vi. these days
wow, so it’s been a minute. I don’t know if anyone who used to follow me is active anymore, but if you happen to be today and haven’t had a chance to look at my description, this past June I got to make the change from UCLA c/o 2020 to UCLA grad. here are some disorganized thoughts:
even though I was very on and off about updating this blog, the studyblr community and culture were constantly in the back of my mind throughout my last years of high school all the way through university. it’s wild to think I will not be a student (in the formal sense, though I’m sure I’ll always be learning) for at least a while, if not ever again.
honestly, I learned that for me, a lot of the growth that I experienced in regards to becoming a better student, dealing with everything to chronic illness and attention issues to heartbreak and the loss of loved ones, started with active self-compassion; mindfully making choices and decisions with my future self in mind, trying to make it easy as possible for future me. (and unsurprisingly, a lot of this growth happened when I took a step from this blog and didn’t try to grow for the sake of others)
I failed a lot- both in the academic sense and life sense- it really wasn’t intuitive for me to make decisions while actively showing compassion to myself. but I truly think that these failures and learning experiences got me to where I am today.
in the midst of a global pandemic, actively confronting internalized and systemic racism, a sea of job applications, and many despair-ridden early mornings of scrolling through LinkedIn comparing myself to others, I managed to find my own answer to “what do I do with a psychology major?”. and the adjustment has been tough at times and each day has its challenges, but I’m doing well.
so I guess this long soapbox post is dedicated to anyone who might be in a hard place, whether that be dealing with an impossible class or professor or any demons that school/2020/life throw at you; you’ve come so far and I am so proud of you. and I know it’s uncomfortable, but I urge you to be proud of yourself too.
I don't know if I'll be posting about work/my experience finding a job/early twenties finances and life/anything else on this blog or just running away again and revisiting this blog in another 4 months, but we'll just have to wait and see! until next time, take care
