“I’m still the same guy you loved in Liverpool” is a new development.
And whether Paul means John said those words or meant those words I’m actually very proud of him for being able to share that.
Like this is very huge for him actually because one of 4 things is happening:
1. John told him often and directly that they loved each other and he’s finally letting himself remember it and believe that memory.
2. John told him often and directly that they loved each other and he’s reached a point where he feels ready to tell the truth.
3. John told him often but indirectly though very clearly that they loved each other and he’s finally letting himself be un-gaslit and accept that meaning was there all along and he wasn’t making it up.
4. He knew all along that John told him often and indirectly though very clearly that they loved each other and he’s finally ready to tell the public that.
Either way this is a very big pivot/reframing of how he talks about how they talked about their feelings. His narrative has always been that they never did except one drunken night in Key West. So he’s either been lying because he is afraid of how people would react, lying to himself because he hasn’t felt confident enough in the love that they had for each other that his memories of John saying that were real/if John was implying it, he hasn’t felt confident enough in the love that they had for each other to trust that he was interpreting that implication properly after everything went down how it did. Either way, he’s ready to either accept that they told each other they loved each other/knew how they felt all along or he’s ready to share it.
The past few years really has been him going from being peacefully resigned that he’ll never quite have that stamp of being seen as a rightful partner (musically and otherwise) to John in the legacy to instead what he’s doing now which is sticking his toe in the doorway before the door closes and going “wait, actually, hang on. I WAS that important to him. We WERE equals. We DID love each other that much. He DID love me, too. Our names DO belong next to each other. It’s NOT discrediting him or anybody else to ask for my rightful spot next to him. We’re going out TOGETHER.”
And if that’s as far as he ever gets for us to see…. I’m proud of him! This silly grandpa I don’t know. That’s so different than what he let himself say even ten years ago.
