“funny tumblr page name”

how i think it would be like if they were real

[ominouslysallow]

*MC’s first day as a Hogwarts Student*

Sebastian: ‘First the beanie of truth tells you if you’re brave, kind, smart or doomed’

MC: ‘Right’

Sebastian: ‘Our headmaster is low key a fascist’

MC: ‘Oh?’

Sebastian: ‘We have lessons about how to talk to spirits but there’s ghosts everywhere anyway’

MC: ‘Noted’

Sebastian: ‘Our back garden is packed with trolls and wizards who’d murder kids no hesitation’

MC: ‘Huh? What-‘

Sebastian: ‘The Kraken is real and it eats our shit’

[ominouslysallow]

*some time during divination class*

Professor Onai: ‘Okay class, please take a look at your partner’s tea leaves and tell us what you see’

Gareth to MC: ‘I see what looks like…a throne? So could mean a great destiny or triumph?’

Ominis to Sebastian: ‘I can sense a house with no roof so there could be family troubles in the future’

Professor Onai: ‘Excellent work, Sebastian?’

Sebastian: ‘…’

Sebastian to Ominis: ‘I see a noseless, bald man’

[yasintheplottwist]

HL Characters as Vines

Because I saw @ominouslysallow do this and I’m nothing if not a bandwagon simp 🤡✨

SEB: Annie are you okay!? ARE YOU OKAY ANNIE?! (MC: 💃🏻🥁💥) ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY?! (MC: 💃🏻🥁💥) WILL YOU TELL US? (MC: 💃🏻🥁💥) IF YOU’RE OKAY!? MC: (after getting crucioed) Well. When Life gives you lemons—🍋😁 OMINIS: (@ SEB & MC) When will you learn!?! WHEN WILL YOU LEARN!?!? THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!! AAAAHHHHH— NATTY: (@ Rockwood+Harllow) Give me YO FUCKING MONEY!!! [LAW&ORDER Special Victims Unit] POPPY: Look at all those chickens! ROCKWOOD: (there's only one thing worse than a rapist...BOOM!) A child. (NO.) GARRETH: It is Wednesday my dudes. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ANNE: (Uh, you can't sit with us.) Actually, MEGAN, I can't sit anywhere! Because I have ✨haemorrhoids✨ DUNCAN: Ma! They're following me Ma! (Who? Who's following you?!) THE BUGS!!! LEANDER: What the FUCK is up, Kyle!!?? NO! What did you say? What the fuck, dude?! Step the fuck up, pal! THE KEEPERS: (@ MC) No off-topic questions. Because I don't want to. No there no. Permission denied. That's an off topic question. Next. You have been stopped. NIGELLUS BLACK: Cheese of TRUTH! 🧀 Immigrants. Cause. Cancer. SOLOMON: I mean, four female Ghostbusters? The feminists are taking over! 🎶I'M AN ADULT VIRGIN🎶

And finally... (SEB in driver's seat. OMINIS passenger. GARRETH gets in the back🎈) SEB: Are they Helium balloons??? OMINIS: Ah fer fucks sake!!! GARRETH: YEAH! 😡🎈 SEB: I told ya the cars not made for helium balloons!!! GARRETH: No— OMINIS: —THE FUCKING BALLOONS!!! SEB: Ah, its too late! We're flying away

[ominouslysallow]

*somewhere in the hills*

Ominis: What in MERLIN have I stood in?

Sebastian: Looks like diricawl shit

Ominis: *huffs* Do we have to be here? There’s poachers everywh- oh shit there they are!

Sebastian: Fuck run! Where’s MC? MC!

MC: *skipping through the forrest* A MERLIN TRIAL!

[ominouslysallow]

Sebastian: *leaving class* shit i forgot my-

Ominis: manners?

MC: standards?

Ominis: parents?

Sebastian: QUILL…gees

[ominouslysallow]

Hogwarts Legacy character’s as vines part 1:

MC: ‘Can i get a waffle? Can I PLEASE get a waffle?’

Sebastian: ‘I like that laugh…. HAU HAU HAU’

Ominis: ‘I wanna church girl that go to church, and read her bible’

Gareth: ‘January, February, March, April, May, June, JASON DERULO’

Natsai: *bring the beat in* ‘ANYTHING FOR YOU BEYONCE*

Poppy: ‘It’s an avocado! Thanks!’

Leander: ‘All i want to tell you is school’s not important, be whatever you want to be. If you want to be a dog.. WOOF, you know?’

Amit: *pans beautiful scenery* ‘Hi!’ ‘…okay’

[ominouslysallow]

Ominis: Don’t tell your mother🙂‍↔️

MC: Kiss one another😚

Sebastian: DIE FOR EACHOTHER🔫

Ominis: …..

MC: …..

[ominouslysallow]

hogwarts legacy character’s if they were they were put in different houses:

Sebastian: Ravenclaw

Ominis: Gryffindor

Gareth: Hufflepuff

Leander: Slytherin

Natsai: Hufflepuff

Poppy: Ravenclaw

Amit: Hufflepuff

[ominouslysallow]

hogwarts legacy characters as Taylor Swift songs part 1:

MC: Change (Fearless)

‘these walls that they put up to hold us back, fell down’

Sebastian: Anti-hero (Midnights)

‘i wake up screaming from dreaming, one day i’ll watch as you’re leaving cause you got tired of my scheming’

Ominis: Carolina (Where the Crawdads Sing)

‘lonesome i was born, lonesome i came, lonesome i’ll always stay’

Gareth: Dorothea (Evermore)

‘down in the park honey, making a lark of the misery’

Poppy: The Lakes (Folklore)

‘i’m not cut out for all these cynical clones, these hunters with cell phones’

Amit: Sweet Nothing (Midnights)

‘to you i can admit, that i’m just too soft for all of it’

Leander: Me! (Lover)

‘i never leave well enough alone, and troubles’ gonna follow where i go’

[ominouslysallow]

how i think hogwarts legacy character’s would react if chosen for the tri-wizard tournament:

MC: *sweats* does one of the rounds involve buying a shop?

Sebastian: seriously?! i just perfected my quiff

Ominis: i am honoured to receive this however as Sebastian’s support person, i must decline

Gareth: *googles how to use nepotism to get out of things*

Poppy: *probably ends up taming a dragon and winning*

Amit: can i bring my telescope?

Leander: *cries and throws up everywhere*

[ominouslysallow]

Sebastian: what do you call a fish wearing a bow tie?

Ominis: don’t be absurd - they don’t have necks so a bow tie wouldn’t even stay put! you talk absolute nonsense sometimes

MC: …

Sebastian: sofishticated

[ominouslysallow]

hogwarts legacy character’s pick up lines part 1:

Sebastian: are you from tennessee? bc i’m so gosh darn lonely pls love me

Ominis: some say love is blind, i say just because i’m blind doesn’t mean you get to be ugly ;)

Gareth: hey girl you dropped something! looks like your standards

Amit: i don’t need a telescope to see THAT ASS

Leander: *has no game for shit*

BONUS! Jackdaw: call me an undertaker bc i’m ready to get my hands dirty digging

[ominouslysallow]

Sebastian: what do you call a fish wearing a bow tie?

Ominis: don’t be absurd - they don’t have necks so a bow tie wouldn’t even stay put! you talk absolute nonsense sometimes

MC: …

Sebastian: sofishticated

[ominouslysallow]

hogwarts legacy characters as tiktok comments part 2:

Sebastian: flash sale! my clothes are 100% off!

Ominis: first of my bloodline to read this

Gareth: is this a sign to start gambling?

Amit: weird way of proposing but yes

Leander: *any ‘ho is you-‘ comment*

Poppy: you’re funny pls don’t go bald

MC EDITION: you could’ve kissed the brick first

[ominouslysallow]

MC: i need gym motivation

MC: *sticks head in memory pensieve*

Memory of Sebastian: hOw COulD i bE fRiENds wItH sOmEoNE sO igNoRAnt

MC: yep that’ll do it

[ominouslysallow]

hogwarts legacy characters as tiktok comments (part 1):

Sebastian: do you do funerals?

Ominis: mind you, this is my first impression of you…

Gareth: must’ve been the wind-

Poppy: on MY cellular device?

Leander: first time nervous, kinda commenting

Amit: i’m telling my kids this was real

[ominouslysallow]

Sebastian: *upset* i just feel like i’m disappointing everyone - i’m just constantly angry and annoyed at everything

Ominis: it’s okay sebastian, you can’t help the way you have been treated, right MC?

MC: it’s giving uncle-issues