This isn’t what I originally had planned for part 3, but Linkin Park hit me in the feels again and this happened.
It’s been a year since you lost Billy and you still couldn’t help but to blame yourself for his death. But you had your promise to keep, so you had to accept it for what it was. A tragedy.
Your mind drifted toward the good memories Billy asked you to think about when you had your bad moments, the memories only you and Billy shared; your talks about your future together. Moving to Cali, starting a family, the most beautiful beach wedding you could ask for. Because Billy loved you that much, he would do anything for you, including making your dream wedding a reality.
But that thought brought you back to reality, and you couldn’t help but sob. Yes you considered yourself Billy’s wife, you didn’t have his last name for nothing. It was the simple fact you were robbed of every future plan with him that hurt you the most. You were supposed to be happy together.
You’d been dreading this day; knowing that not many other people would be mourning for Billy like you because they didn’t know how bright a soul he truly was. You couldn’t help but think back to the night he died and the day after. A day where not a single news report regarding the incident had any mention of Billy, not a missing persons ad. Nothing.
These people made it seem as if Billy was nothing. Just another cover up story with no mentions of the truth. To them, Billy was just another unfortunate loss of life. Not like he deserved to live right? It’s not like he wasn’t the victim the whole time, right?
Wrong. You hated how people treated his death, as if it were nothing, and part of you felt Billy knew it was gonna happen that way too, which was why he had you make your promise. You had to share the good times you and Billy had together with everyone you two knew, show them that there truly were reasons Billy should be missed.
You were the main one. Your friends knew you loved Billy with your whole entire heart and soul and how living without him would be tough for you, but they never understood why. You helped to better Billy before he got possessed by the mindflayer, which in the end was what took it all away from you, and you weren’t going to just let his light go out. You were keeping it alive for as long as you live, to remind others that you were not going to let Billy die completely. You were keeping your promise.
Part of your promise, which Billy thought was totally silly when you mentioned it, was that you would act as if he were still there at home. He was always going to be in your heart, so you wanted him to still be part of your life. You’d leave an empty plate on the table for him, as if he’d come through that door at any moment and join you for dinner, even had a pack of cigarettes which you brought with you to every room you went.
But even in those comforting times, things still got tough. You’d have sudden bouts of anger, more toward the ones that took Billy away from you, not so much toward yourself since you accepted that there was nothing you could have done to save him. You just felt it wasn’t fair you had to live without him.
Unbeknownst to you, Billy witnessed it all. Your silly promise you kept and even the angry days. After passing, his spirit went right to you. If he couldn’t be with you in life, he was going to be there for you in his afterlife. He’d sit in the chair across from you while you ate, gently touch your hair when you watched TV, cup your cheeks in your angry moments and murmur that it was okay, and he’d even kiss you goodnight.
Though you couldn’t feel his every touch, Billy knew you felt he was still alive in your heart, and that was enough to satisfy him. Part of you wanted to believe he could be there, watching over you as you continued your life, kept your promise, but you also wanted him to just be at peace and in Heaven, where you knew he deserved to be.
Little did you know, Billy was in Heaven all along. You were his Heaven. He’d rather be with you than anywhere else; watching you keep your promise, continue to love him in life, to live with him. That was Heaven to Billy. You were his flickering light in the night sky, as he was yours, and you were going to keep each other’s lights going for as long as you could.
“I love you.” You said this aloud right as Billy whispered it in your ear, feeling immediate goosebumps forming along your skin and a tugging sensation in your heart. You felt it. Felt him.
“Billy?” You whispered, tears welling in your eyes as you sat up on your couch.
Billy touched your cheek, warm smile on his face. Your hand immediately raised to the same cheek, letting the tears fall as you rested your hand where his was. He was happy you felt him and you were even happier he was there.
Tagging: @takemepedropascal @speedmetalqueen @halefirewarrior
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