she’s a part of harry he’ll never fully be able to reckon with — a part that’s easier to turn away from, to brush aside as he tries to position himself forward. she’s one of his oldest friends, and yet a drunken mistake. one of the greatest souls he’s ever known, and yet another name tacked onto the end of a long list of people who left too soon. who distanced themselves from harry when things got tough. he’d lost gwen stacy, and with her, mary jane. then in her wake, he’d lost michelle, too. of course, some cuts could be patched. like putting a bandaid on a bullet hole — if he didn’t think about gwen stacy, he didn’t have to grieve. if him and mary jane could keep lying to themselves, they could be together forever. but michelle ? she’s the wound that still stings. there’s no newfound sense of normality between the two of them, and harry’s inability to gain control of their friendship only drives him mad.
but she’s here, in front of him. right now, she’s alone. she’s not running away. he’s all but got her cornered. if harry can only act like the past few years haven’t happened, they can be normal. they can be okay. harry gives the brunette a thin-pressed smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes, nodding his head in acceptance of the offer. “ know what ? you’re right, ” he agrees. “ there’s this café on fifth. it’s on me, if you wanna catch up. ”
there’s something about the way he was standing there, looking at her, that filled her stomach with this sinking feeling. there was this pit in her stomach, it somehow grew, snowballing the more they stood there and looked at each other. the silence between them lingered, it was palpable, and the longer it lasted, the longer she was watching him, waiting for him to say something, the more she felt like she could be sick. and michelle can’t even tell why, which is the worst part. is it that on some level, she still feels something for him? is it just that feeling of what could have been, always wondering what they could have had? was it knowing that mary jane was with him, and that intuitive feeling, inkling of an idea that things weren’t going as well as they could have been? the frustration that mary jane got him first, even though she loved him first? or the guilt that she’d never told her sister about any of it; the feelings or the kiss?
it could be any of it. it could be any combination. michelle didn’t think she’d ever be able to place it exactly. it pained her, the look in his eyes, knowing that he didn’t smile at her like he meant it the way he used to. not like her smile was as real as it once was. the smiles they were exchanging were the same, mirroring each other. but it hurt from him, and she wondered - briefly, because she already knew the answer - if it hurt him, too. a part of her wished that he’d said no, let them just part ways, but here she was, going to get a bite to eat with harry osborn. “i hear you’re set to be ceo soon. you sure you have the time for little old me?” she teased. “not that i won’t take free food,” she added, a playful grin on her face.
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