majestic flightless turd

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[orbsteeb]

dig through the witches

and burn through the witches

and slam in the back of my, witches

[orbsteeb]

kids from the 90s will remember this: witeout ™. the white thing children used to destroy their mistakes. you smeared it on your sin with the convenient brush and presto! your error is ahid from shaming eyes, and you can almost write on the rubbery residue.

fact one: witeout corp ™ burned to the ground after i asked the CEO if he had ever “heard of the backspace key, such is on your average keyboard. gramps” and he burst into flames

fact two: the technical term for the whiteout potion is “corrective fluid” which is the oldest series of words ive ever read. its something scrooge would demand from oliver twist

[plaidcushion]

In new zealand instead of whiteout it was called twink

Fun nz fact for you there

[nonbinaryfairygodparent-deactiv]

they banned whiteout at my middle school because kids were huffing it apparently

we all had to buy those eraseable pens they sold way back when, and which were so shitty, because for language arts class you HAD to write in pen and in cursive

ah yes…the very early 2000s….great times

[hellaweasels]

ahaha i remember thaaaat. my mom was so pissed when she found out they banned it

[orbsteeb]

folks i am a banned and huffy twink

[orbsteeb]

lemme just slip into something more comfortable *slides gently into an open grave*

[i-was-so-alone-and-iou-so-much]

Is this an episode of Supernatural?

[orbsteeb]

i don’t think so, but let me check *steps behind the couch and mimes walking down a fligth of stairs*

[orbsteeb]

wait did i miss something? are you and eliza dating? bc you two look really cool together.

i never answered this ask but think about it roughly 1 time/month 

[orbsteeb]

duchess: [distastefully now] ah.

[orbsteeb]

the funiest youtube videos are the ones where some dipshit gets grounded 

edit: funnyest 

edit edit: funnest 

edit edit edit: first of all, im NOT melting down. you fuckers

[orbsteeb]

duke: oh, the famous mirth man of old, orbsteeb, is posting jokes again

duchess: ah! hand me the opera glasses, darling. wonderful

[orbsteeb]

kids from the 90s will remember this: witeout (tm). the white thing children used to destroy their mistakes. you smeared it on your sin with the convenient brush and presto! your error is ahid from shaming eyes, and you can almost write on the rubbery residue.

fact one: witeout corp (tm) burned to the ground after i asked the CEO if he had ever “heard of the backspace key, such is on your average keyboard. gramps” and he burst into flames

fact two: the technical term for the whiteout potion is “corrective fluid” which is the oldest series of words ive ever read. its something scrooge would demand from oliver twist

[orbsteeb]

wehn my son was born a good witch gave him 3 benisons, which are hugeness, loudness, and a special saddle so i can ride him around while he repeats everything i say more hugely

[orbsteeb]

Yo not trying to be an ass or anything but Heineken is a Dutch brand, not German!

How Could This Matter

[nicolae-carpathia]

things steeb can’t do 1) measure horses 2) tell dutch things from german things

[orbsteeb]

as far as i can tell the difference between dutch and deutsch is 1) heinekan is a really bad beer and 2) how large is yonder horse. i can’t tell. bring me my eyeglass.  

[nicolae-carpathia]

steeb smokes some weed and says “pass the germany pon the left hand side”, later he estimates the height of a bong as 1.2 horses

[orbsteeb]

[regards bong highly due to weed smoke] this glass is an acceptable number of horses tall. less than one, at least

[orbsteeb]

Yo not trying to be an ass or anything but Heineken is a Dutch brand, not German!

How Could This Matter

[nicolae-carpathia]

things steeb can’t do 1) measure horses 2) tell dutch things from german things

[orbsteeb]

as far as i can tell the difference between dutch and deutsch is 1) heinekan is a really bad beer and 2) how large is yonder horse. i can’t tell. bring me my eyeglass.  

[orbsteeb]

Yo not trying to be an ass or anything but Heineken is a Dutch brand, not German!

How Could This Matter

[orbsteeb]

This is pure schmaltz but my fave food when I was little was my chef dad's mushroom sauce, part of why I loved it was we'd cook it together, he ensured I could make it. He died when I was 8 but I can still make his mushroom sauce&it's still delicious

that is lovely. 

[orbsteeb]

you are bringing me so much joy during these hellish days.

yang

[orbsteeb]

You must lead quite the miserable life to spend your time bullying people online. Has your mind not matured past the age of 16? Take some of all this time you have and work on growing up. Learn how to be civil, you're embarrassing yourself.

yin

[orbsteeb]

red alert: that writer dude is now defending the men/women wage gap and also, yelling to the heavens that the tampon tax isn't a big deal and period-havers are whiny babies despite never having menstruated in his life

of course he is

[orbsteeb]

Your writing is garbage what makes you think you have any authority on it? lmao

alright cool dude. tell me about your favorite food and why it matters.