starharbors:
With her arms wrapped around herself, Rowan can conceal the tremors flowing through her body. She can stand tall and straight, feign an indifference she doesn’t truly feel. But the facade she’s created can only last so long. Digging her fingernails into the flesh of her arms, she prays for the strength to carry on the remainder of this conversation. The last thing she needs is to make a fool of herself and hand-deliver yet another weapon for Helena to use against her.
Rowan stares long enough for it to be considered rude, critical eyes sweeping along Helena’s silhouette as if she were inspecting a machine rather than another person. “Why does it matter to you?” Her voice, though chilly before, grows positively frosty. There’s no reason for Helena to care, so why is she asking? What she does in Star Harbor won’t even affect the other girl. “To be frank, that’s not really any of your business anymore.” A sardonic smile tugs at her lips. “It’s not because of you, if that’s what you’re wondering.”
Rowan’s tone is icier than the chill coming off the ocean air. It cuts into her deep, and Helena is more hurt by it than she has any right to be. She has no right to be upset about what Rowan says or does in the face of everything she has said and done, but there’s no helping it. There’s no helping the vicious ache in her heart, or the way it still whispers about the feelings Helena has failed to move on from for the past few years.
She still longs for her. Helena can try to deny it all she wants, but she does. “I wasn’t... I didn’t think it was because of me.” It was the last thing on her mind, but she doesn’t blame Rowan for thinking it. She’s always been so self involved–it makes her sick to her stomach to think of all the times she shoved people under the bus to better herself. Rowan worst of all. “But you’re right, it’s none of my business.” As much as she wishes she could just leave it at that and walk away, she can’t. “I just—I hope you’ve been doing okay.” She regrets the words the second they come out of her mouth, and selfishly, she hopes for the backlash of a lifetime. God knows she deserves it.










