NEVER / DIES

[ofblacktyde]

esme stark   |   cf-starks

The Maester was her friend, he taught her many things and was a sort of confidant. Her mind was empty and her body was numb, she did not know what to think or what to do. But she refused her scattered emotions to show on her exterior. The feast was now broken and there was no chance to revive it, her brother’s coronation day ruined and the Stark named stained once again. Or would it be the Targaryen name that was stained. She didn’t know. “Forgive us for being poor hosts, this tragedy is unfortunate but tranquility will return to the North soon enough.” She displayed a small smile. 

        to think that only a few hours ago stefán had been worried that nothing interesting would occur during their stay at winterfell. now there had been a fire, a murder, and suspicions were running high. hopefully a fight would soon break out so he could really have a good time. he possessed no sympathy for the maester’s death. he’d been an old man, probably nearing his time anyways. so he missed a few years where he’d have done nothing but sit on his ass and feed his ravens. a loss it was not, and stefán had no intention of pretending it was to him, not even to a stark.          ❝  i hope tranquility won’t find us soon. these past few hours have been the most entertaining of our stay thus far. it would be a pity to return to boredom so quickly. ❞          he chuckled and flashed a smile at the princess.

[resourcesinblue]

DEATHLESS.

the following prompts were taken from the novel deathless by catherynne m. valente, an american novelist & poet. the novel was loosely based on the tale of koschei the deathless, incorporating other elements of russian mythology, & setting it against the backdrop of the russian revolution. feel free to change the pronouns / prompts as you see fit, but be warned – below the cut, it’s quite long !

❛ the service of your body is not yours to give as you please. ❜

❛ you probably won’t survive. ❜

❛ go. run. don’t look behind you. ❜

❛ i have come for the girl in the window. ❜

❛ i will never be without information. ❜

❛ i will see him with his skin off before i fall in love. ❜

❛ if the world is divided into seeing & not seeing, i will always choose to see. ❜

❛ secrets are jealous things, permitting no fraternization. ❜

❛ no, it’s not like that, when magic comes. ❜

❛ magic does that. it wastes you away. once it grips you by the ear, the world gets quieter & quieter until you can hardly hear it at all. ❜

❛ the sight of it bruised my heart so that i cannot think about anything else. ❜

❛ i’ll be so quiet, i’ll never talk again. ❜

❛ keep me & obey me, for i am your husband, & i can destroy you. ❜

❛ i shall be clever, & i shall not let him go. ❜

❛ it is a new world, & we do not wish to be left behind. ❜

Keep reading

[ofblacktyde]

myriam   |   myriamed

        she wonders if he has thoughtabout her in the years that now distance them. does he imagine her ? does he envision the nights she wept over him  - -  waiting fruitlessly for a return that would never come. when he boarded that ship back to westeros , were the words he uttered to her spoken falsely ? she is not one to be taken for a fool , and yet she had clung so willingly to  his every word. his arms felt more like a home than anything she had ever known. she had allowed him into her heart , and he stole it away. never once had he attempted to RETURN it. 

        myriam had never desired a life as a westerosi lady. in truth , she had no need for it. to be a lord’s wife meant less freedom than she was now allowed. her fortune was hers & hers alone , and yet - -  for him , she had entertained the idea. he , who had made no attempts to stifle or contain her. whose wildness was a match entirely for her own. the plans they had made. does he ever LOOK BACK ? 

       ❝  i am sorry to hear that .    ❞  though she wishes his father no ill , stefán’s sudden sense of duty is almost laughable. is his word conditional ? are there degrees to which he can keep a promise ? hands come to rest defensively against her waistline , eyes obviously avoiding his. 

        she can tell by the sudden shift in an obscenely polite tone , that something has angered him. time has done little to fade her understanding of him. in turn , her temper ignites. what right has he to be angry ? eyes now lift to bear into his. 

           ❝  AND I DIDN’T THINK YOU THOUGHT OF ME AT ALL .   ❞ the words escape in a hiss . ❝  - -  how i spend my time is little concern of yours , my lord. you made sure of that long ago.   ❞ 

        his homecoming should have been a joyous occasion, but all stefán had felt was restlessness. he’d long to return to the sea, return to braavos, but obstacles had appeared one after the other and it hadn’t mattered how hard he fought; leaving wasn’t an option. looking back, he feels foolish for fighting so hard. she had probably left braavos the moment he was out of sight. had what they shared meant nothing to her? perhaps she hadn’t cared. perhaps she still doesn’t. 

          but stefán... no matter how his eye had wandered before myriam and after her disappearance, his heart remains as faithful as the sea. there has only been one woman he has let into his heart. only myriam. he wishes now that he could will his heart to let her go for she has clearly turned her back on him - on them. however, even beneath the anger currently filling his veins, his heart still beats for her. a sea may rage and wreck havoc on an island, but once the storm clears its waves will gently crash upon the shores once more, silently apologizing for its temper. there is no end in sight for his storm but his love refuses to wane.

          in some twisted sense, it makes his temper flare even more. she has no right to hold this control over him. this is why stefán was never interested in love before. love is a weakness. it blinds a person, makes them incapable of thought, especially when the heart is broken. with her, he’d let the idea fade. a foolish mistake.

          ❝  i see. ❞           his jaw clenches. how dare she.          ❝  well i’m sure the crown makes sure your pockets are full and your nights aren’t lonely. ❞          venom fills his words. any sign of politeness has faded and in his storm of rage, he hopes his words hurt. it goes against his heart; all he has ever wanted has been to protect her and make her happy, but his heart is drowned out by storm.

          ❝  must be quite the life. ❞          he wonders if she remembers the life they had spoken of. then again, those must have been lies too. easy for her to forget, impossible for stefán.

[ofblacktyde]

kristján greyjoy   |   kristjvn

A FAMILIAR VOICE REACHED HIS EARS .  the young kraken was already grinning as he turned his head to acknowledge lord blacktyde— his most trusted friend for most of his life .          ❛  stefán !  how right you are .  if the ale runs out we may very well riot ,  hell ,  that might be a bit of fun .  perhaps we should drink more ,  hm ?  ❜          he chuckled ,  clapping the fellow ironborn on the shoulder .          ❛  tell me what you’ve been up to ,  my friend .  i feel like i’ve barely laid eyes on you since we made it through winterfell’s gates .  not leaving me to fend for myself among the mainlanders are you ?  ❜

        ❝  you’ll find no objections from me! while the drink has been good the night has been far too calm. ❞          there was never a time that stefán wasn’t looking for or willing to fight. it didn’t matter that they weren’t carrying their weapons; he’d fight with his fists and teeth if it came to it.          ❝  saying you can’t survive without me, kris? i’m flattered. ❞          he nudged kris with his shoulder, roughly but affectionately.          ❝  i’ve simply been having as much fun as one can have on land. drinking mainly, breaking a few hearts. ❞          what else was there to do at a celebration like this?          ❝  and you? ❞

[ofblacktyde]

myriam   |   myriamed

          her heart had belonged to herself & the sea with one exception. how an ironborn lord had wriggled his way into her bed , her life , and then her very being would always be one of the greatest mysteries in myriam’s life. there was no rationale to explain why the woman who made a vow never to attach had found the strings of her heart inexorably connected to another. the fact that those ties had never been entirely severed threatened the very essence of who she presented herself to be  - - unfeeling , distant , and solely driven by a self-ordained purpose. she had been SOFT , once. she had been willing to abandon ( the starling ) for the bow of a ship, and it had all been for him. 

                                        she loved him. he left her. 

         how FOOLISH it was to think that the golden, sun-drenched light of braavos would shine upon them for longer than the fleeting moments they were given. to think that the willingness to abandon had been mutual. she watches him flounder for words , and uses it as an opportunity to steel herself against anything he might say. she wonders what she MIGHT say in return, and tries to squelch the screaming voice inside her that wishes to tell him how terribly she has missed him -  to inquire as to whether her memory washes over him in waves in the same way his TORMENTS her. the tide never changes in that regard . he is relentless in his existence.

          a brow raises slightly at his inquiry, and she forces a veneer of politeness. it would not serve her well to be seen by others as anything other than charming , no matter how much she wishes to crumble.    ❝  i suppose it would be easy to ask you the same question ,   ❞ she begins, a tactic meant to divert until she can compose her own thoughts. ❝ i never pictured you at lordly events like this.   ❞  but perhaps it was because he had never asserted himself as a lord. not to her, at least. in that regard, they had always felt like equals. trembling hands seek to still themselves by locking her fingers together. 

                               ❝  i am here at the behest of the southern crown.                          i believe you are familiar with what it is to be duty bound. ❞  

        the ironborn are forged at sea; the churning tides and unforgiving waves give them no choice but to drown any softness that may exist within them. the soft do not thrive at sea. stefán doubts he was ever born with softness in his blood. had he been then the sickness would have taken his life when he was first born. but he had survived. he has survived countless other events meant to kill him too - the deathless; a moniker he wears with pride. each scar he has suffered in life has hardened his skin. however, standing here now stefán realizes he has not crafted his armor strong enough.

          for her, he had allowed softness to flow through his veins, like how the sea, when it did not storm, would stretch up the shore and lap at one’s ankles, embracing instead of drowning. curse him. curse him for thinking the bliss they lived in would last. the horizon always carries a storm. he should have known one would have found them; he shouldn’t have let love sneak its way into his heart. but it had. perhaps if he was a better man he would have stayed forever, but the sea calls to him, even now, and the moment krisján had decided it time to leave stefán had followed, but not without a promise. a meaningless promise so it seems.

          ❝  i’m representing house blacktyde. my father is too ill to travel. ❞          he keeps his tone formal. he doesn’t know how to speak to her now. her words remind him that it should be his brother in his place, he wonders if she knows or if she even cares, but even if dalton were alive, stefán wouldn’t have left kris to suffer through this affair on his own.

          his expression hardens, jaw clenching.          ❝  duty? ❞          an anger sparks in him, fueled by his hurt and sorrow, that rivals the pain. good. hurt is foreign but he knows anger well enough to control it. he can armor himself in it. the shock has faded; he finds solid ground again. all duty is is promises. where had this commitment to duty when he’d promised to return for her? she’d turned her back on that promise with no hesitation.          ❝  didn’t think you’d swear yourself to some bloody crown. ❞          he wants to ask if they are treating her well. if she’s happy. but he cannot.

[ofblacktyde]

quellon greyjoy   |   thelordreaper

      “Stefán!” Quellon’s voice boomed out into the room, jovial in tone as he took the offered glass. Around them the music swelled and he saw others take up drink as he did. “Would we had proper to drink for such a celebration, land would seem akin to the sea.” But the land held firm, no swaying or lurching to be had. He took a large sum of the ale into his mouth, gulping it down before speaking again. “Where have my brothers run off to and why are you not party to their….activities?” He knew the Blacktyde boy to be closer to Kristjan and where one had been in the midst of misdeed, the other was certainly beside if not far behind. 

        the mainlanders may know how to throw a celebration with music, food, and ale, but they didn’t know how to celebrate. the mood was far too tame for stefán’s liking and most of the nobles in attendance were content with merely standing around and talking. what a dull affair.          ❝  if only that were the case. i might be able to tolerate the land more. ❞          a hopeless thought. the sea would call him back as it did every time. he wasn’t meant to reside on land where everything was calm and predictable; how anyone could stand it was beyond him.          ❝  i figured kris could survive a little while without me. don’t worry, we’ll be off causing trouble together soon enough. ❞          he smiled brightly, chuckled, and took a large drink of ale.

[renwd]

[ofblacktyde]

have you ever been in love?

        love, people had always said, was meant to be soft and warm, making it an idea stefán had turned his nose up at as a young man. he was an ironborn, born and raised to be harsh like the waves that crashed upon the rocks; there was no room for softness in his life nor had he desired to be soft. the idea of falling in love had had no place in his life; until it did. love had crept up on him. before he fully realized it, love had worked its way into his heart, twisting around the organ until it was impossible to untangle it. stefán had found that he didn’t want to either.

          despite his original abhorrence for anything soft, he’d found love warm and appealing. the love that had blossomed in him hadn’t erased his sharp edges, and he’d embraced it eagerly. oh, how he had loved her. 

          but people had lied. they’d only presented love in its purest form; they’d never mentioned how it cut and wounded the heart. how the absence of it made one feel like they were living in an endless drought. his heart was parched from its absence. it made it difficult to talk about love and by extension her.           ❝  yes... ❞          the word came out as barely a whisper. he didn’t dare say more otherwise he would divulge the truth: that he still half in love. incapable of escape. he’d placed his heart within her hands and had never retrieved it. perhaps it would remain in her care for the rest of his days, whether she realized it or not.

i promise this is the last one @myriamed

[ofblacktyde]

what is something that saddens you?

        the shores of braavos were fresh in his memory even those it had been years since he’d been there. how ironic that the place were he had been happiest is also the place where his saddest memory resides. had all gone according to plan it wouldn’t, but no one could plan for their eldest brother dying far too soon. still, it was his fault. he should have fought harder to gain the time to return, but the currents had been too strong and he’d found himself a ship chained to the dock with no way to free himself swiftly.

          beneath the guilt, their was bitterness as well. she should have known that he was true to his word; he would have found a way to return even it took years. no matter how strong the waters dividing them he would have braved them again and again until either they reunited or strength failed him completely. and he had. he had set foot on the shores of braavos once more and searched every street, every house, to find her. only to discover that she was already gone. the knowledge had struck him like a knife to the heart. like many wounds that refused to heal, infection soon set in. had she had so little faith in him that she had left the moment he failed to return? had she waited for him at all? he felt guilty for those thoughts as well. he had been one who had failed her first.           ❝  that i didn’t return to braavos sooner. that she didn’t wait for me. ❞

i’m sorry @myriamed

[ofblacktyde]

What is most precious to you?

          ❝  my ship. shortly after i returned from essos my father gifted me with a ship of my own when i was given command of the blacktyde fleet. there is no possession i cherish more than her. ❞

[ofblacktyde]

do you regret going to essos?

        ❝  i have no use for regrets. and even if i did, what would be there to regret? for six years kris and i sailed wherever we wished and did whatever we pleased. essos for exhilarating and exciting. i would never undo my decision to follow kris there. ❞

         he’d never regretted following krisján anywhere, and he doubted he ever would. ever since they were little where one had gone the other had followed. there hadn’t even been a doubt in his mind when kris had informed him of his intent. if essos was his destination then it was stefán’s too. it wasn’t like anything was holding him back; the future had been bright and open. why not chase the horizon and see what essos held in store?

           and if he had never gone then he never would have met her. no matter how much pain the memories now carried, like salt water in open wounds if he thought on them for too long, he did not regret them. perhaps he should. if he didn’t still think of them fondly then maybe his heart would be able to release its grip on her memory. she would become a old scar that would fade with time. he could not, however, do that. but there was one regret he could not shake no matter how hard he tried. it had nothing to do with going to essos, quite the opposite in fact. 

          his mistake had not been going to essos; it had been leaving alone. 

@kristjvn and @myriamed

[ofblacktyde]

do you wish to be married?

        ❝  no.  ❞        he knew it was an unavoidable fate that awaited him as it awaited every future ruling lord. every house needed an heir. that didn’t mean stefán looked forward to the prospect. he had spent most of his life planning to never marry, one of the many blessing of once being the younger son. there was no pressure for him to being anything or wed anyone unless he himself desired it. it hadn’t mattered how many women he’d charmed during his life; they were good company in the moment but the thought of marrying them had never crossed his mind. except…

          there had been a moment, a memory he’d let himself bury deep within his mind, of her. she’d been smiling, the reason he couldn’t recall, but he could hear the thought that had echoed in his mind as clearly as the day he’d first thought it. he had wanted to see her smile every day for however long he may live. the thought had knocked the air out of his lungs when it struck him; a quick attack before a rapid retreat. but the thought continued to resurface. the thought of a future with her had occurred so often that eventually he could no longer look ahead without wanting to see her there as well.

          his throat felt tight. memories of her were strong enough to drown him if he dwelled on them for too long.          ❝  there was someone once… many years ago. but… ❞          the currents had pulled them apart. he should have fought harder; he knew he should have.          ❝  it’s no matter now. the past is the past. i have no interest in marriage anymore. ❞

          how could he when every time he thought of marriage he saw her and all that could have been?

@myriamed

[ofblacktyde]

what is one thing you wish to do before you die?

        ❝  i hope to go on a good many adventures before i die, hopefully during a daring event for what other death is fit for an ironborn? what those adventures bring i care little for as long as they are full of danger and excitement. ❞

[ofblacktyde]

what future do you see for yourself?

        ❝  while i know i will soon become lord of blacktyde castle, i don’t like to confine my future to my current expectations. one’s future can change in an instant and i’d prefer to be surprised than know exactly what is going to happen. whatever will come i will face it head on. ❞

[ofblacktyde]

would you call yourself a pirate?

        ❝  well, i have done my fair share of raiding through the years and i spend most of my days at sea. not to mention that people say pirates are ruggedly handsome so i fulfill all requirements. i guess you could call my a pirate if you’d like. ❞

[ofblacktyde]

if you could kill anyone without getting caught, who would you kill and why?

        ❝  only one? i’m afraid my list of people i’d like to see dead is far too long for me to only choose only one to kill. ❞

[ofblacktyde]