there be dragons

Draco Malfoy Ladon 18 | Pureblood Hogwarts | 8th Year | Slytherin

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: You take your bullshit out on me like you do.

Ladon: That's simply because I'm generally an unpleasant person.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: I'm of the mind that you already know who I am and you're being a prick because of it.

Ladon: Truthfully, I haven't thought about it. If I did, I'm sure I could figure it out, but I prefer the anonymity this allows. It's easier to say certain things when you don't know who's on the other end.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: So I can watch you burn the brooms I bought? I'm gonna have to pass.

Ladon: Then, you do want me to figure out who you are. It will make it easier to know if I should warn the Headmistress again.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Well, apparently you have a bonfire to attend. That should amuse you for a few hours.

Ladon: I hope you're coming. By the sound of it, most of the eighth years are, so if you don't, it may become obvious who you are.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: What do you want, Ladon?

Ladon: Evidently, my days are more boring when I don't have you to annoy.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: More reason for you to keep trying.

Ladon: Tragically, it would be futile efforts. They've proved to be quite allergic to the concept of sanity.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Could be if you found someone new to institutionalize.

Ladon: Unfortunately, society has already decided that my friends are too mad to be helped and have given up.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Au revoir then. Bon voyage. Please forget to write.

Ladon: Unfortunately, my continued existence here is required. You're not free of me quite yet.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: What do you want, Ladon?

Ladon: To start a new life in France.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Clearly you don't know what you're talking about. Seamus' fire magic would have done the job proper.

Ladon: From what I've heard, there was no fire involved.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: I know what a spit-roast is, Ladon. I've seen the burnt pigs.

Ladon: I think we're both aware that what I'm talking about doesn't involve burnt pigs.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Now you want me to believe that Seamus and Dean are cannibals? I saw Neville hours ago, clearly they didn't eat him.

Ladon: Not that kind of spit-roast, Thorn, although your naiveite is adorable.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Why on Earth would I care about a threesome?

Ladon: Because Susan Bones apparently walked in on Longbottom getting spit-roasted by Thomas and Finnegan while the latter had dropped by for a visit.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: Then how exactly are you enjoying yourself? You find me burdensome and you've already forced me to confront my sexuality. What's left?

Ladon: I take it you haven't heard about the threesome that happened while you were away.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: And getting me admitted to the psych ward was enjoyable for you?

Ladon: Enjoyable, no, but did save me a headache of having to answer to the Headmistress if you had offed yourself.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: You'd think you would realize if I was going to off myself, I would have taken that route to avoid these lovely conversations.

Ladon: And, then, who would I have to scar for life? If I'm stuck with you as my partner for this infernal exercise, I might as well enjoy it.

[parchmatesdm]

Tablet ✉ #6

Thorn: I'd make a joke about wishing otherwise, but I'd rather not get sent back to the loony bin.

Ladon: It does seem wise to not give people reason to think it's necessary.