HER FREEDOM & INNOCENCE HAS BROUGHT THIS WHOLE THING DOWN … alice cullen brandon. heavily meta & divergent. by nosta.

oozey mess
noise dept.
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
NASA
trying on a metaphor

if i look back, i am lost

Kiana Khansmith
Not today Justin
No title available
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
KIROKAZE
Show & Tell
Misplaced Lens Cap
sheepfilms
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Mike Driver
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

Andulka
🪼
wallacepolsom
seen from United States

seen from Brazil
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seen from United States
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seen from Australia
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seen from United States
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seen from Mexico
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@oraclesse
HER FREEDOM & INNOCENCE HAS BROUGHT THIS WHOLE THING DOWN … alice cullen brandon. heavily meta & divergent. by nosta.
STOP THE PRESS: alice is so pisces coded i'm
“ i cannot see on command... it doesn’t work like that.”
sitting on each side of the booth, they exchange glances ( a glare from @nikl3us, a curious, rapid blinking of the eyes from her ), she can tell his patience is wearing thin – through the century, she’s gotten better at reading basic emotions, figuring out what they mean on other people. She doesn’t feel as out of place, but she does tend to mimic others’ behavior when she experiences overwhelm, which is why her arms mirror his’, crossed over her chest, and her posture is rigid like a statue. Klaus Mikaelson presents himself like someone who ought to be feared, and he is. The vision of splattering blood on a white wall and trembling shrieks that left her shaking on the ground before meeting him officially testifies to that.
She does not wish to ever have to endure a torturing vision about him again.
“ and if it did, i would still not tell you anything. you seek to harm whoever you’re tracking… i don’t want to be a part of that, ” she can still smell the blood on his hands ( not so much on his breath, unlike some vampires, it’s like he kills for entirely different purposes other than feeding ) “ and this place… i can’t see anything here. It’s like … a mantle, you know? a shadowy mantle over mystic falls. it there is anything to see, i can’t see it.” maybe that’s why she’s begged Jasper to stay longer, maybe she’d stay forever if it means not seeing ever again.
i have like 5 of u here but starter call !!
it's so stupid that smeyer says the cullens only have degrees in very specific fields each... like they are immortal, they obviously have tried and graduated from every career they fancied or thought sounded cool
alice was turned at age 24, ok, in the winter of 1925
jasper having to teach alice how to feel in determinate situations immediately after they meet because she does not quite remember/know how to be human any longer!! jas helping alice understand how different feelings and emotions feel like with his empathic manipulation. no, he does NOT change her moods to keep her perpetually cheery as smeyer said, he simply helps her handle them until she gets the grasp of it herself.
high cotoure expensive shit? no thanks, alice is a thrift shop girlie thru and thru, loves vintage clothing and unique funky pieces. fight me on this to the grave.
i care way too much about fixing smeyer's historical/medical inaccuracies, i need a life
okay, as someone who has seen ( not experienced, but seen ) the effects of ECT firsthand, i can confidently say, along with my research on the matter, that smeyer is yet again full of shit, because while the supposedly therapeutic effects of ECT are based on the patient suffering temporary memory loss to alleviate the trauma/depression, it is not likely that, even in the time period alice was at the ward, it would have erased all her memories of her human life. i meta, therefore, that her forgetting her human memories was done by compulsion by the vampire who turned her, the one who worked at the psychiatric ward. yes, the prolonged ECT sessions fucked with her brain quite a lot, and they made her memory quite foggy at the time of her transformation, as it happened immediately after her nightly session, BUT erassing her entire memory file of human life was done via vampiric compulsion.
----------- alice’s visions
she suffered from epil.epsy as a human, which, according to a study done in Helsinki between 1947 and 1990:
There was strong evidence of clustering of the association between epilepsy and psychosis within families. Individuals with a parental history of epilepsy had a 2-fold increase in the risk of developing psychosis, compared with individuals without a parental history of epilepsy. Individuals with a parental history of psychosis had, reciprocally, a 2.7-fold increase in the risk of having a diagnosis of generalized epilepsy, compared with individuals without a parental history of psychosis.
this is the reason why alice was hospitalized ( as well as her stepmother using it as an excuse to get rid of her ). also, alice’s epileptic episodes in her human youth reached a point where her religious father sought a pñriest to perform an exorcism on her, believing her possessed. this was denied by the local church, so her stepmother, a young nurse, convinced her father to send her to a psychiatric ward.
how does this relate to her visions? Alice never had visions of the future as a human, they were hallucinations caused by recurring psychotic outbreaks, as:
Another serious and typical symptoms of psychotic outbreaks are perceptual disorders, commonly referred to as hallucinations. Hallucinations are alterations in which the person begins to perceive unrealistic stimuli or that are not present.
however, this did, as a vampire, become a psychic gift and ability to see the future events. alice has no control over her visions, and they are cryptic and often vague and terryfing in nature, as they manifest very much like a perceptual disorder. this, accomapnied by the fact that she suffers from convulsions every time she has a vision, has made alice terrified of her gift.
📚   JEREMY P. BUSHNELL’S THE INSIDES ( 2016 ) STARTERS.       ↳ change pronouns / wording as necessary.
❛ leave us the fuck alone. ❜ ❛ what would you say, if i told you that using nothing more than the items in this room, you could get anything you wanted? ❜ ❛ i’d say you were a fucking liar. ❜ ❛ you don’t look like someone who has everything he wants. ❜ ❛ don’t tell me the answer. but think about it. ❜ ❛ i’m not twisting your arm. ❜ ❛ you can just walk out of here and go back to whatever you were doing before i came along. ❜ ❛ i need you to think about the possible consequences. ❜ ❛ what’s the worst that could happen? ❜ ❛ you were always supposed to be the cynical one. ❜ ❛ mellowing out in your old age, are you then? ❜ ❛ so how do we begin? ❜ ❛ what else can you tell me about them? ❜ ❛ they were stolen. ❜ ❛ i am impressed by your demonstration. ❜ ❛ then i suppose all that remains is the transactional part of our conversation? ❜ ❛ i never want to see you again, don’t come back here. ❜ ❛ you’re not free of that place. you left a part of yourself behind. ❜ ❛ you don’t need to want more. you don’t need to want anything at all. ❜ ❛ i thought you delighted in cruelty. ❜ ❛ my sweet, what are you thinking about? ❜ ❛ i’m thinking about a knife. ❜ ❛ well these people seem totally terrible. ❜ ❛ i’m not scared, not of these people. ❜ ❛ all we have to do is put up with them until the thing is done. ❜ ❛ let me see your knife. ❜ ❛ see with your eyes, not with your hands. ❜ ❛ it’s you. you did this. you stepped away and everything broke. ❜ ❛ you fuck. turn around and look at me. ❜ ❛ well, i don’t know. you’re the expert, you tell me. ❜ ❛ i’m working on something in here. it’s a surprise. ❜ ❛ do whatever you’re doing. i have to make a phone call. ❜ ❛ now, tell me again, what happened? ❜ ❛ the situation is under control. ❜ ❛ not everyone wants to feel better all the time. ❜ ❛ tell me what bothers you the most. ❜ ❛ i’m sorry i’m being an asshole. i just don’t know what to do. ❜ ❛ anything can be magic. ❜ ❛ what makes you so sure we’re not crazy. ❜ ❛ you ever think that our first response to this thing shouldn’t just be kill it? ❜ ❛ fine, you want me to say i was wrong? would that gratify you? ❜ ❛ it seems like maybe that’s dangerous. ❜ ❛ put down the gun, and get in the car. ❜ ❛ just — just tell me you’re going to be safe. ❜ ❛ you need to remember that i’m actually good at this. ❜ ❛ i think there’s a different way to handle this. ❜ ❛ you should give yourself a break from it more often. ❜ ❛ no i’m not up for an adventure. we’ve had too many adventures already. ❜ ❛ what does that mean? that doesn’t mean anything. ❜ ❛ i think you have the wrong idea about why i’m here. ❜ ❛ come down the basement with me and we’ll talk. ❜ ❛ come closer, you fuck. ❜ ❛ don’t fucking look at me. ❜ ❛ it is not regrettable to kill people, it’s wrong. ❜ ❛ i don’t know. i don’t think i’m safe. ❜