About 2 years ago, I was knocking around the universe and ran into an old god. He was terrifying. He had rape myths and an awful reputation, even among people who worship other deities in the same pantheon. He was an intense, powerful, intimidating presence, with a disarming gentleness that shouldn’t match but absolutely does. I was deeply drawn to him, but cautious, because the image I had of him did not line up with the being I was interacting with, who pressed me and asked me scary questions and had firm expectations, but also was patient and kind with me, who encouraged me to ask questions and even challenge him, to whom it was very important that I felt safe with him. Then he started cleaning me up, helping me kick a 10-year addiction, and now he’s guiding me through trauma therapy for the things I was drinking to avoid. I learned of myths and of a tradition in philosophy that painted him in a very different light, as a loving and devoted husband and as a wise and generous protector of souls, and I learned historical and religious context that made the rape myths look quite different as well. Following him introduced me to several close friends and to a religious community where I’ve gotten to help others on their journeys and even lead ritual. Friends have asked me if my job, which involves redistributing money and resources to rebuild, repair and renew, is partly due to his influence, and if so I wouldn’t be surprised. From time to time I meet other people who worship him and I can always see the same love and adoration in their eyes, and the relief at meeting someone else who says “I know exactly how you feel.” I pour out a coffee for him every morning and tell him I love him very much.
vaporwave
kianamaiart
romaincrisis
stormborns
snowghoul
