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indie.  selective.  max caulfield from life is strange.  est. 01.20.17.  ||  please read rules.  written by abraham!

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– – ‘ UPDATE

     Hey guys!  I want to apologize for being gone for so long.  I feel really bad about it.  I have this weird thing where I find muse in a character, create them a blog, and then get distracted by another.

     I’m not sure what I’m going to do here. I really wanna keep roleplaying Max, be- cause LIS is still relevant and still amaz- ing.  I just don’t know if I have the time.

     I just wanted to update you guys on what’s happening!  In the mean time, you can find me on @eggofreak & @thefoxsden.

                                                                 Love ya, guys!

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-- -- ‘ UPDATE

     Hey guys!  I want to apologize for being gone for so long.  I feel really bad about it.  I have this weird thing where I find muse in a character, create them a blog, and then get distracted by another.

     I’m not sure what I’m going to do here. I really wanna keep roleplaying Max, be- cause LIS is still relevant and still amaz- ing.  I just don’t know if I have the time.

     I just wanted to update you guys on what’s happening!  In the mean time, you can find me on @eggofreak & @thefoxsden.

                                                                 Love ya, guys!

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'

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-- -- ‘ STARTER CALL

     Mutuals, feel free to like this or hit me up through IM!  By liking it you get: literally whatever type of starter I can think up of.  By IMing me you get: to plot out a starter that’ll probably work out better.  But do whatever, man!

[alannasroleplaymemes-moved]

Comfort Sentence Starters

Adjust pronouns as necessary.

“It’s going to be okay.” “You don’t need someone/something that toxic in your life.” “Trust me, I’ve been there.” “You can rise above this.” “I’m here for you.” “You deserve better.” “I can’t stand to see you this upset.” “Think of it this way: it could have been a lot worse.” “I’m just glad you’re okay.” “You can rise above this!” “Do you need a hug? You look like you need a hug.” “What can I do to make you feel better?” “It’s not the end of the world, remember that.” “You don’t need them.” “I will always be on your side.” “We don’t have to talk about it, but when you’re ready…I’m here.” “Do you need to vent?” “You did the right thing.” “You’re so much better off without them.” “Someone like you shouldn’t cry over someone like them.” “Smile for me, please?”

[rp-ask-memes-deactivated2026012]

MAKE MY CHARACTER FEEL LOVED.

all of this ANGST lately – while nice – it’s getting a bit OLD. I want your character to try their best and make mine feel super loved. give them ALL you’ve got. make them blush like crazy and CRY because they’ve never heard such beautiful things before. do it. I dare you.

[altmax]

you’re max fucking caulfield, time warrior.

[satakentia]

[the-sundance-kiddo]

mostly nature

[trcshymemes]

GAME GRUMPS SENTENCE STARTERS. 

❝ God, what if we just fucked one day? ❞

❝ Don’t sass me in front of the internet. ❞

❝ Follow your stupid fucking dreams. ❞

❝ Come at me scrub lord, I’m ripped. ❞

❝ I just wanna have sex with space. ❞

❝ Get in the tub with me, daddy. ❞

❝ Will you just relax and let me kill for money? ❞

❝ That sounds like your problem. Fuck you. ❞

❝ Stay in school. Don’t do drugs. Eat your teeth. ❞ 

❝ Make like a tree and fucking die. ❞

❝ Dude just…just pity laugh at least. ❞

❝ Man, Club Penguin’s gotten weird. ❞

❝ We are like the Stephen Kings of stupid. ❞

❝ Why do you enjoy watching me suffer so? ❞

❝ Do I have to jerk you off to blow your mind? ❞

❝ I haven’t had so much fun since I killed my parents. ❞

❝ Unfortunately I had sex with a guy/girl over the weekend. ❞

❝ What’s a vegetarian zombie say? GRAAAAAAAINS. ❞

❝ Revenge is a best dish served fuck you. ❞

❝ Who wears pants anymore? So 2015. ❞

❝ I need an ice cream sandwich and a gentle blowjob. ❞

❝ Don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya. ❞

❝ The bananas has gone bad! ❞

❝ I cared for those bananas! I raised them with my own two feet! ❞

❝ Did you know I’m a professional joke? My life is a joke. ❞

❝ What if everyone just had constant helicopter dick? ❞

❝ [ name ], does getting me wet fill you with determination? ❞

❝ I can’t prove that someone ISN’T a reptilian. ❞

❝ Wouldn’t it be funny if, like, you lost a family member? ❞

❝ These balls are coming at me fast and furious. It’s like that movie, ‘Speed’. ❞ 

❝ Call me One Direction ‘cause my relevancy is dropping by the day. ❞ 

❝ One time I killed a person and I didn’t report it to the police. ❞

❝ I wanna take a girl to the Grand Canyon, fuck her, and throw her in. ❞ 

❝ Nothing like a gunshot wound to the face to really mellow someone out. ❞ 

❝ If I can’t be the best, I sure as hell can be the worst! ❞ 

❝ [ name ], I’m on a date with a guy/girl right now and you’re embarrassing me. ❞

❝ I’ve made a decision. I’m gonna in the kitchen, gonna open the dishwasher, and I’m gonna climb inside. ❞

❝ I do apologize for my actions, even though they were totally and completely justified. ❞

❝ I could pee on this couch, right now, no problem, while looking you directly in the eyes.❞ 

❝ Look, you tell a couple jokes as a dad and suddenly everyone’s like ‘you’re making dad jokes.’ ❞

❝ All of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are blue, except for three of them. And there are four. ❞ 

❝ And Abraham said unto Moses, ‘Bro, dude, aliens.’ ❞

❝ I’m gonna throw you out the window. We don’t even have any windows in this room…I’m gonna carve out a window and throw you through it. ❞ 

❝ DO IT YOU SACK OF SHIT! – Sorry. That didn’t come out as encouraging as I meant it to. ❞

❝ [ name ], if there’s one thing I can be totally honest about, it’s that I would happily lie to your face.❞

❝ If I took pole-dancing, I would be worried that it would be too erotic for everybody else. ❞

❝ Next time we make love, [ name ], would you please refer to me as your sweet cakey treasure? ❞   

❝ I try to show at least one other human-being my butt hole every single day. ❞

❝ The only people who don’t like sluts are the people who don’t get any. ❞ 

❝ Have you ever though of a career in driving people fucking insane? Because you are already a PRO at it. ❞ 

❝ I am actively looking for ways to get you to shut the fuck up. ❞

❝ First of all, you have to stop calling it ‘Mary Jane.’ That’s the first rule of stonerdom. People will think you’re a fucking narc. ❞

❝ First of all, no one says ‘pot-eyes’, you fuckin’ narc. ❞

❝ If by OK you mean like on the inside I’m just going ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!’ then yes, I’m quite OK ❞

❝ When you walk outside there are three elements of nature that you must avoid: snow, wind, and bees. ❞ 

❝ Could you imagine if you unlocked outfits in real life? Like, “Congratulations you wiped your ass, here’s a new shirt.” ❞

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– – ‘ PLOTTING CALL

     Hey guys!  So, I’ve got everything situated, I’ve got all my verses in check, and I’m ready to do some serious threads!  I’m excited to build chemistry between characters and the whole nine.  So, hit that heart and I’ll come into your IM to plot out some threads.

[daddyogladio]

rpmemesfam:

kissy sentence starters.

“ is it bad i really want to kiss you right now? ” “ do me a favor, kiss my ass. ” “ they can all just kiss my ass. ” “ i kissed someone today. ” “ i kissed a girl/boy and i liked it. ” “ kissing burns calories you know. ” “ my lips really want to meet yours. ” “ so are we going to kiss or not? ” “ i sent you a bunch of kiss emojis. ” “ don’t talk, just kiss me. ” “ i really enjoyed our kiss last night. ” “ you make me want to kiss you. ” “ you owe me a kiss. ” “ pucker up. ” “ read my lips, no. ” “ your eyes say no but your lips say yes. ” “ i just want to kiss you. ” “ i miss your lips. ” “ give me a kiss. ” “ blow a kiss my way for good luck. ” “ ever kiss in the rain? ” “ ever kiss under water? ” “ it was just a kiss, that’s all. ” “ a kiss doesn’t mean anything. ” “ i love when our lips meet. ” “ where do you want me to kiss you? ” “ i want to either kiss you or kill you right now. ” “ did you really just kiss him/her? ” “ friends aren’t allowed to kiss one another. ” “ kiss me one more time. ” “ want to make out? ” “ you’re a terrible kisser. ” “ teach me how to kiss? ” “ i remember our first kiss. ” “ your lips are calling my name. ” “ let’s just kiss already. ”

[katiebishop]

ᴍʏ ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀs ᴍɪɢʜᴛ ɴᴏᴛ ʟᴀsᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ. ғᴏʀᴇᴠᴇʀ.

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TAGGED BY: @krxshka

Bold all that apply / italic what needs to be improved:

My muse knows how to…

bake a cake from scratch | ride a horse | drive a submarine | speak a second language | dance | catch a fish | play an instrument | throw a punch | build a deck | ice skate | unclog a drain | program a computer | change a flat tire | fire a gun | sew | juggle | play poker | paint | fly a kite | sculpt | write poetry | change a diaper | sing | shoot a bow and arrow | ride a bike | swim | sail a boat | do a back flip | play chess | give cpr | pitch a tent | flirt | stitch a wound | read palms | use chopsticks | write in cursive calligraphy | use an electric drill | braid hair | make a campfire | make a mixed drink | do sudoku puzzles | wrap a gift | give a good massage | jump-start a car | roll their tongue | do magic tricks | do yoga | tie a tie | skip a rock | shuffle a deck of cards | read morse code | pick a lock

TAGGING: @booyvh, @justapirateiusedtoknow, @fearframed, @stcmpthembigfccts, @polaroidreveries, @rageframed, @districtattorneydent, @australisms, @ all of you.

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❝ I’m going to make this way harder than it needs to be. ❞

@beaniebaby-sister || the office meme

     “ Wait, you should think this through.  I’m serious.  I mean, how many accidents are caused because someone went into it without thinking it through?  You just wanna make this harder so that other people feel your pain, but that’s not going to improve the healing process.  If anything, it’s going to make it worse. 

     Just know that I’m here for you.  If you ever need someone to vent to. “

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"Decent people everywhere will get offended."

@red-hemlock || the office meme

     “ What about the indecent?  I bet there’s more indecent people than decent. “

     “ Wait...  What are you going to be doing that’s going to be offending decent people?  Should I be worried? “

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❝ I don’t want to blame anyone in particular… I think everyone’s to blame. ❞

@justapirateiusedtoknow​ || the office meme

     “ Chloe! “

     Her room was a fucking disaster!  How in the Hell did she manage to do this?  And there she went again, trying to avoid trouble by putting the blame on other people.  There couldn’t have even been anyone else to do this, that’s how bad her habit has gotten.  I was gonna fix this habit of hers if it was the last thing I was going to do.  And it might after cleaning this mess.

     “ Who the Hell is else to blame?  You’re the only one in here!  I mean, look at this place.  I thought it was bad enough before, but, wowsers. “  There was dirty piles of clothes everywhere, and it seemed like she ditched her ashtray entirely and decided her room would work.  “ We’re cleaning this room together, missy. “

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-- -- ‘ PLOTTING CALL

     Hey guys!  So, I’ve got everything situated, I’ve got all my verses in check, and I’m ready to do some serious threads!  I’m excited to build chemistry between characters and the whole nine.  So, hit that heart and I’ll come into your IM to plot out some threads.