own shit to be doing. Besides, Barton’s company had a way of grating after a while. Jessica had managed to extend her tolerance threshold to about twenty minutes, but it had taken work. Somehow, the concept of spending time with this near-mute version of Clint didn’t feel like much of an upgrade.

“Like hell you do.”

“I’ll go when you’re strong enough to push me out the damn door. You look like you couldn’t make it to the bathroom if you needed a piss.”

Eyes searched her face for a moment while he thought up any way that might get her out of there faster but holding himself together was taking far too much effort. In truth he didn’t want her to bear witness to just how vulnerable he felt. His gaze averted just as swiftly so that she hopefully wouldn’t see the tear that threatened to give him away.

Clint put one foot in front of the other and kept moving toward his bedroom. When he spoke again, his answer was not open for any kind of negotiation. “Fine. Do what you want but you’re not coming in here with me.” As cold as his tone was, he understood what it was she was doing. Had their situation been reversed, he would have done the same.

He managed to get through the threshold without any more assistance and pushed the door closed. There was a point on the way to the bathroom that he considered laying on the floor and calling it good but he could practically sense her on the other side of the door, just waiting to intervene and take over.

Clint took a great deal of time to get out of his boots and stepped into the shower fully clothed, standing under the stream of ice cold water as it struck the cuts and bruises he had accumulated. The swirl of gross water circling the drain made his head spin and forced him to take a place on the floor in the corner where he eventually succumbed to the fatigue.

occasionally-gives-a-damn

A flat stare met Clint as he searched Jessica’s face for any sign of wavering.

He looked like shit. He looked broken.

Jessica was no stranger to having unwelcome witnesses to her own lowest moments. It wasn’t exactly great to be on the other end of the spectrum either. The longer she held up Clint’s gaze, the more she began to absently wonder if those were tears battling to be swallowed back on his end.

Gross.

Absolutely not the level of helpful interaction she wanted any part in.

As if sensing it (and sharing the sentiment), Clint promptly averted his gaze and began a pitiful path for his room.

“Fine. Do what you want but you’re not coming in here with me.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Jessica remarked dryly, making no attempt to so much as follow to the door. He was moving slowly, but Jessica was happy enough to let him drag his feet in the name of his own pride. She was there as a last resort. If nothing else Jessica had never appreciated Trish’s micro-managing when she’d been at rock bottom.

After a while the sound of the shower running sounded. Clint had done well enough to get that far, Jessica mused to herself as she began to work her way around the apartment, quietly cataloguing what was present. After a while she resigned herself to becoming comfortable on the couch, flicking with a degree of disinterest through the channels on the TV. News was always bad. Trish was the last thing she could stomach. The channels flitted through news to talk shows, to documentaries to terrible soaps. The longer Jessica sat, the more she began to realise that committing to such a charitable act was going to be painful as all hell. In hindsight, bringing a laptop would have been a great idea if she’d have had a heads-up for what she was getting into. At least then, working would have been a more realistic option.

After some time, Jessica’s thoughts trickled back to the sound of the shower running. How long had he been in there? A quick glance at her phone planted a seed of concern. With a tired sigh, Jessica hauled herself over to the door, pausing to listen.

No movement. Only the undisturbed sound of running water.

Goddamn it.

“Hey jackass, if you make me come in there I am never going to forgive you.”

#musesxinnumerable #I'm dipping my toes back into returning on here #because sad alcoholic vibes run through my veins #Jessica: hah trust me going into the bathroom with you is never going to happen #1 hour later #Jessica: Clint so help me god if you make me go back on what I just said we're gonna have problems

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DAY 03- AKA J.J.📸 The first season with @TheRealKrystenRitter & David Tenant was such a great watch! Both of their performances were amazing! Loved the purple visuals used throughout the show!💜