mk

me? I have a dream to finish

[pizzatime404]

I think with no responsibility. I write to myself and I remain the sole audience. I merely invite you all too, out of politeness.

If I could drink with God, I'd tell him the bar's too high. But I Know he'd say the bar doesn't exist. To write to others is the worst tragedy of all. He'd say how stuff is pretty ironic, life Can only be lived forward but can only make sense backward.

[pizzatime404]

I wish I wrote the way I thought.

Obsessively, compulsively, weakened, and naked to every bruise. Incessantly, uncontrollably, with maddening hunger. Words of cockeyed optimism and lies of hot, striking pain spiralling like tentacles into abysmal valleys of endless nothingness.

Lines dictated not by commas or periods, but by David Bowie songs and under the pressure to be perfect. The pretentious risk of writer's block and space-high hills of Renaissance philosophy; classy French words, and Berlin walls built on the assumption of difference in ability, all in exchange for a few slightly better poems in the hopes of 'high' art.

[pizzatime404]

maybe, the most hopeless haven't find their sunshine yet. and I find faith in the belief, that someday I'll be the sunshine of that person. I hope someone finds their faith in God through me. and then the whole world will be mine to dream.

somehow, I find myself attaching this feeling to one person: my favourite friend, cutest didi ever. through the last 4 months, she fought cancer and came back stronger than ever; meri प्रेरणा.

to shruti di, as I promised, I'm telling the whole world our story.

[pizzatime404]

"You believe in God?" "That's the wrong question. Does God believe in us?"

the scum of the earth. dust on the shoes of endless passers-by. humanity's rejected products. do they deserve love?

that is a question I wonder so much about. on one hand, they probably are in a situation they created themselves. a problem they themself couldn't solve.

but isn't nature a victim of this same mentality?

the sun sets to be looked at. the moon shines. grass blades reflect sweet dew. ocean waves retreat and come back. birds fly. all to be looked at. to be looked at, by you.