Writing it down

I'm not very good with people so I guess this is my way to try and get rid of some thoughts so my brain doesn't explode...

[oliveduchess247-blog]

I was bad...

I haven't taken my meds for two days I had to take them tonight or tomorrow I would have suffered 6am start in the morning ugh!

But weirdly over the couple of days I have felt okay... I took a hot showers done some housework and spoke to family. Although what I find when I'm without meds my brain can't just decide on one thing: it's like I can flick the TV before bed and fall asleep before I find something my brain can focus on for more than two or three minutes. I can sit and go I want to do something but not this... Brain doesn't think to inform me what it does want but has no quams about updating me with what it doesnt want. It can be super infuriating espicially when it comes to meal times I can sit and eat and my brain goes I don't want this. Am I just missing a piece of my brain that can only be replaced with meds??? #ihatetablets #whatsupbrain #makeupyourmind #anxietyjournal

[oliveduchess247-blog]

So excited to have received my @aboxofstories looks like 4 great books:in deep water by Sam Blake and the ice beneath her by Camilla Grebe both of which are thrillers which I am 'thrilled' about being my favourite genre next to murder mystery of course 🙌 also received happy days of the grump by Tuomas Kyro and the floating theatre by Martha Conway after reading the synopsis I am excited to dive in some of these are getting put at the top of the TBR 😍 #thrilledforthriller #hardbacks #paperbacks #booklove #cantwait #tbr https://www.instagram.com/p/B08LSIfnl2s/?igshid=1vut2rx487lcm

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Apologies for totally stealing this pic from fb but I'm in love with it... I also have it as my phone home and lockscreen #ravenclawpride #sorrynotsorry

[oliveduchess247-blog]

A picture from last autumn I really do live in one of the most beautiful countries in the world #biast #beautybeyondthedoorstep #edinburgh #throwbackthursday

[oliveduchess247-blog]

Making friends...

Was thinking today about how I made friends when I when I was younger because I did have friends before I moved. Most of the friends I made where made by me not talking to them and mostly talking to myself and they joined in... Instant BFF. NOT as easy when you are going on 24 and you cant even name your neighbours... I still talk to myself just no one is jumping into the conversations anymore #howtomakefriends #talkingtomyself #anxietyjournal

[oliveduchess247-blog]

Can't believe I am on Book Two of Carry On already why is this book so darn good😍 seriously like the 5th time I am reading it honestly one of my all time faves can't wait for Wayward Son to be released ❤️ #readingaddict #cantputitdown #Carryon #snowbaz

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If you were to chop everything that gives me pain... Totally buggered if I get a headache now #givemepeace #newbodyplease #cameraobscura https://www.instagram.com/p/B00_b-KH8mB/?igshid=1gh9vuv9rhupt

[oliveduchess247-blog]

Anti climax

Okay... So at work we always have these visits and I'm not a massive fan of visits which mostly consists of people walking around checking out your work asking questions etc they always say its nothing to worry about as long as you are doing your job I will say I'm good at my job just not a fan of getting stared at and being put on spot well totally psyched myself up for the biggest visit of the year and no such luck... Rescheduled... Typical glad I didn't double my meds or I would be a mess for nothing

#anticlimaxAF #anxietyjournal

[oliveduchess247-blog]

First post

So it's my first post... Hello

I'm not the best at making friends or talking to people but very good at talking to myself...

I work in a small team in a non customer facing role. I like people but I have too much anxiety to spend prolonged amount of time in busy areas. I could be in a room of 10 people and feel like I'm in a room of 100.

I love to read, watch movies, TV series and baking shows. I also love spending time with my partner (about the only person I can stomach at any given time) no matter the time or phase of the moon he brings me back to earth ❤️

So that was an introductory hello.

I may or may not continue to write down thoughts etc with my anxiety I have to write down my feelings triggers etc guess what better way than to not feel alone than to put them on the Internet.

Thanks for reading :)

#hellointernet #introducingme #anxietyjournal2.0