You were the best thing that ever happened to me. And you destroyed me.
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@pantlessforever
You were the best thing that ever happened to me. And you destroyed me.
I canāt leave my bedroom because Iām too scared to see people. I know they can see the pain and its only a reminder. At least if Iām alone in my bedroom, nobody can see me when a wave of sadness hits me like a ton of bricks.Ā
I wish I was dead.
Youāll never change.
Iāve finally come to terms with it.
Itās killing me.
Bridezilla coming through...
So Iām a bridezilla for, wait for it.....
Not wanting to waste my entire wedding night by walking around and saying hi to people.
And this is not to say that I wonāt say hello to people because, DUH, but rather that I wonāt lose my entire night doing so. Further, this was in response to a comment that I would apparently waste my night greeting my guests.
If I am going to throw a $50,000 party to celebrate myself and the love of my life, YOU BET YOUR FUCKING ASS IāM GOING TO ENJOY MYSELF.
If I want to spend all night on the dance floor at OUR WEDDING, YOU BET YOUR ASS IāM GOING TO DO JUST THAT.
So FUCK YOU and your shitty ass comments. I hope you enjoy never being included inĀ āwedding talkā again, cunt.
Left work early,
because I couldnāt keep it together. What happened to us?
I feel like I should stop social media for a while.
All of these people around me getting engaged/married and pregnant are just painful reminders of how far I am from those things myself.
Do I sound selfish for wanting to get engaged, for wanting to marry the man I love, as soon as possible? I made a promise to myself that I wouldnāt move in with him until weāre married and as of now that means I wonāt be able to live with him for at least two years. That would mean we will have been long distance for SEVEN years by the time that happens.
Iām starting to break. I have no control over the timing and its killing me. I just have to wait.
And Iām the one who wants it more.
Iām losing hope and patience and it just feels like he doesnāt want the same things.
Iām so fucking sick of the media escalating and misrepresenting so many situations.
Just finished reading about and watching videos from this new incident with a 15-year-old girl getting pepper sprayed by cops. Could it have been handled better on BOTH sides? Yes. But let me talk about what I saw and read and something that infuriates me.
According to all accounts, this girl did not obey traffic laws. Bicycles are, by law, required to adhere to exactly the same traffic laws as vehicles while on the road and this means stopping for red lights and stop signs. This girl did not stop at a red light and hit a personās car. AKA, she got into an accident. 911 was called and we are shown body camera footage from the first officer on the scene. The girl immediately tries to leave the scene of this accident, which, someone correct me if Iām wrong, would be considered a hit and run if this were two cars involved. Like I said, bicycles are required to adhere to the same laws as cars, so therein lies my second problem. So not only did she cause an accident and try to leave, but the officers also have a duty to keep her safe until she is returned to a parent or guardian.
She tries to leave on her bike and is stopped and thatās when shit really starts to hit the fan. Now she is becoming hysterical while the officers are trying to do their jobsĀ and avoid the potential of being held accountable for anything that happened to this girl if they were to let her go.
Donāt get me wrong, I understand that she was likely scared for her lifeĀ given recent events, but also keep in mind that she hit someoneās car, damaged said car, and even passed out for a period of time. And that last part REALLY pisses me off because from what I can tell, she wasnāt ever wearing a helmet. Ask anyone, seeing bikers/skateboarders/any person riding something other than a car on the road NOT WEARING A FUCKING HELMET literally infuriates me.Ā
Unfortunately, I also canāt help but feel like her hysterics were not only her being scared because she was in police custody as a biracial female, but also because she had marijuana on her. Notice in the video that she doesnāt want to call her parents because sheāllĀ āget in troubleā. Why would she get in trouble?
Okay, Iām stopping there because I just canāt keep my thoughts straight anymore, but I had to write them down somewhere. I didnāt want to have any arguments over facebook with people I donāt give a shit about, so this is where it gets to be written. Sorry not sorry.
Thanks for not even trying to help at all.
thethundercalls replied to your post āItās been a long time since Iāve felt this depressed without my period...ā
Comments are back! This is exactly how I feel too though about myself like EXACTLY
Hi! I canāt even believe youāre still following me. I havenāt been on this thing in so long. I also didnāt know comments were taken away? You shouldnāt feel that way. I think youāre pretty cool :)
Thereās not a single person in the world that knows me like Lucas knows me. I wonder if they did, would they like me more? Or less?Ā
I hate myself.
Iāve never fit in. Maybe Iām not supposed to. I donāt even know why Iām writing all of this here.
No matter how much he knows me, even he doesnāt know me. He doesnāt know how much I cry at home. He doesnāt know how much I hate myself (well I guess now he will). The last time I felt like this, I was in Boston and I was an even shittier person than I am now. I can feel myself slipping back into that and Iām scared.
I want to run away out west and spend my days watching the clouds and my nights watching the stars. I donāt want to have to worry about anything.
But I know thatās not possible
Itās been a long time since Iāve felt this depressed without my period coming soon. I feel so alone and stupid.
No one wants to be my friend. I havenāt met a person in so long that wanted to pursue being my friend. I actually donāt think I ever have met someone that wanted to pursue me other than my boyfriend. All of my current friends just kind of fell into my lap and I donāt even keep in touch with any of them.
Iām finally realizing its me, Iām the problem. Iām the shitty person, the shitty friend. I donāt even know what to do about it.
I feel so lost right now. I donāt know what to do with myself. Iām not happy.
I want to crawl into a hole and stay there forever.
I guess itās just time to accept the fact that romance is not something I can expect out of this relationship and thatās so fucking depressing for a hopeless romantic. I am, quite literally, hopeless.
Iām honestly not even looking forward to this trip.