You were in your room looking at a picture that popped up in your “On This Day” feature of Facebook. It was of you and Ricky sitting on the floor in front of a mirror at his sister’s house. It was one of those pictures that brought you back to that moment. You were flooded with emotions.
You remembered walking through the door with him, the air was cold, but something about it felt like home somehow. You remembered that you left your scarf at his sister’s house and it was probably still on one of his drawers even now.
“I saw this photo of us today. It reminded me of everything. When we were singing in the car, getting lost upstate. The autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place. I can picture it after all these days. I know it's long gone,
and that magic's not here no more, and I might be okay, but I'm not fine at all.” You start writing in a text to Ricky. You were with Ricky for about eight months before he broke up with you.
“The time you almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over at me. Wind in my hair, I was there, I remember it all too well. I remember going into your sister’s house and how she had a photo album on the counter, your cheeks were turning red. You were so embarrassed by the pictures from your childhood. The one with you with glasses in a twin sized bed or the one with you on your t-ball team. You taught me about your past, thinking your future was me.” You continue in the message.
”I know it's long gone and there was nothing else I could do and I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to...” You continue to write. The words to describe your relationship with Ricky came so easily.
"There we are again in the middle of the night. We're dancing around the kitchen in the refrigerator light down the stairs, I was there, I remember it all too well. Well, maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much, but maybe this thing was a masterpiece until you tore it all up.” You finish.
“You call me up again just to break me like a promise. So casually cruel in the name of being honest. I'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here because I remember it all, all, all... too well.” You say this part out loud to yourself and to the picture of Ricky. You were remembering why you needed to forget him. You were remembering all of the hurt.
“Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it. I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it. After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own now you mail back my things and I walk home alone. But you keep my old scarf from that very first week because I imagine it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me. You can't get rid of it because you remember it all too well.” You are full on crying now sitting on the floor of your room talking to yourself holding your phone in one hand.
”Here we are again, when I loved you so. Back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known. It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well.” You say as you delete the message.
vaporwave
janainaart
kaledo-art
romaincrisis
izzy806
jacobvanloon
dededos
