Oscar

she/her, I read books

[oscarbewildered]

किसे चाहिए मन का सोना, आँख की मोती?

किसे पड़ी है, अंदर क्या है?

[oscarbewildered]

It's April 30th, I don't know if you remember but it was the first time I saw you, met you and immediately fell in love with you... last year. I still love you though, I still remember the first thing I said to you, what you replied to me, what you wore, you had this welcomingaura and god awful the most gorgeous smile I'dever witnessed. I was enchanted to meet you, literally. I think I'm going to remember this date for a long time, I pray that you remember it too <3. I miss you and love you so much my Sunflower🌻🌙

[oscarbewildered]

On every blown out candle

            that tops my birthday cake,

On every penny in a fountain

            that makes the water shake,

On every last eyelash

            that I blow off of my finger,

On every shooting star

            that never seems to linger,

On repeating numbers on my clock

            that spell out special times,

On the dandelion fuzz

            that blows throughout the sky,

On every broken wishbone

            when I win that silly game,

My wish will never waver-

            I’ll always say your name.

[oscarbewildered]

I am a bit serious person but when there's a really really reallyyy stupid song stuck in my head, I make sure I make the absolute fool out of myself.. how do I do it? I do my lil dancey dance. Sometimes you have to let go and do your lil dancey dance. Embarrass yourself, go crazy, let them judge! (Today the song was Single ladies by Beyoncé in case you were wondering).

[catchymemes]

[oscarbewildered]

You might be anything to him, but I'm the reason he'll always smile when he listens to his fav song Moonlight🌙🌻

[oscarbewildered]

I feel too much, or I have been feeling too much... that'd be more accurate i guess. I have generally not been the type of person to cry about anything (even the major ones), but these past few months, I've become a competition to Elena Gilbert. I think it's okay to express it all let it out sometimes in a while, helps keeping people around you alive.

[thedankmemes]

[oscarbewildered]

Wake up babe, it's +1 day!!

[oscarbewildered]

Whatever you do, just don't break someone's heart...

[ethereal-muses]

The intimacy of sharing feelings and thoughts that were buried deep inside with someone who understands and listens to them patiently and acknowledges them and does not make you feel like you're too much is everything.

[oscarbewildered]

Tamasha, a truly overlooked Bollywood masterpiece, whenever I recall this film, there's a specific song that never fails to send shivers down my spine "Agar tum saath ho". It’s a song for everyone- the ones who believe in love, the ones who don’t and the ones who are trying. For even the ones who have won in love knows what it is to lose. The song narrates the timeless struggle between the heart and the mind. Tara, dressed in deep red tones, driven by her heart. Ved, in lighter beige attire, is driven by his brain.

In this moment, Tara tightly hugs Ved, as if pleading silently for him to stay. The way in which she holds him carries an emotional weight adding a layer of emotion and urgency to the scene, suggesting that words may not be enough to convey what she feels, and her actions speak volumes in seeking his presence. She's scared to lose him, and she feels like the relationship is ending. Thus, holding on to him as tight as possible.

But Ved reluctantly pushes her away releasing himself from the hug. We can see the tears in his eyes. He seems to be struggling with inner conflicts, caught between what he wants and what makes sense.

In a quiet moment, Tara and Ved rest their heads on the table. Gently stroking his head, as if trying to nudge his brain to fall in love with her. "Agar tum saath ho". But the brain is stubborn and determined, it is not ready to listen. It is practical. Ved looks away while they rest their heads on the table, he's hiding tears and feeling exposed and vulnerable. *Ved leaves*, "Bedard thi zindagi, bedard hai". Life was merciless, it is merciless, even if he stays with her. It does not make a difference.

"Mujhe lagta hai ki baatein dil ki, hoti lafzon ki dhokhebaazi". It's like realizing that sometimes words aren't enough to express the depth of what your heart truly wants, what you truly feel for each other. Love is a relationship in which one converses through shared silences, we see that here once again in the deep silence of Tara and Ved.🌻🌙

[oscarbewildered]

Writing is sometimes scary because what if you write something which wasn't meant for the world to see, to see your deepest thoughts, to know about your darkest fear, because if i write I'll know it's true and I'll know nobody cares and it'll make me wanna do things I fear...

[oscarbewildered]

Stare at the ceiling, the clock's ticking it's 2am. In a sea of faces, I stand alone, amid the chatter, my voice is but a distant tone. People like shadows, fading into the air, Invisible, I wander, burdened by the weight I bear.

[oscarbewildered]

The whole circle of Janardhan starting as an uncredited singer ready to get his heartbroken so he could become like his idol and ending with Jordan having everything in life yet dying in itch for his one true love Heer, wanting to give away everything he had just so his heart doesn't get broken. It brought out the dark side of fame and the scary realities of human connection.

[oscarbewildered]

I try to act, cool, calm and mysterious then someone brings up one of my favourite authors or books and i have to pretend I'm not insane.

[leavethesuninthesky]

folklore is for the girls who can't bring themselves to close the last page of a book. for the girls who hate the cold but love the feeling of snowflakes upon eyelashes. who wear sweaters to cover up their aching, who notice every single little detail, who sit in solitude and silence and observe their loved ones. for academic validation girls who love the moon. for girls scared to get drunk, because of the fear that they will lose everything if they lose themselves.for the oldest sisters. girls with not a lot of friends but the ones they do have are considered family, who appreciate the little things, who tell their mothers everything. girls who love their families with their entire soul and just want their grandparents to be proud of them, and know that they are loved. girls who are 'mature for their age' but miss growing up, who sneak stolen glances and feel like second chances, girls who feel forgettable and retreat into themselves wondering if anyone will care. girls with quiet voices, who don't know how to dance, who worry over everything. for the introverts. for the ones who long to be understood with their whole hearts so much it hurts. girls who hope to recieve a love letter at least once in their life. girls who like rain. girls who want to say i love you but the words get caught in their throats. girls who forget about their stuffed animals for a month or so and then hold them tight while sleeping to apologize. the girls who don't know if they're an augustine or a betty, who love and love with all their hearts but end up brushed aside, wrists broken and bruised from fighting their feelings. girls like me.