The Upmost Wacky Of The Transfem Shenanigans

Certified Aluminum Consumer. Professional Squishy ass Catgirl. Guys, don't worry. I got an OSHA card for this. (18+, no porn or anything. Just, probably will say a lot of insane shit sometimes)

[persondy-t]

I was wiping my ass when I got a glob of shit on my finger. Now like the normal person I am, I thought to myself: "I have a glob of shit on my finger. This has never been the case outside of the bathroom. There MUST be some new opportunities opened by this revelation"

[persondy-t]

Fuck I have tumblr. I need to start just posting my thoughts like the greats before me did

[persondy-t]

Mfw I find a really weird

The Cheesecake Factory

[persondy-t]

Me captured: "AWE you GOTTA be KIDDING me"

Deranged puppygirl firing up the age regression beam: "yes"

[contemptible-scoundrel]

that oafish homie u keep around for his considerable physical strength and little else

[gnilliam]

the oafish homie you keep around for his compassionate heart of gold and other endearing qualities

[contemptible-scoundrel]

different guy

[martyparty23]

That oarfish homie you keep around for his ability to predict earthquakes and tsunamis when he ventures to the surface waters.

[contemptible-scoundrel]

you may be confused

[persondy-t]

That oatish homie you keep around for his delectable culinary potential

[persondy-t]

"WE ALL OUTTA ORB!"

The suspiciously orb shaped woman:

I'm so silly sitting down like, Im an orb. I'm so volumetric in this chair

[persondy-t]

HORROR IDEA

You're in a room (say a classroom or a workplace or a bright lit place where you go every day or even a dark place) and you need to follow your status quo or else the people's eyes start to void out and their heads slowly creak toward you. Like you talk to someone new and everyone in the room loses humanity with black dripping eyes and an empty void mouth. The longer you don't compensate for your diversion from the status quo, the louder the croaking or groaning noises they make get and the more intense the void is. Eventually they stand up and approach until they reach you and force feed you void liquid from their hand or their mouth or something. No this isn't going to be fetish on main this is actually relevant. As you feel your innards flood and clog you slowly feel if your blood is urging itself to escape your body. The blood vessels expand intensely and your blood pressure rises. Eventually it all gets pushed out by void fluid. You retain the memories from your time as you, but they're another's memories now. You forever live clouded and bursting with void inside you. Idk

[persondy-t]

Life is realizing that cigarettes, weed, ballsmell, and abundant dogshit are not good smells to be nostalgic about

I think some aspects of my life have been weird lmao

[persondy-t]

You're listening to

[ kitty mrrp mrow sounds ]

Cat FM

[ "pspspspspsps" ]

Greatest Headpats in the Valley

[ cartoon-cat yell sound ]

Sit on your keyboard, make biscuits, and enjoy this upcoming hit

[ Radioactive - Imagine Dragons begins playing ]

(Inspired by caitlikescoffee's puppydog radio lmao)

[persondy-t]

[persondy-t]

[persondy-t]

Average unhinged Tumblrsondy post

[persondy-t]

I'd like to think that every night I cut myself, my arm goes through mitosis with lego star wars building noises. Like, I pass out, and you hear "ccckckckkllckclclclclclclckckckckckckcllcckckclclckckclclclclclckckckckxklxckkczlxlkckckcck" and then one week later when my scab picking ass finds a completely healed cut I hear "phhwwoooeeeeeeezzzshh" and the lego build is finally complete

[persondy-t]

"Yeah I listen to Weezer!"

Have sex

"Hah, yeah I listen to Weezer!"

Realize I'm wrong and actually haven't listened to Weezer much if at all in like a year

Guys it's a real thing I swear.

My Weezer privileges have been stripped from me under my nose.

[persondy-t]

If

You stick your finger in your ass far enough via reaching in front of you, you can kind of hold your ass like a bowling ball.

Now, if I'm considered round due to my size, could I be loosely considered a ball?

Now you need a ball in order to bowl, and it needs to be able to be held like a bowling ball. I

Now if this is the case, could I walk into a bowling alley with a finger in my ass, jump forward into a lane, curl into a ball, and bowl myself and get a strike?

Think, Joe Biden. Think

[persondy-t]

Ya girl had unreciprocated feelings

I don't know what to do of feel

[persondy-t]

Help god I think it's my turn to feel fucking feelings for this man. God dammit. He held my head in his arms in the dead of night in his car.