Nessa's poetry blog

Here are my poems and from time to time a little short story or a thought, laid down inbetween.

[poetrynessa]

Love life, joy

There is a way to make this quick. A way to get the hell out of Dodge. I know there is a way, but for the life of me, I can't find it. Can you ?

What is it that makes us chase meaning? Why do we need more? Why is this not enough, whatever this is?

Do you need more, than me, than you, than us?

Do you need someone else, well, of course you do, but do you not need me too?

Can't I be a part of the puzzle that completes you? Can I not love you, share you, celebrate you, just as the rest of them?

I would so love to love you. Forever. Or as long as this feeling lasts. Isn't that kind of forever?

Do break-ups only hurt when the feelings don't last equally long? When someone ends up thinking forever lasts longer than it ended up doing?

Can I make forever last a bit longer, if I take you out to dance tonight? Or if we stay in, and order pizza, or if I say, "hey, love, I think you should have a night out with your friends tonight, how about her, from this morning, maybe you should spend some time with her now, and come back to me, happy, satisfied and still wanting more, from me.

Why don't we enjoy this life together. And then we leave this at that. Just, enjoy. Joy. Life.

I don't know if I can do that, but I hope you can. I hope we can.

[poetrynessa]

Pride

I thought I had all the answers

But I guess I‘m just like all the rest

Too proud to say I was wrong

We say we are stupid

As if that is easier to admit

To stupidity

Then to plain fault

[poetrynessa]

Write what you know- I do

There‘s a poetry to the words I write

To the words I use when I tell you how I feel

To my feelings

There‘s a poetry

 If I write a story one day

It will be built on the words I‘ve known to describe my life

But not built on the life I‘ve lived

 When you first told me

I couldn‘t write what I didn‘t know

I took it literally

I looked deeply at my work

Wanted to throw it all away

Cause my life hadn´t been like that

 That doubt doesn‘t live with my any more

Cause I know I‘ve felt all these things

Maybe not for as long

Or for the same reason

But these feelings are mine

Thats why they met the paper

 If you think you can tell me

That I‘m not allowed to write about that

Then I‘ll tell you just how those feelings have been mine

But that might be a more intence story

Then the ones you subject yourself to

 Are you really ready for that?

[poetrynessa]

I’m queer and you should shut up

You threw me out of your box, into the trash and told me I was different.

I decided to embrace my different and make a box of my own, along with what else I found in your trash

You saw my box tidy up, look kind of like a normal box and you said

„Hey, we shouldn‘t stay in different boxes, that‘s discrimination“

I laughed and said

„My box isn‘t like your box and now that I‘ve made it, I kind of like it better. Your welcome to visit“

You whined

„But I don‘t fit in your box, I‘ll be the only one from my box to come“

I opened the door wide and said

„You can bring all your friends“

You yelled

„They won‘t come with me to the trash, are you crazy?“

I threw up my hands and stopped trying to reason with you.

 You told me I was different, threw me out of your box and into the trash

I decided to embrace my different and said, you know, this place is kind of nice

I invited the rest of my „different“ friends and we started calling each other „different“

You said, „We shouldn‘t label ourselves, we‘re all human“

I said, you gave me a label and I went with it, now shut up

 You threw me into the trash, told me I was different and out of your box

I decided to embrace my trash, build my own box and tell you that YOU were different

You got so mad, I didn‘t even hear what you said anymore

 ----Now think back, see if you can‘t fit labels like, „Black“, „POV“, „Immigrant“, „Queer“, „Gay“, „Lesbian“ ... etc.... in there and match them to everyday life.

[poetrynessa]

Like a train

Things in life have a way of just coming at you like a train. Everybody always thinks this means it heads to you at terrifying speed, garanteed to crush you against the rails if ypu happen to make the wrong step. Truth is, the train comes at a set time, to a place it is expected. Maybe you weren't aware of this schedule, or you got onto the wrong platform, so the train surprised you. But life has a way of coming at you, in a planned, timely manner, even if you show up in the wrong place.

[poetrynessa]

The world, the girl

There is a girl

That stares out my window

I think she sees something

More

Than my small view of Oslo

I think she sees the world

A lot more than we ever could

She makes me want to see

What she sees

I want to travel the world

From the edge of my bed

Right a long side with her

Imagine, seeing so much

From one place

I ask her, how?

She seems to snap back to right here

Just this room and answers

You have to open your eyes

The world is right there

[wordsnquotes]

And sometimes you didn’t want to know the end… because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing… this shadow. Even darkness must pass.

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Two Towers (via mirroir)

Normally, this blog is my own poetry only, but this, this, speaks to me. It’s in tune with most of my darker work. You will get through this. A bright point will come. The darkness will pass.

[writeworld-blog]

Writer’s Block

A picture says a thousand words. Write them.

Mission: Write a story, a description, a poem, a metaphor, a commentary, or a critique about this picture. Write something about this picture.

Be sure to tag writeworld in your block!

[poetrynessa]

I can‘t decide if it‘s the freckles or the red, red hair. Who am I kidding, it‘s the hair. Falling in waves, -- that I‘d hate to have so loose myself, but love on her – just framing that pale face that‘s somehow still filled with so much colour. She‘s like everything you ever want, drawn to her before you even hear her speak. You want to bury your face as close to that hair as possible and maybe seek out the freckles that you know spread farther than just that beautiful face. You want to seek them out. Kiss them.

[poetrynessa]

Falling deeper

As trains rush by, you sit, somehow enjoying the quiet and watch the water. It's still. The surface at least, but you know better. Nothing is that still. If you look down under, there are strong currents that will drag you away if you slip and fall. It's okay though. You're sitting way up here at the trees, watching the other bank. It looks the same as the one your sitting on, beautiful autumn coloured trees stacked in the hillside, but somehow, everything looks more grand, more beautiful on that side. Maybe it's always easier to see the beauty when you take a step back. The woods you're sitting in, they feel more looming than those beuatiful ones over there. Those are bathed in sunlight and they are mirrored in the water and here, you feel like there are shadows in every corner. The ground under you is damp and your nose is filled with the murky scent of trees, but over there, it doesn't seem so crowded, like maybe, each tree gets a little bit more space to grow. --You know of course, that last night, you sat on that very bank, basking in the sun and you couldn't believe how far away this one was. Then you woke up and here you are, falling deeper into the woods, for safety, because that body of water just might drag you away.

[poetrynessa]

She turns

looks

and god, it’s like a laser

that’s meant to carve out a space

in your heart

just for her

her curls

her smile

lips

her fingers

hand

all settles in

this carved out space

just for her

[poetrynessa]

Noise

The clatter of a heel High tones of whisperd gossip Sound of lips smacking glass Pitter-patter of toddlers, still stuck By their mothers' side, All is it a constant All is it society, - and noise

[poetrynessa]

A child(hood) lost

A child Lost On a streetcorner Far from home From mommy Daddy, Big sis and little bro Waiting For a car With dreams and candy For free, no chores, Just love and me

[poetrynessa]

MISS YOU

When the sun sets

I think of you.

When the clouds swim

in the sky

I think of you.

When I turn off the lights,

I think of you.

When I sit and stay quiet

I think of you.

And when I lie and sleep,

I dream of you.

-nessa

[poetrynessa]

White walls

White walls stare at me

I feel like painting,

but I don‘t know what.

White walls box me in

I feel like running,

but I don‘t know where.

White walls like fire

I feel like howling,

but I don‘t know how.

Do you see the picture yet?

I think it‘s black stripes on

these picture perfect white walls.

Am I running yet?

I think I‘m going towards

these picture perfect white walls.

Do you see the smoke yet?  

I think we‘re burning,

these picture perfect white walls and I.

-nessa

[poetrynessa]

Where the lamp shines

Let your light shine

Through the transparent plastic

Because I know you can beat everything

Win all

And tomorrow you‘ll be offered world domination

In someone’s lucky heart

  But don’t bother with that

Because you don’t have it in you

To live as a monarch

Rather wait for someone who’ll rule with you

  Go instead out into the world

And find where you’ll light everything

The good and the bad

And all the rest too

  Show that you have power over your matters

But also, how good you are at team work

Because who doesn’t want to work with you?

  You’ll finally find someone that will light up the world

While you take a nap

  The one that's the moon to your sun

-nessa

[poetrynessa]

Boxed in

One morning, I woke up to find the ceiling staring back at me. Well, maybe it wasn‘t, really staring, but it sure as hell felt like it. I felt like the ceiling, the desk, the bedroom closet and my black window curtains, with little white birds printed on them, they were all staring at me. I felt boxed in, unable to move, unable to even stand up.

Pinned to the bed, I panicked. What would I do now? How could I explain to my boss, my mother, my friends that I wasn‘t able to stand up right now. I couldn‘t, simple as that. Everything was weighing me down. It wasn‘t that I wasn‘t strong enough, tough enough. My obsticles were just too difficult to overcome. They required too much energy and even when I could get out of bed, I couldn‘t do anything except lie back down, because it left me exhausted.

 -nessa

[poetrynessa]

Blue sky

May the angel be born on a cold winters night and the blue sky opens

-nessa