Philosophy Professor Quotes

The silly, absurd, and occasionally profound things that philosophy professors say. Submissions accepted. (function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){i['GoogleAnalyticsObject']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){ (i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o), m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m) })(window,document,'script','//www.google-analytics.com/analytics.js','ga'); ga('create', 'UA-53273204-1', 'auto'); ga('send', 'pageview');

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Hume’s brute reading of how color works is quite disturbing, even more so than his bleak view of morals.

Ethics professor (via philosophyprofessorquotes)

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Descartes is the dartboard at which Pascal throws his darts.

History of Philosophy professor

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“Are you interested in the truth or are you interested in winning?”

Ethics professor

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Philosophy is sort of like sex. It is fun to watch other people do it but nothing compares to doing it yourself.

Epistemology Professor

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For Nietzsche, a guy nailed to a two by four just isn't God material.

History of Philosophy professor

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Honestly in this type of argument I like to just take a moment to blame Descartes for everything and move on.

Epistemology professor

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Remember, there's no shame in switching careers.

Ethics professor on his last lecture of the Introduction to Philosophy course.

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Nothing is literally happening and yet it means everything.

Metaphysics professor

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You can teach an entire first order logic class without using the word ‘set’ and the only thing you would lose is fashion.

Logic professor

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People that do work on modal auxiliary verbs like ’shall’ and ‘will’ tend to go crazy after awhile.

Philosophy of Language professor (via philosophyprofessorquotes)

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And that's more or less the outline of Kantian idealism. I'll now take comments on this deplorable set of views.

History of Philosophy professor

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Nietzsche was high and sick when he wrote On the Genealogy of Morals in fifteen days. So... good luck, guys.

History of Philosophy professor

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Put in too many parentheses and you’ll go blind.

Logic professor (via philosophyprofessorquotes)

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Hume wrote ‘A Treatise of Human Nature’ when he was 23 — about your age. Make sure you’ve accomplished something of equal value in the next few years.

History of Philosophy professor (via philosophyprofessorquotes)

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No defense of Utilitarianism is complete without sliding on your trusty rubber gloves and getting to work in the baby fields.

Ethics professor

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I like to think of Nietzsche in terms of The Republic. Actually, I like to think of everything in terms of The Republic.

Ethics professor (via philosophyprofessorquotes)

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Believe me when I say I'm an excellent teacher. Kant is just complicated.

History of Philosophy professor