Please Option My Blog

OH I'M SORRY IS THAT TOO REAL FOR YOU?

[spicy-vaginal-tacos]

filed under more jokes i never understood until now

[catrulez]

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

Naming my fists

Looks like I need to think of new knuckles tattoo idea. Damn you, John Oates for spelling your name with an E.

[maxisadouchebag]

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

It rattled and shook, and smelled like a wet sheepdog, and moved the warm air around.

[wheninla-deactivated20160427]

WHEN I WENT TO THE LACMA MUSE COSTUME BALL

Starting the night…

Ending the night…

*~*~* WIN tickets and party at LACMA on Halloween in Stanley Kubrick style *~*~*

Check it out: http://www.lacma.org/kubrickball

We’ve got TWO PAIRS of tickets.

1st Pair goes to the the first to tweet @WHENINLATUMBLR and @LACMA 

2nd Pair goes to the first to reblog this with #wheninla #LACMA

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

#wheninla #LACMA

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

Coffee

Co-worker: I was told over the weekend that the amount of coffee i consume is awful for my tummy.

Me: I was told any less for me would be awful for my brain as well as everyone forced to interact or be around me.

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

I could listen to Liz Lemon speak German all night.

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

person: so do you watch any tv shows?

me: are you sure you're ready for this conversation

[heyoscarwilde]

I wonder now what Ernest Hemingway’s dictionary looked like, since he got along so well with dinky words that everybody can spell and truly understand.

- Kurt Vonnegut (via heyoscarwilde)

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

Because as a man I feel obliged to come across as this bland, generic entity that'll match up with this identicate of attractiveness that women carry around with them.

[lucilleandmitt]

(by way of anonymous)

[laisanendeavour]

NASA knows there’s no good reason.

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

Did you guys know Netflix sends you email notifications when shows add new seasons? How does it know what shows I'm waiting for? WHO CARES SERIES TWO SHERLOCK!!!

[wheninla-deactivated20160427]

WHEN MY FRIEND FROM OUT OF TOWN SEES A CELEBRITY

I’m like

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

I really want to get a tattoo that says 'Hakuna Matata' because it means 'No Worries' but I'll probably just replace 'Matata' with 'Vagina'.

[heyoscarwilde]

The cuss you are.

Wes Anderson film quotes by Nick McLellan :: via bigyellowbiohazard.deviantart.com

[pleaseoptionmyblog]

My sisters try to set me up with their new friend, a contributing blogger for HuffPo:

Me: One of her huffpo blog entries has a misused word in the very first line, so NOPE SHE'S OUT!

Sister: Good luck in life.