Reality Is Stranger Than Fiction

You really would not believe the things I have seen an heard in my daily life. Most of it isn't appropriate to put on my facebook, but here, I can be my pickle self and let it all loose.

[picklesticker]

If your crotch opens up into space, as in the universe, that's a bit of an issue. I don't believe my womanhood is kept in my vagina. This is just odd, thought provoking, but seriously. Straight dumb.

[picklesticker]

Nurses Having Attitudes:

RB: "did you do the inventory on this patient?"

Me: "no, there was a lot going on back here but I can help you now."

RB: *hangs up on me like a rude cunt.

Me: *walks over to her, "umm did you hang up on me?"

RB: "No I just thought it was done."

Me: "umm okay well I can help you now if you need it."

RB: "no never mind"

Really? Wtf?

[huffpost]

7 Powerful Abortion Stories, As Narrated By Famous Women

These are lines from just a few of the powerful abortion stories featured in a new video campaign called “

Draw The Line

.”

[manynamedshe]

People who perform manual labor should be not only given high and liveable wages, but unlimited access to healthcare and physical therapy to help manage the myriad conditions that come from doing back-breaking work.

Like this is not an absurd concept. It bothers me that people think that it is.

[mkailaw]

Hispanic Heritage Month is September 15- October 15

Native American heritage month is November.

Asian and Pacific Islander Heritage month is May.

Arab American Heritage Month is April.

Middle Eastern and North Africa Heritage Month is August.

Black History Month is February.

White History Month is January-December.

This is dedicated to all the white people that say it’s not fair to only have black history month. Y'all upset because we got a month yet y'all get twelve months. POC have to fit all their history and culture into one month, and y'all mad because y'all have/did so much history/destruction that y'all can’t fit it into a year? Hmm 🤔😳

[melaninboy]

[picklesticker]

Get out of here with that bogus bullshit. That's the most racist shit I've ever seen. So all white people contributed to this earth is destruction. Read a history book before you post some ignorant shit.

I guess white people just walk around being violent all the time...no wait....

[tastefullyoffensive]

[tastefullyoffensive]

[sizvideos]

Kids speak about racism

Video

[asdfghjkllkjjhgfds-deactivated2]

if this 12 year old can understand white privilege, so can u

[lavishpinkfleur]

Hmm

[picklesticker]

She understands people believe that she has white privilege even if it doesn't exist. Her guilt isn't any different than the feelings anyone else here is experiencing.

[guapular]

[asexualveganmystic-deactivated2]

Is he like the opposite of Bob Ross?

[picklesticker]

These paintings will be cursed for all of time.

[picklesticker]

Facebook Postings:

H: #INeedAGirlfriend

M replies: you should should just cut your dick off and color eyes on it and move the urethra up and down like a mouth talking back to you. call her sherry and she will be ur GF for life. since she was with you your whole life......

This is real, these are things my friends think.

[picklesticker]

This is a Real Conversation:

If I was trying to be sexy by putting on cat ears and sticking a horse tail buttplug in, but the buttplug got stuck and when I took a shit, it slid down the tail and then my horse tail became a poop tail, and the cat ears turned into two terds sticking out of the top of my head like terd unicorn, and then I turned into a giant terd coffee table and I stunk up your living room do you still think you would have sex with me?

[picklesticker]

I'm So Fracking Over It!

I've been so sick this week with some superbug and it's not even funny. I've been coughing and sneezing and I'm pretty sure that I'm going to infect any and everyone that I'm around.  Since I'm a decent human being that means I've stayed in my house for the last two days and I'm pretty sure at this point I'm going fracking bonkers! My husband is being an asshole, my dogs are bored, and I never thought I would say this but about over being in bed.  I'm pretty sure I also fracked up my sleep schedule and I don't think I could even stand taking another shower! 

On top of that a friend and I started a new diet this week that cost way to much money to just throw out the window.  It includes eating 3 meal replacement shakes, 3 health snacks that taste like rhinoceros assholes, and eating one veggi, and one fruit in the day.  So far I've lost 4 pounds but I can't tell if the headache is from the diet, or the sickness, and it doesn't really matter because it's not like eating normally would even make me feel any better.  I can't taste shit.

I was supposed to hang out with a friend earlier in the week and that didn't happen because I had to go into quarantine.  Then today I was supposed to go bowling with some other friends and thought maybe I would make it but NOPE! Then I feel bad canceling plans last minute and to top it all off my husband comes in the door, grabs his bag, and doesn't even acknowledge my presents before running out the door again.  

I swear I'm the most unappreciated person in the world!

[picklesticker]

So I had this really great idea for a vine video but it was night time and I was driving so I decided to pull over and go into a meijer bathroom to make the video. I'm in the handicapped stall talking all loud to myself and when I finished the video I look in the next stall and there are feet! Someone heard me talking to myself that whole time! Hahahahahha.

[picklesticker]

Coming home from working out in the car. So there are these construction cones in the road, three of them stacked on top of each other, literally in the middle of the lane, with the tip pointed towards me and knocked over on the ground. So I say "what the hell?" And slam my breaks and run into these cones right and now they are dragging on the ground stuck to the bottom of my car and I got like 12 yards and then I see the construction people working on something so I'm like "well might as well drive the cones to them" So I pull up in the middle of the road and back up and get out to give them these cones but this guy who looks like Sam from game of thrones comes running up doesn't even look at me grabs the cones and runs away.

[eddypurry-blog]

[picklesticker]

The lovely moment where you shatter your Iphone and there’s two touching penis’s on the back.

[exoergic]

[ouijasexting]

im fucking crYIN G omfg

[picklesticker]

Nurses being bitches

Nurse: "you forgot to put the locker number. What locker was their stuff in."

Me: "oh sorry I forgot let me go find out."

Nurse: *snatches papers* "never mind I'll just go do it!"

Me: *confused* (speaking to the charge nurse after nurse I was talking to storms off about the change in policy confusing me and that's why it wasn't done properly.)

Nurse: *comes back up to desk* "no it's been like this for months."

Me: "no it hasn't because I was on the committee so you can drop your snide attitude anytime today." In front of everyone.

Nurse: *face turns red*

GOOD BITCH IM FROM THE HOOD!