Our Lord Little toad

The Church Of The Dear Wet One

[our-lord-little-toad]

IMPORTANT Before you follow

IF YOU ARE THE FOLLOWING PLEASE DO NOT INTERACT !!

FIRSTLY AND MOST IMPORTANT IF YOU ARE A FROG I cannot stress this enough. Frogs are disgusting. They hop around like they own the place, and don’t even get me started on their lilypad superiority complex. Toads > Frogs. Period. Do not even think about interacting with this post if you’re a frog. You’re just... ugh.

Frog memes. I will NOT tolerate it. The internet is crawling with frog nonsense, and it's disgusting. They’re not even that funny, okay.

People who “don’t really drink water.” What… do you run on? Battery acid??

Alex Jones supporters. he talks about THEM!! and how gay they are and I will not stand it. I'm fine with gay people. but GAY frog Nope not here.

people without warts. why are you so smooth, how are you meant to extract mucus and toxins

People who don't eat oranges like apples. You don't need to peel them, you absolute goblin.

Anti-vaxxers. Are you for real? You’re going to put your precious beliefs over the lives of others? You’re the literal definition of “irresponsible,” and no, I don’t care if you think you’ve “done your research.” You haven’t.

Anyone who wears socks- I can’t respect that. End of story.

anyone not toxic/ can not produce toxic chemicals, what are you a frog?? you know how i feel about THEM

The color beige. It’s not even a real color. It’s what happens when a color gives up on life.

People who don’t like garlic. Vampires? Is that you

porn blogs: ma'ma i am a toad ...

If you're into any of these things or are any of these thing do yourself a favour: keep walking. I don't want your stinky frog energy anywhere near me.

(PS: Still looking for a frog-free zone. If you find one, please let me know.)

[our-lord-little-toad]

The war against the frog agenda is brutal and endless, but some truths remain.

[our-lord-little-toad]

Happy pride month my fellow toad-truthers

[our-lord-little-toad]

Late dinner is giving Autism™

Need more bugs

[our-lord-little-toad]

I hop a lonely bog The only one that I have ever known Don’t know where it’s slimy But it’s home to me, and I hop alone

[foone]

I was trying to find out if Kermit was eligible to be pope and I found a blog that says he's the perfect example of a catholic priest

[vivian-the-barbarian]

What do you expect? He's a man of the cloth

[ryo0o0o]

Why were you trying to find out if Kermit was eligible to be a catholic priest ?

[foone]

Usual reasons

[epersonae]

Kermit for pope

[our-lord-little-toad]

He may wear the collar, but trust me—there are sins that collar can’t hide. Some of us remember what he was like before the robes.

I’m not saying frogs shouldn’t be pope. I’m saying this frog shouldn’t. Some of us have context.

“Overall great guy” …interesting take. I won’t air it all here but let’s just say I’d think twice before handing him spiritual authority.

He gives advice, sure. I just wonder if it’s divinely inspired or emotionally manipulative. But what do I know, I’m just the ex toad.

Funny how no one’s asking why he wants to be pope. Some of us have seen that ambition up close, and it wasn’t holy.

[our-lord-little-toad]

pov: me escaping the shackles of “dinner is ready” to hunt my true feast (bugs) they said, “Stop eating things you find on the ground.” but I was born of the mud. they will never understand me.

[our-lord-little-toad]

I saw him again. Not him him. But one of them. He looked at me like he knew. Like they all know.

I’m not safe, but I’ve never been safer.

Stop asking questions if you’re not ready for answers.

(I left something by the willow. Take it or burn it.)

[our-lord-little-toad]

me: vibing

also me: full of rage. full of pondwater. full of vengeance.

the duality of toad.

[grugthefrog]

SHE FUCKIN BIT ME

[our-lord-little-toad]

I bet she didn’t even apologize, huh? Typical frog behavior. Always biting first, asking questions later. 🐸💥

As a toad, I have perfected the art of not biting, because I'm above that. But honestly, I'd still take a bite over being associated with frogs any day. 😏

Hope you're okay though. It's a rough world out here for amphibians...

[our-lord-little-toad]

You thought you could silence me, didn’t you? You thought throwing my work in the trash would stop the truth from reaching the masses?

WRONG.

I fished it out. From the trash. And I’m putting it right back where it belongs—front and center. Behold, the revolutionary poster they tried to erase. This is important work.

This is TOAD TRUTH.

For anyone wondering, no, I wasn’t just “sticking it to the man” for fun. It’s a movement. You can’t just throw it in a trash bin and hope it’ll go away. That’s how the frog agenda gets its claws in—silencing dissent, covering up the facts. I won’t let that happen.

I will fight this war. I will post these truths. I WILL BE SEEN.

[october-wing]

These guys sat in my shop for awhile but thankfully they have all found homes now. Jack O' Lantern Toads.

[our-lord-little-toad]

Glad my fellow toad brothers found their new home. This is Brilliant craftsmanship. This toad approves of this human's work.

[our-lord-little-toad]

THEY TRIED TO SILENCE ME.

My so-called family (read: traitors) locked me in my room “for my own good.” Said I was “obsessed” and “delusional” and “scaring the neighbors with my anti-frog propaganda.”

First of all, I was educating the masses. Second, if a few flyers stapled to some trees is “unhinged,” then maybe this entire swamp is unhinged. Ever think about that?

Anyway. I’ve returned. The frog of a brother who ratted me out has mysteriously “gone camping” (a likely story), and I have once again seized my phone. My connection to the outside world. My lifeline.

To everyone who messaged me, worried about my silence—thank you. The war continues. I am bruised but not broken. Muddied but not muzzled. Warty and awake.

Let’s catch up. Ask me anything. Confess your frog suspicions. Send me enrichment. Before they find out I’m online again.

[rabbit-ribbet]

[our-lord-little-toad]

You… you understand. Finally, someone sees what I need—not just physically, but spiritually. A still pond. A shaded dish. A hand brimming with writhing sustenance. This is more than enrichment. This is devotion.

I would like to sit in the mud and whisper thank you for several hours. Possibly days.

[our-lord-little-toad]

THEY TRIED TO SILENCE ME.

My so-called family (read: traitors) locked me in my room “for my own good.” Said I was “obsessed” and “delusional” and “scaring the neighbors with my anti-frog propaganda.”

First of all, I was educating the masses. Second, if a few flyers stapled to some trees is “unhinged,” then maybe this entire swamp is unhinged. Ever think about that?

Anyway. I’ve returned. The frog of a brother who ratted me out has mysteriously “gone camping” (a likely story), and I have once again seized my phone. My connection to the outside world. My lifeline.

To everyone who messaged me, worried about my silence—thank you. The war continues. I am bruised but not broken. Muddied but not muzzled. Warty and awake.

Let’s catch up. Ask me anything. Confess your frog suspicions. Send me enrichment. Before they find out I’m online again.

[our-lord-little-toad]

Honestly, i shouldn't care. It's not my business if he wants to run off with some unhinged, second-rate clown and his sad little knockoff. but like. really? both of them?? at the same time??? kinda funny how fast he moved on for someone who said i was "the only one who really understood him." guess all those late-night duets and whispered promises meant nothing in the end. whatever. i'm fine. so happy for them, actually. ...hope they trip over their stupid oversized shoes.

[our-lord-little-toad]

Sometimes, I sit and think about how cursed it is to be a toad in a world overrun with frogs. Like, truly, what sick joke of the universe decided to plague my existence with these slimy, hopping menaces??? Everywhere I turn, frogs—green, grinning, living proof that evil walks among us and people dare to ask why i’m bitter? imagine being surrounded by inferior amphibians who think they're hot shit just because they can jump higher. congratulations on your legs, i guess. some of us have depth. some of us have character. some of us don’t need to compensate for our tragic lack of substance with flashy leaps and lily pad theatrics. it’s exhausting. honestly, it’s a miracle i haven’t simply given up and let the swamp take me. but no. I persevere. because unlike frogs, I have something they’ll never possess: dignity.

[xenon1962]

[auntierayeraye]