matcha

[ofbrokenfaith]

Fallon De Martel + Childhood

[ofbrokenfaith]

Fallon De Martel + Favorite Food

[emmaharwoods]

ZENDAYA — at the NMACC Gala (April 1, 2023)

[ofbrokenfaith]

The past was the past. That was what she kept trying to tell herself. She had spent the last few months cleaning herself up, forcing herself through the withdrawals. She and Orion had found a system that worked; as long as she siphoned a little bit of magic from the Mystic Falls border every few days, Fallon was able to operate as a mostly normal human. She had desperately pieced her life back together after JD’s death, not wanting to go out the same way. She lived her life for them now, for JD and Tyson, in their memory. It was the reason that she had decided to enroll in school again after a semester away. One of them had to make something of themselves and clearly that had been left to hers. “It’s just class. It’s going to be fine. You can do this.” @sanguishqsstarters​

[ofbrokenfaith]

Fallon De Martel + FBI AU 

[maritza-pizza]

[ofbrokenfaith]

@hoaxwings

[experienceandobservation]

Zendaya | Bulgari Mediterranea High Jewelry Event in Venice | May 16, 2023 | 📷 German Larkin

[ofbrokenfaith]

This couldn’t be happening again. The last time that Fallon had a man that she loved lying motionless on the floor, she’d had to make a choice. Saving JD over Tyson had been the logical choice at the time but she didn’t regret it. The youngest Salvatore brother couldn’t be saved with vampire blood the way that Ty could and she had done what she could. It just hadn’t been enough. A text to come meet had pulled her out of the house for the first time in days. At least a brief meet up with her sometimes enemy, sometimes friend would distract her from the fact that no matter how many locater spells she did, she couldn’t find Sev. He’d been on the floor and she was desperate to find a way to save him again. Stupid human cure blood wouldn’t do it but God, she hoped that medicine would. Three digits dialed into a keypad and just minutes later she could hear the sirens pulling up. She couldn’t ride in the ambulance, didn’t want to know how this story ended. Instead, numb and broken and terrified, she stumbled out of the apartment and started her trudge towards the hospital. It wasn’t far. It would give her time to think of what the hell she was going to say to his family. Jen Salvatore was going to murder her if JD didn’t survive. Her eyes shone with tears that were desperate to spill over, blurring her vision. She wiped them away with frustration, shaking her head. “This can’t happen again. Not again. Not again.” 

@sanguishqsstarters​

[ofbrokenfaith]

griefbuilt​:

of  all  the  stupid  goddamn  bullshit  luck  in  the  world….of  course  the  first  thing  that  would  happen  upon  getting  back  would  be  meeting  a  very  hungry  newbie  vampire.  of  course  it  would  try  to  make  a  nice  little  snack  out  of  him.  why  the  fuck  wouldn’t  it  ?  but  god,  he  just  didn’t  have  the  time  right  now  to  mediate  or  have  some  sweet  little  come  to  the  light  moment.  hence  the  greying  corpse  at  his  feet  (  god  it  was  always  so  strange  to  see  the  life  bleed  from  them  like  that  ).  poor  son  of  a  bitch.  but  he  was  on  a  mission  —-  funerals  for  the  damned  be  fucked.  without  giving  it  much  thought,  he  began  dragging  the  body  through  the  woods  —–  to  somewhere  a  little  less  inconspicuous.  he’d  kick  some  dirt  and  leaves  on  it  and  call  it  a  day.  find  his  kids.  pretend  this  obnoxious  little  detour  through  the  forests  of  mckinley  never  happened.  that  was  the  plan  at  least…..fucking  footsteps.  jesus  fucking  christ,  really  ?   a   sigh.  he  dropped  the  body.  looked  up  at  the  person  approaching.  “  yeah….this  is  exactly  what  it  looks  like.  “ 

@sanguishqsstarters​

The realization came to her in a dream. It was the only thing that her nightmares had given her recently that had been of any use. The last time that Fallon had felt a sense of eqilibrium in herself was when she had been channelling Lizzie and it gave her an idea. If she could simply get more magic, maybe the withdrawals would stop. A hit of coke was no longer working to even her out, maybe a hit of magic would do the trick. There was magic all over the woods of Virginia and she had been off to find some kind of sacred spot when she saw him. It was the Jeremy that she knew, she could just tell. She had spent as much time at the Gilbert house as her own growing up, always tagging along at Theo and Tyson’s heels. The only blessing about the parents being asleep was that she never had to see the anguish in Jeremy’s face when he found out that Tyson was dead and it was her fault. Well, until now, of course. “You’re not supposed to be here,” she breathed, taking a step forward slowly as if moving too fast might cause the older man to bolt. “I want to hug you but I’m not sure I should.”

[ofbrokenfaith]

gilbertslytheriin​:

he wasn’t use to seeing fallon like this, of course he’d seen her hanging out with tyson before now and maybe it was because his brother wasn’t here that he felt for her.  kneeling in front of her, he gave a nod of his head, “ i’m not going anywhere fal– you don’t have to worry bout that.” it was truer then she knew. eventually, he was sure they would all have to go home. but theo wouldn’t be one of them. when or if that time came that they had to travel  back to the future- theo had every intention of seeing them off . this place , this time,  was his home now. but he didn’t think telling her this was wise. so he did what he normally did if his sister’s were crying, embracing fallon as she continued to let out her emotions. “ come on, i’ll get you home and get you to bed alright?” he was wondering what she meant about tyson but now didn’t seem the right time to ask not when she was this upset.

There were moments that Fallon felt closer to Theo than her own brother. Phoenix did his best but they were in two vastly different phases in life; he was raising a baby and she was fighting for her life. She wasn’t exactly the kind of help that he was looking for these days. Theo, however, was still a little rougher around the edges and it made her feel more comfortable being herself with him. “You have to promise,” she pleaded, eyes wide as she looked up at him. “I can’t lose anyone else. I’m not strong enough.” God, wasn’t that the truth? This entire descent into addiction had really kicked off once Tyson had died and she’d lost JD. The idea of a single other person she cared for leaving her was too much to bear. “Okay,” she answered weakly, giving him a shaky smile. Her cheeks flushed at the fact that she had to ask but the heretic knew that Theo wouldn’t judge. “Can...can you help me get there? I’m not sure I can do it on my own.” 

[ofbrokenfaith]

griefbuilt​:

raging,  seething,  boiling  thing  lurking  in  their  chest  screamed.  writhed  and  clawed  and  bared  it’s  teeth.  it  wanted  fallon  fucking  dead.  she  who  had  almost  ripped  their  world  at  it’s  seams.  who  taken  the  crown  fucking  jewel  in  his  hoard.  who  had  nearly  stripped  them  of  the  one  fucking  good  thing  that  had  happened  to  them  in  the  past  few  years…..and  all  this  from  someone  who  was  supposed  to  be  a  friend.  someone  who  they  cared  about.  oh,  they  could’ve  fucking  killed  her.  left  her  a  pile  of  ash  and  regrets  a  few  years  earlier  he  might’ve  (  they’d  set  people  on  fire  for  less  )  but  now-  “  barely.  if  you  weren’t  dead  already,  i  think  you  would  be.  “  and  that  ?  it  wasn’t  nearly  as  pleasing  of  a  thought  as  it  should’ve  been.  they  couldn’t  rip  into  her  when  she  was  like  this.  wouldn’t  get  any  satisfaction  from  it,  only  that  cloying  dread  settling  in  his  stomach.  fuck  !  they  didn’t  want  to  worry  about  her….  they  held  out  a  hand.  “  we’re  going  back  to  mine.  you  need  food  if  you  can  keep  it  down.  water.  something  to  do  so  you  aren’t  wallowing  in  how  shitty  you’re  feeling  all  day.  “ 

Out of all the Forbes kids, the two that terrified her the most were Lizzie and Skylar. Sure, Reine was a tribrid and Cameron was a demigod but the two of them could at least be reasoned with, she could appeal to their emotions. In her experience, Lizzie and Sky were loose cannons that could be just as quick to kill you as they were to kiss you and Fallon wasn’t looking forward to being on this side of their wrath. If she hadn’t been shaking before Sky came into her line of sight, she certainly was now. Surprise was evident in every feature on her face as the dragon offered her a hand instead of immediately setting her ablaze. “Kind of wish that I was,” she answered honestly. The way that she was feeling was worse than waking up in transition. Fallon accepted their hand, dragging herself to her feet slowly. Her knees were quivering with effort, tears in her eyes at the kindness of their offer. “Why are you being nice to me? You should hate me. You should want to kill me.” 

[ofbrokenfaith]

ofxpressicns​:

“You know me? My dear ole brother been telling you about his favorite sister,” She said with a smirk. “You’re not slick, sweetheart. I’ve been seeing you around him. Why?”

“Something like that,” Fallon answered, not wanting to give all her cards up at once. She doubted that this version of her mother was prepared to have children, let alone meet the adult version of them. “I’ve been helping him with a few spells, he’s been giving me a place to stay. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship.” 

[ofbrokenfaith]

hoaxwings​:

The male had no idea how he was going to clean her up, but he knew that was what she needed. His brother had gone through a similar stint a while back. “I do but you’re not getting any.” He stated flatly as he made his way around the bar. “If you’re going to start this withdrawal stage you might want to commit it. It’s a bitch to keep going back and forth.” There was a gleam in his eye that accompanies his words, as he took out the rag from underneath the table knowing that Katherine probably was using this state of mind for her own benefit. Though he would defend the fellow vampire – or rather dark lighter – through everything, it didn’t mean he had his own opinions and choices. This clearly was one he was going to take and deal with the consequences with later. Grabbing the cleaner spray, he covered the counter top before swiping the rag, “When are you planning to go to rehab?”

Fallon couldn’t help but glare the second that he refused to provide her with any kind of relief for her current situation. She understood his perspective; she didn’t agree with it, was all full of resentment and bitter quips about how she was the one suffering here and no one else but didn’t bother letting them spill out. He wouldn’t care and she’d just get frustrated. “If I could get past the pain part of it all, it wouldn’t be a second thought. But every time that it gets too bad, I break.” Her head was in her hands as tried to make the world stop spinning. Just one moment of reprieve was all she was asking, just one single moment. A scoff came at the question and she raised an eyebrow. “You got some kind of fucking vampire rehab in your insurance network that you wanna share with the class? Because I doubt any normal place is ready to handle my whole slew of issues.” 

[ofbrokenfaith]

ofxpressicns​:

Noelle gave Fallon a soft smile, seeing the woman shiver. She heard her words and felt tears come to her eyes. “I’m trying to make myself believe that,” She admitted. “I’ve done some bad things. Things I’m not all that proud of. But this baby… I never want them to feel like they were a bad choice,” She admitted. She helped Fallon up. “Do you need me to sit with you or anything?” She was worried about her.

Fallon was glad that Noelle had the baby to focus on. They were the girls that were left behind, the wreckage of Lucien Castle’s past, and they were both struggling right now. At least one of them had something left to live for. “I think that you’ll be just fine,” she answered with a weak smile. Pulling herself to her feet was slow, treacherous work but she flashed a soft smile as she was finally upright. “Nah, it’s fine. Just don’t wanna do the hard shit in front of you.” There was no point in lying, after all. Noelle would see the difference as soon as she was done. 

[ofbrokenfaith]

fleetingmcmories​:

cold sweats, the complete flush of color from her face — olivia was no stranger to the physical signs of someone being in withdrawal. it was a helpless feeling that she had never experienced for herself but she came from a family of wealth and riches. using substances to fill a void that money could not was more common in that circle than one may think. the glitz and glamor was only a facade. a veil that kept the reality of it all so well hidden. fallon was a good person. misguided, for sure, but olivia liked her. she didn’t know the younger female as well as she would’ve liked but the want to was there. leaning down to meet her at eye level, she waved with a small wag of her finger. “ good morning, sunshine. ” olivia took a quick glance at the watch on her wrist. “ it’s noon. have you eaten anything ? ”

“Oh, babe, if you think that I’m sunshine then you really don’t get out enough,” she answered, holding her head in both hands in an attempt to get the world to stop spinning. All she wanted was to find a way to stop the physical symptoms; the cold sweats, the shaking, the nausea...all of it was driving her insane. Taking another bump used to be the solution but that hadn’t worked since Lucien had died. Fallon didn’t know if her body was reacting to the grief that she refused to let herself feel but whatever was happening to her was something that she needed to be over once and for all. There was no handbook for this but fuck, she needed answers. “God, no. Just thinking about eating makes me want to puke on your way too expensive shoes. Keeping anything down isn’t an option right now.” 

[ofbrokenfaith]

hoaxwings​:

He was not going to go anywhere. Sev knew that much about the situation. Good or bad, he was in it for sure. Coming to this territory kind of solidified that much. There had been a hesitation at the start, he preferred neutral places. Especially with the news of darklighters, and how delicately Grace had put their entire existence. However, he figured if this was the place that Fallon had decided on then this was perhaps where she felt the most safe at. She looked different – not the same. It took him a while to be able to put it together. After all, this was perhaps the first experience he had with an addict. The last couple of days he had spent his days doing his research, trying to see if there was an alternative to rehab. The idea of Fallon having to go somewhere for any duration just didn’t sit right with him. Even if it was the rightthing to do. Yet everything he kept finding kept pointing to that being the right path. Keeping her outside of a rehab meant having to control too many variables that no sane human could truly do, and even as a whitelighter he had to accept his limitations. “You look like you’re struggling,” he responded as he raised a brow while trying his best to be nonchalant but honesty was truly his down fall. Being in front of her made him realize how much he had missed her. Even with all the chaos and uncertainty he still wanted to be part of her life. See her, talk to her and be near her. “Had to attend some work meetings,” The elders had also managed to pencil him in for a couple of remarks regarding his soft approach with everything. “How have you been? – anything I missed?”

Sev didn’t mince words and it was part of the reason that she liked him. Fallon cringed at the honest assessment of her condition, hating that she was so terrible at hiding the fact that she was suffering. “I’m struggling,” she confirmed. It wasn’t something that she liked admitting but lying to Sev had never gotten anything except in trouble. “I haven’t been able to keep anything down for a few days. When I first started using, I used to be able to keep myself fairly even but with the vampire side, my metabolism is too fast and my tolerance is too high. No matter how much I do, I can’t keep the withdrawal symptoms at bay. It hurts. Blood bags are helping a bit, but it’s still pretty much just constant pain.” She was trying this honesty thing on for size, too, and giving him an idea of her condition was the only chance that she had at allowing him to provide some kind of help. Not that there was anything that he could really do to fix her; healing herself was an independent journey but having someone to talk to about it was a relief. She smiled at the mention of his work meetings, knowing that that meant the elders had called him in for one reason or another. “And how were those?” Fallon hoped desperately that he hadn’t gotten in trouble for her kiss at Thanksgiving. It hadn’t been his fault and Sev had only been a gentleman that night and every night sense. He didn’t deserve to suffer for yet another one of her mistakes. She shrugged at his question. “I haven’t been too social lately. If you’re asking if I’ve behaved myself, the answer is yes. I’m still trying to find a way to make it up to Klaus and Stefan and Caroline, but I haven’t let myself get sucked into anything else. Other than that, I’ve mostly just been trying to get to know Tristan.” 

[ofbrokenfaith]

demartcl​:

“That’s ridiculous.” Tristan spoke without the venom he would usually abhor for such a statement. This wasn’t an enemy and this wasn’t a debate, this was his niece who currently lacked just about anyone currently and he would be damned if he didn’t step forward and let her fall. No one else appeared to try and pick her up, and if that left Tristan alone to do then so be it. “The only inconvenience and bother in my life is Lucien Castle and that remains unavoidable.” Because the words were spoken with both factuality and deep affection that Tristan struggled to faucet. “Has anyone ever told you I appreciate easy? Enjoying a challenge is something I pride myself upon. If I only stuck around easy people then my life would dreadfully dull.” He told her. She looked tired, for a vampire. Exhausted. Something that wasn’t easily with immortality on your belt. “I wouldn’t know. I don’t typically try talking about things either.” It wasn’t a confession he made easily on account of it’s truthful nature. He was used to being the shoulder for everyone to depend on, not shedding his own walls. This situation required something different though and for his niece, he would try for it. “So I suppose yes, it is.” He offered something of a smile to her. “I don’t suppose you’d like some tea as well? Typically it’s soothing.”

A surprised little smile broke across Fallon’s features at her uncle’s answer, warmth settling in her chest at the notion that someone actually wanted her for once. It was a feeling that she was completely unfamiliar with ever since Tyson died but one that she happily welcomed. A wry chuckle escaped her at the comment about Lucien, sadness settling in her eyes at the sound of his name. “I’m sorry that I couldn’t save him,” she whispered, vulnerability in her eyes as she apologized to Tristan. “I know that it’s possible to get him back, I’m just not really in the best shape to do that right now. But I’ll get stronger. I promise.” She didn’t want to let him down and it was obvious that her uncle missed his friend. Fallon tried to push herself into a sitting position, groaning at the effort that it took to do so. Even the smallest of labors left her breathless these days, but she tried not to make it too apparent. “I guess we’re kind of the same there. I almost enjoy when people tell me I can’t do something. It makes it that much sweeter when I prove them wrong.” The heretic nodded in understanding when Tristan agreed that the inability to open up was a familial trait, smiling proudly at the idea again. She belonged somewhere. It was comforting to realize. “I keep seeing the things that I did to them that day in my head, like a sin that I can’t escape. I feel guilty for what I did to them, but I feel guilty for not saving Uncle Lucien, too. I had to sift inside Caroline’s head in order to pull information for him and that’s what replays the most when I sleep. The torture she was put through by Uncle Lucien and her own father. I wish I could just get rid of it, scrub my mind.” At the question, she nods. “Sure. Tea sounds nice.”