JeanMarco is My Essence

AO3 is OverMyFreckledBody // used to be a jeanmarco blog now i just throw my writing here Sidebar Image by @leamonadefreak Header by @juliannadraws based on my deer AU Corner Image by @arierruu Top bar icons by: @bismutsnowflakes @hello-aceofspace @vanitas--vanilla

[overmyfreckledbody]

rarely spoken of downside of blocking everyone so liberally on this site is that when your buddy sends you a post that's "no longer available" you have to figure which motherfucker you blocked for some stupid reason like shipping your notp 3 years ago

[overmyfreckledbody]

it's a little horrible sometimes, when you're reading something grief-focused, and you really connect to it, and then climax of the healing happens in it the opposite of what you were expecting. and you get that sick feeling, that nasty little twinge in your stomach that's not loss over again but it's smaller. like when you realize something has changed and you can't go back. it's icky, and shocking. but it's just not how you'd heal, so it's like? maybe skin growing in backwards.

[overmyfreckledbody]

like my friend lost their dad and then not long after, we both play bg3. and we talked about the revival wand quest. I gave the woman the wand, my friend snapped it. they talked about healing and health and how the idea of just keeping it made them sick

and I just thought to myself, well, you didn't love your dad like I loved my brother. there's no way I wouldn't have kept that wand. having him at all, twisted and wrong, was better than not having him at all.

but I didn't say that. and it wasn't like they were wrong or I was either. we just heal different. it still made us both sick to talk about it though

[overmyfreckledbody]

it's a little horrible sometimes, when you're reading something grief-focused, and you really connect to it, and then climax of the healing happens in it the opposite of what you were expecting. and you get that sick feeling, that nasty little twinge in your stomach that's not loss over again but it's smaller. like when you realize something has changed and you can't go back. it's icky, and shocking. but it's just not how you'd heal, so it's like? maybe skin growing in backwards.

[overmyfreckledbody]

Hey babe👋, are you doing well? I hope you are🫶. I thought about you and your writing way to much for a while after we last talked😅. I'm still stupidly Obsessed with *Them*, Anyway, oh also just thought I should ask, are you still in the dsmp fandom?

Love ya -🌮😺

Oh hey! I was actually just thinking of you recently (probably with how I see you again on the dash, hahaha). I know I kinda dropped out of communication- and likely will... again. But I was thinking of you, too!

Putting this under a read more cuz it got slightly longer and a touch personal (while vague).

Things have been going....not great, not fun. Said things have added to me being shit at replying to messages but - I wanted to thank you for reaching out even after my silence and get back to you sooner. And I'm sorry, too, for that. I'm bad at keeping up (ask any other friend of mine! they'd know too!), and with my returning depression, it's also been harder. I find it hard to get out of bed to eat, and have been spending pretty much any free time I had on playing Sun Haven instead just to keep myself busy. Happy of a sort.

I still haven't written anything since we last spoke, BUT ... the timing on this is impeccable. For the past three days I have been thinking of this, like, not!fic? That I've had a plot bunny for, for years now. But it's come back to me and I keep pretending to think about writing it. Very nothingness, small ass fic just where a modern!au Dream is very Gross (LMFAO). Similar to him in the first bowspam post I ever wrote, where he jerks off to Tom in a very weird ass way. We come (lol) full circle. kinda inspired by another (thor.ki) fic but only like a snippet of that one. I'd love to write it one day, if for no one else but my own amusement, and you, of course. :)

So, I would say I still think about the dsmp, yeah. I don't read much of it or seek it out, but I still like it and probably will have moments of returning as I do with all things I've loved. Like, every few months I get kicked in the face with grief again and go find some beeduo posts to project onto. And I do WANT to write the bowspam I've come up with. I just... haven't written anything.

This is rambling and long. But I am touched that you thought of me and my writing. I think of our conversations too and the fics you recced! I still want to go back and read more of those. I need to reply to comments again too. (so since I have very little to give right now, I hope this big ass wall of text is something to chew on for a minute.) But I have to say I'm the same! Also obsessed. Nobody does it like them, I compare them to stuff I love and new things I see and it's never the same. God. They fucked me up good, the bastards.

I hope you're doing well! Better than I am, at least? Do tell me!! I've missed you and I'm sorry again. Thank you again as well for reaching out. It's been lovely to see you get up to things again. 💖💖

[overmyfreckledbody]

AND THEN I ACTUALLY FUCKING DID IT!!!

thank you again taco cat!!!! I only actually wrote for the first time again in sooosoosoodoosooso long bc of the post I tagged that on, and YOU. that fic is for you :)

[overmyfreckledbody]

Hey babe👋, are you doing well? I hope you are🫶. I thought about you and your writing way to much for a while after we last talked😅. I'm still stupidly Obsessed with *Them*, Anyway, oh also just thought I should ask, are you still in the dsmp fandom?

Love ya -🌮😺

Oh hey! I was actually just thinking of you recently (probably with how I see you again on the dash, hahaha). I know I kinda dropped out of communication- and likely will... again. But I was thinking of you, too!

Putting this under a read more cuz it got slightly longer and a touch personal (while vague).

Things have been going....not great, not fun. Said things have added to me being shit at replying to messages but - I wanted to thank you for reaching out even after my silence and get back to you sooner. And I'm sorry, too, for that. I'm bad at keeping up (ask any other friend of mine! they'd know too!), and with my returning depression, it's also been harder. I find it hard to get out of bed to eat, and have been spending pretty much any free time I had on playing Sun Haven instead just to keep myself busy. Happy of a sort.

I still haven't written anything since we last spoke, BUT ... the timing on this is impeccable. For the past three days I have been thinking of this, like, not!fic? That I've had a plot bunny for, for years now. But it's come back to me and I keep pretending to think about writing it. Very nothingness, small ass fic just where a modern!au Dream is very Gross (LMFAO). Similar to him in the first bowspam post I ever wrote, where he jerks off to Tom in a very weird ass way. We come (lol) full circle. kinda inspired by another (thor.ki) fic but only like a snippet of that one. I'd love to write it one day, if for no one else but my own amusement, and you, of course. :)

So, I would say I still think about the dsmp, yeah. I don't read much of it or seek it out, but I still like it and probably will have moments of returning as I do with all things I've loved. Like, every few months I get kicked in the face with grief again and go find some beeduo posts to project onto. And I do WANT to write the bowspam I've come up with. I just... haven't written anything.

This is rambling and long. But I am touched that you thought of me and my writing. I think of our conversations too and the fics you recced! I still want to go back and read more of those. I need to reply to comments again too. (so since I have very little to give right now, I hope this big ass wall of text is something to chew on for a minute.) But I have to say I'm the same! Also obsessed. Nobody does it like them, I compare them to stuff I love and new things I see and it's never the same. God. They fucked me up good, the bastards.

I hope you're doing well! Better than I am, at least? Do tell me!! I've missed you and I'm sorry again. Thank you again as well for reaching out. It's been lovely to see you get up to things again. 💖💖

[horsesandfreckles]

Yep, this is definitely my favorite version of that meme --------------------- Artist: @yusaranghae314 on X/Twitter Posted with permission.

[overmyfreckledbody]

bad idea to associate a song with a character/ship. even worse idea to put it on while you put away laundry because you have it stuck in your head. all of a sudden you have this montage of your favorite moments from that 80k unfinished work from 2019 playing behind your eyelids and you're not even cleaning anymore.

TERRIBLE idea if you do this with a story/song you recommended to someone else and now your brain is saying hey why don't we text them now. BITCH NO!!!! FOLD THE KITCHEN TOWELS!!!!!!

[overmyfreckledbody]

you ever get a fuckass long comment on a fic out of nowhere that just annihilates you

very !!WHAT THE FUCK!! kinda moment

how do I even respond to that. like the first thing I want to say is "I'm in love with you"?????? this beautiful essay is LITERALLY OVER HALF THE LENGTH OF THE FIC...... telling them I am planning our wedding Right Fucking Now is not enough.

how anyone responds articulately to praise or being known or whatever the fuck it's called these days is beyond me. this comment is gonna carry me for MONTHS. I'm printing it out and folding it up and putting it under my pillow. holy shit.

[evernightterrae]

[lapseinrecs]

All Our Yesterdays

By bleep0bleep @bleep0bleep

On Archive of Our Own (account required)

Status: Complete; Oneshot; 9,201 words

Summary: “You’re strong. You’re a werewolf. You’re a Hale,” Laura says like that’s the most important thing in the world. Derek takes a deep breath and the sense of pack settles deep into his bones. The years chronicling Derek and Laura's life, from the fire to Laura's death.

My thoughts: Deals a lot with Derek's SA due to Kate Argent. Derek's in therapy. really really good tho. And I just like the fact that Derek had friends when he was living in New York (well, one friend) (not from NYC). And the ENDING!!! FUCK

Similar Works:

setting fire to our insides by OverMyFreckledBody @overmyfreckledbody (on AO3; oneshot; 4,591 words): Another fic centered around Laura and Derek in the years after the fire. Companion to this fic which made me cry so check it out too. Sometimes its not the things that are said but the absences of others... ohh a little insane.

The Unimaginable by ellipsisthegreat (on AO3; account required; oneshot; 3,049 words): Laura blames Derek for the fire and this made me cry FUCK.

Your Skin and Bones (Will Sink Like Stones) by jacyevans (on AO3; Oneshot; 6,094 words): Laura deserved better!!! And just poor Derek in general. They really go through it.

[overmyfreckledbody]

Oh and um what are your pronouns and are you ok with any affectionate names? Like baby or sweetheart? Honey? I use them in everyday conversation as like flier words ig? There's a name for those type of words but idk what it is rn.

Like in my reply this morning I wanted to say something similar to; it's ok baby don't worry about about taking time just live your life and I'm so sorry that you've had a bad time sweetheart, hoping your week looks up and has some better feelings. And I'm sorry that sucks and thank you love and I'm not sure what else I wanted to say or what I did say but idk about going back to read it either.

So: I'm sorry if my reply was short or not thought through or anything this morning I wasn't fully there yet still recovering from the 10-12 hour drive that was only supposed to be 6. And then sleeping for 9 hours. We drove for like 9ish hours there to see him and stayed awake the whole time then drove back and that took like 10-12 hours it wasn't fun mostly but some fun.

Love 🌮😸

Have a good day my pronouns are they/them

These have been sitting in my inbox too long (so sorry about that!) so this is gonna be a bit long. Under the read me it goes!

My pronouns are she/her! And I definitely love all kinds of affectionate nicknames and endearments. This includes honey/babe(y)/etc as well as nicknames you might come up with based off my username. Like, friends can call me Freckled - and I'd consider you a friend! I also refer to myself as OMFB in the third person lol. So whatever! I like everything you listed though. Do you? I can call you those things back, I like being able to do that with my friends. Got out of the habit with it though due to a couple people not liking them as much, unfortunately.

Thank you for saying all that. That is so sweet and actually does warm my heart. I feel even more guilty after you said that cuz I took a week - only for this to be WAY longer. I'm sorry. Even if you say not to be (and it DOES take a weight off my shoulders, even if I put it right back on), I do feel bad. It HAS been busy though. In a good way (mostly) this time though! So many things I've been waiting for finally started coming through. For example, I had an online friend stay with me for a while and it was such a wonderful experience, but we also were pretty much stitched at the hip the whole time, haha.

I know it's been a while too since your trip, but I do hope that you recovered from it nicely! I hope that you're doing well! I'm so curious how that could happen - doubling in time (though, I've been on long road trips, I can think of a few things...). Those are always stressful even if they're for things you love and/or are very excited for. So, I hope you had a good time when you look back on it now that things are back to normal. Also, don't ever worry about your own messages being too short. I love hearing from you at all. <3

Your other ask says:

Hi<3 I would love to read a blurb or anything if you want to post any!! And thanks for the fluff recs! I've actually read the first one. But I just read the second one and uaaahhh I loved it very much✨. I'm like so-so on the Omegaverse most of the time, for me it depends on the writing and that story was good. For me one of my favorites for DT is when they love each other and it's soft and nice but everyone around them is horrified and sees how fucked up it is. But like can't do anything about it. Well I don't care about reading what they But I also just love when D(is it better with initials? That's fine just wondering) is utterly obsessed with him (canon) and everyone else finally realizes just how much, just how "special" T is to him. How much they've done for and to each other. How Utterly obsessed and crazy for each other they could be.(D is delusional let's be honest, he ruined his own life and T's) Anyway what are some of your favorites ways they can be? My brain is back online now lol, love ya - 🌮😸

I actually went through a lot of my works to see what I could send (and I have a lot of NOTES, but they're no fun to read without context) and I haven't written anything in a while, but I did find a couple outtakes for the wishbaby series, so I will send you that in your other ask. Nothing major (though I thought about sending a huge one, and I might yet, but this one makes me laugh, so).

YES, I loved the second one, I still go back and reread that one a lot to this day. It's so good and sweet, but not in a way that feels off-putting for them. I love it a lot. I do LOVE a good "what we have is ours and idc if nobody else understands it because we're happy" (see also "because we're too obsessed/codepedant/possessive"). I'd have to look to see if I have any of those in my old recs, but it did remind me of an otherfandom fic.

(Either one. I'll follow your lead.) YESSS, I LOVE when it freaks everyone else out after they're like OH HE'S NUTS, NUTS. Like, T is in DANGER kinda nuts. And then you have T just fucking,, throw his life into the danger AGAIN because of "reasons"? Idk, T brain is wild. I get it, I can follow it (sometimes), but it's wild. He really makes up reasons to make them fight. But D does that too, he makes up reasons to "punish" T so. They're in love <3

I'm big into power imbalance, so I always love when D gets a momentary win over T. I love when he's extremely creepy and possessive and isolating. I love when their codependency shines. I love the fact that D actually murdered T to keep him bound to D forever and just - mostly got away with that? And kinda that everyone is off doing their own thing, so D gets away with a lot more until T asks someone else to step in (which he only does... sometimes?). Also with my writing, you can see that I like taking that obsession and adding a romantic lens over it, and then sometimes a sexual component to it. While I do not believe they intentionally were written/acted this way, I think as characters it's very much easy to view D as being in love (or if you argue "romantically obsessed") with T. And it's just clear enough to T that he could just fuck off and do his own thing which could be devastating enough to D - but he doesn't. He STILL would find ways to go back to/after D. And it can be read as requitment, of a sort. To me, anyway. And that still drives me crazy.

So that's stuff I love in canon (with a splash of how I interpret canon). As for fandom/fic stuff, I think just anything that was similar, took any of those aspects and magnified it under a shipping view. I love AUs, but especially when they keep it fucked in some form or fashion. And as the wishbaby au suggests, I'm a sucker for kidfics, even when the ship should NOT have any. lol

<3

You gotta share with me some of YOUR fave recs then. I'm excited to see the stuff you've been liking. Especially if it's more recent stuff that I haven't yet come across. Much love! Missed you while I was away.

[overmyfreckledbody]

Hmm, is it different cuz he escaped? Like in the first it sounded like Sam was gonna help him keep the baby in the prison, but no he still wanted to escape anyway. So not that.

-ima be honest I haven't reread the cut out yet, again cuz I was to excited, and I just commented on ao3. Your a lovely person and I put the word kinda at the being instead of kind and I'm sorry, your not just kinda. Lol.

-🌮😸

Oooh, no, not that! I'll be upfront about how that was never going to work out - and Dream knows it too. No, instead it's actually that one, teensy line referencing XD! Who is a character only in the remix because certain implications with his presence and wishbabies… make it totally different than what the original fic was.

Basically, while it continues from GmYfM, that change kind of "retcons" or changes things, so that's why it's a remix rather than straight up a sequel. But all that makes more sense with… more context in the other scenes. Lol

And aww, thank you so much! I also think you're lovely and I've been so excited to talk with you! I hope you still are even after my radio silence. <3 Your comments and words have really blew me away and I'm so glad you gifted them to me. I hope we can continue to chat!

[overmyfreckledbody]

I'm squealing, I'm dying, I'm screeching, I'm aghast (did i even use that right?)

Hi, is 🌮😸 a good alias lol? Ik ik but still. Thanks so much, for posting that last one I mean, I've yet to respond on ao3 yet but ily and I'll get to it soon when I'm not dying of happiness. I love having new friends.

Um, do you have any fluffy fic recs? You don't have to answer rn but I thought it is an ask so asking something seems mandatory lol. And I like to do something I call fluffy Sunday, just reading at least a little fluff every week for good mental health and all that.

Thanks again, love you again <3-🌮😸

I'll take it!! <3 <3

Yes, it is! And I'll use that as your own tag now. And I'm sorry myself for taking so long to reply to YOUR messages! I've had a really busy and rough week, but I want you to know I've been thinking of your messages often since! I'm excited to talk to you too, and I truly apologize it took so long.

As for fluffy recs, I don't have a whole bunch, and they are older ones, but I do have these two. They're as close to fluff as I have without divulging into straight up crack territory (one of my favorites), but they're soft & sweet, which isn't what I normally read for DT, but it's what I have. For anything else I'd have to go to other fandoms, lmao.

all the right ways, in the wrong time by Anonymous (4/4 - 25,804 - rated E - "modern/non-mc AU", it's good vibes imo)

like the sun by abandoned_acc_clyde (1/1 - 9,420 - rated E - omegaverse, NOT fucked up DT dynamics lmao)

and I love you too!! <3 <3 <3

[overmyfreckledbody]

secret wishbaby part 2 sneak peak scene

[Set in the remix/sequel, shortly after the end of God made You for Me. Contains a blink-and-you-miss-it reference to why this is a remix.]

---

He’s in some wooden building, with lots of pictures over the walls, and the air even inside is chilled by the snow that blows outside one of the windows. He doesn’t recognize any of it.

But he does recognize the infant in the basket in front of him.

Ellie.

He doesn’t waste time. With haste, he scoops her into his arms, lifting his clothes so he can snuggle her against his warmer, bare chest. It will protect her from the winds and snow outside. While she is safe from the temperature inside with the hat and bundled clothes she has been changed into, he knows that any little bit will help until he can get out of this biome. He plans to be swift about it, as per XD’s warning.

He grabs her basket, too. Spotting the chest beside her, he opens it to see – yes, formula and diapers. As those are also necessary, he grabs everything and drops it all in his inventory before making for the trapdoor.

There, he weighs the time spent on either option it presents before deciding to just steady his grip on Ellie and bite the fall damage. He hits the floor with a soft thunk, but it isn’t any louder than the creaks of climbing down the ladder would be. In his arms, Ellie grunts at the jerking motion, and he spares just a moment to look down his collar at her.

“You’ll be quiet for me, won’t you, Ellie?” He whispers, and glances around. Still no one else, but he has no certainties on how long that will last. He heads for the door, taking care to walk as quick as he can while still remaining quiet, stepping next to walls and furniture to minimize the groans of shifting wood floors. “I’ll get us somewhere safe.”

In the opposite of quietness, Ellie lets out a loud snort. She then blinks up at him, wide, blue eyes the picture of innocence. It’s as if she did just to contradict him and then dared him to call her out on it.

Just like someone else he knows. Just the like.

“Helpful,” he mutters to her. It lacks heat. He feels like he should have had more adrenaline from the possibility that someone else heard that, but the most prevalent emotion he’s feeling is… fondness.

Christ, she’s going to make him leave him so open and weak. He can see it now.

Oh well. Too late to change that.

Casting one last sweep around, he pushes open the door. Murmurs, chin tilted in her direction but doesn’t look away from the piles of snow he has just uncovered, “Try not to let out any more of those, yeah? At least until we’re far enough away for me to appreciate them.”

Ellie remains, blessedly, silent. Very much not like someone else he knows.

Unlike his opinion on her eyes, he doesn’t know how he feels about that changing.

[l1p3k4]

Yay! December! ❄️☃️

[six-paths-of-jeanmarco]

them them them it's them

[aerizworld]

🤨🏳️‍🌈❓