Percy Jackson

Insert a witty bio here. I like food.

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Maybe.  Or, maybe we’ll be long gone by then, and I won’t even really care about what happens to it.  Otherwise, there is absolutely no way they’re even going to think about touching it.  Yeah but, all those episodes are shorter, so the show itself goes faster.  Longer episodes seem to make a show drag out forever.  How do people not lose interest if these seasons are spread out that far?  You definitely would inspire most of those.  They’re actually the most uncomfortable thing to watch?  Like, how did he even think they were a good idea?  Two different ends of crazy, though.  Either way, retail just feels like the safer option still.”

“Maybe, but I have a feeling you’ll be one of those really young successful architects who will have so much notability you won’t know what to do with it. You can morph into scary construction site Annabeth and no one would even dare. I guess, but the episodes are filled with so much since there’s only ten they literally pack them with everything and it feels like a 22 minute show. I mean, they left it on a pretty massive cliffhanger. I guess if it’s that good, people won’t mind waiting. Then you can just rewatch the series, see if you missed anything, make new predictions, I don’t know. It’s been a hot minute, but I’m ready. I think they just finished filming it too, no idea why we have to wait another year though. I should be offended, but I’d be honored to inspire those. Uncomfortable? Excuse you, you’re supposed to tell me I look like Michael Jackson or something. I don’t think of them, alright? They just sort of happen. Yeah, I’ll run into a lot less problems. Can you imagine a monster just showing up at a strip club you worked at, like what would you do? No pants on and you have to kill it? Or worse, what if they were in there just for fun.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“I think as long as they don’t mess with the actual structure of it, there’s nothing they can really do.  Money talks more than preserving things, unfortunately, so they could change it to fit their needs, within reason.  That sounds like a really long commitment to a television show.  Like, even if there are only 70 episodes.  I’ll just have to take your word on it, because I don’t know when the next season comes out or anything.  Okay, good.  Because I didn’t just want to take off and pursue this without you being on board with it.  First off, don’t insult my favorite dance partner.  Secondly, his moves are just… I can’t even.  But that might be a slightly less… hectic profession.  Or, still hectic, but in a different way.”

“Isn’t that the sad truth. Who knows, maybe one day we’ll be fighting to protect one of your buildings someone’s trying to change into a resort. It’s shorter than How I Met Your Mother, Friends, and about 130 episodes shorter than The Office, so it’s pretty doable. I think it’s 2019 summer or something ridiculous like that. I’d totally be on board with that! I could tell everyone OG Annie B is my girlfriend and inspire some of her greatest roasts. I’m just giving you material for your first mix tape. I can’t even find the words to describe how incredibly embarrassed they make me or? Because same. But I can definitely imagine them being entertaining. This is true. It’s less hectic and doesn’t require as much talent, but probably the same amount of crazy customers.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Well, people would make a ton of money off it.  It’s an iconic building, so they’d be able to charge whatever they wanted for people to come there.  I just think they’re idiots myself who want to get some weird sort of rise out of people, but who knows?  They might live in caves.  It would make more sense, honestly.  Well, yeah.  I feel like everyone else has seen it but I’ve yet to sit through an episode.  I want to see it but I just have too much other stuff going on.  I’m telling you though, all coming from my rap career.  In fact, I’m thinking of dropping the whole architect thing entirely just to focus on it.  I thought you were stripping to pay for your college.”

“People who most likely already have a lot of money to begin with. Isn’t there laws protecting landmark buildings like that anyway? I guess they can’t change the outside cause it wouldn’t be the same Flatiron if they did. I can see that happening. It is long, but it’s easy to justify since there’s only ten episodes per season. So if you watch one episode a night, you’ll be done it in like, 70 days. I don’t even know if I’m mathing right, but I want to rewatch it before the last season comes out so maybe if we schedule an episode in every week we might be able to get it done in time! I would one hundred percent support that decision. I’ll be your number one groupie. I’ve recently discovered that while I’m a terrible dancer, Childish Gambino does not make my moves look any sexier. So, I’m thinking I’ll have to go back to retail work.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“I just know that that’s what they’re looking at turning it into.  But, who even knows?  Things change hands all the time, so it might not even happen.  I don’t know.  Apparently there are still some other idiots in the world that think that the world is still flat.  I still have yet to watch Game of Thrones, which I feel makes me really strange.  Exactly.  How do you think I’m paying for college?  Clearly, it’s with my underground rap career.”

“I’d sign a petition for that not to happen. It doesn’t sound like the brightest idea. Also, they could probably put that money into a better working line 2 or something. I hope not. Are they like, hermit people who live in caves and never come into contact with humanity? It makes you feel strange that you haven’t watched it? It’s honestly a really good show despite all the crap it gets for being violent and gory and stuff, it’s like a classic story. I did have my other guesses, but this really makes sense. It’s kind of right up your alley. Roasting people with really smart words that they wouldn’t be able to understand, and the rhyming probably comes natural to you because, well, you’re you. But, also, where can I get some of this money to pay for my college? ”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“I just know that they’re trying to turn it into a resort.  But there’s something about current occupancy issues or something.  Well, and people also only knew their own little corners of the world and the same way that they needed to travel to make money.  Why think the world was round if you were that closed off?  It’s too long to be a good rapper name.  I’d be OG Annie B, let’s be real here.”

“Oh really? That kind of sucks. I don’t think we need more tourist attraction spots here. Let’s go with something, because I probably won’t understand anything other than that. Yeah that’s true. It’s kind of fascinating but also unbelievable from our standpoint. Other world theories always reminds me of Game of Thrones and I’m just pumped for the final season whenever that decides to come out. And like I guess without knowledge of gravity, a round world wouldn’t really make sense. Oh my gods. I’m definitely writing that one down. I can’t even, the rhyme, are you sure you’re not an underground rapper in your spare time?”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Okay but, the Flatiron is really cool, so clearly she has good taste in buildings.  Like, people thought that the triangle shape with the height was going to cause the building to fall down.  There, now you’ve gotten another fun fact about the building from the OG Annabeth.”  

“I mean, it looks swanky as heck, so I’ll agree with you on that. I don’t really know what goes on inside that building, but it does add a certain pizzazz to New York’s charm. People thought a lot of things wouldn’t work. I’m still a little shook about people thinking the world was flat honestly. But, made sense at the time, like maps are flat. OG Annabeth. That could be your rapper name.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Pretty sure I just met an incarnate Annabeth while waiting to cross the street at the Flatiron because she started listing off 'fun facts’ about the building. A nice little reminder that it’s been too long since I’ve heard one of those amazing facts.” 

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Well, they’d probably just have to be huge ass wings anyway to carry us.  Literally just every time you didn’t want to deal with something, just nope and do a backflip into a sun before flying away.  Problem solved.  Somehow, this has to happen.  I would not.  Little dogs are gross and yippy and just get in the way.  Literally, I think I was sadder that the pie was gone rather than that the dog was having seizures.  Can’t make any promises, but I will try to stall if it is before 10 so you have plenty of time to get there.  Might even pitch them my wings idea just so they can have something to think about and plan what they’ll do once they’re invented to keep them occupied.”

“I want black wings. Oh man, that’d be the life. I’d be flying all the time, well, maybe not all the time considering I’m not sure how that’d bode with the big guy and his rule of the sky and all that jazz. But I’d definitely try. Technically it’s been tried before, but we just need some better mechanic than Icarus and we’re good to go. They are quite yippy. I mean, it’s a toss up, so I feel you. Even though watching a dog suffer is probably not the way I’d want to spend my Saturday, if it comes down to pie... There you go, kill two birds, or dogs if you will, with one pie. That idea will give me plenty of time.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Well, I’d use a different tone, but I’m trying to judge you a little bit over this.  You’re a little afraid of needles.  Besides, peeing in a bottle doesn’t tell you everything you need to know.  There are limitations there that don’t exist with drawing blood.  And even the blood’s not a perfect science.  I’m just saying, I have ways to make you go to the doctor if you don’t cave easily.  But you’re also my nice and loving boyfriend who doesn’t want to go to the doctor, so I’ll do what I have to to make sure you’re okay.  No, I get it, I do.  Things’ve been busy for me too but it’s just… four months is a long time with virtually no communication.  Look, it’s whatever.  We just missed out on some holidays, but other than that… no big deal.”

“I’d say I’m less than a little afraid. So, virtually nonexistent. I’m fine with giving blood once, but not multiple times in one go if it’s not going to give us answers. We clearly need to get more engineer science people to make this stuff easier, you know, for the people who are actually terrified of needles and having their blood drawn. As much as I’d fight this, that’s pretty sweet. So if it’s not better by next month, I’ll go. It’s not like we had no communication. Just, probably not as much as either of us would have liked... Okay, so I’m a crappy boyfriend, but you should have figured that out a while ago. I’m not totally against having a really belated Christmas. I mean, I did have a gift for you and everything that I never got to give you. But as of now, I’m not going anywhere, I’m only a poke away.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“You’re telling me that you’ve dealt with as much as you have, and the needles are what gets you?  Really?  Again, barely an adult.  Look, if you won’t go when your mom tells you or when I tell you, then I’ll play dirty.  I’ll tell your sister that you’re sick and when she asks you to go to the doctor, there’s no way you can say no.  You already remind me how old I am, so I don’t see why I shouldn’t use it against you on occasion.  And this occasion seems to suit me, so… I’m using it.  Yeah, it was like you disappeared on all of us again.  We can hope.  It’s been a while, but like I said, you weren’t exactly around, so there was no way to tell you about it right after it happened.”

“You know what, Annabeth, I don’t appreciate the judging sound in your voice. I’m not afraid of needles, I’d just rather pee in a bottle. Wow, that did not take the turn I thought it was going too. That’s real dirty. That’s like, evil. I’m sure I can convince her that I’m not sick if it came to that. I feel like you shouldn’t use anything against me because I’m your nice and loving boyfriend. Sorry, I’m going to try not too, thing have been busy though and then I feel like I’m not really awake when I am, and it’s just a mess in general. I feel like you’re a little mad? Which is understandable, but I really didn’t mean to just disappear.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“How awesome would that be though?  Like, you’d never have to deal with walking again.  Just… jump up and fly away.  Oh, for sure.  A title I think I’ll gladly accept.  Well, you know how those rich little old ladies are.  They need those tiny, special mixed breeds that half the time you can’t pronounce, and the other half, they just look stupid.  This one fell in the second category.  And then it acted stupid by eating the damn pie.  Of course.  Yeah, thanks.”

“That’d be super nice, although I feel like I’d probably put on so much weight my wings wouldn’t be able to carry me. In a stressful situation? Just fly on out of there. Oh man I want wings. It’s not a bad title to have. Are you saying if you were a rich little old lady you wouldn’t have a chihuahua mixed with a Pomeranian and carry it around with you? While I think that would cover both categories, I’d be all for it. What a waste of a pie. Anytime. Just try not to have your trial before 10 am, I’m not so much of a morning person since my sleeping routine got disrupted.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“That’s kind of what they have to do in order to know what’s going on with you.  You’re literally nineteen, so you’re barely an adult.  And I’d really like to witness the conversation where you tell your mom that she can’t make you do anything.  Besides that, she’s only my back up plan, and I’m older than you, so if I tell you that you have to go to the doctor, then you need to listen to your elder and do what I say.  They can only do so much, though.  You’ve missed a lot.  Give them time, they’ll probably come up with something else.  Granted, you might have to wait until summer since they pulled that back over Christmas.  It’s one of those oldies by goodies, I guess.”

“I’d much rather pee in a bottle or something non intrusive. I’m still classified as an adult, don't take that away from me. Not that she can’t make me do anything, just go to the doctors. Besides, I’ve definitely thrown that phrase in her face when I was younger and I think she just respects it now because there are still some things she can’t make me do or tell her. So this older thing, you can just pull the card whenever it fits and hope it doesn’t have any repercussions? I feel like I’ve been dead to the world a while, so I don’t doubt it. I hope it’s just as embarrassing and vile for Mr. D. Oh wow, it’s been that long, huh? Well, I’ll be waiting.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“You need those wings to do things in life it sounds like.  Those sound like the more fun approaches to it, anyway.  I’ve got you though if you do decide to switch it up.  It’s what I’m here for.  French Silk.  Probably if it’s premeditated or whatever, but this was an accident.  It was dumb enough to get the pie down and eat half of it on its own, so I’m completely innocent of the whole thing.”

“I wouldn’t complain with a set of wings, although I guess I have one in horse form, but personal ones would be handy. Definitely is more fun to complain. Thanks, I’ll crown you as the new distributor of wings. Oh wow, fancy dog. Did it have those little chocolate curls on it? Look at you already building your case, you’ve got me as someone to call if you need to testify on your behalf.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Hopefully you get over it.  Otherwise, I’ll just have to annoy you until you go to the doctor to get it figured out.  And, if that doesn’t work, I’ll just have to call your mom to have her make you go.  Because it’s not good if it is messing with you like that.  You need to get it checked out.  Apparently the only person who ate any was Mr. D and his eyes were like bulging out of his head from it.  He threatened to turn everyone into a dolphin, but it seems he didn’t get to follow through on the threat.”

“Doctors are a no for me, they just want to poke and prod and take blood. My mom can’t make me go, I’m a fully grown man. But I might consult a Hypnos kid or someone in the infirmary if it doesn’t go away. Wow, and I missed that. I would have paid to see that, you think I can get them to do it again or something just as good? As he does, you’d think he’d find a new threat after all these years. As much fun as I would have had with a pet dolphin for a while, I’m glad no campers were harmed in the making of this prank.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“Red Bull and 5 hour energy shots.  They should keep you more alert so you aren’t so all over the place.  ‘Course, they can also make you feel like your heart’s about to burst out of your chest, but… it’s something you get used to.  Then if you’re already doing it, who cares?  If it died from the seizures, at least it went out satisfied.  I haven’t heard anything yet.  And what’s the worst they could really do?  Make me get them another dog?”

“Surprisingly, I’ve actually never had a Red Bull or any form of energy drink. Honestly don’t think anything can keep me from being all over the place. As much as I’d love to feel like I’m having a heart attack, I think I’m going to stick to conventional methods like complaining and sleeping, but if it gets any worse, I’m coming to you for wings. This is true, but I gotta ask, what kind of pie was it? I don’t know, can people go to jail for killing a dog? Probably.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“It’s fine, Percy.  But look, if you’re that tired, maybe you should just go ahead and go to sleep.  Coffee can only do so much for so long, and then you’ll crash and it’ll be even harder trying to get through to you.  Apparently it was milk they already had, but it was left out in the sun, and then they thought it would be funny to use it for ice cream.  I mean, the last version had more to it than that, but… there’s your highlights.”

“I don’t even think sleep is helping as weird as it sounds. I wake up and still feel incredibly tired. I think it’s just a state I’m in or something. I’ll get over it eventually I hope because it’s starting to affect my concentration, not that that needed any affecting. Oh my gods, that sounds horrible. That’s so gross, imagine thinking you were about to dig your spoon into a nice tub of ice cream and then that happens, I’d be pretty furious.”

[perseusposeidonjackson]

“That sounds like a personal problem then.  It’s only a matter of time before you zone out on something important.  Well, half the pie is in the dog, and the other half’s gone to the world now.  Eh, I guess it’s okay.  Didn’t really stick around long enough after the owner got back to find out.”

“It’s definitely a personal problem. I’m trying to sort it out as fast as I can. To be fair, I probably already do that, so I don't see what else there’s left to lose. Oh shit, that poor dog. But I also kind of envy it, got the half a pie. Well, heres to hoping they don’t have any surveillance of any kind.”