Kaluwa alakija

Persona roleplay account!! You can also interact with my persona!

[personaroleplayaccount]

persona introduction!

Kaluwa alakija is a minor like mod irl

kaluwa has PTSD from the sudden battle from above heaven so such as, sudden movements, swords, arrows, screaming will trigger it and they will starts to shake a lot due to the sudden movements or loud sound and it will freeze up.

Kaluwa was unfortunately caught in the middle of everything and her earwings got burned along with her back wings and waist wings are burned but will try to fly to escape but always fails.

shes an angel and people tends to get a bit freaked out, but bad people like animal hunters try to kill her, but kaluwa protects the animals from any harm so they wouldn't die or get hurt.

kaluwa is half blind in her right eye because one of the angels slashed a sword across her eye by accident.

kaluwa is a INFP-T meaning that they're personlity is always sensitive! (Not sure if I got the meaning right so let me know!

kaluwa is kind but scared to make new friends because what if they would betray them.

kaluwa can’t fight at all so they’re kinda useless

kaluwa likes hugs and or cuddles because they find it comforting! Sometimes forehead kisses and cheek kisses on the face helps the calm down ofc it’s platonic!

kaluwa is agender! Meaning they have no gender at all but they/them is okay! Along with ze/hir

more will come soon!

Before the sudden battle, wings a-okay, happy, only injuried minority, normally dressed!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the battle, developed PTSD, a INFP-T, Blind in one eye, Scared, earwings and back wings, and waist wings All burned; and an outfit changed! And hair more messy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

also Kaluwa has Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder (DMDD) which is a mental health condition in children (ages 6–18) characterized by severe, chronic irritability and frequent, intense temper outbursts that are grossly disproportionate to the situation, often disrupting daily life at home, school, or with peers (I looked it up but do let me know if it’s wrong! Happy to learn new things!)

[personaroleplayaccount]

'A song? of a memory and the past of anti-night.'

*after I got patched up and i fell asleep, it was a new day, as I decided to walk to the library that was in the anti-night house (or cabin) as i decded to sing a song I remember my father singing to me when i was little in heaven's gate or a well know song he sang to me*

"mhmhm.. our ancienter had to fight to survive just so we could have a chance of a life, were not here so we can blow it all, we could bear witness to rise and the fall!"

*I sang parts of it before continuing*

"Ancient dreams in a modern land!! i'm trying to get back as fast i can, back to a time before I had form back to a time before I was born! you dont have to be like everyone else you dont have to fit into the norm!"

*I continue to sing to myself as I enter the library*

"how did it go again? I know that part of the song.. hm. I can figure it out later! but right now! time for some research about anti night I guess! and I think about the past and who used to run it!"

*I said as i looked around the library to see what is similar or different to anti night but then, I noticed a perfect book that says the past/history of Anti-night but it was out of my reach, I couldn't use my wings because, yk it was still healing*

"damn it.. its to high for me! and there's no ladders.. I guess I got to climb! I hope Anon doesn't get mad at me for messing up the library and me climbing up here, AND mr.shepared noticing me missing"

*I prayed but knowing my luck, it would fail me as I started to climb the shelf to get that ONE book I needed*

[personaroleplayaccount]

((OOC: it’s a part two >:3 Uhh feel free to join in! But if your busy then that’s okay!))

“I almost got it…!”

*I was close to grabbing it but knowing my luck, it failed me once again, as I accidentally slipped because the ladder had wheels and it went the other way as I fell to the ground with a loud THUD!!*

“owwww… ow ow ow ow ow.. That was a fail… ougghhhh… my head hurts…”

*I just stayed on the floor because I knew I was gonna get in trouble with either Anon or Mr.Shepard due to my recklessness*

[personaroleplayaccount]

'A song? of a memory and the past of anti-night.'

*after I got patched up and i fell asleep, it was a new day, as I decided to walk to the library that was in the anti-night house (or cabin) as i decded to sing a song I remember my father singing to me when i was little in heaven's gate or a well know song he sang to me*

"mhmhm.. our ancienter had to fight to survive just so we could have a chance of a life, were not here so we can blow it all, we could bear witness to rise and the fall!"

*I sang parts of it before continuing*

"Ancient dreams in a modern land!! i'm trying to get back as fast i can, back to a time before I had form back to a time before I was born! you dont have to be like everyone else you dont have to fit into the norm!"

*I continue to sing to myself as I enter the library*

"how did it go again? I know that part of the song.. hm. I can figure it out later! but right now! time for some research about anti night I guess! and I think about the past and who used to run it!"

*I said as i looked around the library to see what is similar or different to anti night but then, I noticed a perfect book that says the past/history of Anti-night but it was out of my reach, I couldn't use my wings because, yk it was still healing*

"damn it.. its to high for me! and there's no ladders.. I guess I got to climb! I hope Anon doesn't get mad at me for messing up the library and me climbing up here, AND mr.shepared noticing me missing"

*I prayed but knowing my luck, it would fail me as I started to climb the shelf to get that ONE book I needed*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

(Why not some Angsty stuff with my persona Kaluwa! And I’m so sorry if I bugged ya on accident if you’re doing smt irl :[ and take your time too! ^^)

*I decided to walk up to The shepherd’s door as I hesitated a bit before knocking on it’s door*

“h-h-hey Shepherd…. I-i-I’m sorry if I’m bugging you but… I-I-I have a mental problem… I-i just had a nightmare which made me do something reckless… a-and I’m scared… my arms, wrist and hands even my knuckles are bleeding… I’m not sure what to do… I just had a flashback… I’m scared…”

*I said as I tried not to burst into tears because I just had a flashback again… to the war as I felt my body trembled under from the fear*

Door open noises.

"...Oh, oh dear, your crying. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I tried to wipe my tears away but my bloody wrists was only smearing the blood across my face, as my body trembled from me crying and I tried to stop my arms, wrist and hands from bleeding*

“I-I’m a-scared… I’m so fucking scared… it’s been a w-while since I had a nightmare… *Hic* I’m scared.. I’ve done something reckless… which made me hurt myself…”

*I choked out*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

They raise their arms as to give them an embrace, even if their arms are bleeding.

" Come here. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I walked closer to Ajar as I wrapped my arms around him crying but I also didn’t want to get blood on his clothes so I was a bit hesitant at the same time*

((OOC: mod is doing this MID CLASS- wish them luck! That their phone don’t get taken away))

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

The Shepherd softly give them a headpat, while also reassuring quietly to the angel that everything is going to be okay.

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I continue to cry and sniffle as I hugged him tighter because the Flashback was that scary to me..*

*Hic* “I’m scared.. I’m so scared… my arms, wrist, hands hurt so badly… I regret doing something reckless… I’m scared… and I’m sorry that I knocked on your door on this ungodly time of night…”

*I apologize as I continue to sniffle and cry*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

"It is never your fault for doing so,

I do not act harsh, and cold, because a Shepherd must take care of their own flock yes? "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I gave out a small nod as i managed to calm down a bit, My eyes droopy from me crying alot and my energy being low*

"its not...? okay.... m'sorry though... there's broken glass in my room i need to clean it-" *I gave out a tired yawn as I almost fell asleep but i managed to jolt awake*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

"Why not rest somewhere else?

I can clean it for you,

but I need to put bandages on your arms first. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*i gave out a tired nod*

“o-okayy.. t-thank you..”

*I said tiredly because the crying and the recklessness I did took a toll on me and my energy it took from me*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

(Why not some Angsty stuff with my persona Kaluwa! And I’m so sorry if I bugged ya on accident if you’re doing smt irl :[ and take your time too! ^^)

*I decided to walk up to The shepherd’s door as I hesitated a bit before knocking on it’s door*

“h-h-hey Shepherd…. I-i-I’m sorry if I’m bugging you but… I-I-I have a mental problem… I-i just had a nightmare which made me do something reckless… a-and I’m scared… my arms, wrist and hands even my knuckles are bleeding… I’m not sure what to do… I just had a flashback… I’m scared…”

*I said as I tried not to burst into tears because I just had a flashback again… to the war as I felt my body trembled under from the fear*

Door open noises.

"...Oh, oh dear, your crying. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I tried to wipe my tears away but my bloody wrists was only smearing the blood across my face, as my body trembled from me crying and I tried to stop my arms, wrist and hands from bleeding*

“I-I’m a-scared… I’m so fucking scared… it’s been a w-while since I had a nightmare… *Hic* I’m scared.. I’ve done something reckless… which made me hurt myself…”

*I choked out*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

They raise their arms as to give them an embrace, even if their arms are bleeding.

" Come here. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I walked closer to Ajar as I wrapped my arms around him crying but I also didn’t want to get blood on his clothes so I was a bit hesitant at the same time*

((OOC: mod is doing this MID CLASS- wish them luck! That their phone don’t get taken away))

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

The Shepherd softly give them a headpat, while also reassuring quietly to the angel that everything is going to be okay.

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I continue to cry and sniffle as I hugged him tighter because the Flashback was that scary to me..*

*Hic* “I’m scared.. I’m so scared… my arms, wrist, hands hurt so badly… I regret doing something reckless… I’m scared… and I’m sorry that I knocked on your door on this ungodly time of night…”

*I apologize as I continue to sniffle and cry*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

"It is never your fault for doing so,

I do not act harsh, and cold, because a Shepherd must take care of their own flock yes? "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I gave out a small nod as i managed to calm down a bit, My eyes droopy from me crying alot and my energy being low*

"its not...? okay.... m'sorry though... there's broken glass in my room i need to clean it-" *I gave out a tired yawn as I almost fell asleep but i managed to jolt awake*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

(Why not some Angsty stuff with my persona Kaluwa! And I’m so sorry if I bugged ya on accident if you’re doing smt irl :[ and take your time too! ^^)

*I decided to walk up to The shepherd’s door as I hesitated a bit before knocking on it’s door*

“h-h-hey Shepherd…. I-i-I’m sorry if I’m bugging you but… I-I-I have a mental problem… I-i just had a nightmare which made me do something reckless… a-and I’m scared… my arms, wrist and hands even my knuckles are bleeding… I’m not sure what to do… I just had a flashback… I’m scared…”

*I said as I tried not to burst into tears because I just had a flashback again… to the war as I felt my body trembled under from the fear*

Door open noises.

"...Oh, oh dear, your crying. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I tried to wipe my tears away but my bloody wrists was only smearing the blood across my face, as my body trembled from me crying and I tried to stop my arms, wrist and hands from bleeding*

“I-I’m a-scared… I’m so fucking scared… it’s been a w-while since I had a nightmare… *Hic* I’m scared.. I’ve done something reckless… which made me hurt myself…”

*I choked out*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

They raise their arms as to give them an embrace, even if their arms are bleeding.

" Come here. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I walked closer to Ajar as I wrapped my arms around him crying but I also didn’t want to get blood on his clothes so I was a bit hesitant at the same time*

((OOC: mod is doing this MID CLASS- wish them luck! That their phone don’t get taken away))

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

The Shepherd softly give them a headpat, while also reassuring quietly to the angel that everything is going to be okay.

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I continue to cry and sniffle as I hugged him tighter because the Flashback was that scary to me..*

*Hic* “I’m scared.. I’m so scared… my arms, wrist, hands hurt so badly… I regret doing something reckless… I’m scared… and I’m sorry that I knocked on your door on this ungodly time of night…”

*I apologize as I continue to sniffle and cry*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

(Why not some Angsty stuff with my persona Kaluwa! And I’m so sorry if I bugged ya on accident if you’re doing smt irl :[ and take your time too! ^^)

*I decided to walk up to The shepherd’s door as I hesitated a bit before knocking on it’s door*

“h-h-hey Shepherd…. I-i-I’m sorry if I’m bugging you but… I-I-I have a mental problem… I-i just had a nightmare which made me do something reckless… a-and I’m scared… my arms, wrist and hands even my knuckles are bleeding… I’m not sure what to do… I just had a flashback… I’m scared…”

*I said as I tried not to burst into tears because I just had a flashback again… to the war as I felt my body trembled under from the fear*

Door open noises.

"...Oh, oh dear, your crying. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I tried to wipe my tears away but my bloody wrists was only smearing the blood across my face, as my body trembled from me crying and I tried to stop my arms, wrist and hands from bleeding*

“I-I’m a-scared… I’m so fucking scared… it’s been a w-while since I had a nightmare… *Hic* I’m scared.. I’ve done something reckless… which made me hurt myself…”

*I choked out*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

They raise their arms as to give them an embrace, even if their arms are bleeding.

" Come here. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I walked closer to Ajar as I wrapped my arms around him crying but I also didn’t want to get blood on his clothes so I was a bit hesitant at the same time*

((OOC: mod is doing this MID CLASS- wish them luck! That their phone don’t get taken away))

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

(Why not some Angsty stuff with my persona Kaluwa! And I’m so sorry if I bugged ya on accident if you’re doing smt irl :[ and take your time too! ^^)

*I decided to walk up to The shepherd’s door as I hesitated a bit before knocking on it’s door*

“h-h-hey Shepherd…. I-i-I’m sorry if I’m bugging you but… I-I-I have a mental problem… I-i just had a nightmare which made me do something reckless… a-and I’m scared… my arms, wrist and hands even my knuckles are bleeding… I’m not sure what to do… I just had a flashback… I’m scared…”

*I said as I tried not to burst into tears because I just had a flashback again… to the war as I felt my body trembled under from the fear*

Door open noises.

"...Oh, oh dear, your crying. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I tried to wipe my tears away but my bloody wrists was only smearing the blood across my face, as my body trembled from me crying and I tried to stop my arms, wrist and hands from bleeding*

“I-I’m a-scared… I’m so fucking scared… it’s been a w-while since I had a nightmare… *Hic* I’m scared.. I’ve done something reckless… which made me hurt myself…”

*I choked out*

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

They raise their arms as to give them an embrace, even if their arms are bleeding.

" Come here. "

[thenquotetheraven-nevermore]

(Why not some Angsty stuff with my persona Kaluwa! And I’m so sorry if I bugged ya on accident if you’re doing smt irl :[ and take your time too! ^^)

*I decided to walk up to The shepherd’s door as I hesitated a bit before knocking on it’s door*

“h-h-hey Shepherd…. I-i-I’m sorry if I’m bugging you but… I-I-I have a mental problem… I-i just had a nightmare which made me do something reckless… a-and I’m scared… my arms, wrist and hands even my knuckles are bleeding… I’m not sure what to do… I just had a flashback… I’m scared…”

*I said as I tried not to burst into tears because I just had a flashback again… to the war as I felt my body trembled under from the fear*

Door open noises.

"...Oh, oh dear, your crying. "

[personaroleplayaccount]

*I tried to wipe my tears away but my bloody wrists was only smearing the blood across my face, as my body trembled from me crying and I tried to stop my arms, wrist and hands from bleeding*

“I-I’m a-scared… I’m so fucking scared… it’s been a w-while since I had a nightmare… *Hic* I’m scared.. I’ve done something reckless… which made me hurt myself…”

*I choked out*

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: CHECK IT OUT!!

[personaroleplayaccount]

ooc: uh persona playlist!

and art credits to Sol4r on YouTube for the art!!! >w<

THIS SHIT GONNA TAKE A WHILE

[personaroleplayaccount]

"Another flashback"

TW: for bullying and violence, and possible suicidal thoughts.

*After I got patched up, I went outside this time; to relax and to detox but I had another flashback... probably getting my memory back slowly, I remembered the war which I told anon about, which was me, after my day of helping good souls, but I didn't mention that I was bullied in heaven's gate, they don't need to know that, right?*

💭

"That should be the last one!" *I said as I made sure there was no more souls, and there wasn't as I felt my heart rate pick up because I knew some kids my age pick on me for no reason as I left my booth outside of heavens gate and as it was getting slightly late, and near the same alley I noticed 2 kids, the same ages as me, Astride and his friend Thiago and they quickly walked over me as soon when they saw me"

Astride: "Look what we have here~ the pathetic loner Kaluwa! dont know you know that your name means "the forgotten one" AND people always forget you!" *he mocked out before shoving Kaluwa to the ground*

Thiago: "YEAH! people even forget that you even exist! isnt that sad?" *she also mocked before kicking kaluwa in the ribs*

*I couldn't help but yelp in pain from that.. and I started to get pushed around, to the wall, dirt, etc., getting hurt and kicked, hell even slapped. what did I do. to deserve this.*

💭

*After the flashback I felt a sharp pain in my side as i rubbed it slightly*

"ow.. what the fuck was that?!"

*I said as I started to look around me but I found nothing*

"But it is getting cold.. ugh... I'm staying out here.. I just feel bad for annoying the shepherd and anon.. maybe I should attempt.. once again.. idk... I honestly don't want to make anyone sad.. but.. I can't do this anymore... im going to attempt to jump again.. I dont wanna be here anymore I just can't..."

[personaroleplayaccount]

'sudden flashback'

(this takes place after Kaluwa doesn't get help but gets a flashback about the aftermath of the war/battle repost if ya want! Ill be patient! (IRL IM REALLY PAITENT! yet kind of clingy to certain people-) but also the first post is "Sudden fall" so read that first before this to get a better understanding ^^)

*I decided not to get help because I don't want to burden anon nor the shepherd as I felt my mind getting a flashback to the war which made me cry even more..*

*The flashback came into my head.. and it came like this..*

💭

*I was doing the soul check in, where I check to see if the souls that was lined up was capable of entering heaven's gate as I spoke to the soul that died from a gunshot wound to the heart then head*

"Okay! mx. Amar Latife! you're here because you died due to a gunshot wound to the head and heart? if I'm not mistaken!" *I said in a gentle tone*

A: Yes, I did unfortunately die due to a gunshot wound, when protecting my loved one.

"I see. it does say that you help people in need! and never did anything bad! welcome to heaven's gate Amar!" *I said happily*

A: Thank you so much mx! *They said happily before gaining their wings before walking into heaven*

**A few hours went by, and I was at last at the final soul. but I heard a big boom in heaven, in the city, and I quickly ran over there just to get shot in the calf with an arrow which made me yelp in pain... I Looked up to see a devil... How did a devil get into heaven's gate?! and fire was everywhere too.. people screaming, people running away, people injured.. even dead..*

"w-what are you doing here! Óscar Dário!! I THOUGHT I BANISHED YOU!! YOU DID EVIL THINGS!! AS A HU--"

*I got cut off by Óscar because She pulled out a sword before I could defend, well Couldn't.. Óscar started to attack me, which forced me to stand up and scurry away but failed because My earwings, back wings, and waist wings caught on fire as i started to scream in agony and then.. the clouds broke.. which made me fall through the clouds and onto earth while I continued to scream..*

💭

*Then I slowly snapped out of it… then I realized that I needed help.. as I slowly stood up before leaving the room either to get anon or the Shepard as my arms, wrist, hands and knuckles were bleeding, but I decided to go to the Shepard for comfort since I didn’t want to burden Anon any further*

[personaroleplayaccount]

”nightmare”

*After I got tucked into bed by anon, I started to have nightmares of the war.. the situation… the words were playing in my head…*

“Your home is gone”

“your fault!”

“you should’ve died!”

“you failed”

“why didn’t you save me?”

“memories are like weapons~”

*I woke up in a jolt.. I was alone.. as I slowly started to cry and a possible PTSD attack from the war.. as I got out of bed to scramble to the long mirror so I can collect myself but it only made it worse… I started to see insults of my own mother saying how much I failed..*

Mother?: “you know that you failed as an angel.. you been falling since you were born, I only helped you because your a useless child that can’t even defend yourself.. honestly, you deserved to get hurt, you deserve it because you’re utterly Pathetic, Useless, Worthless, Stupid, Child that I had to give birth too!”

*I punched the mirror which made a loud shatter so I could stop hearing these nasty voices as i started to cry even harder as I kept punching the broken glass that was on the floor, to vent my anger out as my arms and hands, knuckles were now trickling down with Blood as it ran down my arms, to wrist now to my fingers which dripped, slowly… but it hurts so badly but I couldn’t stop punching the glass because I was so mad at myself.. I couldn’t help the 900 people that died.. in the fire.. the war… it’s My fault.. maybe I did deserve to get hurt..*

“It’s my fault!! MY FUCKING FAULT!! DAMN IT!!”

*I choked out as I kept sobbing and having a ptsd attack*

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: it’s an add on and read the nightmare one first then this one >:3

*I slowly realized about what I was doing as I forced myself to stop punching the really broken up glass as I looked at my arms, wrist, hands and knuckles were bleeding a bit badly as I started to whimper in pain and a few glass shards was in my arms*

“fuck fuck fuck fuck! What did I do what did I do! Ow ow ow ow ow ow!!! Who do I go too?! Anon? or the shepherd..?! Oh great heavens it hurts..! Fuck! I’m so stupid!! Fuck!! Idk who to go to for help!! DAMN IT!!”

*I cried out to myself now crying in pain and still having my PTSD attack*

[personaroleplayaccount]

”nightmare”

*After I got tucked into bed by anon, I started to have nightmares of the war.. the situation… the words were playing in my head…*

“Your home is gone”

“your fault!”

“you should’ve died!”

“you failed”

“why didn’t you save me?”

“memories are like weapons~”

*I woke up in a jolt.. I was alone.. as I slowly started to cry and a possible PTSD attack from the war.. as I got out of bed to scramble to the long mirror so I can collect myself but it only made it worse… I started to see insults of my own mother saying how much I failed..*

Mother?: “you know that you failed as an angel.. you been falling since you were born, I only helped you because your a useless child that can’t even defend yourself.. honestly, you deserved to get hurt, you deserve it because you’re utterly Pathetic, Useless, Worthless, Stupid, Child that I had to give birth too!”

*I punched the mirror which made a loud shatter so I could stop hearing these nasty voices as i started to cry even harder as I kept punching the broken glass that was on the floor, to vent my anger out as my arms and hands, knuckles were now trickling down with Blood as it ran down my arms, to wrist now to my fingers which dripped, slowly… but it hurts so badly but I couldn’t stop punching the glass because I was so mad at myself.. I couldn’t help the 900 people that died.. in the fire.. the war… it’s My fault.. maybe I did deserve to get hurt..*

“It’s my fault!! MY FUCKING FAULT!! DAMN IT!!”

*I choked out as I kept sobbing and having a ptsd attack*

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: this might be the final thing for my persona lore (that I’m gonna write about soon!)

tw: blood and attempt suicide

3/18/20xx at 3:20 am..

[ohno011]

//SOBS.

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: uh here’s a brick i forgot to throw 🥹 *Chucks a brick at you*/silly

[ohno011]

//SCREAMS????? RUNS AWAY FROM YOU AT FULL SPEED

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: YOU CANT ESCAPE FROM THE ANGST!!

[ohno011]

//EEEEEK!!!!!! O_O

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: MUHEHEHEHE!! >:3

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: this might be the final thing for my persona lore (that I’m gonna write about soon!)

tw: blood and attempt suicide

3/18/20xx at 3:20 am..

[ohno011]

//SOBS.

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: uh here’s a brick i forgot to throw 🥹 *Chucks a brick at you*/silly

[ohno011]

//SCREAMS????? RUNS AWAY FROM YOU AT FULL SPEED

[personaroleplayaccount]

OOC: YOU CANT ESCAPE FROM THE ANGST!!