Existence

Schizophrenic // 25 // immortal

[ojahmoo]

Im schizophrenic in a dystopian land. I’m tired of seeing and fighting and warding off demons, tooth fairy goblins, working with fairies to keep me from dying, I just want to live in real life again. I love archangel Gabriel and Lucifer forever. They’ve helped and protected me so many times. I’ll win this fight. 5/24/26

[ojahmoo]

I am nothing but a squid in a dream.

[ojahmoo]

I take care of my schizophrenia by allowing me to be myself while also creating boundaries and making rules for myself on what im allowed to believe in and what I’m allowed to interact with. I only allow myself to interact with archangels.

It’s hard because sometimes the visions possess me and force me to acknowledge them. These visions are usually Greek gods and demons. Usually the Greek gods and demons want to rob me of my energy and my happiness or they just fall in love with me. Since I never know what to expect, I dont allow myself to believe in them or interact with them. Whether they’re real or not, they don’t seem to have a plan for me. Which is fine because me and God have a plan for me.

[babylamb1]

[cornbelt]

[fruitpunchdoll]

[ruraltears]

[song-for-an-unborn-sun]

[ruraltears]

[bratschool]

[perfectfeelings]

“‘You’re going to be happy’ said life ‘but first I’ll make you strong.’”

— Unknown

[violentwavesofemotion-deactivat]

Friedrich Nietzsche, from a brief note to Lou Andreas-Salomé wr. c. 1882

[quotefeeling]

“Sometimes the person who’s been there for everyone else needs someone to be there for them.”

— Unknown

[mournfulroses]

Franz Kafka, from a letter to Felice Bauer written in 1912, featured in Letters To Felice

[ojahmoo]

Berserk.

[ojahmoo]

IIIIII-

Never mind.

.-.

[ojahmoo]

I cant tell if I’m gaining more control or not at this point. The visions seems to be fading, as if they can become something to ignore…but at the same time they’re still controlling me and my outcome in this life. When will it end?