Grayson

Liberal Former Gryffindor Corrupter of Purebloods My Eldest Brother Written for Grayson Wood, by: Dot His showers of sweets and glee, fill a void in my soul. The sound of his laughter, warms the lonely cold. I am grateful for his presence, in this dark and empty world.

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

/flops/

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

Oliver's gingerbread house

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

Katie's Gingerbread house. Quite literally.

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

[sugardaddyprincess-deactivated2]

im like a kitten i need attention and i need to curl up next to you and i need you to pet me and tell me im cute

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

OWL FROM DOTTLE!!!

My Dearest Froghead,

Our quiet haven awaits your arrival. Hope to see you soon.

Dot

i wasn't expecting you to be ready for me today, but in afterthought it's exactly what i need. i'll be right over, leaving now

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

We missed you today. Just letting you know that you were on our mind. I hope all is well.

Congratulations to the both of you. I hope you’ll both be very happy together, and best wishes on the years to come.

Grayson Wood

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

James watched Grayson move over to his pet sloth. He didn’t want to fight with him anymore. They weren’t supposed to fight, they were supposed to be happy and having fun. But James did not think Grayson was right about anything else. They should be allowed to be angry with each other, because first he was his friend and if roles were reversed, James would be angry. Of course he let him overstep his bounds, of course he let him fight him like they were so much more than what they started as, because they were. James was offended that Grayson didn’t see it the way and it showed in his face.

“No, no, no. No.” James pushed himself up off the floor, shaking his head in protest. “You aren’t going to do this now. You can’t look at me and tell me that this is nothing and that you mean nothing to me. Like this means nothing to me.” He was next to him now, putting his hand on his chest and then touching his own. “We both knew walking into this that it wasn’t going to be rainbows and butterflies all the time. We’re adults with busy lives and we can’t be as carefree as we want to be. But, that’s what a relationship is! Learning from each other and growing and moving past things like this so we can fix the problems.” James was frustrated, at everything, he held both of his hands in his hair and tugged and groaned.

“Do you want this? Me? It doesn’t sound like you want to be here anymore. I want you Grayson.” He removed his hands, leaving his hair disheveled. He placed one hand on Grayson’s heart, like he had done on their first date. “Merlin knows, I need you, baby. I really do. But, if you don’t want me anymore, if I’m too complicated or if you just can’t handle this anymore, I can’t force you to stay.” It hurt to say those words, and it hurt more to hold back what he knew he truly felt for the man. He pulled away and moved back over to the wall, placing his forehead against it and bracing his weight with his hands. “If you have to go, I will hate it, but you have to do what you have to do.” His tone was one of hurt and defeat. James hoped he didn’t leave, but did not know what else he could say to make him stay.  

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

Grayson's head snapped up at the mantra of 'no's James flung at him, momentarily caught off guard because he was certain that all that needed to be said that night already had been. After the first statement, his expression was just one of bewilderment. What had just happened? For one infuriating moment, he thought he was going to bring up their argument about his work back into play, and if he had, Grayson would've stopped sugar coating everything with understanding and logic. They'd already done that bit and worn it out.

When the following words finally processed, despite his wishes for otherwise, Grayson's back stiffened and his jaw tightened. It was a feeling of dread, and it settled thick and heavy in his belly, even as he felt James' hand on his chest. He blinked up at him, finding it difficult to form words. He twitched his nose instead, wetting his lips to bide himself a little bit of time. "James," he started out slowly, not looking at him. "I was upset earlier and I didn't mean to throw out any substantial terms for a relationship. I honestly don't feel like we're there yet, especially since... this... hasn't come out to more than my family and Lily. I understand that you have your reasons and there's no pressure for it really, but it's... I thought this was casual," he finished lamely.

Oh, but he wanted it, wanted it so badly. He wanted to trust someone, and be needed in return. He wanted the fighting, because this honestly wasn't that bad. He wanted the late nights and the morning breath and the smell of fresh coffee in the morning, quick breakfasts and the scarily domestic evenings. He closed his eyes, unable to relent or deny, suddenly wrapping his arms around himself once more. He stood silently for a moment, then unexpectedly sniffled. "I don't think I can ask that much from you. You already spread yourself so thin, and I need someone who's going to be a constant in my life. I can't... can't just be here when you remember me. I'm needy and clingy and I need a physical presence near me. I hate being alone, I don't handle it well. You're not the one who's complicated, I am. But I don't want to go." He lowered his head, clutching tightly to his elbows. "And I hate myself that I'm so selfish, I can't - I can't do this to you."

He became aware of himself, then, as if the words had the effect of unfreezing him and prompting him to start moving. "I told you from the beginning that I can't handle anything complicated," he croaked, fumbling around until he remembered his shoes were by the door. He pulled them on hastily, not daring to look in James' direction so he couldn't see his face or his reaction to what he was doing. He said he wasn't going to stop him, and he trusted him to make due on his word. He stepped outside and pulled the door closed after him. He'd only gotten a few steps before the tears came. He pressed himself against the wall and forced himself to breathe. This was a good thing. It didn't feel like it now, but it would be in the long run.

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

As much as James didn’t want to admit it, especially to Grayson right then, what he said was true. If the owl never came, he would still be at his desk, working furiously underneath that yellow lamplight. He would have stayed until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore and the growling in his stomach had ceased and turned into a dull pain. Grayson was right, he had been the first one there that morning, arriving even before his own father and was definitely the last one to leave. So many times he had been the very last person to walk out of the Ministry in a whole, minus the security and night staff. Was it really so many times to count? James tried to tick off his fingers and gave up, turning round to face Grayson again.

“You know that is not how I meant it. I know very well how fucking brilliant you are and I never said your career does not make any kind of a difference. Hell, if I was half as good on that goddamn broom of yours as you are, I’d be glad to take the job. Anytime you want to fucking switch, let me know. Because just one day I would love to go to work and have it make someone smile, like you guys do every bloody time you play. Just one god damn time!” He clenched his teeth, his face going red with emotion. “I would love to go to work and make someone happy. Because that’s what you do, you make people happy. They come from all corners of the country and beyond to see you play. I get to tell mother’s and father’s and family and friends that some psychopath killed their loved one for what? To prove some stupid point? For fun? I get to make them cry and promise that I will do everything I can to make it right.” He sniffed now, wiping an offending tear from his cheek.

James was back where he started, leaning against the wall. He slid down it, placing his head in his hands. “I don’t know how to stop.” His voice was muffled in his hands. He sniffed again and groaned picking his head up and roughly hitting it against the wall behind him. There was a glimmer of hope that it may knock some sense into his head, but all it did was send a sharp pain through him. He wanted to tell Grayson everything, how bad it had really gotten with Melaina, but he couldn’t. No one would be able to forgive him for that. “I just, I want it all to end. I keep pushing and pushing, thinking it will get better if I just try harder. I don’t know how to stop it.” He shook his head, exhausted.

“If you have to go… go. But, please, don’t say it was because I don’t want this work. Dammit Grayson I l-” James stopped himself there, realizing what almost rolled off his tongue in the heat of the moment. He realized he would have truly meant it to, regardless if he was supposed to feel it or not. “I like you, a lot but, if you don’t think you can be with me… I don’t know what to tell you. Leave if you must, just go!” James wanted to fight him more, but he couldn’t. He knew there should be more words there. He should explain himself further, but he was just out of words to express what he wanted to say to make him stay.  

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

"Oh my god!" Grayson pushed himself up off of the arm of the couch. "Don't try to mollify me, that isn't how this is going to work. You don't get to make me feel bad with an elaborate explanation and telling me that people die. I know that, and it isn't fair! You do what you do to help those people who do lose someone sleep at night and that's where we're going to leave it. Fuck!"

He turned away from James, walking away from him and their argument to stand beside P.O.R.N.'s habitat. He opened it up to pet the sloth, having grown attached to the little terror in the time he'd spent with James. Feeding him a hibiscus flower, Grayson glanced over his shoulder very briefly. "We're supposed to be having fun." His voice was quiet now, the fight having withered away and died. "I didn't want this. It's supposed to be uncomplicated and relaxing. If we're being completely honest here, I shouldn't even be as angry as I was. It isn't fair to you that I'm holding you up to such high standards when we both know how very little you owe me."

He pulled away from the habitat, closing it slowly. "I'm overstepping my bounds, James, and you're letting me. This is supposed to be casual, and we're fooling ourselves into thinking this is anything more than that, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I'm letting my emotions get the best of me, you know I have a lot on my mind right now, and it doesn't give me any right to attack you. I just... Do you- do you think...? Is it wise for us to keep doing this? Is it even what you want? You clearly have other things you need to see to and a simple dinner wasn't going to get in the way of it. I understand, I do. You shouldn't have to defend anything to me."

It was killing him, to say these words to him, in the distantly calm tone he was using. He didn't want them to fight anymore, but even so, he wanted just a little more... something - anything! - from James to show that he wasn't just going to let him leave. He was starting to dismiss the importance of himself in other people's lives, and that was probably what all of this was really about. While he'd definitely gotten in a few points on other areas James needed to work on, he wanted to know that James needed him there. He knew he didn't, but he'd been feeling so small lately, and now that the fight was gone, he wasn't sure what he ought to do now. Perhaps it was better if he just left.

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

“I’m here now, aren’t I? Does that not say something in the very least?” James was staring into his glass, swirling the liquid inside of it. His voice was low and each word calculated. At the start of the accusations thrown upon him, he was accepting of them. Logic told him that he deserved to be scolded, he understood it and accepted that fate before Grayson had even began to speak. But, as he continued on his demeanor changed to one of defense. As much as he felt bad, he did not think what he was doing with his work was unhealthy in the least. He could not see why anyone in the world would think he should slow down, work less, or be less dedicated to stopping criminals from destroying their community.

“Look, I realize you’re upset. Hell, you have every right to be. I should have paid closer attention to the time, I should have let you know if I was running late. I know, I know, I know. But, I did not forget about you, Grayson. I simply lost track of time. That’s all this is.” James paused to finish the liquid in his glass and set it aside. “What I do in my work is important, I don’t understand why you can’t see that. Yes, I may sacrifice some of my free time when I think there is something new to bring down Melaina. Hell, you may be right, all this may lead to another lead but I have to keep trying. I have to.” James pushed himself off the wall and began to pace. “She’s killing people, Grayson. Who’s to say next time she doesn’t go after Lily? Or Dot? Or Clive? What then? Do you still think I should slow down, back away or would it be worth my time to pursue her then?” His voice was only slightly raised at this point.

“I do not need room to breath, I just need…” James paused and moved over to him, crouching down and taking hold of both of his hands. “I need understanding. I still want you just as much as I did in the beginning, my feelings for you have done nothing but grown. My work is important to me, but that does not mean you are any less important. I just want you to see why I do what I do.” James could not see the problem, he was blinded by why he was having to defend his career. “My family has never said anything to me, and if they’re really as worried as you say they are then I’ll go over for dinner. Hell, you’re welcome along since it seems they are able to express themselves better to you than their own son!” He stood back up and ran his fingers through his combed back hair. “I just.. I don’t see why I have to defend my job, my work. This is my livelihood, I don’t ask you to defend the time you spend on the pitch and all the interviews and games you have to play.”  

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

"Only because I fucking owled you!" Grayson snapped. "I have no doubt in my mind that if I hadn't, you would still be clocked in, hard at work. And that's the problem. You can't seem to get enough of it, and I can bet every galleon I have in Gringotts that you were the first one there this morning, and the last one still before you came to fetch me." He stopped then, to look at James, and his exasperation only grew to realise that James actually believed everything he was telling him. He curled his hands into fists, letting his nails dig into his palms in an effort to centre himself, bring himself down from the ridiculous heights he knew he could get to when he was worked up.

"Stop, stop. Stop it," Grayson waved his hands about, as if doing so would physically make James stop speaking and put an end to the false admissions of wrong-doing. "This isn't about missing our date anymore. This is about you actively going out of your way to choose your work over your own well-being, be it with the relationship with me and your family or your commitment to the community. Yes, you should persue her. Yes, you should do so as swiftly as possible, but James, you're only one person. And she's only one person. You can't expect to take her on when you're running on lack of sleep, a meal from three days ago, and enough caffeine to bring down a baby elephant. And don't you bring our littles into this. I know fucking well the threat hanging above their heads every morning when they leave their homes, so don't you dare confuse my anger with you for lack of comprehension on their personal safety!"

He let James soothe his hands open, to smooth over the places where his nails bit into his flesh. As much as he hated to admit it just then, especially to James, who he was definitely angry with, he needed that touch. "Have you not heard me at all?" he nearly whispered, glancing just over James' shoulder. "I understand what you do, and I know that it's incredibly important. I'm not stupid. Just because I make a living riding a sodding broom doesn't mean that I lack the intellect to know that your job makes a difference and mine doesn't, so thanks for that. I feel so much better now, thank you." The sarcasm couldn't have been any thicker.

It took him a moment before he could pick up the pieces of his pride to meet James gaze, and he gave up. He was weary, exhausted, and arguing with the other man was like walking into a brick wall, and stubborn as he was to not want to give in, he knew it was only going to be so long before he just... couldn't. "Are you certain your family doesn't say anything to you? Even subtly? No 'You should go home' or 'Here, I brought you a sandwich'? You don't see why you have to defend your job. I don't see why I have to defend your family. Or this. Us. What is this, this thing we are doing? Are we trying to make this work when we know it won't? Tell me something because I'm hard pressed not to walk out of that door right now, please!"

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

James was already halfway to the kitchen when Grayson refused a drink. He backtracked his steps to see what exactly he did want to do. That was a mistake. One look at the man leaning against the door and he knew that there was going to be a fight. He braced himself for what was about to come. The words that fell out of Grayson’s mouth stung more than he thought they would. He moved back towards the kitchen while listening, briefly looking up to see him sit on the couch arm. Even if Grayson did not want something to drink, James did. A stiff one at that.

“Wait, you talked to Lily?” There was a brief moment where he flushed with embarassment. It had been the second time that week that he rescheduled lunch with his baby sister because he got too wrapped up in his work. She had brought lunch to him this time, demanding some sort of attention from him. He only complied for a short time, long enough for him to consume the sandwich. There was another promise made to make up for the one broken, he swore this time he would take his break with her. Had she really been so upset to complain to Grayson? She did not seem so angry at the time, but it was possible she was being nice, maybe because of Grayson coming to his defense.

Back to the matter at hand, James started sipping his straight glass of scotch. He leaned against the wall across from where Grayson sat and loosened his own tie. “I am committed to you, it was a mistake. It was a horrible mistake and I am terribly sorry for it. I don’t know how else I can apologize to you to make it right.” He pulled the tie over his head and cast it aside. “Look I know I get a little involved with my work from time to time and I get a little too consumed with my cases. But, I swear Grayson, you mean the world to me and I really was looking forward to spending the night with you.” He moved forward for just a moment to touch his hand, then pulled it back thinking it better to wait.  

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

"Of course I spoke with Lily. She is my friend. We had tea to forego the appetite she was saving for you, and then she helped me pick out what to wear after you more or less blew her off. She wished me luck tonight, and I was really under the impression that she was joking. I wanted her to be joking. It isn't healthy, how you work. I get that this is important to you, really I do, I just..." Grayson glanced down at his hands in his lap, then shrugged. "I only wanted to see you, for an hour at least. If you had only told me that you were busy, I would've been fine with dinner and left you to it, but no! You forgot about me!"

His voice had started rising now, the longer he was allowed to rant about it, to continue throwing out reasons to be angry with James, it was easier to believe them. "You forgot about me! But who am I compared to the dark witch herself, right? You got a new lead and now you can catch her more quickly, right? No, it only leads you to yet another lead, and another, and what after that? Another lead! Do you realise what you're sacrificing, working all these hours? And not only time with me, but with your family. They're worried about you. Hell, James, I've visited with them more than you have. And when you're not in the office, you're in that bloody room over there!" Here, he snapped his arm out in the general direction of James' home office.

"I bet that if you were able to marry your job, you wouldn't even be bothering with me, right? Or is that the point? Have I become cumbersome to you? Am I too attached? Too needy? Do you need room to breathe?" He stopped as he watched James reach out for him, eyes glued to the movement and his flesh tingling where he knew his fingers would make contact. But they didn't. This time he did glare. "You wanted to spend the night with me." It wasn't a question, just a hollow statement. "A night with me after the many nights in the beginning. Is this it? Has the spark gone out? I really need to know what's going on here, James, because if I'm just wasting my time, I'll bow out now."

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

James sighed heavily. He just wanted something, anything before they went somewhere else. Of course, Grayson was not accomodating him and really he should not have to. It was his own fault for being late. He should have remembered their night. Grayson was important to him and if this was how he treated people he thought were important, what did that make him? He stood still in front of Grayson a few moments longer, resisting his request for the tiniest of moments, though it never did take him very long to give in to the man.

“Alright, fine.” He threw his hands up and made sure his work bag was secure. James grabbed Grayson’s hand and apparated them both to the outside of his flat. He opened up his satchel and rummaged around for his keys. This took much longer than expected, because the keys were actually in his pocket. If his mind had not been preoccupied with the situation at hand he may have remembered that small detail, but instead he kept Grayson waiting longer and himself more frustrated in the search. “Sorry.” It was the short response he gave him when he finally managed to stop grumbling and remember where his keys were.

James opened the door to the flat and took off his shoes. “Let me take your coat.” He said, immediately putting his arm out so that he could hang it up. At this point he no longer wished to look Grayson in the eye. He did not want to see his anger towards him, whether he deserved to or not. James desperately wanted to forget anything ever happened, and go on with their night. He wanted to be forgiven and skip straight to the make-up period. “Do you want something to drink, hon?” It was an attempt to change the subject, with a pet name added just to sweeten the reaction. He knew it would be a miracle if it worked.   

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

Grayson stared at his shoes until James gave in and apparated them both back to his flat, and then again while James fumbled with his keys. He almost wanted to take pity on him and pet his hair and step forward to use his own key, but he remained where he was, using the time it took them to get inside to get his thoughts in order. He wanted to be prepared, and to have logical responses for why he was upset so he could get them out in a way James would be able to understand. He needed support while he was feeling out of sorts, and James couldn't do that when he wasn't available. It wasn't that Grayson expected him to blow everything off at the drop of the hat - that was why he'd scheduled their time together in advance. Again, weeks.

He slid his coat off at James' prompting, kicking off his shoes in turn, then loosening his tie to pull it off over his head. Once he'd gotten rid of the stuffy dresswear nonsense, he turned, leaning against the doorframe and subconsciously wrapping his arms around himself. It was a self-coping gesture he'd used all his life. "No," he replied to the offer, sighing softly and licking his lips. He wasn't really certain how he should proceed, or if he should wait for James to settle in before he kicked him where it hurt. He intended to do just that, actually, but then the words were out before he could stop himself.

"What the hell, James?" He'd thrown his arms out in exasperation, just a slight edge of hurt coating the words. "Seriously. I expected this, but I'd hoped for a note if you were held up. I even selfishly hoped that you would remember me after hearing that you made excuses for Lily, too. I defended you, I stood up for you, I fought for that tiny semblance of a working relationship that I thought we had. Merlin forbid you have a committment to your fucking boyfriend." He'd made his way across the room to sit on the arm of the couch, his face carefully neutral.

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

James stared back at Grayson catching the look in his eye and heard the curtness in his response. He felt awful and could tell that he was about to be in trouble. “Pumpkin?” he tried for some humor, but quickly saw that there was none to be had when flashed a smile that clearly was for show. James only moved from his spot when the waiter arrived and Grayson signaled he was ready to leave by asking for his assistance. 

He circled around the table and pulled out Grayson’s chair, offering him a hand to stand. Once he was up he silently held up his coat, moving it over his shoulders once his arms were inside. The look on Grayson’s face made James feel ten times worse than he had before he arrived. He knew he had screwed up. The sad part was that he had really been looking forward to this night. Just the week before he had been crossing off days and counting down to the circled date on his calender. James had been looking forward to a quaint public dinner and long night between the sheets with Grayson. Things had been going so well, he thought, until work got in the way again. Why do I always do this? He was internally scolding himself.

The short moments it took for the check to arrive were painful. James pulled out his wallet and covered the bill. He left it on the table and thanked the host as they left the restaurant together. It was outside when he found it safe to speak again, hoping that he could find some way to turn the night around. Anyway to make up for what he had done. “Well, let me have it. I deserve it. I missed our date.” James almost looked defeated while he spoke. “I really am sorry though, I was looking forward to this, I was. I don’t know how I let time slip by me. If it’s any consolation, I missed lunch with Lily today, too.” He sighed, knowing that it was not any better. He seemed to be the king of excuses lately.

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

Outwardly, Grayson was angry, unaccommodating and cold, but it was only because he was so frustrated and upset on the inside. In fact, he was surprised he was capable of maintaining the thinly controlled ire James was holding witness to. He didn't trust himself to say anything more personal until they were out of the public eye, lest he crumble and fall apart where he stood. He knew it would only be a short matter of time before he broke anyway. It was just his nature to let things build up and up and out of control.

He took James' hand when offered and slid on his coat, taking his time to fasten each button into place just to have something for his mind to focus on for just a few moments of peace. He then took James' arm to be led out into the cold. He didn't want to hear the apologies or the excuses, he wanted James to be there for him, distracting, soothing. Instead, he looked like he ought to be forced into a corner with his nose pressed against the wall thinking about his transgressions. It did little to help his case, and instead only served to make Grayson that much angrier. He wanted smiles and endearments even though he knew James would be feeling guilty. It didn't make sense, but he'd hoped James knew him enough to acknowledge that his forgiveness would come easily if he played his cards right. But Grayson wouldn't disappoint. If he wanted to be snapped at and have accusations thrown at him, so be it.

Once James confronted him outside the building, though, he didn't bother stopping to face him, actively rolling his eyes with a clipped, "Take me home, I'm not doing this here." He refused to say anything more, just continued to stand where he was and, though it was probably dumb considering his mood, trusted James to take them somewhere comfortable with privacy.

[jamesypott-deactivated20160227]

They say that true love hurts, well this could almost kill me | James & Grayson

James sat at his desk in the Ministry of Magic. He was pouring over open files on his desk, writing furiously on the note pad in front of him. There was new evidence brought to his attention and that gave him a whole new spurt of focused energy. By the time everyone else was leaving the office, he had reached a good groove and forgotten that his shift was over. This was common in his world. It was what made him the auror he was, he loved his work.

“Are you staying late again, James?” It was Harry, his father, leaving work after everyone else was gone. James snapped his head up and looked at the clock. He had a feeling, a strange feeling, that he was supposed to be getting ready for something. He felt like there was something he was supposed to do, but the feeling was only passing. James looked at his father and shook his head. “Yeah, I am getting close to a breaking point. I will head home soon.”

Harry looked worried, as he always did when he thought his son was spending way too much time at work. He did not press him about it anymore, he only patted his shoulder and wished him a good night before taking his leave. James went right back to work, letting time slip by him with each studious note he scrawled onto the pad of paper. The feeling of getting closer and closer was a rush that washed over him, feeding the passion he had for his work. He needed that rush, it was like some sort of addicting tonic that itched a scratch in his brain. The owl broke his trance and surprised him all the same.

You know, usually you let someone know beforehand if something comes up and you’re supposed to be meeting with them.

It was Grayson. Shit. They had dinner reservations that night. James glanced at the clock and he was well over fashionably late. Shit. Shit. Shit. He hated himself for it and pulled at his hair while he waited for a response as to where he should meet him now. In normal circumstance, this would not be a huge deal but, this was not the first time he’d been caught up at work. This was a habit of his. He had cancelled plans last minute, rescheduled, shown up late, or even not shown up at all a couple times. Not only to Grayson, but to his friends and family as well. His addictive nature to work was unhealthy and everyone around but James knew it.

The response came and James grabbed his coat. Leaving the Ministry he set his mind to making things right and how he was going to apologize this time. He apparated to just outside the restaurant, allowing himself a quick smoke before he faced an angry lover. It was not something he did regularly, only when stressed. He did not waste the time to finish it and made sure to spray himself with some cologne before walking inside. James moved past the host and straight to the table where Grayson was sitting. He held the back of the chair instead of sitting, with an apologetic look on his face. “I am so, so, so, sorry Grayson, I really did mean to be here on time.” He bit his bottom lip nervously before continuing. “There was new evidence and I just got stuck in the groove, I didn’t even realize what time it was until the owl came…” 

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

Grayson had left practise early to be on time for their reservation, wanting to get showered and dressed up for the date that had been made in advance for weeks. Weeks. He'd even circled the date on a calendar at James' flat and drawn several hundred hearts around it because he'd been feeling super affectionate at the time. He remembered colouring them in and telling James what he was going to do to him once they'd gotten back to the flat, in hopes that the mental visualisation would help him remember the date a little clearer. Grayson was adept in the language of innuendo, insinuation, and downright vulgarity. He'd been certain this wouldn't be a miss.

So even though he'd left James to his life and work to deal with his own devices and ghosts, it came as a surprise that he was stood up. He knew he should've owled him ahead of time, but some selfish part of him wanted to think James had been looking forward to their time together. He honestly wouldn't have felt as dejected as he did then, if it wasn't for the fact that James had done just this several times before, and Grayson was understanding and accepting enough to say 'Okay, that was one time' [which progressed to two times, and then four] and forgive all. It was a simple thing to reschedule, all those times before.

But this time, he wasn't having any of it. He sat himself at the table after waiting for a quarter hour, and continued on with his dining as the hour progressed into two. By the time he was finishing his third glass of champagne, he decided it was time to owl James and let him know he'd shown up and enjoyed the reservations on his own. A cruel part of him wanted to invite someone else once he realised he'd been stood up. As it was, he ordered a bottle of wine and grinned at the server who did little to hide his sympathetic expression until James finally did show up. He couldn't help turning his nose up at the work suit he'd worn to the Reservation-only restaurant, even though he knew James was leaving directly from his office.

"Well, hello Pumpkin. It's nice of you to finally show up," he purred, though he caught James' gaze and held it with determination and a dare to look away from him. He didn't break it even as he motioned for the waiter, telling him he was ready to go. He offered James a tight-lipped smile, but only because they were in public and if he started anything right then, the headlines tomorrow would surely centre around the Quidditch star going at it with the Auror son of Harry Potter over dinner. Not that they'd mention the Potter idiot having missed it. "Help me up, dear, and get my coat."

[melissarosier]

Thank you, Grayson. I would be careful what you offer though, I have been quite the bundle of emotion lately. I haven’t thought to talk to Scorpius about it because, well he’s going through enough. I know you do too, I just didn’t know who else would be able to help when it comes to him. *she gave him a smile and sipped her tea* I will try to talk to him and open up. I mean we have to do this otherwise I am seriously considering pushing the wedding back until I know he’s sure. I just really do not want to be a source of pain and regret in the future. *she paused to keep herself from losing composure* That would hurt me far worse than anything else in this world.

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

I wouldn't offer if I didn't think you needed it. I know what it's like to keep things in when you really need to talk about it, if not to discuss it, to at least get it out in the open. Perhaps if you shared a little with him about how you're feeling, he would be able to talk about what he's going through and release a little bit of that tension. I know I've always felt heaps better after a long talk with him, and really, a lot of times that's all we did. Sit and talk, drink and talk, play chess and talk. Talk and play music for a short break, and then talk again. I miss that. /reaches out to pat her hand reassuringly, then catches himself before he actually does/ Sorry. If he's asked you to marry him, he most likely thought about it to exhaustion, and as far as I can imagine, I'd like to think you're his top priority right now. Do what you need to do, even if it means pushing back the wedding, but keep in mind that he needs you probably as much as you need him right now. /quietly, studying his shoes/ Help him for me. Be his crutch, because he really does have... just a lot on his plate.

[ofcourseimagryffindor]

I have a couple different options of who it could be, but you are also welcome to choose someone of your liking. He will not be angry, I am positive of that. If the small chance happens that he does get angry, it will be with me and not you. Believe me, I can handle his anger. Like I said, if it is too much for you just let me know and I will understand but we are pressed for time so the sooner you can tell me, the better. It would mean so much to me if you did.

i’ll get back to you