It's Too Bad You're Married To Me
Anton Chigurh x Female reader
Word Count:5.2k
Warnings: Smut, creampie, oral sex (f receiving), p in v
He keeps on running away like he always does. But he blames it on his job and not the lack of feelings towards you. It was a mix of both; if you were to be honest it felt like the latter more than the first. Anton wasn't sure how to love you; he wasn't even sure if he could. You weren't sure what was going on with him, but you knew something was up.
The marriage between the both of you was purely a mystery, neither of you really knew how it came to be. But when you thought about it maybe it was for the best that you didn't know. You could only make a guess if he knew, whenever you asked, he would just brush it off. It made you slightly suspicious, but you eventually let it go.
What you do remember was when you first met and when he asked for your hand in marriage, but anything other than that was a blur. Your wedding night was anything but typical. Anton had gotten an offer for a job, of course he accepted it and left you alone. Alone on your wedding night. After that you never expected Anton to be home, just so you wouldn't be disappointed.
The silence was deafening in your house, not relaxing. For weeks on end, you would be alone, only traveling out when you needed to. Since you knew what your husband does, the outside world seemed terrifying. Just sitting on the front porch made you feel nervous. Even in your living room you felt like you didn't belong there. You couldn't help but look over your shoulder every time you took a shower for Christ's sake.
There was always a chance that someone could hunt down your husband and find you. But obviously with Anton as your husband that was very, very, unlikely.
You don't mind what Anton does for a living, there were only a few downsides you could think of. Things like being away for so long, the chance of getting caught up in it, and the fact that he kills people. The main one you had a problem with was the first reason,
All you wanted was to bond with him, spend time with him, just be around him. If you were going to be honest you would settle with him just being home, he didn't even have to be around you.
Something intimate and special, one of love and trust.
In Anton's point of view, he was obsessed with you, he couldn't get enough, yet he rarely was with you. He knew about his destructive tendencies, so he kept himself away from you, not wanting to harm you. You didn't know that though, you thought it was simply because he felt nothing towards you, it might not be love but it was certainly not nothing.
You thought your marriage was a complete wreck, that anytime he came home, he was going to leave you. He made no hints towards wanting to divorce you, but it just seemed like he would. Maybe deep down you wanted him to leave you, you didn't have the guts to, so if your relationship was to end it had to be because of his doing.
Maybe it was because you thought no one else would want a woman like you, or maybe you were so desperate to get it over with that you chose him. You liked to think it was because of fate, so in that case there was no one to blame. You've felt guilty about it many times, maybe he would be closer with you if you'd treat him better, or if you made the house nicer.
If you just became better, just maybe he would treat you how a husband should treat his wife. Of course he wasn't going to do that, he just wasn't made to be a husband. That didn't stop you from dreaming.
Dreaming of never marrying anyone, never agreeing to this, never meeting him. Those were just dreams though, ones never able to come true, no matter what. Although there were a few times where you dreamed about him.
They were as cold and scary as him. One was where you and he were laying in your bed, bare and sweaty. Heavy breathing echoing in the otherwise silent room. Anton and you had just been making love a few minutes earlier; after reaching your climax you turned onto your side. You could feel the bed move as he did the same. He was staring at you; you could feel it.
His cold eyes were practically burning a hole in the back of your head. What was he thinking about? How did he feel about this? Did he enjoy it or was he merely doing this because he thinks he has to?
You thought he did enjoy it; he finished after all but that was just a normal reaction. He could have hated it and still finished so it really didn't matter. It didn't matter because it was but a dream, because he would have never made love to you, throughout your whole marriage, not once. Sure a few times you were close to it, but it never truly happened.
Your thoughts seemed to take over without you realizing. It was now night as you came back to reality and not your dream world. The room was dimly lit by an old lamp that coated the room in a sort of warm blanket of light. You were in your bed, dressed in pajamas, just staring up at the aged yellow-white ceiling. There was a soft hum of the air conditioner in the background, you wanted to turn it off but didn't want to get up.
So instead, you pulled the blanket closer to you, trying to stay warm despite the cold air blowing. That didn't work but it wasn't bothering you enough to get up and turn it off.
You could see the darkness of the night through your window, the stars seeming like grains of sand even though some of them were bigger than the planet you stood on. The stars were practically drawing you in, drawing you back into your fake reality
Only a few minutes later, you snapped out of it when you heard the front door open. Anton was back. Just what you wanted. A sense of dread filled you as you heard his footsteps become louder. Your heartbeat increased as you could see his shadow underneath the bottom of the door. In a few seconds you would be face to face with him.
Your eyes focused on the door as the knob twisted until the door opened, revealing his dark figure. His eyes were the only thing you could make out clearly. They always seemed to be on you whenever he was around. He walked forward into the light, you could see there was a bandage on his face, he got hurt again.
Whenever he returned, he had some sort of injury whether that be a broken bone, a gunshot wound, or a simple scrape. You never questioned it, you didn't really want to know what he did while he was away.
Anton moved towards you slowly, like a cat ready to pounce on the unfortunate mouse it's chosen to eat. He sat down on the bed; he sat down rather close to you. What was he doing, what was he getting at here? Why was he all of the sudden being close to you on purpose?
You threw any idea of that out of your head, you were obviously just over thinking about it. There wasn't any hidden message in his actions, you knew that. But still why did your mind wonder about the possibilities of what he could try to be saying?
His hand crept up the bed until it reached your blanket covered thigh. You could feel the warmness soaking through the thin blanket and onto your skin. The action caused a shive to run up your spine, it excited you in some sad pathetic messed up kind of way. You weren't used to him touching you all that often so when he did, it made you act strange.
Just thinking about it made you feel sad for yourself, you didn't know how to act when your husband touched you. It wasn't even anything crazy, just a simple hand on your thigh, yet it made you feel confused. It left you over thinking about simple actions that shouldn't be over thought.
Anton noticed the way you were reacting, not exactly knowing how you're feeling but he had a pretty good guess. He withdrew his hand, not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable or anything.
Being married to him made him act differently towards you. A psychopath like him couldn't feel emotions like everyone else but he knew how he should feel. So, he pretended to love and care for you, but he did a poor job of it. You weren't really sure who he was trying to fool but you let him believe it was working and that you didn't know a thing about him being different.
You sat up, reaching a handout to grab the side of his face. He let you grab him; you were going to do anything bad, that he knew for sure. The bandage was slightly peeling off; you could see underneath it. It was a shallow wound, nothing too bad but it looked like it could be changed.
"How about you I change that bandage for you?"
He didn't respond with words but rather with a simple nod of the head.
The blanket fell off of you as you got up. You extended your hand out for him to grab it, he took it, wrapping his large hand over your smaller one. Anton wasn't a big man, but it was how he carried himself. If height was based on that, he would be huge.
You walked over to the bathroom, leading him into the small room. His body was rigid, if you didn't know any better you would have thought he was nervous. As he stared down at you, you put a hand on his shoulder and pushed him down until he was sitting on the edge of the tub. His eyes were now looking up rather than staring down.
His eyes were the one thing that could make you feel any emotion, scared, at ease, turned on, a whole roller-coaster of them. Right now, they made you feel nervous, like they were expecting you to do something.
Your hand slowly peeled off the bandage he had on his cheek. The wound underneath seemed to be a day old, and rather shallow, just barely scraping the surface. You opened the medicine cabinet and grabbed some antiseptic and bandages. The antiseptic soaked through the piece of cloth rather quickly; the smell of alcohol filled the air.
You brought the wet cloth up to his face, hesitating a second before pressing it on the wound. His face twisted in pain, but he didn't let out any sound, not even a little gasp. That made you wonder if he was holding it in, or if it didn't hurt that bad. If you were in his position, you would have made some sort of noise. So why didn't he? Maybe it was because he was used to it, or something along those lines.
When it was finally cleaned, you put the bandage on. The feeling of his face was something new to you, you felt his stubble against your fingers, the dips in his face due to wrinkles, it was nice to know what he felt like. A subtle smile appeared on your face before you realized he was staring at you.
You quickly pulled away but before you could fully get away, he grabbed your arm.
"What are you doi-"
He cut you off with a simple look as he rose from the edge of the tub and pushed you back until you were out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. Anton didn't fully stop until you sat on the edge of the bed.
"I've realized that the whole time we've been married you haven't asked to be with me. Why?
Did he seriously just ask you that? How could you even respond to a question like that? Just thinking about it made you freeze up, looking up at him, his eyes glaring back. Your mouth opened like it was ready with a response but in reality, you didn't have any. You had to think of something though, you couldn't just not respond to him.
"Well, I don't know, I guess I haven't thought about it all too much, besides I'm sure you're not really into stuff like that."
You almost let out a sigh of relief, that was a much better response then you thought you would have. Anton just looked at you, it was like you could see the gears shifting in his head.
"I've never hinted at not liking that, so where did you get that idea?"
What was with him and all these questions, why did it matter to him? It wasn't like you were touched starved, whenever you got needy, you took care of it yourself. It hasn't bothered you not being intimate but did it bother him? That would be shocking, but you guessed he was still human after all, and humans have their needs.
"You just seem like the type of person to not really be interested in that sort of thing; I didn't mean nothing by it."
It only took him a second to respond this time.
"Well, I am interested. Aren't you?"
You weren't sure what to say, of course you wanted to be intimate with him, he was your husband after all. Actually, agreeing to do it was completely different though.
"Don't deny it. I know you want it too."
Really? He wanted to try being intimate with you. There wasn't much to contemplate; after going so long without sex, it was nice to finally get an offer. But there was a small part of you that wanted to decline his offer. You were just a little nervous, you didn't know how he was going to react or do things, but you knew you had to trust him. He was your husband after all.
"That's-uh fine with me, but you don't have to do this if you don't want to Anton, it really doesn't matter to me."
Anton simply shook his head and began to take off his jacket. As you watched him undress you wondered if you should do the same, or if you should do it later. You fidgeted with the top button of your pajamas, not daring to look up at him. He took this as a sign to start unbuttoning your shirt, his hand replacing yours.
It wasn't long until you both were without a shirt. A husband and wife weren't supposed to feel like strangers, but you did. It wasn't like he never saw you bare but it wasn't anything sexual. Now the motive changed, everything else changed, the feeling of embarrassment flooded you like never before. You couldn't help but feel this way, it wasn't like you wanted to.
Your feelings didn't get by Anton; he saw right through you. It was like he could see everything you tried to hide, like it was impossible to keep anything a secret from him. His large hand gripped your chin, tilting your face upwards so your eyes could meet his own. Just the feeling of being watched made you feel uncomfortable.
But for some reason you couldn't look away, his deep brown eyes were practically luring you in. His hand let go of your face and began to caress your torso. Running the back of it against your stomach, all the way up to your breast and collarbones.
For some reason his touch didn't feel cold like it usually did. It was nice.
He turned his hand around, so his palm was now touching you. Anton glided his hand over one of your breasts, playing with the nipple until it hardened with his thumb. You felt your breath get caught in the back of your throat, and of course, he noticed that.
He took the chance to kiss you when your mouth was slightly agape. His lips were soft and warm against your own, if you were going to be honest, he was a lot better than you thought he was going to be. The kiss you shared was gentle, slow like never before.
It wasn't until you couldn't breathe, he finally broke the kiss. He was also slightly out of breath but not nearly as much as you. Only heavy breathing could be heard throughout the room, it calmed a part of you, the part that was nervous about this interaction.
As you just started to catch your breath, he kissed you again, this time it had more power behind it. The simple kissing between you and him seemed to last forever, you barely even noticed he stopped kissing your lips but rather your neck. It wasn't until you felt his hot tongue lick a long strip down the side of your neck.
You grabbed his head, making him look up at you, his dark brown eyes seeming to beg to continue. That sight alone was enough to make you let go and let him continue his work.
Anton was efficient in almost all parts of his life, he wasn't going to let this be the one part he was bad at. He left little marks along the side of your neck and down your collarbone. Those left you breathless but when he kissed down your breasts and stomach, it made you feel like you were floating. Not from pure bliss but just the feeling of finally getting close to your husband.
He only stopped when your pants got in the way. You tried to take them off yourself, but he quickly stopped you, he wanted to do it himself it seemed. Anton grabbed the top of your pants and pulled them all the way off. Now you were completely bare, everything exposed to him.
His eyes seemed to be soaking in the view in front of him. He sank before you, kneeling right in front of you, his hands seemed to wander onto your thighs. His broad shoulders pressing between your legs, making them spread to accommodate his large size. Antons's head was right up against your soft stomach; his skin was surprisingly cold.
The sight of him on his knees was nearly enough to make you fall apart, a warm feeling slowly crept through your body. It was particularly hot right below where his head was. You could feel his nose pressing into your stomach, maybe you were hearing things, but you could have sworn you heard him breathing rather hardly. Was he smelling you? Obviously, you weren't going to ask him that.
It was obvious he was though.
Anton moved his head lower until he was face to face with your bare cunt. He pressed his face right up against it, smelling you just like before. A feeling of embarrassment flooded you; you couldn't help but push his head away. Yet he didn't seem to budge, rather he stayed right where he was.
"Why are you pushing me away?"
You took a deep well needed breath before you responded to him.
"I don't know, it's just sorta embarrassing, with you being this close and all."
That made him pull away for a sec, just to look up at you.
"But I'm your husband, you shouldn't be embarrassed."
You couldn't believe he just said that. It wasn't like you wanted to be embarrassed; you couldn't help it.
"I know that Anton, just because you said I shouldn't doesn't mean it's going to make me feel any less embarrassed."
"Don't push me away again."
Did he really just ignore you?
"Fine I won't push you but if you're going to do something, hurry it up. I don't really like it when you're just staring at me."
He simply nodded and went back to his old position. You could feel his hot breath against your sensitive skin; it made you feel real in a sense. Like it reassured you that this was real and not some figment of your imagination. You were about to look down to see what he was doing but stopped once he got a taste of you.
His warm tongue licking a long strip down your arousal, just the taste of you caused his mouth to water. You tasted just as good as he thought you would, maybe even better. He quickly licked you again, this time not stopping. The feeling of your flesh against his tongue was enough to send shivers through his body.
As he continued his attack on your cunt, your breathing started to get heavier, your skin stickier with sweat. You were sorta shocked by how good he was at this, it's not that you thought he was incompetent at this type of thing but just not this good. Maybe it's just beginner's luck. Maybe.
The way his tongue lapped at your folds made you shiver in pleasure, you wished this feeling would never go away. His dark hair tickled the inside of your thigh; it was enough to make you laugh. Not full-blown laughter, but a soft breathy kind of laugh instead. Suddenly Anton held onto your thighs harder, pulling you closer to the edge of the bed. If it wasn't for him holding you, you would surely be on the ground.
He wasn't messy in the way he ate you, but was rather collected, almost put together in a way. The only messy thing about this is you; you were a complete mess.
You could feel your stomach tightening, you knew you were getting close, it was only a matter of minutes. He knew it too; he could tell by how you were reacting.
Anton started to suck your clit, not hard or anything but just enough to get you bucking your hips. You started to gasp in pleasure; his tongue was working its magic on you. There was a part of you that wanted to look at him, to see what he looked like during this. Did he look like some crazed animal, or did he look the same? This time you didn't have a guess, after all you have never done this with him before.
You gathered all of your courage before redirecting your gaze onto him. He was already staring at you. His eyes were stark and cold, yet they didn't make you uncomfortable. Not like before. Somehow it was different, or maybe you didn't care anymore. You weren't sure which it could be, it didn't matter enough for you to really think about it.
His tongue swirling around your sensitive bud was enough to drive you over the edge. Your whole body shook as you reached your peak, your loud moans practically echoed throughout the room. The whole time this happened you maintained eye contact. It was like your eyes were locked with his, and there was no way to pull them apart.
As you started to come down from your high you noticed Anton didn't stop. It made you slightly curious on why that was. Wasn't this the time to do the real thing?
You tried to push his head away again. Just like he told you not to.
Anton slapped your hand away, causing you to yelp in surprise. For some reason he felt the need to continue.
You weren't sure how long you could put up with this. Usually, you were a one and done type of gal, the most you ever had in a row was three. And by the time you reached your third you were about to pass out. You couldn't help it though; it wasn't like you had much action due to Anton being away all the time. So, when you were in the mood, you just used your hand. It worked well enough to not leave you unsatisfied.
Since you had just cummed a few minutes ago, it wasn't long until he got you worked up again. Anton didn't go easy on you this time, he sucked much harder, licking you like he was trying to get your skin off. It wasn't painful but it certainly made you more overstimulated. You were already feeling like you were close again.
All you could think about was how intense he looked. Anton wasn't looking at you anymore, his eyebrows were furrowed, his shoulders like stones.
Your thighs quivered as you came a second time. You looked like a wreck, your hair was all messy, your skin was flushed, and you were shaking like you had just been out in the cold for hours.
Of course, he tried to continue but you didn't let him. This time you grabbed his hair, earning a groan from him in the process. You pulled his head away from your apex. He didn't look so happy about this.
Anton stood up and was about to protest before you shushed him.
"Do you mind explaining to me what that was? Because I sure as hell would like to know."
His anger seemed to fade away; a more playful expression was now on his face.
"Did I do something wrong?"
God, he sounded so condescending.
"I'm just wondering why you continued?"
"Did you not like it?"
It seemed to be that neither you nor he was answering each other's questions.
"Just warn me before you do something like that, okay?"
He didn't say anything, but you could tell he understood what you wanted.
Anton started to unbuckle his belt, his eyes never leaving yours. The air seemed to thicken around both of you, it felt like it slowed the two of you down, like it was drawing out each second. It wasn't until he pulled his pants down that you came back to reality, you had to restrain yourself from raising your eyebrows. He was big. Thick too.
You definitely weren't expecting all of that, but you weren't complaining. The both of you were finally bare, you wanted to do it now, but he seemed to be taking his sweet time. Anton sat down on the bed next to you, his hand moved onto your thigh and the other one was cupping your jaw. He pulled your head close to his and started to kiss you.
It was still slow but there was some real power behind it, he was oddly passionate, at least that's what you thought. He seemed so cold all the time, it was nice knowing that he had a soft side too. You almost thought of him as human instead of a cold-hearted killing machine.
His hands were now on your hips; with a sudden movement he lifted you up and helped you straddle him. Anton shifted, so he was now laying on the bed instead of having his legs off the side of the bed. You felt embarrassed but you didn't dare express it, you thought it would ruin the moment. He still knew.
For some reason he was just able to tell how you were feeling, he didn't need to ask you, but sometimes he did. He doesn't know why he asks if he knows already but he just feels the need to.
Anton guided your hips up before aligning himself with your entrance. He slowly let you down, so very slowly. At first it ached a bit from his size, a good ache though, and then it soon became pleasure. You lifted yourself up until he was almost out of you before slamming back down. All you could think of was how good he felt. He almost felt too good.
You put your hands on his chest to stabilize yourself, a part of you couldn't believe you were actually doing this. You were actually being intimate with your husband. Out of all the years you had been married to him you would have never thought it would ever get to this point.
It felt amazing every time you came back down; he was hitting everything right. Just when you thought it couldn't get better, you felt his thumb rub over your clit, not lazily but softly. The sensation made you shiver with pleasure; everything was just right. He was doing everything you wanted even though you didn't voice it. It made you wonder if he could read your mind.
Of course, he couldn't but you still wondered why he just knew exactly what you wanted. You could feel yourself getting closer again, this would be your third one if you counted right. But it didn't come.
Instead, Anton flipped you over, so that you were the one on their back. He leaned down real close to you; his arms practically enclosed you. A part of you was mad at him for switching positions but that didn't last for long. The way he thrusted was like heaven on earth. He was hitting all the right spots; it made you shake each time.
You were sweating a bunch by this point, your skin was sticky, and so was his. The hair surrounding his face clung to it, for some reason that sight excited you. For a second you watched his face, you watched how it contorted into pleasure. Not to mention his breathing, it was so heavy and animalistic. You wished you focused on him sooner.
All of this didn't go unnoticed by Anton; he was watching you too, and just as turned on, maybe even more turned on then you. You knew you were getting close; he could tell too. One of his hands moved down, between your thighs, and started to help you get there faster. The two of you stared at each other's eyes.
He needed to watch you fall apart; he had to. Your legs started to shake and your moans increased. All of this was like heaven too him, just watching you become so desperate was beautiful in his eyes. You cried out as you reached your peak. The two of you didn't lose eye contact once, both too focused on the other.
Anton wasn't long behind you, just a few seconds later he finished. You could feel his pulsing inside, filling you with him. The look in his eye was like no other, it felt so raw and real. For once in your marriage you actually felt connected with your husband.
The two of you stayed like that for what felt like hours but was actually minutes. Your bodies were dirty with sweat and other liquid, you didn't mind it though, it felt real and you didn't want to wash that away. But eventually Anton pulled out and laid beside you.
Neith of you spoke, the silence said more than words could.
You started to get tired; you turned onto your side facing away from him. Your mind started to wonder. Anton never acted like this before, so why was he acting like this now? Did something change in him? No, of course, not that was silly to even consider. He couldn't change; it wasn't possible. So why?
All of those questions seemed to fade away as he pulled you close to him. His arm wrapping around your waist and his head nuzzling into the croak of your neck. But there was a new question that popped up in your mind.
Why couldn't it be like this all the time?
