Matthew Butcher @okaymatthew - Tumblr Blog

“I lied. I’m not out of this relationship. I’m in. I’m so in, it’s humiliating because here I am begging. Ok here it is: Your choice, it’s simple: her or me. And I’m sure she’s really great… But Derek, I love you. In a really really big, pretend to like your taste in music, let your eat the last piece of cheese cake, hold a radio over my head outside your window! Unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me.”

— Meredith Grey

javarisx-fightingthosedemons

asvpfrenchy

Believe it.

iambrillyant

“your gut instinct is not a liar, those initial feelings exist for a reason, sit on them if you need to, process whether your feelings are valid or just projections, but never dismiss your intuition when the signs are staring you in the face and your nervous system is agreeing.”

— iambrillyant

libragoddess1993

How long they choose to love you will never be your decision.

libragoddess1993

How long they choose to love you will never be your decision.

neonsigsn

old-school-romantics

-Mia Hollow

becomingvecna

you.

look, i miss you. not only in the romantic way but in the way things were when things first started. i miss telling you everything right when it happened bc i wanted to share it w you. i miss how that was reciprocated. i miss waking up to your messages in the morning. i felt like you just threw it all away like i was nothing. i know you don’t want to talk about anything serious anymore but i wanted to get this off my chest. i love you, present tense, and you’re pushing me so far away from you. i just wish you could see why i did what i did. it wasn’t out of spite. it wasn’t a power move. it was the only way out that i could see. it broke me to abruptly end it because i knew that i was going to have no one in my corner. my heart was already smashed into pieces and by ending it on my end, i smashed it till there was nothing left. even after all of that, i still look outside my apartment window hoping that you’ll drive up and text me that you’re here. i look outside the gym windows just to get a glimpse of you even if it is only your car i’d see. it’s pathetic, i know. i just love you so fucking much that it kills me know that i broke your trust and your heart all in one night. i needed to let you go and the only way i could do that was if you let me go too. i’m sorry. how did we go from singing song in the car and laughing to not being involved at all. you made my whole world stop when you were here. i miss you and i love you but i know that’s not enough.

things are getting harder. lines are getting blurred. signals are getting mixed. i went into this trying to be one thing and all it took was four words for everything to come tumbling down again. how do you do that to me? how do you have that power? especially when i said “you mean absolutely nothing to me.” almost like you sensed it.

i know you’re fighting w/ some demons right now. i just wish you’d stop fighting me also. we both know how this ends so let’s just drop it and let’s just drop everything.

you will destroy me. unfortunately, there’s absolutely nothing i can do about it.