You Have To
you've lived with this pain (inescapable//ignored) for so so long, and yet it's now, now that you have people who (believe//dismiss) you, you can't stand the agony of this existence anymore. Why? Why do you have to?
When you're so used to being alone with your (broken//healthy looking) body, when it's a secret hidden in all the empty bottles across your (charts//home), it's easier to downplay. It's never been ideal, as a child with such a unheard voice and so much hurt, rationally you know that you had to.
Now after so long, the warmth of (the sun//their concerns) hits you- suddenly the fragile bandaging around your flesh comes undone, and your wounds flash rust in the light. It's so terrible you wonder if it'll be worth it, all the (probing//waiting) to maybe get help. You grit your teeth against the catatonic waves of pain, if you want to heal, then you have to do.
Despite the needles (symptomatic//diagnostic), the questions (unanswered//repeated), you open up to more and more people and wait longer and longer to meet even more. It's not fair to any of us, I know, but you have to.
I'm so sorry that the earth has already taken so much from you, and that you may never get it back. That you'll have no choice but to take another fistful of (trade-offs//capsules) and don yet more (targets//equipment). I wish this could be easier, you deserve that at the very least. But that's not the reality we find ourselves in. So please, you have to hold on a bit longer.
Death is not an option, you will live through this.
You
Have
To
