Parks and Rec Characters as John Mulaney Quotes
Leslie: Every time I walk down the street, I need everyone, all the time, to like me so much. It’s exhausting.
Ben: I’ve been nervous for 35 years.
April: Just ‘cause you’re accurate does not mean you’re interesting.
Andy: Ah… numbers. The letters of math.
Ron: I’ll keep all my emotions right here. And then one day, I’ll die.
Ann: Brush your teeth. Now, Boom! Orange Juice! That’s life.
Chris: I try to stay a little optimistic… Even though I will admit, things are getting pretty sticky.
Donna: Aw, I love how you just wear anything.
Tom: It’s 100% easier not to do things than to do them.
Jerry: My vibe is more like, “Hey, you could pour soup in my lap and I’ll probably apologize to you.”
Jean-Ralphio: 2029? That’s not a real year. By 2029, I’ll be drinking moon juice with President Jonathan Taylor Thomas. I’m not gonna be writing you a paper check.
Craig: No! That’s the thing I’m sensitive about!
Orin: Because it’s the one thing you can’t replace.
Perd: One feels like a duck splashing around in all this wet! And when one feels like a duck, one is happy!
Joan: Everyone get outta my way. I just wanna sit here and feed my birds.
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